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University Daily Kansan
Friday, Oct. 21, 1955
Squat Is Panned-
Editory
The first feature that caught my eye in the first issue of Squat was the list of staff members. The magazine has three advertising managers and no writers listed. At first I thought that there must have been a misprint, but after reading the magazine in its entirety, I realized that this ratio is quite correct.
by Dick Bibler
Upon recovering from fits of laughter (the jokes struck me so funny that I developed a laughing jag and had to take a sedative). I decided to make a tabulation of the contents of the magazine, and here are the results:
56 iokes
24 ads (consuming 6 pages)
6 photographs
8 cartoons
3 attempts at humorous articles
Of the 56 jokes, only five dealt with sex, a rather strange fact since this is the number one topic of college bull sessions and has been the leading theme of college humor magazines since the first issue of the Harvard Lampoon. My only conclusion is that some imaginary Lawrence Watch and Ward Society was looking over the shoulder of the Squat joke editor, inhibiting him as he culled his gems from the file.
The same thing applies to the cartoons.
The magazine's batting average on photographs was .500, a slight improvement over other departments. Still, I have a feeling that the three photos of "KU Coed" must have, by their pure innocence, been confused in the minds of the male readers with the covers of Woman's Day. In one of these photos, KU Coed is shown sedately studying on a wicker divan. This is college humor?
Finally, there is the Mickey Spillane parody. My Gun Was Stuck. I haven't been keeping up on the frequency of Spillane parodies in college humor magazines, but according to my latest statistics, 3.492 of them have appeared around the country since the advent of I. The Jury. However, these started tapering off about three years ago and were considered pure cliches by 1953. Perhaps Squat is starting a revival of Spillane takeoffs; but since practically no one reads him any more, this may create problems of literary recognition.
Just one final note to those three advertising managers: How about some Sweet Togetherness ads for the next issue? Sorority girls roasting marshmallows around the fire and that sort of thing.
John Irwin
KU Alumnus
Lawrence
-And Defends Itself
Editor:
The staff members listed in the front of Squat were the ones who worked night and day to put this thing out. Of the three authors, one requested his name be withheld, and Phil Hahn was listed as copy editor. Writer Marvin Carlson regretlessly was omitted from the front page list. Sorry, Marvin.
As for advertising, it is the lifeblood of any publication. We tried to do them in such a way, however, that the ads would be entertaining.
No sex in the jokes? Favorite in bull sessions?
Well by neddy-dingo, let's try something new and less shop-worn, maybe. I have heard reports that the first issue was not crude enough, but I also heard people laughing (out loud) at some of our stuff. That's what we want—laughter. The KU coed may not have been humorous, but wasn't she purty! Tut, tut now, all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Same with humor—you can get too much of it.
Mickey Spillane coming back? So is the Ivy League!
A couple of secretaries are buried in the files looking for a suitable definition of Sweet Togetherness. As soon as we find it, by golly, we'll get us one!
John Nangle
Burlington, senior
Photographers will have no worry in trying to identify previously unidentifiable pictures of West Virginia University football games this year, says the Daily Athenaeum. The entire Mountaineer squad has its numbers painted on the sides of its helmets. We think this will work as long as the team plays "heads up ball."
LITTLE MAN ON CAMPUS
HE LIKES TO TELL TR' BOYS ABOUT HIS DRAWING COURSE.
... Letters
Editor:
God bless the good old UDK! From the vast confines of the Ft. Bragg military reservation comes a hearty "thanks!" for several little items which have recently nestled innocuously in the mass of orderly Kansan type, notably these;
1) A featurette in the Sept. 22 issue, headlined, "KU Marines Trained For Hurricanes At Camp," and which stated in part: "Marines on the second floors of the barracks were moved to the first floors. Each wore his steel helmet, cartridge belt with bayonet attached, and kept his rifle near at hand in case an emergency arose. Not only did the KU Marines keep their weapons close at hand, but slept with them that night."
Now, really! This little gem, which casts absolutely no aspersions on the veracity of the Kansas feature writer responsible, has inspired this bit of doggerel which more or less matches the melody of "The Marine Corps' Anthem," to wit:
To the shores of old Cape Cod We will fight our Connies and Jones
From the desks of the weather bureau
With sabre and gun, by God!
Admiration of the forecasters.
We have seen some damn' good thrillers!
We are proud to bear the title of The United States Storm Killers!
2.) A blurb in the "Dear Jon"
column of Sept. 20 which blurtles:
"The only reason I write this stuff
is that I'm a sadist. . . I hate people.
I'm also a masochist. . . I hate me."
Now, again, it seems to us that
"Jon" is grappling for (or perhaps with) a word of a different stripe; a masochist derives pleasure from physical pain while one who gets his kicks from self-hate or mental torment is more accurately a hedonist. Still...considering the quality of the column, perhaps "Jon" is right in the first place. Anyway, we hedonists certainly do not want to be lumped together with those nasty, old, perverted masochists.
3. ) Finally, a 14-D-2 head buried in one of the back pages which certainly should have been elevated to Page 1 eminence: "State Patrol Needs 15 More Toopers." Anyway, if this somehow strayed out of the Want Ads, may I say that I myself am a tip-top tooper, but unfortunately will still be tooping for the next two months for my Uncle Fred . or was it Sam?
Yours from a cultural shut-in.
Sgt. Jerry W. Knudson Headquarters—SKY CAV—82nd Airborne Division Ft. Bragg, North Carolina (Journalism student-'54)
CHANGE TO YOU, SIS! THEY CUT
BRAINING DISTANCE IN NAFF ON ICE,
HEP GIVE YOU "GO" YETIITE!
CAR TUNES
Ever since "Two Years Before the Mast," more and more U.S. laws have protected the American enlisted man from the abuses of officers. And the trend still continues. Two airmen are presently suing a colonel who cursed them.
Imagine the mad scramble if someone called in an alarm while the Kansas firemen were holding school for a week on the Hill.
Just can't get people to stay at UN meetings. Get the Russians settled down and the Frenchmen walk out.
Daily Transan
University of Kansas Student Newspaper News Room, KU 251 Ad Room, KU 376 Member of the Inland Daily Press association, Associated Collegiate Press association, Represented by the National Advertising Association Mail subscription rates: $3 a semester or $4.50 a year (add $1 a semester if in lawrence). Published at Lawrence University year except Saturdays and Sundays. University holidays and examination periods. Entered as second class matter. Sept. 17, 1910, at Lawrence, Kan.
NEWS DEPARTMENT
John Herrington ... Managging Editor
Madelyn Brite, Gretchen Iguene, Irene C.
Six, Joe Ann Urban, Assistant Manager,
Bob Lyle, Assistant Manager, Bob
Lyle, Assistant City Editor; Dick
K. Waft, Telegraph Editor; Marlon
McCoy, Society Editor; Jane Pecke
Editor; John McIlion, Sports Editor; Sam L. Jones,
Assistant Sports Editor.
EDITORIAL DEPARTMENT
Rod Gleason
*Red*
Blankenship          Associate  Editor
BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT
Paul Burge - Business Manager
Robert Wolfe - Advertising Manager;
Charles Sledd - National Advertising Manager; Jack Fisher - Circulation Manager.
Squat Goes Over Is It Permanent?
Squat has made a good showing.
Students are laughing at the humor therein, and the magazine lives up to the pledge of its founders in skirting the edges of suggestiveness without falling into the smut pot.
Certainly many students on the hill were gratified to be able to read the magazine to their parents without words of censure from their parents. Others, of course, felt that the new magazine did not accomplish the alleged goal of campus humor magazines—shocking its readers into a state of humor.
The Sour Owl, published by Sigma Delta Chi, professional journalism fraternity, did not last year have the originality or the fresh ideas—not to mention the expensive "art"—which the first issue of Squat contained. The new magazine is certainly a challenge to the long-standing campus humor magazine.
A campus humor magazine for the ladies probably was needed.
But is the new magazine a permanent fixture of the campus, or will it degenerate as many campus humor magazines have in the past—as indeed some say the Sour Owl has degenerated?
The sizeable staff of Squat is a tribute to long hours and what amounts to organization genius on the part of someone connected with the magazine. The trouble is, such organizational genius and the person who has the long hours to spend with such a project are rare items at Kansas University. This, of course, is one of the many reasons for the decline of college humor magazine popularity in the United States in modern decades.
If the organization of Squat is permanent, insuring its continued success, it is a welcome addition to the campus. If it is not, the magazine will probably go the way of all once-popular publications.
—Ron Grandon
I've never tried to deny editors the right to abridge material for publication, but it seems to me (and to Mr. and Mrs. Wispy) that when it is clipped to the point of meaninglessness some kicking is in order.
The footnote to my letter (UDK, Oct. 19) came out as follows: "Whether or not his (Wispy's) financial situation improves depends on you and you and you. Since the day on which the wind got Wispy, his wife has won a Football Pickin' Contest."
So what? You either refused or forget to add that "She predicted 37 out of 38 scores (not games, mind you, scores) right on the nose, and just look at all she won: A three-year supply of ping pong balls, two unbreakable canoe paddles, two season tickets to the Campfire Girls' basketball games, a 1953 model, semi-automatic cement mixer, and a free weekend in Topeka. The Wispies will hold an auction for these items a week from tonight."
P. S. If by cutting out the above-mentioned information (thereby financially cheating Wispy—What do think he's going to live on until payday, anyway?) you were triying to bring all the readers' attention to the hollow-headed logic of the sophomore from St. Joseph, you are guilty of distortion. Wispy's fate means more to me than you think.
The Wispies demand immediate publication of this vital data, and your apology.
P. P.S. The UDK editorial of Oct. 13 was just as hollow-headed, in its idiotic generalities, as the reply to it.
P. P.P.S. Print this AS IS, or I'll sick the whole Wispy family on you.
Mr. Wispy Gripes About Wasted Words
Editor:
Peter Earle Graduate student
Candidates for the Ugly Man contest have been chosen and the sororities sponsoring them are already campaigning for the men of their choice, the Colorado State College Mirror reports. Some of us never seem to be in the right place at the right time.
Item from the Spooner, Wis., Advocate: "Forest Tripp was a Sunday caller at Grantsburg on Saturday." How early can you get?