PAGE TWO
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN, LAWRENCE, KANSAS
THURSDAY. MARCH 7, 1935
University Daily Kansai
University Daily Kansan
Official Student Paper of
THE UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS
LAWRENCE, KANSAS
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF ___ WESLEY GORDON
Associate Editors
Julia Markham Charles Brown
MANAGING EDITOR CAPOLI
Campus Editor    Sarah     Harry Valentine
Makeup Editors    George Moore,
                  Herbert Moore
Sports Editor      Robert Patt
Sunday Editor      Eleanor Winters
First Prep        John Prue
Society Editor      Shirley Jones
Exchange Editor      Goura Progr
Joshua Schmidt
Business Manager  F. Quentin Brown
Ast. Business Manager  Ellert Carter
Leen Wyatt  Eric Olor
Billiam Oliver  John Miller
William Miller  Rutherford Hava
Wesley McCalla  Jolie Markham
William F. Fischer  F. Quinney
William Blizzard  Joseph Docto
Business Office ... K.U. 6,
News Room ... K.U. 2,
Night Connections, Business Office ... 701K1
Night Connection, News Room ... 702K1
Published Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday,
Saturday and Sunday, in the department's
school buildings by students in the department
of Journalism. Pricing varies according to
the Press of the Department of Journalism,
advance, 8.25 on payments. Single copies, 6.
00 per person.
Entered as second class matter, September
17, 100, at the post office inLawrence, Kan.
THURSDAY, MARCH 7, 1935
TO LEFT. TO RIGHT
For two years, through the medium of dispatches to our best newspapers, we have admired the tropae-like dexterity of our President as reported by the Washington correspondents. If you remember the various descriptions given the direction of new deal policy, to left, to right, on dead center, you realize the difficulty of the poor reader like ourselves who just wants to know what is happening.
Eugene A. Kelly, of the Washington Times staff, explains the performance with hard-hitting fact in the current American Mercury. The ignorance of correspondents and the sheer impossibility of getting any information that government officials don't want you to have, are the main causes of the flubbiness and inaccuracy of news reports supposedly written by expert newshunters. Any nit-wit, he says, equipped with a telephone, could "cover" Washington from his bedside, such is the web of omnipresent press agents, and government-paid writers of hand-outs.
The press conference, heralded as a great link between representatives of the public and earnest government officials, he describes: "The reporters arrive, like children for Sunday school, immaculately dressed, their countenances reflecting extreme mental anguish. The government official presiding assumes the pomposity of a hicktown judge in court. The reporters lean forward with popping eyes, gingerly scribbling each word of wisdom as it drops from the mouth of the potentate. What the official says usually concerns himself or Roosevelt, or the wonders of the New Deal. Each verbal gem is pounced upon by the news-hungry reporters, delighted with the opportunity of writing without the aid of a press agent's hand-out."
No wonder it's to left, to right, and "the New Deal is now definitely at a stand still." What mortal could unwind the truth from the expertly edited reports of government "information editors" as they are called, or from the wisely worded answers of bureau heads whose function appears to be that of briefing their own case?
Kelly interprets the now famous expression "off the record" in its probably correct light: "What government officials mean by this statement is that the startling piece of information they are about to divulge is only for the consumption of the esoteric group of newspapermen around them." Kelly says the officials fully realize that such a preface to their remarks will doubly insure its publication, only from "another source."
For all of us, the implication is clear from stories like Kelly's, simply that we have to read our Washington dispatches with an eye to the good old question mark.
It has often been charged that the college student of today is fickle, lacks seriousness, and makes no attempt to solve the perplexing problems that confront the world.
HOW HIGH IS UP?
But a few of these charges will have to be dropped, a student in the University of Iowa has gone ahead and answered some questions which would have stumped our beloved Prof. Einstein.
It all happened like this: Applicants for jobs in the Farm Credit Administration must pass an intelligence test which included two unanswerable questions. Each applicant was supposed to mark "no answer" after two questions. The supposition was that anyone who attempted to answer one of these questions would not be fit for one of the jobs.
In answer to the first question,
"How long is a piece of string?"
the Iowan responded: "A piece of
string is twice as long as the
distance between the center and each end."
The second question was: "How far can a dog run into the woods?" To this, the brilliant lad said: "A dog can only run half way into the woods; after that he has to run out of the woods."
The next logical question in our
pension to ask him would be:
How high is up?"
Pachacamac is the name of a political party at the University.
THE GREAT DISSENTER
The "Great Dissenter" to one legal generation, and the apostle of human rights as opposed to vested interests in another, is dead.
Tomorrow Oliver Wendell Holmes would have reached the anniversary of his ninety-fourth birthday. In the early part of his long career he attempted to make changes in American jurisprudence, which he saw fulfilled in his later years.
His opinions given out from the bench were classies of the highest perfection, spoken of as "gems of exquisite diction, the essence of brevity which appeal alike to layman and lawyer in their logic."
A half-century of unselfish service to the people of the nation has been ended by the death of Justice Holmes.
ROCK CHALKLETS Conducted by R.J.B.
A Lawrence man swallowed the gold crown off his tooth the other day, and he went to the doctor to see what could be done about it. The doctor said it wouldn't do his "constitution" any longer and was unable to get his "clause" on it.
"Real newspaper work is entirely different from college journalism," Ima lectured a graduate this week. "You write for the press and you interview with men that sauce their coffee
Brush your teeth cleaner—quicker than ever before! Get the firm grip and protect your teeth in shaded safety. You can with this tooth powder, for it covers a wide field of surface. Yet it cost less. Try it today.
Jenall MILK of MAGNESIA TOOTH POWDER 25c
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OFFICIAL UNIVERSITY BULLETIN
Thursday, March 7, 1935
Notices due at Chancellor's office at 8 p.m., preceding regular publication days
and 11:30 a.m. for Sunday lessons.
There will be a meeting of the ALEE. this evening at 7:30 in Marvin Hall auditorium. Recent developments in the application of the photoelectric cell will be discussed in a lecture and demonstration by James Smith and William Dalrymple, C. F. H. T. D. WILLIAMSON, Secretary.
No.108
A. I.E.E.:
Vol. XXXII
A. S.M.E. will meet in a joint meeting with the mining group this evening at 7:30 in room 210 Marvin. Mr. L. S. Reagan, of the Webster Engineering Company of Tulsa Okla., will speak on gas combustion. A short business meeting will follow. H. E. MILLER, Secretary. SCIENCES ORGANIZATION
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE ORGANIZATION
The Christian Science Organization will meet this evening at 7 o'clock in room C. Myers hall. Please note change in time.
MAURINE JESSEE, Treasurer. CEP STUDENTS:
CSEP STUDENTS;
Checks for work done in February may be obtained at the CSEP office Thursday and Friday, March 7 and 8, from 130 to 5:00 p.m. (ATP002).
Habra una sesión ordinaria de El Atenco el jueves, 7 de marzo a las cuatro y media de la tarde en la sala 113, edificio de Administración.
NEWMAN CLUB:
CARLOS PATTerson, Presidente.
There will be a meeting of the Newman Club this evening in the basement of St. John's Church at 8 o'clock. Dr. W. L. Burdick will speak. Bring any documents.
T. C. LAWRENCE, Secretary.
PI EPSILON PI:
There will be a special Ku Ku meeting tonight at 10:30 in room 298 Fraser.
WALTER LYMAN, President.
SIGMA ETA CHI:
There will be Stigma Eta Chi pledging at 5:15 Sunday afternoon in the chapter room of the Congregational church. Jean Fink is engaged in the charge of the new active's program. Please be present. CATHERINE PENNER, President. STEEL KEY:
A very important meeting of Steel Key will be held Tuesday afternoon at 4:00 in room 103 Marvin hall. Election of officers, FORD DICKIE, President.
The University Women's club will meet this afternoon at 3 o'clock in Myers hall. Members who were unable to attend the finance tea may make their contributions to the scholarship fund at this time. The housemothers of the University will be guests of the club.
MRS. J. J. WHEELER, Corresponding Secretary. C.A. CARINET.
Y. M. C. A. CARINET:
The Y. M. C. A. cabinet will meet this afternoon at 4:30 in room 10 of the Memorial Union building. WILFRED McCLAIN, Vice President.
and use toothpicks. And you will find that these men are a beek of a lot smarter and better dinner companions than the pantwistwhites you've been running with for four years. Class is dismised." - Bertha Shore in Augusta Gazette,
Articles in this column do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the University Daily Kunan. Articles over 200 words in length are invited and all contributions on any subject are invite.
These bell-boy type of hats the girls are wearing will be useful in carrying the dog tooth violets that are gathered in the spring.
Editor Daily Kansan:
CAMPUS OPINION
Said the baseball player as he fanned: "You're my worst friend; you're my third strike." (Adc)
Perhaps one of the real faces on the "hill" is the great reflector and propounder of student affairs and opinion, and he has been an inspiration for three years, it has been nothing but
a weak-kneed sister; the great reflector expounding little in the way of news and most of the time failing to show real student opinion.
Lately, it has been patting itself on the back for the purported exposes of the M.S.C., the W.S.G.A., and the Owl society; with these great accomplishments behind it (call them accomplishments being in existence for seven or eight years before it) came to the attention of the news-hours) they now take a firm and what looks to be a biased stand on the new student government
Delicious Southern Style Chili
10c
UNION FOUNTAIN
Sub-basement Memorial Union
An artist friend sends us this
--league, namely the P.S.G.L. declaring, in the words of the editor, that "until P.S.G.L. states clearly and fully what part it intends to play in student politics it must necessarily be viewed as another political group." In other words, the great reflector admits that the policy of the League has not as yet been fully shown—yet has already taken a critical attitude toward the movement. It is clearly assuming an attitude, an unnecessary opinion, before
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the Kansan knows just what the League stands for. This is truly against the Kansars' so-called policy of a "drive for better student government." In passing, I would suggest that a few less exposes be made by the University Five-Weekly Kansan and a little more attention be focused on NEWS. For if the Kansan does not—they will be without a number of $3's next fall, or maybe it will be $4.50, who knows? M.F.L.
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