76
The University Courier.
LITERARY.
DRINKING BOUILLONS
I sat amid the brilliant throng,
In the salon.
My cup was filled with stuff so strong
It could not there belong,—bouillon,
Yellow bouillon.
I sipped; then stared I firm and long Down the salon.
The bitter liquid boiled my tongue;
I let it boil not long,—bouillon,
Wretched bouillon.
My stay no more could I prolong In the salon.
I left; I bade the drink "so long,"
And may you long boil on,—bouillon,
Deadly bouillon!
—W. F.
One terribly solemn thought Comes to me o'er and o'er, Commencement is nearer today Than 'twas the day before.
I'm nearer father's farm,
And in my mind I see
The scads of hoeing and work
He always has for me.
I've put on style down here, And now I can't return, With a white cap and cane, To parent grim and stern.
Away with solemn thoughts,
I'll enjoy myself while I can
For in just six short weeks
I've got to face th' old man.
-M. S. U. Tiger.
THE TOTEM POLE.
"Oh, why don't the profs and the students agree!"
The Totem Pole asked of a neighboring tree.
"I'll answer," the tree condescendingly said,
When you truthfully tell: how your pony is fed;
Where is the fount of perpetual youth;
When will a newspaper publish the truth;
Why won't the law take a criminal's life,
Or political leagues discontinue their strife;
Why a millionaire's villainy ne'er sees the light;
Where is the Wandering Israelite;
Why is the wealth, perseveringly won
By the diligent father, consumed by the son;
Why the honest man failed, whereas opulence ran
To that oleomargarine groceryman;
Why books are ne'er edited by a librarian;
Why fight is the creed of the sturdy barbarian;
Why the Greek, though bankrupt from prayers to eternity,
Never abandons his cherished fraternity.
To all of these riddles, oh give me the key,
And I'll tell you why students and profs disagree!"
—R.E.
"All flesh is weak," the sage has said How great was his mistake; He never tackled, happy man Our boarding-house beefsteak.
A WARNING.
A number of youngsters came to this town to stay,
To go to school or study, or to pass the time away,
To gain new thoughts and make more brains, and wear nice clothes and all.
To go to church and lectures, and concerts great and small. And all us other fellows when the evenings work is done, We gather at the postoffice and have a lot of fun, And listen to them "jabbers" as their slippin' in and out, And the "Frats'll git you if you
Don't Watch Out."
Once there came a stranger here, who didn't know very much About the college ways and doin's, and all such, And was asking questions about how things was run, When some fellows "Spiked" him just to have some fun. They told him that the fraternity called "Delta Gamma Chi" Was just the thing for him to join, and gave their reasons why. And they gave him the 'niitation fore he knew what he's about And the "Frats'll git you if you
Don't Watch Out."
There came here once a fellow who thought him wondrous smart,
Who wanted to go in society but couldn't get a start,
And wondering what it was that seemed to keep him back,
He asked some "frat" to tell him what he lacked.
And so they took him in, and said, that "you are just our man."
Then it was at this time that the 'niitation began,
For they took him to the rain-barrel and plunged him in an' out
And the "Frats'll git you if you
Don't Watch Out."
—DePauw Verse.
EXCHANGES.
The May issue of the Young Men's Era in an article on "Christian Athletes" has the following to say about Hector Cowan, who has already made himself deservedly popular in Kansas University. A cut of Mr. Cowan accompanies the article.
"Old Hector Cowan," as Princeton boys affectionately dub him, is another grand specimen of a Christian athlete. He is a New York state man, and after preparing at Deleware Academy, Delhi, N. Y., entered Princeton with the class of 1885. A giant in stature, the eagle eyes of numerous coaches were soon fastened on Cowan, and he was initiated into the mysteries of foot ball. He is one of the few men who have played on five 'varsity teams, having been a member of every Princeton eleven from 1885 to '89 inclusive, two of them,'85 and '89 having been championship games. It is generally conceded that he is the best tackle who ever played the game. He was also a fine lacrosse player, having been a member of the two champion teams of '87 and '88, and an excellent base ball catcher. After his graduation from the seminary, he preached in Missouri, chiefly at St. Joseph, where he developed, out of a struggling mission, Hope Presbyterian church. The University of Kansas foot ball eleven received the benefit of his coaching in 1892, and he became so popular with student and faculty that he was invited to become college pastor and physical director—a most significant combination. He accepted, and entered upon his duties March 1.
The Round Table from Beloit College, Beloit, Wisconsin, is a recent exchange.
We congratulate the Midland upon their recent souvenir edition. This issue is a credit to Midland College.