Page 10 University Daily Kansan, May 2, 1983 Going home can be traumatic By United Press International Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in. Poet Robert Frost wrote that more than 60 years ago, but more and more college graduates are finding that the words apply to them today as they leave campus in search of jobs and financial and emotional security. A TIGHT JOB market, rising rents, inflation and unrealistic expectations are forcing many students to return home with their diplomas, often after four or more years of living on the campus residence halls or off-campus housing. The arrangement saves money, but parents and children alike pay the price in other ways, say researchers and counselors who work with family members on both ends of the returning suitcase. "It can be traumatic for everyone, especially if things aren't worked out in advance," says Elizabeth Wiegand, a consumer economist for Cornell Cooperative Extension at the New York State College of Human Ecology. College of Hudson. "It's like being caught in mid-air above a hurdle," says Greg Magin, 22, a January graduate of Hamilton College, a private school in central New York. Magin moved back into his parents Rensselaer County home to work at "an interim job" while saving money in live in New York City. We have a "YOU'VE LEFT school behind, but you haven't stepped out into 'the real world' yet." Migna says. Wingand calls the trend "the re-filled nest syndrome," a twist on the term coined to describe the period of loss and loneliness many parents are said to feel when the last of their children moves out of the house. cumbersome now "Now a lot of parents who dreaded an empty nest may not even experience it." Wieand says. There have always been young adults who have used their parents' homes as way stations between college and jobs, graduate school or marriage. But in the past, the economy has generally been flexible enough to render those stays temporary. Today, home visits often last months, or even years, while graduates wait to land jobs, often under the obligation of paying back hefty education loans. STEVEN WEXLER, 24, moved back into his parents' New York City home last May after living away for six years, first at Princeton University, where he earned a bachelor's degree and then at the University of Miami. "I was certain I would have a place of my own by now," says Wexler, who is trying to break into the music writing and production business. "Even though my parents try to be accommodating, I'm used to having independence and privacy, and that makes it tough," he said. "He's a nice person to have around, but tensions do arise," says Steven's mother, Evelyn Brown. "I think it matters for her (for everyone) concerned if he were independent." It's important for all members of a family to realize that their situation will change considerably when a child moves back after having lived away, says Arthur Hitchcock, professor emeritus in counseling psychology and student development at State University of New York at Albany. "THE CHILD returning home disrupts the pattern of living the parents have established in the time before, and once again the child first he'd," he said. "You do have to readjust," agrees Evelyn Wexler. "It's hard not to slip back into parent-child roles. I find myself giving the same advice I did before Levi left home — drive carefully, put on a sweater, things like that." Trying to juggle job-hunting with rent and loan payments can seem overwhelming to recent graduates, Hitchcock says. "Many times they're not able to connect with the job market, and they need the time at home to assess where they're trying to go," he said. Financial aid plentiful, official says By United Press International It's never too late to apply for financial aid for college and never too early to start planning, says the vice president for student assistance services at the College Board. The College Board — the organization that makes the Scholastic Attitude Tests — also put out "The Book Book Story" shop guide for paying for college. Despite the aid of cuts in federal college aid programs and all-time high tuition and other college expenses, there are billions of dollars around to help pay the school bill, Tally Wickstrom, the vice president, said. "College costs continue to go up," Wickham said, "and the amount of state and federal aid at best will stay constant under the terms of real wages there is less aid." College costs range from nothing WATERMELON or KAMIKAZIES 3 for 1 w/coupon Expires May 12, 1983 MOODY'S 7th & Mass 843-9766 Will be open Sunday May 1 The Gramophone Shop offers any single purchaser every major brand of audio product at wholesale pricing. Wholesale purchasers are entitled to full factory-authorized service. It is the purchaser's responsibility to transport any wholesale product to the manufacturer's warranty station. Often, this is what many stores call "service." The Gramophone Shop Wholesale Division is unique in that you can purchase at or below so-called "sale" prices at any time and yet receive better service than mail order houses. You can receive your equipment immediately, in factory-sealed cartons; the units are not demos or factory dumps. You know what you are getting and you can get it now! for students appointed to the U.S. military service academies — to more than $12,000 a year in tuition, room and board charges at the most prestigious schools next fall. MAIL ORDER SERVICE AVAILABLE Students appointed to the service academies, as well as those receiving ROTC scholarships, also are paid a monthly stipend. The College Board guide "The College Cost Book" lists charges at 3,200 colleges and tells where and how to get a college scholarship available at school and local libraries. "THE INSIDER'S Guide to the Colleges" 1983-84 edition, gives the cost of colleges by state and SAT median scores of freshmen. Sources of scholarships and other forms of financial aid available to all students including federal programs for undergraduates and graduate student PUBLIC NOTICE STEREO WHOLESALE PRICES - Other private and state sources of loans such as state scholarship programs. - State educational benefits for veterans and their dependents and for others. *Student employment and cooperative education programs. The booklet is available for $1 from the American Legion, Children and Youth Division, Indianapolis, Ind. 46206. 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