University Daily Kansan
Monday, July 16, 1973
5
comment
A Fantasy of Selective Enforcement Brought Home
Bv ZAHID IQBAL
Kansan Associate Editor
"Wooloo-whoooo-hooo!"
I ducked as the tiny plane made passes. It was like a fly buzzing for something sweet stuck on my moustache.
It was unreal, to say the least.
The my sitting in the plane was short, his light-colored hair thinning on top. He looked harmell enough, was clean-shaven and wore an ordinary business suit.
What struck me as unusual was the sight of stars—denoting the rank of Ar Marial—that were stuck on his forhead, and the gleam in his eye. The gleam of the eye.
Suddenly, the plane swooped over my head and stopped in mid-air about three feet from my nose. The man in the plane jumped out, eyed me up and down very coldly through a magnifying glass, and began to gaggle helplessly.
AFTER HE WAS satisfied that I was absolutely terrified, (and that took about 40 seconds), he pulled a pair of handcuffs out of a sack of fluff he carried with him. Twirling the handcuffs, he advanced upon me.
I took a step backward and backed into a nine-foot-high volume of the Kansas Annotated Statutes. The handcuffs came closer.
Then, instead of screaming with fear, I began to laugh.
I had just noticed the man's arm. They were about 8 inches too short for a man of
How to Land with Both Feet, But Only One Planted Firmly
his height. My laughter checked his advance
Suddenly he was gone in a cloud of smoke, alone with his plane.
I sighed with relief.
All that remained was a momentary blackness and then, across the skies, appeared the words "The Short Arm of the Law."
I had been dreaming. I'd had these symbolic-prophetic dreams for the better part of three years, and they'd done a lot for me. But this would take some deciphering. I told myself. As the dream stood at the moment, it made no sense to me.
I went back to sleep, hoping a second part of the dream would follow.
SUDDENLY, there was this bottle sitting by me.
I mean a real bottle, with arms and legs
and everything
It said, "Tm Bud. I'm one of 3.2 GPA students based in the Union, Pleasiamac-t
I told him I was pleased to meet him, too. I would have told him my name, but just then the loudest laughter I had heard in some time assailed our ears. It was a huge bottle, running around without even a label covering its middle.
Both Bud and I were shocked, and were more than a bit apprehensive as the bottle
"Shay, are you guys tending the con-bention?"
made straight toward us.
We looked blankly at him, wondering what he was talking about.
"You mean a convention," Bud suddenly
sayed.
Bud had begun to introduce himself but the other bottle cut in.
And with a help of delight he was off, running off toward one of the residence balls. I just stared and watched him disapare up the hill.
BY MY SIDE, Bup appeared to be swatting at a fly on his thigh but all he was doing was striking himself; he had just placed the strange bottle-without-a-label.
"That was Johnny! Oh, damn; why didn't recognize him?" Bud said, striking his finger.
"Johnny Walker, stupid," Bid answered, at me as if I was an imbecile
Johnny?" I said, "Who he?"
"Is that someone I know?" I asked, "He
maybe a foreigner to me; British,
maybe."
"He's a Scot," Bad informed me in a tone that he might have reserved for saying, "I'll be there."
"What's he doing here?" I asked. "In
fact," said, turning to Bad. "what the heck you bottleed in long here? know you bottles, I said."
"Oh, but that's awful," I said. "Let's do something about it."
“Oh, I am,” Bud hastened to assure me. “But I'm pretty sure about Johnny Walker. He really shouldn't be going up the hill to that residence hall and, as I know he will do, I'm hoping to help ripening people up and making them fall off on their faces when they try to walk.”
We explained what we had seen and told him he should really be going after Mr. Walker, the intemperate intruder upon sacred state property.
THE WORDS were hardly out of my mouth when, "whoom-woom," the plabe was back, manned by the Air Marshal himself. Both of us yelled at him and in a trice he was standing before us, handcuffs and magnifying glass in hand.
But it so transpired that our knowledge of Kansas state law was wrong. Bottles were allowed on The Hill if they had received the instructions, said was called "R.B.'s hshot sanction."
"Besides," the air Marshal informed us, pointing to what I had thought was a bag of flour. "I'm after this." He bit a bit of fine cheese and took a bite. "That's mate a hard hand! It $1,600 worth."
A sudden thought struck him. He came close to us, and suddenly turned us upside down. I don't even remember how, with his terrific short arms, he managed to do it.
We waited helplessly as he shook us out,
comment
8 New Tennis Courts May Solve Problems, But . . .
By C. S. GROOM Kangan Staff Writer
Eight new tennis courts behind Robinson gym are almost completed. Lines are being drawn, and with nets, the courts should be ready any day. Ah, great. Now we won't have to wait so long when we get that tennis court are more than a few BUTS in the way.
BUT. Look where the courts are. About 13 feet from the road. This means that serious players concentrating on the game will be interrupted by cars flashing by.
BUT. These courts are made out of sidewalk-type cement. Give them a few years and they'll be just as slippery as the regular Robinson courts.
BUT. CHECK the new fences. The way they've been built, there are rather large separations of fence in the middle. This means that the not-so-serious tennis players are going to have a problem when they frequently goof.
They'll have to run into the middle of Naismith Drive sometimes to retrieve their tennis balls. Traffic problems are foreseeable. If this turn out to be a bad situation, the sub-type nets could be attached to the fences to avert the escape of the tennis balls.
BUT. There was a rumor that some (or even all) of the old Robinson courts were on their way to the election.
new hospital. According to a man who was working on the new courts, that rumor was not true. If it had been true, it would have been solved. A ruling in asking problem wouldn't have been solved.
BUT. THE HIGH wind of the old Robinson courts will probably be a greater problem on the new courts, because the gym isn't directly behind the new courts to ward off some of that pressure. That may not be too grave a problem. We shall see.
And how about a water fountain? Or is that really asking too much? Granted that there are some really fine water fountains that aren't open but then, that gym isn't open all the time.
Another fine thing—I looks as if three lights will attempt to cover all of the new buildings in our district. We cover six courts, as is the situation at theOLD Robinson courts, we'll have three lights to cover eight NEW Robinson courts. The old judges say we have to conserve electricity.
Tennis players are somewhat gratified,
Tourney Completed Despite Raindrops
its 400 entrants hampered by only a few drops of rain on Saturday, the 3rd annual Lawrence Parks and Recreation Tennis Tournament is over.
A new scoring method called the "nobadantage point system," established for use in tournaments this year by the United States Association, was used to help save time.
David Phillips, Independence; senior men's doubles, Mike Howard, Lawrence, and Rich Jones, Kansas City; senior women's singles, Sue Oerelt, Mason City, Iowa; sophomore women's winters, Iowa Independence, Mo., and Oerelt; mixed doubles, Phillips and Lewis.
Oh, well, indeed, that is another question, which we'll think about while we're hitting the ground.
commended for building these new courts, with tennis fast becoming the up-and-up sport. Adn yet, we can't understand why new tennis courts are built when the University cannot even afford to keep some of its better faculty.
however, to see the new courts. The thought of having lines on the courts that you can see, at least for a while, is euphoria in itself. The thought of sets that aren't ripped and turned up that are completely useless, or the elanation point from most tennis players.
Title winners were: senior men's singles.
Olga to Say 'Goodby' If Ban Put on Stunts
BUT THEN A thought of priorities comes into mind. The University should be
MOSCOW (AP)-Olga Korbut, the diminutive Russian gymnast with the impish smile, says she may say 'goodbyo to gymnastics forever' because an international federation says her performances are too dangerous.
The 18-year-old Munich Olympic star warned of her possible early retirement after a fall at the International Gymnastics Federation that banned certain elements of her program, particularly her breath-taking double back-zip. It also the balance beam, from future competitions.
"It the decision is put into effect," she said in an interview published in the official sports organ, Sovietskay Sport, "then I will not see any place for myself in gymnastics."
Federation's Assembly in Rotterdam next November.
In Chiasei, Switzerland, the president of the Gymnastics Federation, said Olaa was free to continue her breath-taking performances at least until November.
The 88-pound Olga, who captured three gold medals at Munich and belied western images of Russian female athletes as she battled the French coach invented her complicated routine.
Arthur Gurden explained Sunday that the proposed rule still required approval by the
"We showed it to the whole world and it was accepted." she said.
"Probably there are other ways, too, but I never realized that our way was worthy of condemnation and should be banned," she said. "We're in anyone and we didn't ask for privileges."
"We just asked for the opportunity to follow the road, but we were refused. Therefore, it is a great pity, but I will always say to goodbye to gymnastics forever."
"After the Olympic Games, Oliga said, she was so ashamed" because she couldn't reply to all the letters she received asking for advice on gymnastics.
"But now I don't know even what to reply since my kind of gymnastics has been hard."
baseball standings
Ryan Hurls Another No-Hitter
New York W. L. Pct. G.B.
Boston 62 52 65
Baltimore 48 40 45
Detroit 46 39 54 171
Milwaukee 46 39 45 171
Cleveland 44 46 489 6
Chicago 44 46 489 6
AMERICAN LEAGUE
Oakland 52 40 405 365 —
Kansas City 50 45 435 —
California 51 47 435 —
Minnesota 46 42 417 514 —
Chicago 46 43 417 514 —
Tampa 44 41 411 514 —
NATIONAL LEAGUE
W. 10 L. Pct. G.B.
Chicago 60 41 17
St Louis 42 47 528
Northfield 42 46 47 719
Pittsburgh 42 46 47 719
Philadelphia 41 49 456 819
Warren 41 49 456 819
Los Angeles
San Francisco
Cleveland
Houston
Alabama
San Diego
59 34 623 7
52 41 41 623
51 41 41 623
40 46 521 10
54 46 51 10
40 51 463 16
41 51 463 16
California 4, Derrick 0, Monroe 12
Baltimore 3, Cincinnati City 0
Baltimore 3, Cincinnati City 0
Oakland 8, Milwaukee 5
Cleveland 7, Cleveland 10, innings
5, innings
Houston 2; Philadelphia 6; olinnis 4;
Los Angeles 5; New York 1.
San Francisco 12; Pittsburgh 8;
Los Angeles 4; San Diego 15;
Los Angeles 4.
Shortstop Rudy Meioli saved the no-hitter with a leaping catch of Gates Brown's one-line drive in the ninth, the hardest ball the Titers hit all day.
DETROIT (AP) -- Fastht pitcher Nolan Ryan of the California Angels hurled a no-hitter and struck out 17 in beating the Detroit Tigers 6-0 Sunday. He became the fifth pitcher in baseball history to hurl two no-hitters in one season.
The only other pitcher to throw two no-niters in the same year were Johnny Vander Meer of the Cincinnati Reds in 1983, Allie Reynolds of the New York Yankees in 1951, Detroit's Virgil Trucks in 1952 and Jim Maloney of the Reds in 1965.
It was the 12th time this season and 43rd time in Ryan's career that he struck out at least nine times.
Weiskopf Wins British Crown, Says He'll Still Play Regularly
Ryan, a 6-foot-1, 259-pound Texan, pitched his first no-hitter against the Kansas City Royals on May 15, walking three and striking out 12.
The only Detroit baserumers, all on walks, were Brown with two out in the first innning. Mickey Stanley leading off the fourth, Dick Sharon with one out in the sixth. He got out of base in the sixth. Nob got past first base. Kyran retired the last 10 Detroit batters.
tander allowed four baserunners, all on walks.
Vander Meer is the only man to pitch consecutive no-hitters when Maloney pitched.
"There's only one man alive who can turn it on and off that's Jack Nicklaus," Weiskopf said after he scored his first hole. "He was the last in, mistaining rain at the old course at Troom.
TROON, Scotland (AP)—Tom Weiskopf's going to get in a few hunting tips.
But there'll be no more of those three-month absences from the game of golf, like he did last year, for the newly crowned British Open king.
Only 10 Tigers hit the ball against Ryan as he evened his 1973 record at 11-11 and boosted his strikeout total to 220 in 189 innings. Other than Brown's ninth-inning line drive to short, only Northrup's fly ball to center fielder Ken Berry leading off the sixth inning was hit tight but it was still a routine catch.
"I can't do that. Not yet, anyhow. I can't go away for four or five weeks and come back and win like Jack. I've got to keep on running." And I've told that what's I'm going to do," he said.
His 276 total, 12 under par, was three in front of U.S. Open champ Johnny Miller and the defending champion Lance Armstrong and Coles a 66 for the final round. Nicklaus closed with a course record 65 and was alone at 280. Lee Trevino, who had won this year, reached the last two wins, was well on track at 289.
ched 10 hitless innings in his first 165 no-hitter to lose on to loss in the h11.
Weiskopf, the leader all the way, held a
The tall, 38-year-old Weiskopf, who now has won four times in his last seven starts while finishing no worse than fifth during that stretch, said he would be going to Alaska for a bighorn sheep hunt but would take no more long breaks from golf.
margin of two or three strokes most of
the round and round, with a two in-
ward retention. 70
The Angels got the game's first run against Jim Perry, 9-9, in the third on one-out singles by Art Kusner and Sandy Alomar and Vada Pinson's sacrifice fly. They added five more in the eighth against Perry and three relievers on a two-run hit by Austin Johnson RBI single by Bob Oliver and a two-run single by Alan Gallagher.
The crowd of 41,411 was rather compac-
tient despite Kyran's brilliant pitching
and his ability to strike.
The hard-throwing pitcher, who was the first starter in the game on Dec. 18, 1974, played Stanley, Brown and Norm Cash, the second, third and fourth place hitters in the Detroit line-up, in the game.
Stanley grounded to short on a one-strike patch, Brown lined short and Cash popped
frisked our pockets and examined the ground around us with his magnifying
THEN HE SWOOPED Bud into the plane, leaving me alone and bewildered. Once more, the plane took off, drowning out cries I tell you I'm legit: "I'm one of the 3.2 guys."
I decided I had better get to a safe place—like Vietnam—before something similar happened.
The sound of a little truck with KU markings distracted me. It was filled with paper cups and buckets of ice. I though it pretty strange that it was driving up the hill from the lights, but then a resounding cheer from the truck was heard. We were: the truck had reached its destination.
I thought it was time I left the place. I backed again into the 9-foot-high Kansas
law book and almost toppled it over. It
five open to a page marked "Exemptions"
"—of which there were many. (I only
gave to 'B') for banker and then gave it up.)
up.)
"Whohm-whom." In the distance the plane was coming back.
I was taking no chances, what with the law kind of leaning so heavily on us student body?
I just went downstreet to get some booze and get drunk. But I was really out of luck.
Then blackness enveloped me. The Title
Short Arm of the Law" flashed across the
screen. "Is it really that bad?"
Talk of crazy dreams. If this one makes any sense, you probably more than I like.
It seems all the hard liquor in town got sold out last week.
KANSAN CLASSIFIED RATES
KANSAN WANT ADS
One Day
12 week additional $11.99
12 week additional $9.91
Three Days
12 week additional $10.28
12 week additional $9.43
Three Weeks
12 week additional $9.63
Accommodations, goods, services and employment advertised in the University Daily Kannan are offered to the students at the University of Chicago. PLEASE REMIND ALL CLASSIFIED TO 111 FLINT HALL.
FOR SALE
NORTH SIDE Country Shop—3 Baskets No. of the kitchen furniture, gas heating and cooking kitchen furniture, gas heating and cooking kitchen furniture, gas heating and cooking pot bain marie and monkey bread go spice up your kitchen and 1½ bushel bakes & wood creations banana and 1½ bushel bakes & wood creations also cord price. Baked almonds, bread and wheat baked almonds. Bread and wheat baked almonds. Open 9 to 9, days 844-3139. Heating Open 9 to 9, days 844-3139.
Western Civilization Notes—Now On Sale!
There are two ways of looking at it!
If you don't, you must a dismember
1. If you use them, you're at an advantage.
You're at a disadvantage.
Either way it comes to the same thing—
*New Analysis of Western Civilization*
*Available now at campus Madhouse, Town Crier*
PFEZA IP ZMOSRGASSBORG: All the pizza you
want. 12:00 - 13:30, 1066 w 28th only.
Monday - Friday 11:30-13:00, 1066 w 28th only.
GARB 4" T Speakers housed in 10 wood cable
cabinet. 36 inch speaker. $150. Call truck at 3 p.m.
at Wash. Tech; $150. Call truck at 3 p.m.
at Wash. Tech.
250 YAHAH A47   rear kbracken  Kaspin belt
250 YAHAH  raced $450. Call 841-114 or see at
7-19
For sale: 1055 VW, red with gold trim; Rebuild
engine: AM radio -$600, phone 842-7653, 7-18
Instructor moving, must sell 172 Hygroma 250 XL,
instructor condition; Call 814-663-9633 for application.
For appointment call 814-663-9633.
FREE! KEEP! Kittens, part Perian, Free-842-
5768. 7:17
SHOWROOM CONDITION - 191N. VW Campground with vehicle is in outstanding condition both mechanically and in appearance. Only required for use in a 191N. It has had periodic maintenance every 3,600 miles. A great campground for ingressively recreational use. Is a large room for ingressively recreational use. If seriously interested call 843-220-7500 above whiteness. If seriously interested call 843-220-7500 above whiteness.
For sale. Twin bed, mattress, box springs,
conditioned condition, $0. Call 661-7355
after $3 MONTH 7-23
For Sale: Firm single mattress and spring with
frame. Reasonable price. Call 892-648-00
7-23
16 Gal Aquarium-$7.50;
5 Gal Aquarium-$5.00; both metal frame in
AMPEG B-15 instrument amplifier, 15' speaker
Excellent for electric guitar or organ, 843-8095
Virgin recliner--needs some repair--$10.00.
Call 825-5498 after noon anytime.
7-23
NOTICE
"PIZZA FOR LUNCH BUNCCH"- Small Pizza or
"PIZZA FOR LUNCH $45 at Iowa Pizza
Co."
RAY AUDIO-have you heard the new H-720 Speaker! You have youudied you could listen to room? You can at RAY AUDIO, where low prices are our thing. 728 Rhode Island St. 842-365-1990
105 Michigan St. Bar-B-Q, We Bar-B-Que in 225 W. Madison Ave., 7th floor. A slab at here can be $49. Large rib plate 3 lb chicken plate MKS. Found of beef 225 Bef Bar-B-Q. Sum. Dim. Sum and Tables. Pipe 2.910-815 515 Mith St.
Indian Foods: Dalls, Samarai, Powder, Mango
Indian Street Food: Tofu, Chicken, Mango,
Grocery Store, TB 780, MB 93-746, KI 84-746
GRANTS PET SIOP now has Monkova Parcels
and 15 other pet store locations. Only $269,
$349, or $419 per month. Except Thursday,
$349, $399, or $449 per month.
WAXMAN CANDLES have more uniquely designed materials and a new design called the Doyle Candle. WAXMAN CANDLES are also made in New York, NY.
For Sale: Noble sewardian with chord sets chair,
843-000-5000 food table host - call Mr.Haye, H43-
843-000-5000
Next time you pay your rent * ask for a
key card * ask for something for your
money. Afterwards, after you leave
Ridgeview Mobile Home Sales
9-9 weekdays 1-8 Sundays
Call anytime 843.8400
WAXMAN CANDLES make candles to burn, not melt.
Candles are the WAXMAN at 7: 40AM - 7:23AM
candles see the WAXMAN at 7: 40AM - 7:23AM
Only at HALF A BACK MUCH can you find the 20%. You will find it in the back of the furniture to all sorts of good品. MUCH 75, Mass 125, Sense 65, 85.
**FREE RENTAL SERVICE**
**RONALDY* "HONOUR YOUR LOVE IS PREcious IN CLASS"
Meeting, Monday, 7:30 p.m. Union; SOCIALIZING - 842-5779; COUNSELLING/RAP - 864-3568
Course: GATE LAYERAGE; Box 244; 7-23
FOR RENT
Rental RENTAL SALE $2500. For the latest in RENTAL SALE in rental for the latest in RENTAL RENTAL Rental Exchange. 7-26 5001. 901 Kentucky. 7-26
TOO FAR FROM CAMPUS? TIRED OF STEEP
ROAD? Try 2 bedroom bed, directly across Mast
from stadium. Easy walking distance of major
horse track. Great access to indoor vision,
swimming pool; security服务。Reasonable rates, furniture available. Ideal roommates or couples in Sancte Apts. 1123, Ind. 9 or 10.
Five Days
15 words or fewer: $2.50
each additional word: 8.03
Apartment, furnished, clean, quiet, some air conditioned and off street. Two bedrooms, 886-729-5610.
For rent—One & two bedroom furnished apart-
ment with pool, view now and Aug 1st;
five room furnished apartment now.
Rooms for men, furnished, with or without cook-
ing facilities. RU and near downstairs.
men. 943-857-7611
College Hill Manor has 1 and 2 bedroom luxury apartments. available now at reduced summer rates. The three bedrooms have a spacious apt in fully carpeted with central air, electrical upgrades, dispensoir, and dishwasher. The three bedrooms have 3 blocked southwest of campus with bus access. See us at 174. Wilson 191, Ft. 84-8320, 84-8320.
Apartment and room for students=Attractively furnished apartment near campus; large living room, share kitchen. Also furnished room, share bath and kitchen, utility bills. Call 843-9475, or email us at info@milton.edu.
WANTED
Charming two-room furnished apartment available in Chandler, AZ. Kitchen kitchen includes 900 sq ft of space with breakfast entrances. Kitchen kitchen includes 900 sq ft of space with breakfast entrances.
We still need undergraduate volunteers for our ongoing research project on communication processes. Involves 30-35 minutes to complete a number of tasks, including: (a) calling all Mr. Roth at 8412-8418 or 7439-7418
Renominate needed for 79-74 school year. An
admission fee of $150 per student. Warder-dwr:
immediate immigrant, immigrant $20 per child.
Permanent immigrant $30 per child.
Wanted: DATSUN 510 or TOYOTA CORONA
Wanted: DATSUN 510 or TOYOTA CORONA,
position #142. Prefer ordered, PN 310-783-6400.
Fleet No. BD-783-6400.
TYPING
IMPORTANT - Need one or more persons to leave the room. CALL ME: 415-290-3232 after any time a 30 AM call. # 4-19
WANTED: Three Christian girls need another commitee to work in Aylmer Tower Township.
Typing- my home   IBM Select2-Pica type
Typing- experienced 实习生
Call Katie, 841-255-7244  T-244
Typing done on cell electric typwriter, wnthesis please. Call Mrs. Hays. 843-905-726
- 7-26
direction in guiding them. Illustrative photos from classroom use show the various directions that students can navigate, including upward, horizontal, spiraling, upward
LOST
Experienced these typus files. Close to campus 841-4894. Myra. Also minor editing and or por.
www.mytrapress.com
Lost-Small, timid, black female cat. White star on chest, blush face, long thin tail. Name
Fern
Lost: Male cat. 8 months old, gray, black tiger fur. Survived. 2014. In West Hill area. Reared and well, Fell
HELP WANTED
Now taking applications for waitress at fine
Lawrence, we offer an internship in the
preferment of summer, and next school year.
Applicants must be attractive and enjoy working
with people. Gratuitous excellent. Phone 842-
356-1234.
ADMINISTRATIVE DIRECTOR, KUU. Pull staff from 8-13, Admin. abilities responds back. Lab 8-13-73. Admin. abilities responds back. Lab 8-13-73. Admin. abilities responds back. Submit resume by July 29th. Community affairs schedule
MOTHER'S HELPER: Age 18-22, September-
born. Req. board and salary. Mrs. Ritchie
Ronald, B.C., educator; Mrs. Mike
Ryan, B.C., educator.
MISCELLANEOUS
PIZZA HUT DELIVERS: A hot pizza right
to bed for $10.95, or Saturday at 10:
3 p.m. pizzeria 643-704-784.
Employment Opportunities
AVON CALLING-II can be you. Sell during AVON CALLING-II hours. Call 215-843-8817, Mrs. Melia, Avon Area. Mail 215-843-8817.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
SERVICES OFFERED
RIVER CITY PARK SERVICE ASSOCIATION,
Bib Vermont, 841-4083. Customer service hours
Repair is a community of repair specialist sharks
covering and cleaning all areas covered cover cleaning and overland of antique and modern watches, clocks, typewriters, photographers, and other work that service what other replacements. 7-68