PAGE SIX UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN. LAWRENCE. KANSAS MONDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 1951 Thought for the Day If not actually disgruntled, he was far from gruntled. —P. G. Wodehouse. The Editorial Page— Dizzy Jokes, Zany Rhymes Remind Us,Happy Valentine By ELLSWORTH ZAHM Valentine's Day 1951 is not going to be a very joyous occasion for some people. On that day some sweet young wife is going to rise sleepily from her bed, go to her dressing table to reroute a few tiny wrinkles now appearing on her cold-creamed face, and see the following propped up against her vanity mirror: HAG You're so darn ugly every morn, I bet your mirror shrieks! You look just like a sloppy bed That ain't been made for weeks. Happy Valentine. . . . While hubby giggles in the bathroom over his clever little joke, mama dresses, gathers up the child or children, and takes the fastest transportation then available home to mother. America has made a great thing out of Valentine's Day. Flowers, candy, and valentines are now a must for every male who has a woman on the string. Some of the latest comic valentines, however, should be useful for flipping the unwanted fishes from the string back into the sea. A great many of these comic capers are directed at the little woman. A husband might greet his wife with: And might greet his wife with: You scream that you know everything Because your brain is slick, Therefore you know where you can go. So why not go there quick. Nice and subtle isn't it? Another quaint jab at the wife is the following: CLUB WOMAN You're always at some silly club! Say, don't you have a home? What you need is a solid club Right on your dizzy dome! Or how about this little number? This is especially good for husbands to give to wives that pride themselves on their cooking. HOUSEWIFE Your hubby eats at work all year So he ain't too bad looking! But you look like a nightmare dear Cause you eat your own cooking! If mama enters into the spirit of the day, she can always retaliate with one of the following: TIGHTWAD You're tighter than a bearhug Or if paw is all swelled up over his golf or bowling scores, the little wife might try . . . In a very hot romance! When you have to change your pants! Those aren't muscles you've got sweetheart, They're mosquito bites instead If you think that you're an athlete You've got muscles in your head! sionally to instructors. Naturally enough the senders of these friendly epistles wish to remain anonymous and the usual procedure in delivering them is the "stick in the mailbox and run trick." Another advantage to using this scheme, besides perhaps avoiding physical harm, is that the recipient usually works himself up into a nervous tizzy trying to discover who sent the valentine. Small valentines with clever and friendly verses cost anywhere from 5 cents to 25 cents. From there the plush and sugary models take over and the prices rise accordingly. After looking at the prices of some of the valentines on sale this year, male students can take some consolation from the fact that Saint Valentine's Day is so called after a Christian martyr of the early Roman period. The custom of exchanging orate missives of affection and love peculiar to Saint Valentine's Day is believed to have been handed down from the Roman festival of the Lupercalia. A survey of the valentine market this year shows that never before has one had such a selection of elaborately designed messages of love. Priced from two for a nickel to $2.50 for a large garish, multi-colored satin and ribbon nightmare, one can find a card to fit any need. Celebrated in the month of February, this festival featured the Valentines Began In Early Rome By EMLIN NORTH Heart-shaped boxes of candy are also on sale to tempt the lad who really wants to make an impression. The prices on these are slightly higher, so before you buy one of these be sure you are going to get another date with the girl. In more recent times in may, Saint Valentine's Eve was celebrated in a manner very similar to the fashion of the Roman heathens. Maids and bachelors threw letters with their names enclosed into a box from which they were drawn. The person whose name you drew became your "valentine" or chosen companion for the following year. So started the custom of sending affectionate valentines to sweet-hearts, parents, children, and occa- placing of the names of the young women into a box to be drawn out by the men as chance directed. Yesteryears Over Prison Walls (From the Oct. 9, 1914 issue of the UDK) A set of rules has been compiled by Mrs. Eustace Brown, advisor of women, for young women in organized houses. The rules: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. No singing, playing, or loud talking after 8 on mild-meet evenings. Houses should be closed not later than 10:30 p.m. No monopoly on the N. mid-week dates. Radio Club Hears Coordination Plans Donald G. Wilson, professor of electrical engineering, spoke on the program of emergency coordination between amateur radio operators and civilian defense personnel in large cities at a meeting of the K.U. Amateur Radio club in the electrical engineering laboratories on Wednesday night. Fame Of Engineering School Reaches Anchorage, Alaska The School of Engineering and Architecture is getting more famous all the time. The following article appeared recently in the Anchorage (Alaska) Daily News; "An exposition of the University of Kansas engineering department displayed a unique 'kiss-o-meter' designed to measure the intensity of a kiss. Nearby in the same exhibit was a three million-volt atom smasher." Tries Traffic Trial Trick Fort Worth, Texas (U.P.)-The defendant failed to show up for his driving trial but he had good reason. He was in jail in a nearby city on a traffic charge. University Daily Hansan Member of the Kansas Press Assn. National Press Assn. Press Assn., and the Associated Collegeate Press. Represented by the National Ad- service 420 Madison Ave, New York City. News Room Adv. Room K.U. 251 K.U. 376 Student Newspaper of the UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS Editor-in-chief Managing Editor Business Manager Francis J. Kelley Richard Hale Bille Stover. Cli Editor...Marion Klewer Asst Cli Editors: Richard Marshall, Mona Millikin, Robert Sanford, Lee Sheepard. Society Editor Patricia Jansen Editor Edith E. Editors; Nathan Anderson, Dorothy Ogleesley, Rita Roney Harold Benjamin Billie Stover. City Editor ASM: Managing Editors: Marvin Arth. Bald Benjamin, Edward Rodgers, Hillman. William White. Sports Editor ... Asst. Sports Editors: Telegraph Editor Richard Tatum Asks Telegraph Editors: John Corporon, William H. Sports Editor...Bob Nelson Athletics Sports Editor: Alan Marshall. Mason Sports Editor: Alan Marshall. Forrest Miller Advertising Mgr. James W Murray Advertising Mgr. Alberto Dobson Administration Mgr. James Lowther Classified Ad Mgr. Dorothy Kolb Advertising Mgr. Albert Doehler Advertising Salesman: Albert Dohler Kawon Franke, John Kaiser, Page. Bob Sidney, Raymond Witten. Bibler Was Not Fair We believe that the Bibler cartoon depicting two women employees of the "Union cafeteria" rummaging through garbage cans was an unfortunate choice of subject matter that unjustly reflected on the personnel of the Union. We wish to offer our sincere apologies. The cartoon appeared in about one-third of the normal press run of the Daily Kansan Friday before we decided to stop the presses and replace it with another Bibler. You may well ask why the offending cartoon appeared in the first place since we have admitted that we believe it is in poor taste. To this we must reply with two rather lame excuses. First, Bibler now syndicates his cartoons to many college newspapers and is no longer a student at the University. We have come to regard his cartoons as representative or typical college humor not directed at any single, identifiable place or situation. However the Daily Kansan will not open its columns to undocumented charges against persons who are conscientiously performing their tasks when there is not a shred of evidence to back up those charges. In deciding to remove the cartoon, we had to consider that it appeared on the editorial page and could possibly be construed as "editorializing." Second, the sheer absurdity of the allegations expressed in the cartoon seemed to us to lift it out of the realm of reason. Everyone knows that Union employees do not rummage through garbage cans behind fraternity houses. It is utterly fantastic to suggest that they do. That is why we thought the cartoon was funny. But we didn't realize until we saw the cartoon in cold print that Union personnel might be offended. Because Bibler was once a student at the University there is a widespread belief that the characters in his cartoons represent persons on this campus. We do not believe this is true. The situation is not fact, and facts are something that editorials are built on. Honest opinion usually has some sort of rational basis. Gross exaggeration beyond plausibility is not always recognizable as humor. The Daily Kansan will not shrink from its duty to expose conditions that need correcting. We believe that our readers are responsible citizens who dislike and condemn unfair, irresponsible charges with no basis in reality. Therefore, we feel we must apologize to our readers and to the personnel of the Union—E.J.C. "Sorry Professor, No Pets." 100 .PAULCOKER.