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Opinion
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
DAVIDSON: ECONOMICS OF DATING DONE RIGHT
COMING MONDAY
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2009
United States First Amendment
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Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
FREE FOR ALL
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To contribute to Free for All, visit Kansan.com or call (785) 864-0500.
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Is it just me, or is White Owl a little bit more reserved this
My roommate burned popcorn and hot firefighters came to save us. I'm going to start burning popcorn more after
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I came home after a hard day's work and found my roommate watching "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"; WTF, 'mate?
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Recently my friend's been going around saying "Gay love," he watches soccer constantly, and he's a liberal Democrat. Am I supposed to assume that he's gay? I don't know. You be the judge.
To the roommates who found the phone at the Union: Free for All isn't the answer.
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Someone just threw a cigarette butt on the ground right next to an ashtray. Come on people, keep our campus clean
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The most valuable thing I've learned in college so far: Don't hook up with someone who lives in the same dorm as you. It makes for one hell of an awkward elevator ride.
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My roommate's constant 2 a.m. boots calls are really disrupting my beauty sleep.
To the girl in my HSES class:
I know what you're thinking
and I'm thinking the exact same thing.
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To the sack of crap who maliciously broke my car mirror last night: You dropped your keys and they'll be returned as soon as you pay for the damages. I'm in apartment C. Man up and don't be a coward.
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To the frat guy at Wescow: Stop crying about your Sperrys getting wet. They're boat shoes.
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I wonder what it be like to have sex while wearing a Snuggie.
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PAGE 5A
If anyone finds a red spotted tadpole flashlight keychain: his name is Elmer, he lives in GSP, and he is sadly missed.
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To my philosophy professor,
Stop showing up seven minutes late every day and giving me hope that we will have no class.
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To the girl in my Italian class:
Be my Valentine? Signed,
the guy who stares at you all
during class.
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Anyone else going speed dating?
EDITORIAL BOARD
What (definitely) not to do this Valentine's Day
W whether you love it or hate it,whether you're single.
dating, straight, gay, asexual or somewhere in between, here are 20 things NOT to do on Valentine's Day.
1. If you're in a relationship,
don't forget that V-Day is
tomorrow. For anyone who did,
Hallmark is located at 2329
lowa — they're open until 8
p.m.
2. Do not attempt to go to the residence of your unrequited love and stand outside his or her window holding a boombox above your head playing "In Your Eyes" by Peter Gabriel. It's been done.
3. Do not give your significant other a pen as a gift. Even if you think it's cool that it writes upside down or underwater or in outer space.
4. If you are attempting to burn all of the leftover stuff from your ex, make sure you are in a well-ventilated area. We suggest not burning anything that cost more than $50. Unless you were cheated on.
5. Do not plan a date that revolves around video games, even if it is the Nintendo Wii.
If you find yourself on a video game date, do not stay on it just
because you don't want to be alone on Valentine's Day.
6. Do not attempt to play a musical instrument you have no previous experience with in front of someone else because you think it might be romantic
7. Find out whether your valentine is allergic to chocolate, because you could wind up looking like an idiot or in jail for manslaughter.
8. Just because it's a movie now does not mean that girls really like hearing. "He's just not that into you."
11. Do not attempt to find out whether replacing sex with chocolate actually works. After 25 bonbons, it's time to stop.
9. Don't let anyone convince you to not use a condom because it's a "special occasion."
10. If you really can't stand your significant other, we suggest waiting until Sunday to break the news.
12. If you go on date, do not talk about how much you love your mom or how much you love Miley Cyrus.
13. Do not give your significant other a coupon book for "Insert your name here lovin."
14. Do not take 20 pictures of your date and yourself and
then make a photo album on Facebook that night. Enjoy the evening. Do not attempt to leave romantic wall posts — they are obnoxious, not endearing.
15. Do not attempt to write a love sonnet, Billy Shakespeare said it all about 400 years ago, and he will laugh at you because yours will be bad.
16. If you really need advice about your upcoming big date or want to talk about how well it went afterward, do not call your only single friend.
17. If you're going to cook, do not attempt to make anything with a name you can't pronounce.
18. Do not show up to your date drunk. If you do get drunk, do not drunk-dial your ex.
19. The fact that it's V-Day does not mean you get to hook up, make out or just get it on in public. Standard PDA rules still apply. And remember, the person who chose to ignore number 15 could be around.
20. Do not text someone to tell them "Happy Valentine's Day." If you do, you are lame.
RELATIONSHIPS
— Caitlin Thornbrugh for The Kansan Editorial Board
BEN COLDHAM
Technology tramples romantic relationship
With Valentine's Day coming up, I find myself more inclined
In a world where technology has become our No. 1 means of communication, people are starting to forget real social skills. I find it hard to believe that couples who met through an Internet venue such as Facebook or MySpace possess any real ability to partake in a face-to-face conversation with each other successfully. I cannot imagine the awkwardness one would feel during the first date in person, or the difficulty of expressing one's self verbally after hiding behind a computer screen. Online dating gives a false impression of what the relationship scene
to consider the possibility that romance is in fact a dying art. Technology seems to be killing off, or replacing, all creativity and thoughtfulness that used to be associated with Valentine's Day. It has become acceptable to substitute hand-written cards or valentines with a simple text message or e-mail, and it's becoming quite common to send party invites via Facebook. I admit that technology is more convenient and often less expensive, but are we really willing to give up romance to fit our busy schedules?
THE
'FRESH'MAN
PERSPECTIVE
truly is like.
Furthermore, communication with the opposite sex by way of technology is just plain confusing, especially early in a relationship. It is hard to decipher the tone in a text message or e-mail and difficult to distinguish a serious comment from a sarcastic one. Texting allows us to send brief, bland messages that actually say nothing at all, whereas at least in phone conversations we can tell whether people are sincere. Women in general would much rather hear, "I love you" than see it typed, "I luv u," in that ridiculous excuse for the English language. I personally would be more appreciative of a handwritten note like the ones we passed back and forth in middle school than of a three-word text or Facebook message. Hell, write it in purple ink with little doodles all over it, as long as it is made personal and shows that it took more than three seconds of your time.
ANN WILSON
I would like to say optimisti-
cally that the decline of romantic interaction is simply a generation thing. But, sadly, our parents' generation is partaking in this style of communication, or lack thereof, as well. I was horrified when I heard one of my professors telling the class about his plans to send his wife an e-card for Valentine's Day. If that is all I have to look forward to in 10 to 20 years, you can count me out.
There is definitely a place in today's world for technology and it seems to be growing with each passing day. I agree that it is the fastest and most efficient way to relay messages, but communication with your loved ones through technology is damaging the intimacy or personal interaction that should be present in every relationship. Valentine's Day is supposed to be devoted to celebrating our love for others. Everybody likes to feel special and appreciated every once in a while, so at least for one day out of the 365, communicate without that Blackberry messenger and make a real effort to bring some romance back into your life.
Wilson is a Hutchinson freshman in journalism and English.
STUDENT LIFE
Don't let the haters ruin your V-Day love
A lot of people hate Valentine's Day, both those who are single and those who are part of a couple. Anti-Valentine's Day celebrations seem to be on the rise, with events, parties and even cards. The reason seems clear enough: When you're single, especially recently so, there's nothing more stomach-turning than watching a parade of couples all staring deeply into each other's soul. They read lines to each other from romance novels while buying up a year's supply of flowers, chocolates and teddy bears bigger than a flat-screen TV. All this is for the purpose of making their partner even more disgustingly in love with them.
And for those in a couple facing their first or 50th celebration with their significant other, things can seem just as ghastly. The pressure to shell out an entire month's worth of beer money on one of the previously mentioned obnoxiously large teddy bears can make any relationship seem high-maintenance. Even the plainest of dates can involve a plethora of expected presents, a nice dinner out and a movie. But the expense of the night isn't the harsest part — you're also expected to be romantic.
On any given Saturday evening, one might feel a little worn down after a hard day at work or a stressful week. But, like it or not, on Valentine's Day we're expected to shape up and be a loving, romantic and passionate better half.
I understand all the objections, but I have a secret: I love Valentine's Day.
Valentine's Day is what a holiday should be; it's a break from normal, everyday life. It's a celebration of someone you love.
It's the one day I can be mushy with my boyfriend in public. I can go out to a nice restaurant with one hand holding his across the table in a gooey show of affection without the rest of the restaurant gagging on their dinner because we are being just a nauseatic cute couple. It's just expected. The people who don't want to see it don't go to low-lit, fancy Italian restaurants on Valentine's Day.
It's also the one day of the year devoted to showing our love to each other. Besides, romantic dinners for the cash-lacking college couples usually amount to a quick bite at a fast food restaurant where romantic is not having to hand-wash the silverware afterwards.
The day does come with a lot of high expectations and a lot of disappointments, but with the right person it can be a wonderful memory. Singles don't have to miss out on all the hearts and flowers, either. Growing up, Valentine's Day meant dinner out with my family and cards from friends and classmates. I celebrated with the people I loved and cared about. Valentine's Day love doesn't have to be about romantic love, just about love. The holiday may be largely commercial, but the people in your life are real and true. So take the excuse and celebrate someone you care about.
Clossin is a Wichita sophomore in education.
FROM CONNECTICUT
JOHN BAILEY The Daily Campus U. Connecticut
Valentine's Day has me red in the face
I hate Valentine's Day Can you blame me? Depending on your particular misanthropy, Valentine's Day is either a commercialized greeting card nonevent, or a day to com-memorate your eventual lonely, unmourned death. Or, you just have to eat those sawdust candy hearts, which apparently no longer speak proper English and, instead, say things such as "UR COOL D8."
Valentine's Day is such an obvious load of buffalo leces. It's just food, candy, hugs, smiles and maybe some gross drink made with greenadine. It's another excuse to have some lurk party. It's a venue to show how much you care, or at least how many stuffed white Dachshunds embroidered with "I love you
THIS much, Valentine!" you're willing to pay for. I hate caring.
But it gets even worse if you're single. You have to go to even more parties. The last time I was at a Valentine's Day party, everyone was eating snacks, having drinks and talking! And some girl tried to kiss me! No, I'm not kidding, that's actually what she tried to do. I'm allergic to snacks! I'm allergic to kisses! This stupid crappy greeting card holiday isn't just a crass celebration of pointless consumerism, it causes my physical harm! Bart!
And don't get me started on the chocolate. Can you think of a worse thing to put in your mouth? No, you can't, because chocolate also shrinks your brain. True fact: every time you eat chocolate, your brain cells actually wither away like salted slugs.
— UWire
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