PAGE SIX
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN, LAWRENCE, KANSAS
FRIDAY, JANUARY 22, 1943
Gremlins Are The Best Known Pranksters Of World War II
My, how the gremlins are multiplying! We can remember—was it only a year ago?—when the world was doggedly fighting its second war supposedly unexposed to these mischievous imps who now seem to be wreaking so much havoc in so many places.
It is evident, of course, that we simply did not know about the gremlins before. This peculiar race of trouble-makers was first discovered by Royal Air Force aviators as they flew on their destructive missions over Europe. The RAF boys swear up and down that they have witnessed gremlins icing their wings, disabling their carburetors, stealing their maps, deflecting their bullets, and boring holes in their wings to simulate a machine gun strafing.
Discovering the American Air Force, the gremlins did the same kind of damage to our boys as they battled the Japs over the Pacific Ocean. Now it appears that the gremlins have numerous aunts, uncles, and cousins operating all over the world in all phases of activity where accidents may happen.
No one can escape them. Participants in competitive sports are particularly susceptible to their prankish acts. Automobile drivers must be constantly on guard less some stray gremlin will turn their wheels, puncture their best tires, or drink up his gasoline. Gremlins do not like gasoline but will drink it just to be mean.
Time magazine reported a few weeks ago that gremlins had been plaguing the railroads. During the Christmas freight rush, they clogged switches with snow, short circuited signal lights, iced rails, and drank all the coffee in the dining cars.
The gremlins are actually cheerful little creatures and have a remarkable sense of humor. They hate publicity because they have found that they can do their most effective work in secrecy.
One Of Their Favorite Hangouts Is A Newspaper Plant. They been known to turn pickshurs upside down and get lineheads mixed like to mix up lines of type and mispel wrods best of all but have up up.
we Would be willing to wager our last good typewriter that the GREMLINS resentour writingaboutthemenoughttoperformsome fiend ishdevilmentonthiseditorial.
There isreally nothingthat wecan doabout it.
—R.L.C.
Muscle-Bound Campus Coeds May Carry On College Athletics
Women at the University of Hawaii have solved the problem of intercollegiate sports competition for the duration of the war. Showing the men that they aren't the clinging-vine type, the women started their activities with volleyball and have now branched out into touch football and judo. The judo course is included for purposes of self-protection, and the women have also included pistol shooting among their sports.
If this new development in sports competition reaches the Big Six campuses, we may well expect a new appeal to be injected into intercollegiate sports matches. Servicemen, spending a short leave on the campus of their old alma mater, will flock to the gymnasium and the stadium to watch a team of muscle-bound college cuties strive to uphold the school's athletic honor.
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Just Wondering
How many of us can struggle through the 57 more days of winter. Spring begins March 21.
No longer will lantern-jawed bruisers coast through a week's classes on the strength of a touchdown-run made the previous Saturday; instead we will find members of the "weaker sex" getting their education on athletic scholarships. Coaches will scout the high schools to find promising young women with overly developed muscles to replace the present-day party girls who would hardly be at home on a gridiron.
Sororities from this time forward will emphasize making the team rather than getting a man, and the corn-fed country cousin, who has 99 relatives among the sorority alumnae, will be welcomed into the sisterhood as a potential three-letter woman.
Loss of manpower may curtail some University activities, but the women will make certain that athletic competition lives on in spite of the war.—G.S.
Among the other words destined to be dropped to a great extent for the duration is co-educational.
___O___
No one is quite as annoying as the person who tells a better story than yours.
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Student Paper of THE UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS Lawrence, Kansas
EDITORIAL STAFF
NEWS STAFF
Editor-in-chief ... Bob Coleman
Editorial Associates ... Dean Sims, Joy Miller,
Jim Gunn, Matt Heuertz
Feature Editor ... Betty Lou Perkins
Managing Editor ... Ralph E. Coldren
Sunday Editor ... Joy Miller
Wire Editor ... Virginia Tieman
Campus Editors ... Alan Houghton
Clara Lee Oxley, Milo Farneti
Sports Editor ... Milo Farneti
News Editor ... Florence Brown
Picture Editor ... James Gunn
Society Editor ... Phyllis Collier
BUSINESS STAFF
Business Manager Oliver Hughes
Advertising Manager Charles Taylor, Jr.
Practical jokes; impractical pranks: Don Gilles left the Rock Chalk Co-op party last Tuesday evening to get some chocolate. Shortly afterwards Beverly Greiner, Corbin hall, heard someone pound on the steps outside and scream for help. (As you may remember it was an icy night.) Beverly skated across the porch to the aid of the injured person who kept screaming: "Don't touch my leg!"
Boys from the house rushed out to carry Don in, while Beverly tagged along anxiously and watched them let Don down inside the house; then he skipped merrily across the floor.
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Thin ice: It is rumored that Doris Kyle, Gamma Phi, an hour before a date to go skating went down to the lake to test the ice and fell in. However that may be, her date received the news that she was in bed, when he arrived.
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The Call of the Wild
The news has spread from here to there,
From tropic ape to polar bear.
Panting natives bear the word.
The beat of jungle drums is heard.
Men are gathering, young and old.
The black, the white, the meek, the bold,
Gathering myriads as they near,
For ZILCH, the Great, will soon be here.
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High finance: Antonio Lulli, Phi Psi, affectionately known to his friends as "Toto," is now selling shoes at a downtown shoe store. He calculates that if he can sell one thousand pairs of shoes per month, the business venture will be financially successful. He is asking all his friends to buy shoes from him, using the motto: "Buy shoes from Toto."
The whole Phi Psi chapter has promised to buy one pair apiece.
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**Initiation:** Perhaps you noticed the Theta Tau initiates who are roaming around the campus in convict suits and balls and chains.
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Nomination for the title of World's Shrewdest Man: Bob Stoddard, Sig Ep, was approached at the dinner table by two of his brothers for a cigarette. Bob took out a package of king sizes and calmly sliced one in two.
Many Opportunities Career Women
As a defense against the inevitable fact that men are leaving the campus and a noticeable lack of the species is in evidence, the women have adopted the somewhat over used expression: "I am going to be a career woman." A few years ago, the co-ed with this idea would have been laughed into silence, but now, unfortunately, the expression rings only too true.
But the absence of men from encouraging fact that these men a industries. Thus, wide opportunities are now open for the women. Not many women mind trading marriage at college age for a well-paying job.
But the absence of men from the campus also brings forth the encouraging fact that these men are also absent from jobs in vital industries. Thus, wide oppor-___
The most commonly sought career of women, secretarial work, is now in greater need of help than ever before. The Civil Service needs stenographers and typists at the rate of 750 a week. This figure is only the women needed, while added to the other jobs that are open each week in Washington, the figure grows to 1,250. All Washington work starts at over $1,000 a year.
Need Secretaries
Defense factories, losing men steadily, are finding that women, as a general rule, can handle these vacated jobs efficiently. Women are doing such work as inspection, packing, supervising, training, personnel relations, and general office clerical work.
Jobs In Design
The Laboratory Institute of Merchandising in New York is training women for fashion salesmanship and design. In this school the women are taught fashion writing, fashion buying, color and design, fashion history, advertising, salesmanship,
and research. This type of study would be valuable in the post war period.
Thearmed forces need nurses to relieve women working in hospitals in the United States so that more nurses may be shipped across seas where they are urgently needed. Nurses will always be needed.
American airlines want stewardesses who meet these qualifications: registered nurse, not over five feet six inches tall and weighing less than 125 pounds. The women must be between 21 and 26 years old and have a nice personality and appearance.
Also The Domestics
If a coed is overly anxious to serve her country in the most active way possible, she may join the WAACS or WAVES or even the WAFS. The WAFS is the Women's Auxiliary Ferry Squadron and the women must be able to fly. That fact will limit the enlistment of women into this service. The WAACS qualifications are not so hard to fill. A WAAC must be between 5 and 6 feet in height, weigh over 100 pounds, pass intelligence and physical tests, may be married but must
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