4 Friday, March 11, 1994 OPINION UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN 237 VIEWPOINT Having fun during Break does not require alcohol Spring Break will be a time for many students to release their pent-up frustrations from the semester. However, students should be cautious to distinguish between pleasure and unnecessary risk. Greeks Advocating Mature Management of Alcohol (GAMMA), Promote Alcohol Responsibility Through You (PARTY) and Watkins Memorial Health Center will present Safe Break Week to emphasize the need to behave responsibly throughout the break. The theme of the week and of the groups is not one of abstinence and no alcohol. These groups promote responsible behavior. GAMMA will begin the week Saturday with the Slam 'n Jam fundraiser for Saferide. Other GAMMA events include the Mock tail Contest in which students come up with the best tasting nonalcoholic beverage, such as virgin margaritas. The "Studs" competition, modeled after the television program, is another GAMMA event. Other Safe Break Week events include the distribution of free condoms in front of Wescoe Hall and a Watkins' "Hollywood Squares" rendition called "Sex Squares." In "Sex Squares," faculty and student leaders will be asked questions related to sex. PARTY and GAMMA will be passing out contracts promoting safe drinking during the break. These contracts ask students to promise to drink responsibly. Safe Break Week allows students the opportunity to understand that alcohol and having fun are not dependent upon one another. Spring break is a time to blow off steam and relax, but alcohol sometimes hinders that fun. At a time when students often are more likely to risk contracting HIV or receiving a DUI, it is important to drink responsibly. CHRISTOPHER LIVINGSTON FOR THE EDITORIAL BOARD Foreigners in Singapore are subject to its laws If people commit crimes, they should suffer the consequences. But the United States criticized Singapore for harshly sentencing an Ohio teenager, Michael P. Fay, 18, after he pleaded guilty to one count of possession of stolen property, two charges of vandalism and two charges of mischief. The sentence: four months in jail and six strokes of a cane. Caning is a punishment in which a martial arts expert flogs the prisoner with a water-soaked rattan cane. Ralph Boyce, a U.S. charge d'affaires, criticized the decision on the basis that Fay is a first-time offender and that his punishment does not fit his crimes. Fay's actions clearly were wrong. It is just as illegal in the United States to steal and vandalize as it is in any other country. Fay's possession of stolen property and vandalism are illegal in any country: This isn't a matter of laws specific only to Singapore. He knew that his actions were wrong. Although he is a first-time offender, he committed more than one crime. The U.S. Constitution protects against cruel and unusual punishment, but Singapore's laws do not. Canning is not considered cruel and unusual in Singapore because Singapore's culture has its own standards of law and order. If people from other countries kill U.S. citizens, they could be sentenced to life in prison. If their native country holds the belief that life in prison is cruel and unusual punishment, we do not let murderers go free to appease their country. Fay committed his crimes in Singapore. He broke the law, and he should suffer the same punishment that a citizen of Singapore would for the same crimes. AMANDA TRAUGHBER FOR THE EDITORIAL BOARD ESPN does its awards show the way they are meant to be done I have finally discovered something positive to write about. And not surprisingly, it involves two of my passions — sports and television. I'm talking about the American Sports Awards Show, better known as the ESPYs, shown Feb. 28 on ESPN. In an effort to show positive appreciation for this event, I'm here to share with you the top five reasons why I think that the ESPYs is the finest awards show on television. 1. A humorous host. As far as hosts of award shows go, Dennis Miller is the real deal. He was in top form throughout the evening, taking shots not only at those sports figures in attendance but at individuals and organizations with seemingly no connection whatsoever to the event. In the course of the show, he got digs in against everyone from people of Irish descent to the Mormon Church. And even when telling a simple joke, he failed to lose humor (Christian Slater and MTV, are you listening?) Miller showed genuine excitement and pleasure in his work, the perfect antithesis of the boring. stone-faced individuals who so often host award shows with an overdose of seriousness. 2) The winners actually show up. 2) The winners actually show up. Only two winners were not present to receive their awards; both Mario Lemirem and Charles Barkley were on the road with their respective teams. It's refreshing to see sports figures who make millions of dollars take one night out of their busy schedules to accept their awards with pride and thanks. I've grown so tired of the many actors and musicians who seem to find these acts of appreciation a waste of time. In this era of meaningless statements released through public relations departments, it was nice to see words come from the heart of each athlete, coach and every other recipient. 3) No "message" speeches. We've all seen it, someone wins an award, steps on stage and immediately asks the viewing audience to boycott General Electric, save the whales or devote their time to some other "worry" cause. I'm so sick of famous people trying to push their beliefs and causes on me, as if their request carries more importance than if my roommate requests the same. Instead of laying messages upon us, the average ESPY winner thanked God, teammates and family members and wished the audience an enjoyable evening. That's the way acceptance speeches should be. 4) David Letterman. Any show that invites Letterman to present an award not only has a great sense of humor, but guts, as well. By pairing Letterman with the "Race Driver of the Year" award, in light of Letterman's recent problems with traffic violations, the people who run the ESPYs created the perfect atmosphere for him to work his comic magic. And perhaps most important is the fact that both Letterman and Miller have shown us that athletics can be laughed at, that each sport is only a game. 5) Charles Barkley vs. Barney the Diposaur. Only in the ESPYs could Barkley win an award for trashing Barney, the purple childhood friend, in a game of one-on-one. As part of a "Saturday Night Live" skit, Barkley not only brought more laughter to the sports world by taking a humorous look at his bad-boy image, but he added to the increasing popularity of athletes starring in the entertainment field. Now, let's do a little addition. The ESPYs have Miller, Letterman and many of the world's finest athletes. It sounds like a formula for success. If the people of ESPN can just lose Barney, they'll have an American classic! Scott Titlington is a Poway, Calif. sophomore in journalism and exerciesscience. Surgery may take bite out of Break All you have to do is look around to see the signs of spring. The sun is out regularly, class attendance is becoming sparse, and my neighbor finally has decided to throw out his Christmas tree. And with these signs come thoughts of Spring Break. Mind you, turning on the garbage disposal may remind people of Spring Break, as well. Frankly, at this time of year, most anything, including those ridiculous Mentos commercials, could remind people of Spring Break. Now, I know that some of you already have break plans that entail going to some remote lodge and strapping big hunks of wood to your feet and falling down in the snow while the rest of you will probably trek off to the beach and endure an onslaught of residents asking you if we have sand in Kansas. Me, I'm doing neither. Apparently, the God of Screwing With Plans deemed this a good time for my bottom teeth to start the overlapping process because of the emergence of some objects in my mouth, namely wisdom teeth, installed there So I've finally decided to have this business taken care of, and for the life by the God of Superfluous Body Parts. My dentist said that I should have these teeth removed at the earliest opportunity. Of course, he started saying this when he learned that my mother was pregnant with me. This must be one of the first things they teach you in dentistry school: "No matter what the patient's actual condition is, you must urge them via weekly reminders with authentic facsimiles of your signature that, unless wisdom牙齿 are removed within the next two hours, the patient's head most likely will explode." of me, I couldn't think of a better time to do it than during Spring Break. But just because I'm going to be on my back looking as if i was a squirrel that just swallowed a cabbage, that doesn't mean that I'm not going to be having fun. And just to put you at ease, I think I'll share a sampling of my proposed Wisdom-Toothless Spring Break Extravaganza. DAY ONE: I'll return to my house in Topeka with four new holes in my mouth and try to resist playing with the stitches — if they're necessary. Incidentally, that reminds me of a story about a friend of mine whose wisdom teeth were so far embedded in his gums that his dentist had to make use of some alien death ray that actually SHATTERED his teeth into small pieces, which the dentist then later picked out. I'm hoping this procedure is no longer legal. DAY TWO: Having watched several commercials for accident lawyers that are interrupted by short, spontaneous bursts of actual programming. Iprobably will try perfecting this card trick that I've been working on for some time called the "False Dovetall Shuffle." The premise of this trick is to create the illusion that you are performing a normal stack shuffle, though in actuality what you are doing is spewing the cards clumsily all over the table, causing everyone to stare at you and sigh loudly. At least, that's how I've been doing it. DAY THREE: By now, I should be feeling well enough to slam my head repeatedly against the wall because it is Spring Break and I'm in Topeka, Kansas. I'm not going to be bitter about this situation. Spring Break comes and go, but you are going to have your teeth for the rest of your life. So I'm actually almost happy that I'm finally having this done. And to my friends, who are gallantiving off to who knows where, I have this to say. Forget the postcards, just send codeine. Scott Agis is a Topeka sophomore in jou- nallam. KANSAN STAFF BEN GROVE, Editor LISA COSMILLO, Managing editor TOM EBLEN, General manager, news adviser BILL SKETT, Systems coordinator BILL SKEET, Systems coordinator Assistant Managing Editor...Dan England Assistant to the editor...J.R. Clairbone Assistant to the Managing Editor...Jess Deltaven News...Krist Fogler, Katie Greenwald Todd Saffert Editorial...Colleen McCain Nathan Olson Sports...David Dorsey Photo...Doug Husey Features...Rana Bennett Wires...Allison Lippert Freelance...Christine Laue Assistant Editors Associate Campus...Carlos Tojada Assistant campus/planning...Brian James Associate sports...Christoph Fuhmans Photo technician...James Wilcox Katte Greenwald Matt Hyddesan Sarah Nagl Reporters Dave Campbell Gregg Arturo Will Gunderman Joe Hander Mihail Leaker Copy Editors Cheryl Cadee Lz Chadwick Gerry Fey Andrew Gilman Kevin Hoffman Roberta Johnson Angelina Lopez Stephen Martino Frank McCleary Heather Moore Jamie Mumma Dennis Hall Anthony O'Connell Matt Siegel Cathleen Biechta David Stewart Gennifer Traill Susan White Jacob Arnold...Sara Bennett Courtney Bloemquist...Angle Cunningham Jack Flahier...Christoph Fuhrman Matt Gowan...Donella Heame Kent Hohlfeld...Wiffy Hurt Brian James...L. Kriger Jay Kosterter...Kathy Paton Amy Patton...Colleen Rykert Sanam Samaraisinha...Shan Schwartz Photographers William Alix ... Martin Altaedtena Valerie Bontrager ... Richard Devinki John Gamble ... Mollissa Lacey Tom Lairdinger ... Heather Olinn Jenny Zlener Kip Chin Joe Harder Designers Krafti Fogler Todd Foeller Kimberlv Crabtree ... Teresa Vezaze JENNIFER BLOWEY Retail sales manager JEANNE HINES JUSTIN GARBERG Business manager Sales and marketing adviser BILL THOMAS Production PAT BOYLE Business coordinator Business Staff Campus sales manager ... Jason Ebbey Regional Sales manager ... Troy Yawter National & Coop sales manager ... Rain King manualist manager ... Shelly McConnell Production managers ... Laura Guth Gretchen Koetterlinch Marketing director ... Shannon Roilly Creative director ... John Carton Classified manager ... Kelly Company Marketing manager ... Wing Chan Retail assistant ... Judith Stanley Creative assistant (photographer) ... Andrew Amone Zone Managers Chris Bottler ... JennFor Carr Camronon Death ... Dean Mortland Jason Kort Retail Account Executives Brigg Bloomquat ... Holly Boren Lora Cornell ... John Edward Justin Frascolino ... Carrie Gabbard Emily Gibson ... Meredith Hennung Eline Joseph ... Kristin Kovolak Amy Matheson ... Carrie Meeks Melissa Muttack ... Dan Godes Regan Overy ... Darin Reld Martin Ropp ... Alan Stiglic Todd Winters ... Janel Zellens Campus Account Executives Sh萍 Falevite ... Michelle Jacobs Anna Looper ... Mark Mastro Kim Witton Regional Account Executives J. J. Cook...Anron Kirby Jackie Nigre...Brian Platt Inters Chudy Ashamire ... Ed Connealy Nancy Easton ... Jennifer Hertung Elaine Joseph ... Michael Robbion Senate Seminarline ... Carolyn Schumm Matthew Shield ... Bryan Sheman Justin Wilot