UNIVERSITY COURIER.
7
farm and pack, uitious numerous there lepths saw, had popped, sliding straw wagon, one human
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woodland clear of conast, weination, it above any setus, but fume of
balsam fir. Birds caroled in every bush and bough, while a beautiful clear stream close by the cabin made the scene one of solitary grandeur. But alas for the cabin! it never had a door, and one third of the roof was gone, while the few logs that remained were warped and shrunken, and the boughs which once thatched the roof had fallen away. How to repair these breaks presented to me obstacles insurmountable, but my companions were old campers and saw nothing to cause alarm or anxiety.
The gentlemen improvised a tent outside, while we held the cabin, and to make it more secure against the intrusion of wild beasts, we covered the door with canvass. Our only weapons of defence were an ax, which the gentlemen took to themselves, leaving us the more formidable one—a case knife! Of course we felt secure and ready to challenge any enemy that might intrude.
Our camp fire was a brilliant affair, lighting up the surrounding hills, sending a cheering gleam within, through the many openings. I could not sleep, so I watched the weird light, and acted as general guard of the camp. Through the day we labored to make our roof more secure, but night came on, leaving the same ventilation unobstructed. While asleep I was suddenly awakened by something trotting across the roof, over our heads. Almost paralyzed with fear, expecting every moment to see some wolf, or I know not what, pounce down through the opening, I called to my sleeping companion, informing her that "some animal had just ran across the top of the cabin!" "O," said she, "it was only a mouse," and as quickly dropped off to "the land of nod."
The days were spent in delightful rambles, gathering wild flowers, mosses, etc., but at last the winds blew, the rains came, and beat upon our house, and it—leaked! Great was our surprise. The novelty and romance were over. Gladly we rallied our forces, broke camp, and sought our village home, and never did its comforts look more inviting.
SOUND IN A SEA SHELL.
In the January number of the UNIVERSITY COURIER I noticed the following article, pretending to prove the cause of the roaring sound heard when a sea shell is held to the ear:
"When a sea shell is held to the ear there is a vibratory sound which children assure each other is the roar of the sea. The sound is caused by muscles in the fingers which are in a high state of tension and whose fibres vibrate. The sound is communicated to the shell and intensified, as the hollow body of the violin intensifies the vibrations of its strings, and thus the acoustic nerve receives the impression. A similar but less intense sound than that which comes from the sea shell can be heard by simply placing the hand over the ear in a certain position."
Now I am not aware who it is that advances this theory; it may be, for aught I know, an ancient philosopher. But however that may be, it appears to me that the theory is false, from the fact that if the shell is laid on a table and the head so inclined as to bring it near the shell, the same sound can be heard, and as intense. Under these circumstances the sound is heard and the fingers are not in contact with the shell at all, proving conclusively to my mind that the theory is an incorrect one.
HOMER J. HENDRICKS.
A young English statistician who was paying court to a lady, thought to surprise her with his immense erudition. Producing his note-book, she thought he was about to indicate a love sonnet, but was slightly taken aback by the following question :
STATISTICS FOR GIRLS.
"How many meals do you eat every day?"
IOLA, Allen Co., Kan., Feb. 7, 1879.
"Why, three, of course; but of all the oddest questions—"
"Namely, love. I'll tell you all about it in a report."
Never mind, dear; I'll tell you all about it in a moment.
His pencil was rapidly at work. At last, fondly clasping her slender waist.
"Now, my darling, I've got it, and if you wish to know how much has passed through that adorable little mouth in the last seventeen years I can give you the exact figures."
"Now, just listen," says he, "and you will hear exactly what you have been obliged to absorb to maintain those charms which are to make the happiness of my life."
"Good gracious! What can that mean?"
"But I don't want to hear."
"Ah, you are surprised, no doubt; but statistics are wonderful things. Just listen. You are now seventeen years old, so that in fifteen years you have absorbed—oxen or calves, 5; sheep and lambs, 14; chickens, 327; ducks, 204; geese, 12; turkeys, 100; game of various kinds, 824; fishes, 160; eggs, 3,120; vegetables (bunches), 700; fruit (baskets), 603; cheese, 173; bread, cake, etc. (in sacks of flour), 40; wine (barrels), 11; water (gallons), 3,000."
At this the maiden revolted and, jumping up, she exclaimed :
"I think you are very impertinent, and disgusting beside, and I will not stay to listen to you!" upon which she flew into the house.
He gazed after her with an abstracted air, and left, saying to himself:
"If she kept talking at that rate, twelve hours out of twenty-four, her jaws would in twenty years travel a distance of 1.332.124 miles."
The maiden, within two months, married a well-to-do greengrocer who was not a statistician.
Hind, the actor, was once, as a desperate brigand, to escape from prison by means of a file and a rope ladder, and just as he got outside of the window, three soldiers, being on guard, were to rush up and fire upon him, and he was to fall dead. Out he got, according to the cue. Up rushed the soldiers, presented, and pulled trigger; but each piece missed fire. They fled in dismay, but instantly returning with other weapons, fired again with similar results, and the audience began to indulge in sinister manifestations; when Hind all at once fell to the ground, and with fearful groans and contortions dragged himself down to the foot-lights, exclaiming: "Great God! I have swallowed the file!" Then he gave some more writhes, uttered one long and hollow groan, and expired. The audience was appalled into satisfied silence.
The papers of St. Petersburg, Moscow, and other Russian cities with universities, contain many advertisements from students, offering their services as private teachers. Such advertisements often read thus : "A student, having no means whatever, prays for any kind of work, at any rate of remuneration." Many Russian students support themselves by giving lessons in the evening, and not a few of them live on the verge of starvation. There have even been cases of death by starvation among them.
Broke! broke! broke! and I have n't a single V,
I haven't a ten cent note: and that's what's the matter with me.
Ah, woe to the tailor man, that he waits so long for his pay!
Alas for the washwoman's boy, that he seeks me day by day!
The wealthy swells ride by in the omnibus up on the hill,
While I wade up through the graveyard mud. O woe! 'tis a bitter pill!
Broke! broke! broke! at the door of the bank I'll be,
If the tender grace of a check from home will only come back to me.
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