PAGE SIX UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN, LAWRENCE, KANSAS THURSDAY, JANUARY 5, 1950 The Editorial Page- Jackals And Hornbills We know you're not interested, but we'll pose the question anyway. Who is the unsung hero of the newspaper industry? Immediately we can dismiss publishers and editors of any description. The reporter? Of course not. According to the bureau of labor statistics, his average wage, contrary to rumor, is only 13.4 per cent less than the mean income of the itinerant persimmon pickers—besides he sometimes gets a by-line. The printer then! Don't be ridiculous, he's unionized. But who? you ask with eagerness. We'll tell you. The little man who writes the fillers—those stunning tidbits of incidental intelligence found at the bottoms of the inside pages and other such obscure habitats in your daily newspaper. Sometimes he tells us the date the spinning jenny was invented, sometimes the heights of various and sundry mountains, or perhaps the number of sweet potatoes grown in the irrigated sections of Colorado. At other times, however, his prose becomes more imaginative—bordering on the right down creative. "During mating season, the male hornbill, not a large bird, often emits a screeching sound which even students of the hornbill confuse with the cries of a wounded jackal." This stimulating gem of enlightenment comes, not from a bushy-browed editorial writer or by-lined reporter, but from the pen of some nameless filler writer. We've never seen one of these men. We don't know that anyone ever has. But we have a mental picture of him: A mousy little creature, blinkky-eyed, afraid of people—people who neither know nor care where fillers come from. Probably he's as detached from the world as the solid little chunks of information to which he's dedicated his life. Probably if you ask him a question, any question, he'd inform you, with all the enthusiasm of a linotype machine, that in the lower reaches of Patagonia there is a tribe of semi-Caucasians, each member of which dances barefoot and barks like a Doberman-Pinscher when the moon is —James Jones, '48. Hail the filler writer! Editor's note: James Jones graduated from the University in the winter of 1948 and has since then been a reporter and feature writer on the Parsons Sun. We occasionally print letters from Mr. Jones in the "Small Things" column. Lawbreakers The former chairman of the House Un-American Activities committee has finally been sent to jail. J. Parnell Thomas has been given a sentence of six to eight months in jail and fined $10,000 for cheating the American people by padding his office pay roll to the tune of $8,000. But American justice is ever sweeter than this. Thomas can avoid paying the fine by pleading poverty, taking the pauper's oath and serving an additional 30 days in the federal prison. Thomas, who was described as "broken in body and spirit," by his defense attorney, did one decent thing before leaving for jail. He resigned from congress. Otherwise, he could have continued drawing the congressional salary of $12,500 if his former colleagues had decided that he was not guilty. In view of the light sentence Thomas received, it seems that some of our laws regarding embezzlement and fraud need to be revamped. Thomas' sentence was for less than a year. Congressman May of Kentucky, who accepted more than $100,000 for influence, entered the penitentiary last week to sit out two years for his wrong doings. He will undoubtedly get the customary time off for good behavior. Yet, two weeks ago, one Charles German of Indianapolis was sent to jail to serve up to five years for stealing a nickel in a street holdup. Any ordinary citizen can be fined as much and jailed longer than either of these congressmen for opening another person's mail or refusing to testify against himself at a congressional hearing. Today, the wise embezzler and lawbreaker will get himself elected to congress before beginning operations. —Richard Tatum 'Small Things' It's not the sub-zero temperature that the freshman wolf minds so much, it's just the fact that he has to go outdoors to get to all his classes. "Who is that stranger in the chancellor's office?" "Why, the chancellor, of course." "It's better to be broke than never to have loved at all." A number of students were married during the holidays, and we suppose that matrimony is as good a way as any to begin final week. Final exams loom ahead; term papers are due; everyone is broke. But don't be downhearted—Easter vacation is only four months away. Coming Events Kansan Calendar of Friday, Jan. 6 University of Oklahoma basketball game, 7:30 p.m., Hoch auditorium. Saturday. Jan. 7 Sophomore dance, 9 p.m. to midnight, Union ballroom. Monday, Jan. 9 Paganini string quartet, 8 p.m. Strong hall auditorium. Wednesday, Jan. 11 K. U. band concert, 8 p.m. Hoch auditorium. Monday, Jan. 16 Kansas City Philharmonic orchestra. 8:20 p.m. Hoch auditorium. Thursday, Jan. 19 Monday. Jan. 30 Final examinations begin. Enrollment begins for the spring semester. Current Exhibits Fur exhibit through Jan. 31, Museum of Natural History. Kansas is larger than all of the six New England states with Deleware and Maryland added. Chicago—(U.P.)—When a would-be robber demanded Mike Kollak's money, Mr. Kollak picked up his pistol from behind the counter of his grocery store. He fired two shots and the bandit fled. Bandit Laughs When Grocer Forgets Gun Mr. Kollak gave chase, cornered the fugitive, but just then a getaway car pulled up. "If you get in I'll shoot," cried the grocer. But the fugitive laughed as he was driven away. Mr. Kollak had left his weapon on the counter. Tax Commission Reports Receipts You don't have to go to school to learn what a valuable source of nutrition bread is. Yes bread has long been known as a healthy food. And it's just as good to the taste as it is for you! Try one-or several loaves of our freshly-baked breads. We have a variety to meet the taste preference of every member of your family. Topeka.—(U.P.)—The Kansas Revenue and taxation commission reported today record collection of $4,769,982.53 during 1949. The figure, according to Fred Horn, commission chairman, represents receipts of more than $4,600,000 ahead of a year ago. A guide to Kansas spending, the sales tax revenue remained about the same, Horn said. But income tax collections, a guide to Kansas' earning, were up sharply. Drake's Bakery 907 Mass. Phone 61 University Daily Kansah Student Newspaper of the UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS Member of the Kansas Press Assn. National Editorial Assn., Inland Daily Press Assn., and the Associated Collegiate Press. Represented by the National Advertising Service, 420 Madison Ave., New York City. Editor in Chief ... James W. Scott Managing Editor ... John Billey Assist. Editors Ed. ... John Billey Asst. Managing Ed. ... Anna Albright City Editor ... Keller Rutherford George Green ... Telegraph Editor Darell Norris Asst. Telegraph Ed. Norma Hunsinger Asst. Telegraph Ed. Frankie Walts Asst. Society Ed. Faye Wilkinson Business Manager ... Bob Bolthoine Business Manager ... Bob Bolthoine Circulation Manager ... Jim Shriver Classified Manager ... Jim Miller Dorothy Dorothé Promotion Manager ... Bob Day Diaries Date books Address books Birthday books Memo. books Calendars From Bumper- LAWRENCE TYPEWRITER EXCHANGE To Bumper, 735 Mass. St. You're Car Will Last Longer With WINTER-BLENDED, Transmission Grease √ Differential Grease Motor Oil AT MORGAN-MACK 714 VERMONT