Volume 124 Issue 144
kansan.com
Friday, April 27, 2012
The Laws of Attraction WHY YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS JUST CAN'T AGREE ON JOHNNY DEPP
Chelsea Mullen, a sophomore trom Eudora, likes guys with facial hair. If he can make her laugh, she's putty in his hands. But, Mullen says, her friends just don't get it.
"Most of my friends like pretty boys who are overly groomed, and I don't think that's attractive in the least," she says. While Mullen and her friends might be at odds over it, science has proven that there are characteristics found to be most desirable in the opposite sex. A 2008 study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that red is the most attractive color to members of the opposite
sex. Another study done at the University of Texas found an ideal waist-to-hip ratio for women to be 0.7 - which represents a much smaller waist than hips. Various other scientific research has pointed to facial symmetry as being of high importance when it comes to attracting a mate. With these conclusions, can we assume that an ideal specimen exists?
Dennis M. Dailey, retired professor of the school of social welfare, says no. The basis of our attraction to other people is based on a attraction template that is formed as we grow older. Dailey says the preferences that make up this attraction
Everyone's attraction template is different says retired social welfare professor Dennis M. Dailey. PHOTO BY MORGAN LAFORGE
// SASHA LUND
template vary greatly from person to person, but we all have our type.
"If everyone had to be a stunning model that represented the thing men are attarcted to, we'd be in trouble. There are social standards that says what is or isn't beautiful, but that doesn't represent everyone's attraction template," Dailey says. Dailey says that experiences such as Mullen's are common, and because there is so much variance in attraction, it's impossible to determine what one person's attraction template is compared to another person's. Sexual attraction, however, Dailey says, is just one component of overall attraction - an umbrella term which includes values, intelligence, money, religion and power all as things we consider when evaluating someone's attractiveness. Our attraction templates, Dailey says, will alert us if a possible mate has enough of these qualities that we desire.
Everyone's attraction template is unique, Dailey says, so where does it come from? The answer is simple: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Our differences in attraction can stem from our parents, social learning from peers, or childhood sex play and fantasy. One thing is for sure though, Dailey believes: we aren't born with our templates.
Isadora Alman, a syndicated advice columnist and marriage and family therapist, agrees that while attraction is based on many things, it almost always starts out as something physical. She advises people to identify their physical triggers, and use them to their advantage.
"People have to cop to the fact that they have a penchant for redheads or great bottoms or something. That will make the difference of whether they'll talk to someone and get to know them," she says.
While physical attraction may be important for a new romance, Alman warns people that it may not always lead to a long-term relationship. She says sex appeal can be overridden quickly if someone says something offensive or unintelligent.
"Someone can look absolutely great, and then once they open their mouth, it's gone," she says.
Alman believes that, while there are many things a person can do to decrease their attractiveness to other people,the only thing a person can do to appear more attractive to the opposite sex is be friendly and be themselves.She says if you're looking to stand out from the pack, don't be self-concious and just reach out to someone.
"If someone is willing to smile and say 'hi,' they are going to make a wonderfully better first impression that is going to override any physical characteristics," Alman says.
Dennis Dailey agrees that little can be done to enhance your appeal to the opposite sex. He advises someone looking for love to be authentic and genuine, and love will find its way.
"I don't think you can dress yourself up to be attractive to someone of the opposite sex. No one needs to do anything extra. There are people out there who will find you attractive," he says.
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Documentary prompts race discussion in schools
Patrick Monroe, a senior from New Berlin, Wis., looks through a lens to focus a shot for his documentary. The documentary features the "Can We Talk" program at Free State High School, which focuses on racial issues in public schools.
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Sylvia Yimer, a graduate student in the School of Social Welfare, went to visit the program "Can We Talk" at Free State High School. "Can We Talk" is a localized part of a national program. Yimer said her visit was driven by her interest in race equality in public schools.
editor@kansan.com
A group of University students is producing a documentary called, "Courageous Conversations about Race," a program encouraging high school students to face racial issues.
Yimer said the program was meant to facilitate understanding of different races and reduce the academic performance gap between white students and students of minority groups. She said she was surprised by how unrecognized the program
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Monroe said it was great to know that Sylvia was as dedicated as he was to filming and directing.
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Last September, Yimer brought the documentary idea to a University student club, the Documentary Film Society. The student club was just established by then. The president of the club, Patrick Monroe, a senior studying film, was excited to hear about the idea.
"Film can be used to make change and be the outlet for voices that are marginalized to be heard," Yimer said. "These kids wouldn't get an opportunity to get their stories heard without someone giving that to them necessarily."
Yimer said Singleton was personable. The author set aside more than four hours of his day to meet exclusively with Monroe and Yimer.
was. Yimer decided to make a documentary to raise awareness of the program.
"Since we started, we were focusing on funding and didn't have
"It was easy to tell how passionate he was about his work and how eager he was to help us," Yimer said. "The interview with Glenn is by far the most important interview for the film."
All contents, unless stated otherwise, © 2012 The University Daily Kansan
The program is inspired by the book "Courageous Conversations about Race — a Field Guide for Achieving Equity in Schools," by Glenn Singleton and Curtis Linton. In February, Yimer and Monroe flew to San Francisco to interview and film Singleton.
"As a filmmaker, I hope this will be a calling card not just for me, for the club, but for KU." Monroe said. "We want to show people what KU students are capable of."
anything solid to work on," Monroe said. "Then Sylvia called me with this golden idea."
Monroe said a lot of work needs to be done to make the documentary successful and he hoped they could eventually send the documentary to film festivals. He hasn't yet announced a release date.
Monroe said the project would expand through the school year and develop into a 70-minute feature.
During spring break the team conducted an interview with a Free
State High School student who said to have benefitted from the program. Yimer said their next goal was to set up an interview with Tim Wise, one of the leading authors on race and racism in America.
Don't forget
Today is the Brown Bag Drag Show sponsored by SUA, Queers & Allies and Kicker. This is the last Tunes @ Noon of the year.
- Edited by Anna Allen
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Today's Weather
Showers and thunderstorms are likely, otherwise mostly cloudy.
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HI: 67
LO: 54
Don't get struck by lightning
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