The Professor's Controversy.
Doctor Meek was professor in the North Wittenburg Medical College. During his long and useful career, his name had appeared in print on the title page of his "Surgical Anatomy of the Respiratory Organs" in the published reports of the American Association for the Advancement of Science; in the columns of the Scapel, and of a German publication devoted to medical science. No where else, so far as the professor knew or cared. He seldom read newspapers, or took much interest in the doings of the world at large; his whole life was taken up with scientific study, and the duties of his professorship.
One morning at the beginning of the recitation, Doctor Meek stated to his class that in his opinion, the germs of consumption do not attack both lungs at once, but begin operations on one lung, then cross over to the other, and then back to the first, and so on; that so far as he was able to judge, the right lung was invariably and, owing to the stricture of the lungs, necessarily the first one affected. When he made this remark, a junior, who felt better prepared to ask questions, than to answer them, said, "Then if a man had his right lung amputated before he had contr eed consumption, it would be impossible for him to ever have the disease, would it?"
Professor Mee's reflected a moment, and then answered the question in the affirmative. Before proceeding with the recitation, Professor Meek reminded his pupils that this theory was by no means demonstrated; that he had performed his experiments carefully as his medical knowledge would permit; but there were many discoveries yet to be made which would have much bearing upon the matter. He expressed the hope that some of his pupils would take up his experiments and with more years to live and work, and with a broader scientific knowledge, reach the unquestionable truth in regard to the question.
That day at noon in a restaurant at W ten ourg two medical students were eating lunch.
"Now," one of them was saying; "suppose this chunk of meat was a human lung. Suppose you cut it in two—so, I think you can see, if you look here, what the old man was driving at—" Much further talk of a similar nature ensured; the students illustrated their re marks by letting the various articles of food represent the different organs of the human body. At the same table sat Bilkins, a reporter on The Wittenburg Daily Yeller, trying to eat and devoutly wishing that the doctors to be would change the subject. As the conversation progressed, however, the word "theory" attracted his attention. He became interested. While he listened the medical students went over in detail, the whole of Professor Meek's theory as expounded that morning. The reporter took notes and asked questions. He knew that a "story," to be acceptable to his paper must be accurate. The next day the following appeared in the Daily Yeller:
"Cut out Your Right Lung! A college professor discovers a new cure for consumption. Says that consumption is all the right lung's fault. Mr. Meek, professor of mathematics and vocal music in the medical school near Wittenburg created something of a sensation this morning by declaring in the presence of his class that the only way to cure consumption was to cut out the right lung.
"You should all have your right lung amputated at once," exclaimed the professor, dramatically. "What business have you going around with two lungs?" Consumption threats to overwhelm our country. The right lung is the cause of it all.
"As the reader may anticipate, the doctor's remarks caused a stir. The student body is divided in sentiment. None of the trustees could be seen today. Professor Meek is a man about 65 years of age and is unmarried. The trustees meet next August."
Bilkins was much pleased to see his story printed in full. The city editor was lavish in his compliments.
"Why couldn't you have done this six months ago?" he demanded.
"That is the first decent story you've sent in since you came. Are you getting it through your abnormally thick skull that it's sensation—sensation, sir, that the people want, and that's the business of the Yeller to give them sensation?"
Bilkins was delighted. The other reporters were envious.
When Professor Meek's attention was called to the article he was astonished.
"Why,this is outrageous!" he exclaimed. "This is exasperating. That article in the Yeller is, to call it by no harsher name, a misrepresentation."
Then he began to wonder what he would better do. His first impulse was to write a letter to the Times, denouncing the Yeller as an unreliable paper. Then he decided to treat the Yeller and its article with
the silent contempt they deserved. Afterward he wondered if it would not be well to write a note to the Yeller stating that it had no doubt unintentionally misrepresented him. The result of all this was the professor did write such a note, but it seemed unsatisfactory to him; it seemed that a brief statement should be added, explaining his theory and his attitude toward it. After an hour of further thought and worry as to the proper course, Professor Meek began a brief, concise and simple statement of his views upon the attacks of consumption germs.
An editorial in the Scapel speaks of Doctor Meek as one of the best scientific writers in the English language. His book has been praised by physicians as remarkable for its clearness, accuracy and force. No doubt this praise is merited; but when Professor Meek abandons scientific terminology, and attempts an explanation in common English, the result is an incomprehensible maddie. He worked for three days on his simple concise statement and sent it to the Yeller.
Meanwhile the press, far and near, had taken up Professor Meck's supposed theory and made copy of it.
"Can't you turn in some more Meek story?" demanded the city editor of Bulkins.
So Bilkins straightway began the preparation of an interview with Professor Meeks.
"If I have time," he remarked to the city editor, "I'll go 'round and see the professor before this interview is printed."
"Bother going to see him," said the city editor. "Can't you write a little old interview without some college professor to help you? What do these professors know about journalism? You've said in the interview, I suppose, that Professor Meek, when seen by a representative of the Daily Yeller, reiterated his statement concerning disease germs; that he talks of his astounding theory quietly, as though it were the most common-place thing on earth; that in appearance the professor is a typical scientist."
"Yes," answered Bilkins, "that is just what I have said."
"Of course," responded the city editor, "what else could there be to say?"
The paper containing the interview was being printed when the professor's article reached the office.
"See here, Bilkins," said the city editor. "This Meek, the professor has sent in a contribution about ten columns long. He begins by casting reflections upon your veracity; then follows an explanation of his theory which, he says, can be understood by a man of the feeblest intellect. Read it and see what it means."
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The next day's paper contained under the caption, "Professor Neek Explains," a short, witty article from the versatile pen of Bulkins. The article treated the professor's explanation with withering sarcasm, and apologized for not printing the explanation in full "owing to dearth in the supply of paper." However, the most obscure paragraph from the professor's article was selected and published as a sample of the whole.
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The matter attracted ten times the notice which it had at first. People talked about it all over the country; the papers published news articles containing the facts, using the words in a journalistic sense, and some gave the subject editorial treatment. It was a favorite topic among funny paragraphers. Some of the country weeklies gave notice to the controversy. The Simpson county Torch of Liberty gave its version as follows: "A New York man has announced his intention to cut out his right lung, in order to show that organ to be useless." The Blankville Conservative informed a curious world that Mr. Meek living in Boston had both lungs removed and was still alive and in good health. The Prairieville Age to Come, whose editor was a scientist as well as a theologian and statesman, had the facts of the case stated as accurately as the dailies had, for it used plate. On the editorial page the matter was dismissed in the following language: "In our news columns will be found a statement of Doctor Meek's theory of consumption." In making the statement that the amputation of the right lung will cure constipation, the professor shows his ignorance. As is well known among medical men, consumption does not begin in the lungs at all but in the periosteum, a small organ at the root of the tongue. These college professors may be all right in matters of theory, but they should leave practical matters to practical men." A prominent Kansas daily made its usual discovery that Doctor Meck had once been proprietor of a grocery store in Leavenworth. The Divine Healer published the story of how Professor Meck had thought his right lung out of existence, and was engaged in thinking it back
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"Don't send in any more Meek stories" said the city editor to Bilkins.
So Bilkins hunted up a preacher who was about to be dismissed for conduct unbecoming to a clergyman, and made use of him for a new sensation.
Professor Meek called at the office of the Yeller, and, unfortunately, threatened to bring a libel suit. That evening the Yeller contained the following editorial.
"Professor Meek of a medical school near Wittenburg, who created such a sensation by his notions about consumption germs, threatens to sue the Daily Yeller if we do not print the letter he sent to us several days ago. He thinks he can collect a large sum in damages. Professor Meek's knowledge of the law is evidently as profound as his knowledge of medicine. The secret of the whole thing is, that Professor Meek belongs to that class of college professors, now growing very large, who have a mania for getting their name before the public. We would advise the trustees of the North Wittenburg Medical College, for the good of the school, to grant Professor Meek a leave of absence, and one without a limit, in order that he may devote his entire time to his favorite occupation—breaking into the newspapers.
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