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University Daily Kansan/Friday, April17, 1992
OPINION
Cereals hit bowl-bottom with arrival of Urkel-O's
Heads up. The sky is falling. This week, one of the seven signs of Armageddon reared its ugly head in our local grocery stores.
The gullibility—if not stupidity—of U.S. children has hit rock bottom. And I can sum it up in one word.
Urkel-o's.
That is right, Jaleel White has his own cereal. The geeky star of "Family Matters" did not bother me when his suspect talent was limited to the 7 p.m. Friday time slot. I am usually not home, and I would never watch the program of my own free will. But I am as ashamed to admit that my own father thinks the kid is hilarious, as do millions of U.S. citizens hard up for weekend entertainment. Noooffense. Mom
In the early days of this inexplicable craze, I could avoid his whiny voice and bizarre apparel. But things have gotten ugly. First, there were the blatant attempts to put all the network's child stars together in one corny extravaganza, like "Camp Coucacamanga," one of the all-time worst
David Mitchell Staff columnist
movies made for television. Yes, I sat through that one with Dad too.
Then, God spare us, there was the Urskel doll, complete with high-water pants. But now I have to draw the line. Urskel-o'f, I admit, I have eaten some stupid cereals in my time. In junior high, I ate more than one box of disgusting Donkey Kong cereal just because there were baseball cards inside. In fact, I have three complete sets of the 33-card set of 1984 Ralston Purina super stars. At three cards a box, I don't even want to think about it.
And even now, I still indulge myself in childish and sugar-coated Fruity Pebbles every once in a while. They
take me back to my own simple childhood days when kid shows and cartoons might have been predictably silly but not totally inane. Sure, Pebbles are an exploitation of the "Flintstones," but at least the Stones are a television classic. As much as I love my nieces, in all honesty, watching today's Saturday morning cartoons with them is pure hell.
Network programming seems to get worse every year. With the rash of moronic kid fads, it might be wishful thinking to say that Urkel will eventually go away. "The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" and lip-syncing New Kids on the block take in millions of dollars a month in merchandise alone.
But I will keep the faith in U.S. youth for just a little while longer, and hope that Urkel-o's go the way of Donkey Kong cereal.
Of course, if Irkel o's come out with baseball cards, all bets are off.
David Mitchell is a DeSoto senior majoring in journalism.
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
KU's tenure system is flawed
Education would benefit if professors could specialize either in research or teaching
In order to continue KU's reputation as a research school and also to provide the best classroom instruction possible, the University should institute two tenure tracks for all new professors, one for research and another for teaching.
The University tenure system suffers from two problems. First, many professors would prefer to research and never set foot in a classroom. Second, many good professors are denied tenure because they choose to dedicate more time to class and interaction with students.
The system used by KU currently grants tenure based on a mix of 40 percent research, 40 percent teaching and 20 percent community service. However, by the admission of several professors, a much greater emphasis is placed on research. That is wrong. Whenever professors are forced to emphasize research
over teaching in order to secure their jobs, the students lose.
Students are tired of listening to professors whine about large class sizes and the horror of teaching when they could be doing important research. And they are equally tired of hearing about how the great classroom educators and communicators are fired because they did not place enough emphasis on research.
In the beginning, every new professor would be expected to contribute in both the classroom and at the research level. However, at the time for tenure consideration, if it is determined that a professor is a better researcher than teacher or vice versa, he or she could be placed on a modified track to encourage more work in his or her speciality.
No plan is insulated from modification and change. However, something of this nature should be established at the University of Kansas without delay. Publish or perish should not lead to the destruction of classroom education.
Perot is wasting his money
Stephen Martino for the editorial board
He may have used a small loan to create an enterprise, but he cannot do that for our country
What some people do for entertainment. Sensing the public's discontent with the Democratic and Republican presidential candidates, H. Ross Perot announced his intention to be the nation's savior in this election year.
By invoking all the requisite platitudes, such as, "the process attracts the wrong people," and "we must eliminate fraud, waste, and corruption." Perot has tried to enhance his outsider image and gain the support of fed-up voters criving out for new faces.
He must be attracting somebody: Perot claims that two million people have called to pledge support or to get information.
What these two million see is a mystery.
Perot is perhaps best-known for turning a $1000 loan into a millionbillion dollar enterprise. A feat, sure, but the notion that he can duplicate this, make the government one million times more productive, is stupid.
His ideas range from the crowd-pleasing drivel of stripping perks from Congress and the executive branch to the eccentricity of setting up a system where all major policy and budget issues would be decided by national vote, conducted via television.
He proposes to make the war on drugs a WAR on drugs, and promises to chop away at the federal deficit. He is either secretive or unsure about how he would accomplish these tasks. His favorite answer to questions about the specifics is no answer because it would take too long for him to explain it all.
Before he takes his place in history next to John Anderson, Perot will most likely spend $100 million in his campaign, only about 40 cents for every citizen. If he really were so wise with money, perhaps he would spend it on something else.
Martin Scherstuhl for the editorial board
Clinton needs honesty
The "Clinton was not a draft ddoger" editorial by Martin Scherstuhl was not only incorrect, but Scherstuhl states in the second paragraph, "Bill Clinton dodged the Vietnam draft for two months." By Mr. Clinton's own admission, he joined ROTC at the University of Arkansas because, "I had no interest in the ROTC program in itself and all I seemed to have done was to protect myself from physical harm."
What Mr. Clinton did was obtain a two-month deferment because of his promise to join ROTC, then as the Nixon Administration cut back on the draft and instituted a new lottery, Mr. Clinton submitted himself to the draft. Subsequently, Mr. Clinton drew a high enough number that allowed him to sit the war out. Why? Mr. Clinton has spent his entire adult life with one goal in mind, to be the president of the United States. With this in mind, Clinton stated in his letter to the ROTC, "I decided to accept the draft in spite of my beliefs for one reason: to maintain my political viability within the system." I have to admire Mr. Clinton's manipulation of the system, while tens of thousands of young Americans were dying in Asian jungles.
The issue is not whether Vietnam was a just war or whether opposing it was wrong. The issue is integrity — if you opposed the war (as Mr. Clinton did and does not deny it) and did things to keep from going, then don't deny it. I would have more respect for him if he would simply come clean. The same thing can be seen when Mr. Clinton was asked whether he ever
used drugs. He stated that he never violated any state or federal laws — nice political answer, because it does not answer the question. When asked whether he ever violated international drug laws, he admitted to using marijuana while in Britain. Again, the real issue is not drug experimentation (which many youths go through) but simple honesty when asked a question. If you don't like the question then don't give an answer.
Letter to the editor
Travis Carlisle Lawrence sophomore Petty politics entrap us
Vision and Unless may have professed to be running a "grass-roots campaign, seeking change for the students," but since when do campaign promises mean anything? From an existentialist viewpoint, it doesn't matter which coalition won, because neither would be
Man is a political animal, or so the cliched quote usually goes. We are all entrapped in our naive world of petty politics and obsequious mannerisms that serve little but to effect personal gain. While Bill Clinton didactically screams, "Change!" from beneath the guise of a responsible, mainstream, "I've (never) really smoked pot" U.S. citizen, and while Edmund Brown screams, "Change!" from beneath the guise of an irresponsible, student-pandering, "I love to smoke pot" U.S. citizen, I am sickeningly reminded of the silly politics and all-too serious nature of our Student Senate elections this year.
more effective than the other, and the outcome would still breed ineffectual leadership. Experience or inexperience was not the issue. Student Senate will continue doing nothing but the bare minimum to insure that the same ineffectual "experience" will be elected next year and that the same breeding farm of political animals, popular politics and sycophantic voteeliciting (i.e. accosting students on the sidewalk with fiery red buttons and brilliant rhetoric like, "Dude, vote!") will continue. "Twas always thus, and always thus will be."
Kelly Dunkelberger
Canon City, Colo., sophomore
Hoch not worth price
I am utterly appalled at the horrendous waste of money Gov. Finney and the Board of Regents have proposed. I refer to the decision to spend $18 million to rebuild Hoch Auditorium.
At the University of Kansas, the future leaders of the industrial world are required to pay an outrageous fee for the privilege of being engineering students. Professors are leaving KU like rats from a sinking ship in search of a college that really wants to have them. And God help any unfortunate student who has to enroll in a Western Civilization class.
In this climate of financial famine, is it really wise to spend $18 million to rebuild a structure whose function could be more than replaced by a building one-third the cost. Although a $6 million concrete-and-steel building might not look
as pretty or be "architecturally correct," it would more than suffice. KU should be an institution of learning, not a tourist attraction. If I wanted to look at impressive (and expensive) architecture I would have gone to Italy (and someday will), but right now I want to receive an education, and to that end I can think of much better uses for $18 million.
Darren Nolen
Eudora junior
Sexuality not a choice
I am writing regarding Julie Litt's editorial of April 1, "Jeans aren't a basis to judge." Litt's sensitivity to the oppression gays, lesbians and bisexuals can experience on campus is laudable, as is her appreciation of the dignity with which they most frequently respond. Despite her compassionate and good-spirited editorial, however, Litt seems not quite to have grasped the character of "Wear Blue Jeans Day" and GALA Week. She frames it as "a time to fight ignorance with listening." Had Litt listened more carefully to what lesbians, bisexuals and gays say and write about their sexual histories, she would have heard them report discovering, as do heterosexuals, their sexual orientation — a fundamental of their makeup. Discovery is wholly different from some imagined process of choosing a sexual preference. By distorting through inappropriate word choice this fundamental developmental process in human experience, Litt, I am sure, contributed inadvertently to the very sort of ignorance that she opposes and which fuels oppresion of sexual minorities.
Geoffrey Steere Faculty adviser to GLSOK Local drivers are fine
I am responding to David Mitchell's comments about Lawrence drivers. Lawrence is considered a utopia by some people. It is a well-known fact that in the summer, when the majority of students have gone elsewhere, Lawrence is a more calm and peaceful place. Then every August, just like clockwork, the students come back, and this town becomes a jungle. It's as if people forget how to drive over the summer. Or maybe it is because students have been driving in places like Chicago, home of the all-time worst drivers in the world, or maybe Johnson County, whose drivers are unaware of things like red lights, yielding to other vehicles, and basically other cars. So they come back from these car-eat-car places and drive on Lawrence streets. You don't have to be Mario Andretti to drive in this town. It's a small town. We know it when students are gone. Just be a little more polite on our roads. We live here more than five years. So, I'm saying you are wrong. It's not Lawrence drivers who are bad. It's the people who are only renting this town for a few years. P.S. What ever happened to walking?
Lori Stockhammer Secretary, School of Law
KANSANSTAFF
TIFFANYHARNESS Editor
VANESSA FUHRMANS Managing editor
TOM EBLEN General manager, news adviser
Editors
News     Mike Andrews
Editorial   Beth Randolph
Planning    Lara Gold
Campus    Eric Gorski/Rochelle Jones
Sports    Eric Nelson
Photo     Julie Jackson
Features    Debbie Myers
Graphics    Aimee Brainard/J Jeff Meesey
JENNIFER CLAXTON Business manager
JAYSTEINER Retail sales manager
JEANNE HINES Sales and marketing adviser
Business Staff
Campus sales mgr      Blair, Bengooden
Regional sales mgr     Rich Husharbarger
National sales mgr      Scott Hamna
Co-op sales mgr      Anne Johnson
Production mgrs       Kim Wallace
Lea Keeler
Marketing director    Kim Clinton
Creative director    Learning
Classified mgr      Chip Chin
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by David Rosenfield
Stick