Down the aisle before the hill
By Chris Moore, Jayplay writer
Renee and Anthony didn't have a huge wedding. Their parents weren't even at the ceremony. Their wedding photographer was just a person who was lucky enough to have a camera with them. After leaving the courthouse ceremony, they took everyone out for coffee. Their parents found out about the marriage thanks to a drunken call from a friend at a New Year's Eve party.
By choosing to say "I do," while still trying to get a degree and a job of choice, students have the added responsibilities of a spouse in their life.
Paul-Anthony Whaley, Manhattan freshman, and Renee Whaley, Olathe junior, decided to get married before they graduated. Being out of school wasn't a major factor in their decision.
"We wanted to get married while we were in college," Renee says. "It makes us financially independent from our parents for financial aid. We get more money from our government."
Dr. John Wade, licensed counseling psychologist and outreach coordinator at Counseling and Psychological Services (CAPS) says there is no universal reason why students decide to get married while still in school. "Each couple has their own story in why it seems like the right thing to do," he says. He says a small percentage of students are getting married.
Todd Cohen, associate director for University Relations, says married students are on the decline. In 2003, there were 962 registered married couples on campus, just 3.5 percent of the student population. In 2004, it dropped to 799 about 3 percent.
Murkv waters
Wade says couples at CAPS face a variety of problems, whether in their marriage or as students at the University.
"Within the couples I see here, issues vary," Wade says. "Some more common issues are dealing with stress as a couple. Being married and going to school is obviously a source of stress."
Wade also counsels students who plan to get married as well. While major concerns aren't present at the time, seeking pre-marital counseling is a way to address issues the couple has about career goals, finances, dealing with inlaws and child care.
Anthony thinks birth control is an important issue to discuss before marriage. Renee agrees. "Let's not make babies yet," says Renee.
Mario Antoine, Anthony senior, and Hannah Aldritt, Harper junior, are engaged right now and plan to wed next September before they graduate.
Antoine and Aldritt say they give each other motivation to go to class each morning. Antoine says it's much easier.
er to skip class when he doesn't have someone next to him nudging him to go to class. He says when the two start living together, they'll have their own schedules and priorities to consider.
Whenever a couple has problems, Wade says both sides should talk to each other and analyze the issue carefully. Marriage is all about cooperation.
"If you're on the fence," he says, "look at the reason you are on the fence."
Help from Uncle Sam
Renee says marriage has been a huge financial responsibility.
"Lawrence is a hard place because we are both young and there are not a lot of jobs for us. That adds more stress to the relationship. I wish we could move somewhere else and have the jobs we want." she says.
The United States government is willing to lend a helping hand to students who tie the knot. According to the 1040A Tax Form of 2005, a student can deduct up to $4,000 for qualified tuition and fees if his or her adjusted gross income (AGI) is no more than $130,000 (if married and filing jointly). Married students can deduct up to $2,000 if their AGI is higher than the limit, and more than
House and to hold
The University of Kansas has accommodations for married couples. Stouffer-Place Apartments are eligible only to married students and students with children. Eric Grospitch, assistant director for residence life, says he gets 40 to 50 applications annually. Students who apply have to provide documentation and contracts of either parental or marital status.
Andrea Ash, Salt Lake City doctoral student, and resident of Stouffer-Place, has been married for 10 years and likes living at Stouffer-Place with her husband.
Renee and Anthony say they are happy together and while they do face problems from time to time, they say they don't let it get to them.
Marriage statistics
Married couples at the University of Kansas have been on a steady decline since the early '80s. Here are the numbers of registered married students on campus since 1985.
Year Married
1985 3598
1990 3573
1995 2280
2000 1622
Source: University of Kansas Office of Institutional Research and Planning
2004 799
10| Jayplay 10.6.05