Kit Leffler/Jayplay photographer
By Natalie Johnson, Jayplay writer
Few things attract a crowd like free food. At least, that's the theory of hosts of college events, who try to lure a perpetually broke and hungry demographic with pizza, cookies and soda.
After another week of being too poor to buy pizza, cookies, soda, or anything else, I decided to live for a week exclusively on the vittles offered by KU's fine events and organizations.
The rules
2. I can drink whatever.
1. I can only eat that which is free and provided by, paid for, or on the campus of the University of Kansas.
3. I can't toe the line with Jell-O or milk shakes.
4. The experiment lasts a work week: 8 a.m. Monday to 5 p.m. Friday.
The highlights
Sunday, 7:30 p.m.
My Last Supper is at Ten at the Eldridge. I meet some friends for a nice leisurely meal. I have the Portobello "Oscar" style. No appetizer, but I have whiskey.
Monday, 9:21 a.m.
I duck into the St. Lawrence Catholic Center food pantry. I am greeted with half a bag of coconut shavings, a large can of cream of mushroom soup and ramen noodles. Ramen is my breakfast.
Troy Hinkel, director of theological education in St. Lawrence Catholic Center, says they offer two or three free food events per month, and that the students' pantry is always available. Hinkel says the pantry operates
on the honor system, with donations from members of the community and the hope that only students in need will take the food.
2:25 p.m.
I find out there are free donuts and juice in Stauffer-Flint Hall's Reading Room, leftover treats from a guest hosted by the School of Journalism. I rush to Stauffer-Flint. Grab a donut. Hesitate. Grab another.
6:05 p.m.
I eat pizza at the St. Lawrence Catholic Center following a speech about Notre Dame's law school. I stagger home, feeling ill.
9:35 p.m.
A cup of chai doesn't fill me up.
Tuesday, 9:30 a.m.
I meet Melissa Feeney, Wichita freshman, at her dorm and use one of her free passes for breakfast. I stuff myself.
Everyone with a meal plan gets free meals on their account, says Sheryl Kidwell, assistant director for KU Memorial Unions. The largest plan (500 meals) includes eight free meals and the smallest (100 meals) has two free meals. Kidwell says 90 percent of the free meals were redeemed in the 2005 spring semester.
I meet a friend at her sorority and pillage the kitchen, devouring leftovers and Baked Lays.
4:10 p.m.
Wednesday, 8:27 a.m.
I have the St. Lawrence ramen. 2:15 p.m.
department was offering free hot dogs a couple hours ago. I die a little inside.
Lunch is cherry coke. I am told some
Famished, I visit the blood drive in the Student Recreational Center. Anemia prevents me from donating but not from begging.
Leann Delong, donor recruiter for the Community Blood Center, says the Center has a blood drive each semester at the University. She says the Center usually offers cookies and juice, and that occasionally pizza is donated as well. She is a goldmine food source, inviting me to take whatever food I want and giving me a bag with food coupons.
I sit down to the best meal of the week: the "faith forum" dinner in Ecumenical Christian Ministries, 1204 Oread Ave. It is a hot meal, prepared in a real kitchen. They ask for a $3 donation but Thad Holcombe, campus minister, assures me it's alright if I don't pay. No one seems to mind that I'm there for the free food.
4:10 p.m.
6 p.m.
Holcombe says anyone is invited to the weekly forum for a meal and to talk about "progressive Christianity." He says they have a core group, about 20 people, who show up every week.
Thursday, 11 a.m.
Veggie lunch at ECM. The place is packed.
3 p.m.
3 p.m. Tea Time in the Kansas Union. I go through the line three times so I can get more cookies.
Student Union Activities sponsors the weekly Tea Time, says Michelle Rissky, who works in public relations for SUA.The funds are awarded from student senate.
4:12 p.m.
I ecstatically redeem a coupon for a free 6-inch Yellow Sub sandwich.
11:25 p.m.
I am hungry. My roommate Annie prances around me, commenting on what a terrific snack celery and peanut butter is. I glare, sipping on chai.
I feast on margaritas and fajita salad at El Mezcal.
I am too exhausted to redeem a free taco coupon, or to sneak into a faculty-and-staff hors d'oeuvres social in the Alumni Center.
7 p.m.
It's not a healthy way to go, it's not a reliable way to go, and it's not a comfortable way to go. I wouldn't recommend it. But you could subsist almost exclusively on free food, if your wallet so demands.
Friday, 8:30 a.m.
Just keep your eyes on the sidewalk ads and your schedule book open, and let the University take care of the rest.
2 p.m.
St. Lawrence's ramen.
I steal Annie's Dr. Pepper.
3:30 p.m.
Jayplay 10.20.03
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