1.3.2.3
Charley's Mistake.
Charley always ate two dishes of rolled oats for breakfast, and perhaps this gave him the healthy infant look that suggested the name of "Mellin's Food boy." The landlady appeared to love him fondly, he was "such a nice boy," until one day his knowledge of chemistry overcoming his discretion, be asked for the "acetic acid," and then love gave place to resentment.
"Look hurt!" she exclaimed, "the 'ain'
no acid in my vinegar. I'll let you know."
He was a handsome fellow with big soft brown eyes, the kind that sparkle with love lights and rest with lingering fondness. Doubtless' the fondness lingered longest when Charley stood before his mirror. His mouth was small, but his lips were full with a tendency to tremble. His pretty cheeks were ruddy and downy, and his beautiful smooth white forehead showed no wrinkles or other suggestion of character. He had a habit of cutting short the important words in his conversation, lingering over the prepositions and conjunctions in a Christian Endeavor drawl, and inserting an irrelavant 'you might say' at frequent intervals. Evidently he was mamma's pet and mamma had taken great care that the rough horrid world should have no influence upon his earlier education. He came from one of the numerous small but hopeful colleges that have been scattered thoughtlessly over the state, and he had expected to enter the senior year. In his opinion his grades entitled him to that standing; but owing to the stubbornness of the registrar and to that disagreeable person's lack of ability to discern the embryonic genius that comes before him, Charley was obliged to enter the Junior class.
However, Charley felt that he would have just that much more time to make himself prominent in Kansas university. Indeed he has already succeeded in bringing himself to the notice of the students, especially since they had heard how he returned from the Thanksgiving football game. Charley graciously took upon himself the care of his cousin that she might see the great game. She was a meek little Freshman girl, a rather plain and reticent child, who had been taught to look upon Charley as a paragon whose value was perhaps not fully understood outside of his own family. They returned from Kansas City Friday afternoon, and their Uncle Fred, who was under the suspicion of entertaining certain unexpressed doubts in regard to the paragon, a compounded them to the Union depot.
"There, their taking down the sign," said Charley, as they came out upon the platform after taking leave of Uncle Fred. "That train's going to leave first. Hurry up we'll get on."
"But Charley," protested his cousin, this sign says this one is for Lawrence."
"That's all right. Aint they both Santa Fe trains? See the letters on the cars. That one's going first. Don't I know?"
She had always been taught that he did know, and they walked toward the train that was ready to start.
"There, it's going, hurry up."
They had barely enough time to climb on the rear platform as the train began to move. It was a sleeping car, the door was locked, and Charley did not know about the push button that is placed outside Pullman sleeping cars for such emergencies; but they did not mind standing in the vestibule and watching the bluffs and the houses as the train skirted the city.
"Running pretty fast," said Charley
"Probably going fifty miles an hour."
The little man did not reply. Perhaps he was a person inexperienced rewarding railways.
The train ran past several small stations apparently without slackening its speed, but at length it arrived at a larger town and stopped long enough for Charley and his cousin to go forward to a day coach. The *car* was full, but a small man in grey clothes and a wide brimmed hat promptly offered his seat to the girl.
"But people out here don't know much about running railroads." Charley continued, "Back east is where the railroads do things right."
The little man smiled faintly. Just then the conductor, a big man with a black mustache, came up and reached cut his hand for Charley's ticket.
"What the——! How'd you get on this train?" he said looking fiercely at Charley.
"Got on the back end just as it started,
and I think you'd better not lock up your ears so tight, too. We had to stand there till the train stopped before we could get inside. And the train outched out fully ten minutes before it ought to, anyhow."
"Well I'll — r Huh!" exclaimed the conductor, and turning to the little man he continued. "What do you think of that? They have tickets for Lawrence."
The little man laughed quietly and said:
"I think it's the most amusing thing I've seen for a long time."
"Look here, young man," said the con-
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Charley's upper lip began to quiver and the 'tears came into his poor little cousin's eyes.
"Oh, ob! What will we do?" She said with a pathetic accent on the do."
"Never mind," said the conductor sooth-
ingly, "we can fix it all right." And
turning to the little man, he continued,
"Do you want to give 'em transportation
back on Thirteen."
"Yes," was the reply, "you meet her at Marceline, don't you? Better carry them on there. They can get out of Kansas City on Seven."
The little man wrote on a leaf which he took out of a memorandum book and handed it to the conductor who punched it two or three times and gave it to Charley.
"This will be authority for the conductor of No. 13 to pass the bearer with one young lady from Marceline to Kansas City (signed, Dan'L Wilson, General Superintendent, Signature witnessed by Conductor Higgins."
As the conductor transferred the young
eople at Marceline, he said to Charley:
Ich Bin Doin.
"I'd advise you, young man, to go to some good friend lof yours and see what he can do to reduce that dangerous swelling in you head"
The Journal of Education commends this ingenious poem written in five-languages—English, French, German, Greek and Latin—as one of the best specimens of Macaronic verse in existence, and worthy of preservation by all collectors.
In tempus old a hero lived,
Qui loved puellas deux,
He no pouvalt pas quite to
He no pouvalt pas quite to say Which one amabat mieux.
Dit il lui-meme un beau matin,
"Non, nœun luth auro."
Sed si address Amanda Ann,
Then Kate and I have war."
"Amanda habet argent coin. Sed Kate has surreysurlet.
Et both sunt very agathae
Et quite formosae girls "
Eufin the youthful anthropos,
Philoun the duo maids.
Procedene then to Kate's domo,
I trove Amanda there.
Resolved proponere ad Kate Devant cet evening' f shades.
Kai quite forgot his late resolves. Both sunt so goodly fair.
Sed smiling on the new tapis. Between mollusc twain
Coepit to tell his love a Kate Dans una poetique strain.
Arifah Amanda's eyes,
Illae non possunt dicere
Ihae non possunt dicere
Pro which he ment his sighs.
Mais, glancing at anon
Afair. Arundell's wife
Each virgo beard the demi-vow
Capain Heskell Receives.
Both wispered, "Ich bin dein."
—Exchange.
Each virgo beard the demi-vow.
Whico cheeks as rouge as wine,
And off-ring each a milk-white hand
One of the most pleasant social events of the season occurred last Saturday evening when the members of the Y. M. C.A Bible class were entertained at the home of Captain Haskell. Fifty men attended and enjoyed thoroughly the delightful hospitality of this home. Games were played during the evening and elaborate refreshments served; college songs were used and the whole affair was a complete success. Captain and Mrs. Haskell were assisted in receiving by Misses Haskell and Edwards.
Miss Eidh Davis of Topeka visited friends in town Saturday and Sunday.
Mrs. Cora McCullum Smith led chape his week.
Snow Literary, chapel, North College,
Saturday 7:15 p.m, EH McMath president;
W J Baumgartner, program committee.
DIRECTORY
Adelphic Literary, room 27, Fraser Hall, Saturday 8 p.m, L E McKnight, president; E W Earbart, program committee.
Of the Literary and Scientific Organizations of the University.
Kent Club, room 9, Frazé Hall, Friday,
4 p m, C C Calkins, president; J H Tolan,
program committee.
Biological club, Tuesday, 4 p m, room 7. Snow Hall, Prof Barber, president and program committee.
Chemical Seminary, lecture room chem istry building, Thursday 4 p m, Pro Franklin,director and program committee
Economic Seminary, room 15 Fraser Hall, Tuesday 5 p m, Prof Blackmar, president and program committee.
Electrical Seminary, lecture room Physics building, Friday 10 a.m. Prof Rice, presideni and program committee.
Deutche Verein room 29 Fraser Hall,
Friday 5 p.m. A S Hirscher, president,
Mr Sweezy, program committee.
Greek Symposium, room 22, Frazer Hall, Wednesday 4 p m, Prof Wilcox,president and program committee.
Medical society, pharmacy room. Monday 11 a m, H Ewing, president and program committee.
Mining Journal, basement Frazer hall, Tuesday, 4 p.m, Prof Haworth, program committee.
Daamatic club, North college, bi-weekly,
Thursday, 8 p.m, Syd Prentice, president
Prof Vickery, program committee.
Burke Literary Society. Room 15 Fraser hall, Friday, 8 p.m. F. L. Graves, president, Mr. Sheldon, program committee.
Please leaua corrections and additions at the WEEKLY office.
APROPOS
Up all night.
Candle light.
Holes for eyes.
Many sighs.
That's the "Fresh." when he crams
For exams.
Naughty schemes
By the reams,
One long shirk,
But no work.
"Soph," when he cram
Bright and gay Night and day. Little care. Mighty dare.
That's the Junior when he crams (?)
Calm, serene,
Wise, I ween,
Dignited,
Satisfied,
Senior who crams
That's the Senior who crams For exams.
For exams.
—J. R. S.
NORTHWESTERN
In Washburn Review.
University Medical School
This school has been a leader in
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teaching of nearly forty
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the material and methods of teaching,
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Office                                                                  Lawrence,
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Office hours: 8 a., m to 6 p. m. |
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C. E. ESTERLY,
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Go to the Old Reliable
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Best Mhoe Repairer in the City.
Take Your Shoes to Him.
Moved from 1037 to 1927 Mass, St.
JAS. E. EDMUNSON. 9/5 Mass, St.
Boot and Shoe Maker $ ^{b} $
H. FUEL, JR.
Over Two Hundred Business Firms Applied To Us Last Year for Office Help,
First Door West National Bank
Makes a Special Reduction to Students
The reason why so many fail to secure or hold positions, or receive an increase of salary is because they are incompetent or only half prepared.
BUSINESS MEN WANT BUSINESS PEOPLE.
People who can do some one thing well and do it quickly, are constantly sought after by business men.
NATIONAL BUSINESS COLLEGE, Kansas City, Mo.
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Bookkeeping, Bookkeep-
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F11
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If you VERSITY will cos
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PHONE
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80