PAGE TWO
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN, LAWRENCE, KANSAS
THURSDAY, DECEMBER 11.
11.1
Launderette Service
9 lbs. of wash, 25c
21 Bendix Washers
813 Vt. Phone 8368
DARNELL ELECTRIC CO.
DARKLE ELECTRIC CO.
• Scientific Motor Tune-up
• Automotive Tune-up
• Starter
617 Mass. St. Ph. 360
Super Xmas Gift
PARKER PEN 51
$12.50
Stowits Rexall Store
Drugs - Sodas - Sundries Fine Candies - Pipes Exclusive Mixture 79 Tobacco
Eldridge Pharmacy
701 Mass. Phone 999
You Are Always Welcome at Snappy Lunch
for
Hot Chili Sandwiches Soup Malts
Beat the Heck out of Georgia Tech
1010 Massachusetts
5 Days Left To Enter Orange Bowl Contest
WOULD YOU MAKE THE PARTY A SUCCESS?
REAL MEXICAN FOODS
El Tampico Club
Tacos, Enchiladas, Tostadas AND EVERYTHING ELSE WE'VE GOT IS HOT. Hot Tomales on Saturdays — Cold Drinks 801 Penn. Tel. 3373
Samples
DON'T DELAY Now is the time to shop for lovely gifts
at
Necklaces Chokers Table Lighters
Rings Key Chains Parker Pen Sets
Cigarette Cases Cuff Links Lighters
710 Mass. Tel. 368
$2 apiece, believe it or not,
for any of these we buy!
Are you dough-shy? Get us! We give the stuff away. Folding money, too. Yes sir. Pepsi-Cola Co. pays from $1 to $15 for gags you send in and we print. Why worry about an honest living? This is easier. Just send your stuff, along with your name, address, school and class, to Easy Money Department, Box B, Pepsi-Cola Co., Long Island City, N. Y. All contributions become the property of Pepsi-Cola Co. We pay only for those we print.
There's nothing to it—as you can see from the samples below. If, by coincidence, the words "Pepsi-Cola" turn up somewhere in your gag, don't worry about it. We don't mind. (Matter of fact, we kind of like it.) So start your stuff in now—for Easy Money.
GOOD DEAL ANNEX
Sharpen up those gags, gagsters! At the end of the year (if we haven't laughed ourselves to death) we're going to pick the one best item we've bought and award it a fat extra
$100.00
Our well-known moron-about-campus, Murgatroyd—now a student in the school of agriculture—has developed a new theory on sheep-feeding. He makes a daily ration of Pepsi-Cola an important part of their diet. "Duumnuuuh, of course," said Murgatroyd recently, when questioned as to his reasoning, "everybody knows that Pepsi-Cola is the drink for ewe!"
LITTLE MORON CORNER
Get Funky . . . Win Money . . . Write a Title
---
This is easy as falling off a log. A small log, that is. Just send us a caption for this cartoon. The best line gets $5. Or you can send in cartoon ideas of your own. For cartoon ideas we buy, we pay $10 apiece . . . $15 if you draw them.
HE-SHE GAGS
If you're a He, and know a She—or vice versa—this should be your meat. Here's your chance to strike a blow for the home team in the battle between the sexes—and maybe win three bucks besides!
★
He Ubangi: I hear that Mbongo has left his wife.
She Ubangi: Really? Why?
She Ubang: Really. Why.
He Ubangi: He says that every time she drinks a Pepsi, she smacks her lips, and he can't stand the clatter.
★
He: Why do you call my date "Pepto," when her name is Betty?
She! Oh, we all call her "Pepsi" because she goes with anything!
*
He: I never knew what real happiness was until I married you.
She: Darling!
He: Yes, and by then it was too late.
★
Three bucks apiece for each of these we print. Let your conscience be your guide.
Daffy Definitions
Here's a column that must have some deep underlying significance. Darmed, if we know what, though. All we know is that these rate a buck each—and the daffier, the better.
Frustration—having a Pepsi-Cola and no bottle-opener.
Stork—bird with a big bill.
Professor—textbook wired for sound.
Thirst = obsolete term; dates back to
pre-Pepsi-Cola era.
Cooperation—one bottle of Pepsi with two straws.
- * *
Paying $1 apiece for these is like giving you a license to commit burglary. But—$1 apiece for those we buy.
1. $ \textcircled{1} $ and $ \textcircled{2} $
34. P1 10 OT
EUR ONLINE VIBUAL JOANNE WALD