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6B THEWHATEVER
WWW.KANSAN.COM
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN THURSDAY, JANUARY 24, 2002
KJHK plays eight hours of static
By Brad Weiner
Kansan satire writer
Lawrence's Sound Alternative broke another music industry norm last week when Melvin Marion, Lawrence junior, played an unprecedented eight hours of avant-garde static.
Static is currently skyrocketing in sales and is showing no signs of letting up.
"Some people can't tell the difference between the styles of static," Marion said. "There is really psychedelic static that comes from something like a walkie talkie. Then there's the composed static of an improperly tuned radio."
Marion described jazz static, blues static and electronic static, which is the most popular as it can be created by placing any metal product into a standard kitchen microwave."
Music industry experts have said static will reign the airwaves in another year.
"Static is the hot thing right now," said Andrea Crembroulet, Best Buy music clerk. "The market is really taking off, especially with the bands from Bangladesh."
Some critics aren't so sure. Rolling Stone criticized the music, calling it "talentless drivel." Other critics have been reluctant to call it music at all.
"Music is composed of rhythm, harmony and melody," said Marky Mark in an MTV interview. "Call me a traditionalist, but this noise
"Static is the hot thing right now. The market is really taking off, especially with the bands from Bangladesh."
Andrea Crembroulet
Best Buy music clerk
has none of those elements."
has none of those elements.
Frank Zappa couldn't be reached for comment because he died in 1993.
Contact Weiner at editor@kansan.com.
KIMBERLY THOMPSON/KANSAN
Jay Floersch, Fredonia senior and founder of The Static Experience, listens intently to JKH's static.
BRIEFLY
Jon Craiger, Wichita sophomore, said the new satire page in the University Daily Kansan is just wasn't funny.
"I didn't even laugh once," he said. "I could do so much better."
Student tells friends that Kansan satire page 'really sucks'
Johnson told friends he would start writing for the satire page, "as soon as they call me."
Other interested students may contact satire editor Matt Merkel-Hess by phone at 864-4810, or at mmerkelhess@kansan.com.
Salina adopts new tourism motto "We're east of western Kansas."
Satire page announces 'Name That Satire Page' competition
The winner will receive a free subscription to the Kansan and other fabulous prizes. Please submit, or we might just have to call it The Penguin or something.
The Kansan satire page needs your help. Soon. The page needs a name. Submit your ideas to mmerkelhess@kansan.com by Monday, Jan. 28.
INSIDETODAY
- Greek restaurants try new post-9-11 ads: 'Did you ever know that you're my gyros?' page 14R
- Dead things found at museum, page 1Metro
- Wescoe 'still ugly,' page 3C
'Oread' sex column fails to excite faculty, staff
By Adrian Zink Kansan satire writer
Provost David Shulenburger's attempt at a sex column has failed after a two-week stint in the University of Kansas faculty paper, Oread.
It appears the success of Meghan Bainum's sex columns in The University Daily Kansan eclipsed the excitement found in Oread.
Shulenburger's columns included "The joy of holding hands and taking a walk" and "Snuggling for dummies."
"I was just trying to get the teachers' minds off the raunchiness of the student sex column and give them something wholesome," he said.
The column actually had an adverse effect on Oread, dropping readership by 20 percent.
Jim Bendyknee, Oread representative
"We're working on a 'Dear Abby' type column where teachers write to the chancellor and ask him questions about how to deal with pesky in-laws and such," Bendyknee said. "We'll get our readers back."
said the failure of Shulenburger's sex column wasn't the end for the paper and new ideas were being circulated to boost readership.
One anonymous teacher said nothing would pull her away from the Kansan.
Shulenburger
"Without Bainum's column, my husband would continue to be a cold fish in bed," she said. "Now I don't even hate sex with him."
Contact Zink at editor@kansan.com.
Baby Jay in MIP melodrama
The KU Police Department reported yesterday that the beloved Baby Jay mascot was caught Saturday night consuming alcohol at what appeared to be a party.
Sgt. Mike Badlow of the KUPD gave Baby Jay the citation.
Baby Jay was issued a minor in possession citation because the bird is not yet of drinking age. Although Baby Jay was born in 1971, he's "still just a kid," said Big Jay.
"I noticed Baby Jay's big yellow beak
as soon as I walked in," he said. "I asked him if he had beer in his cup. He just silently waved and smiled. I asked him a second time, and he just gave me a thumbs-up and a hug, so I busted him."
This was not Baby Jay's first run-in with the law.
POW IT 9999 SPORTS We Buy, Sell & Trade USED 841-PLAY & NEW Sports Equipment 1029 Massachusetts
In October of 1999, he was arrested and put on six months' nest arrest for paying the Nebraska Cornhusker to beat up Willie the Wildcat.
Adrian Zink
Supportive Educational Services http://www.clas.ukans.edu/services 864-3917 7 Strong Hall
Free Tutoring
• academic advising
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• workshops
• resource library
Redefine Your World
With a sense of
With a sense of adventure and the desire to help others help themselfs, you can redefine your world... and yourself. Peace Corps has international programs in environment, health, business, education agriculture and more.
Learn more:
THURSDAY, JANUARY 24
Information Table
12 pm - 4 pm
Kansas Union, 4th floor lobby
Film Show 7 pm Multicultural Resource Center 1530 Summerfield Hall Drive
(800) 424-8580 www.peacecorps.gov
TICKETS HALF PRICE for KU STUDENTS
Friday, January 25, 2002 - 7:30 p.m.
This Montreal-based, folk-music band is known for its exceptional harmonies, virtuoso musicianism and incendiary live performances!
Tickets on sale at the Lidder Center Office (785) 6843 AND via our website, ldu.ku.edu.
ticketmaster
(016) 723-4567
(016) 723-4568
(016) 723-4569
Weekly Specials
Tear this out and pin it up all week so you'll never miss a special!
BADA BING
$1 Bud/Bud Lt. Live dancing
*See Club for Details
BAMBINO'S
$3 Martinis
CADILLAC RANCH
$1 big beers &
$1double wells
HARBOUR LIGHTS
Cajun Menu and $1.50 u-call-its
$2.50 import bottles
JACK FLANIGANS
JET LAG LOUNGE
$2 wells, $3 doubles, $2 domestic bottles, $2 shots!
$2.00 Jaeger shots Live dancing
$2 jumbo(32 oz)
margaritas
J. B. STOUTS
Parliament $2.91 per pack everyday price
$2.50 pitchers, $2 wells,
retro night/ No cover all night
SATURDAY
$1.50 Miller High Life bottles
$3.00 22oz. Rolling Rocks
Seafood Menu,
2 and over night
$3 jumbo (32 oz) Bahama
Mamas
$2.00 Jaeger shots Live dancing
Glass Night - you keep the glass and get cheap refills
TOBACCO EXPRESS
$2 domestic bottles
$1 anything
$9.75 KC Strip dinner
$3 Stoli drinks
$2 micros and imports
$2.00 Rolling Rock longnecks
$4 pitchers,
$1.50 house shots
$1.00 Bud/Bud Lt.
Live Dancing
$2 domestic bottles
Wine & Cheese Night - 1 wine is featured with an entree
Stu's
$2.75 Boulevard pints
Amateur Night Live Dancing
$2.50 domestic bottles.
$3 import bottles
Skoal $3 per can everyday price
YACHT CLUB
$2.75 Boulevard pints
$2 Killian's Red and Bud Lite Schooners
$1 Bud/ Bud Lt.
Live dancing
TUESDAY
Phillies $2.40 for a 5-pack
$1 Busch & Miller H-Live care, $1.50
$1 dolm draws, $1.50 micro draws,
$2.75 dolm draws, live music
$1.75 premium draws
1/2 price potato skins
$2.75 Long Island Iced Tea
SIN Night, $1.50 domestic draws,$1 house shots
$3 pitchers, free burger bar,
$1.50 house shots, live bands
2-For-1 almost anything
$2 16oz draws
Bud/Bud Light, Mich. Lights
$1 Pabst Blue Ribbon pint
$4.75 doubles, live DJ,
$2.50 wells
$2.50 Fat Boy domestics
Closed
$3.25 16 oz doubles of Crown and Captain
$1.75 dom. bottles, $3.25 micro beer liters, $3.75 premium liters
WEDNESDAY
$1.50 domestic pints
$1.25 16oz draws
1/2 price 12 oz Big Burgers. $2 Boulevard Pints
$1.50 well drinks, $2 pints,
$2.25 margaritas
Boulevard Night!
$1 Pale Ale pints
$1 anything
No Cover for Ladies
Camel, Winston $2.81 everyday price
$2 wells,$3 doubles wells
$1.75 domestic big beers
$3 premium bottles, $2.75 call drinks, $4 double calls
5¢ Wings, $2 Big Beers
$1.75 domestic bottles,
$2.50 micro bottles
Marlboro $2.91 per pack
for more drink, food and entertainment specials with profiles of Lawrence's bars and restaurants.
$4 for 48 oz pitchers, $332 oz big draws, $216 oz draws, $110 oz draws
$1.50 pints,
$2.50 Big Ones (25 oz)
$2 all bottles, free pool
Newport $2.91 per pack everyday price
$2 wells, $3 doubles, 25c
wings, live music @ 9 pm
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