UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
DITORIAL STAFF
Official student paper of the University of Kansas
John M. Henry, ... Editor-In-Chief
Bradley Hayson, ... Associate Editor
Balden Hayes, ... Associate Editor
BUSINESS STAFF
BUSINESS
J. W. Dyche.
Business Manager
Cha S. Sturtavent, Advertising Mgr
REPORTORIAL STAFF
Ames Rogers
Bernard Miller
J. M. Miller
Don Davis
Donald Brindle
Paul Brindle
Harry Morgan
C. A.
Browns
Leon Hazel
Gilbert Clayton
Charles Sweet
Charles Sweet
Bimar Irdu
Fredt
Louis Puckett
Louis Puckett
Chaster Patterson
Subscription price $2.50 per year in advance; one term, $1.50.
Address all communications to
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Lawrence, Kansas.
Phone, Bell K. U. 25
Entered as second-class mail mat-
ter September 17, 1910, at the post-office at Lawrence, Kansas, under the act of March 3, 1879.
Published in the afternoon five bites a week, by students of the University of Kansas, from the press of the Department of Journalism.
The Daily Kansan aims to picture the undergraduate life of their students, then thaner印刷ing the news by standing for them and playing no favorites; to be clean; to be cheerful; to be careful; to leave more serious problems to wiser heads, in all, to ensure that university students of the University.
Fair Play and Accuracy Bureau
Ben Joseph
Student Member
John M. Henry
Senior Manager or
impression in any of the columns of the
research bureau at the Daily Kanan office. He
provides you as to further procedure.
HOLDING CLASSES OVERTIME
WEDNESDAY, MARCH 10, 1915.
Professors are again becoming adicted to the habit of holding their classes a few minutes overtime. In some cases occasionally, there is some reason or excuse for it, but when the habit becomes chronis and the holding-over happens every day something should be done.
The same professors that hold over time are usually the ones that are strict about the student getting to class on time. A little thought will cause these professors to understand that it is working an injustice and a hardship on the student who has a long way to go to the next class.
WE PRESUME
It is merely oversight and thoughtlessness on the part of these professors but it is decidedly unhady to the students.
That was the last of it. It did not make a report. In fact it said it would not make a report unless it could do something to relieve the situation. Then it said it might make a report at the next meeting of that particular branch of the alumnus about March 1. Now that date has passed.
A long, long time ago an investigating committee made up of the alumni of a certain city came to the University of Kansas to fined out what was the matter with it. The University had been accused of bad things and the alumni were going to see what there was to the charges. The University also wanted to see if there was anything the matter.
So the committee came up one stormy day and found out all it could with the aid of the students and faculty. Then it went back.
So we presume, since the committee did not report and since it was going to report if it could offer a suggestion if anything were wrong, and knowing that there never was a committee that could not offer suggestions if it found anything wrong we presume that the University of Kansas was found to be all O. K. by the committee.
ANENT THE SHOWER
When is a shower bath not a shower bath? .
When the nozzle is off and the pipes clogged so that it sputters and spits and vomits all temperatures of water, and refuses to leak at times, then cuts loose with a barrel at one spurt, and kicks the soap out of your hand and hits you in the eye, and you slip on the floor, and fall down, and then the hot belch comes, and you get up and crawl out of the steam on all fours, and grab your
towel, and retreat toward your locker using the towel, and cussing an Athletic Association that would have such an instrument of the Devil hanging about. That's when.
Both the men of the University and the Athletic Association will benefit from the recent action of the Association in offering cups to new track material, and furnishing money to the Hash House League.
BOTH WILL BENEFIT
Missed by the Oread Board of Censorship L. H. G. A.
**Indian Soldiers Give War Color.**
"Headline, Likewise, the African tristan
Germany is laboring under an illusion; it is impossible to win any "pronounced" successes in Russia-Poland.
Football players and cabaret dancers are about the only ones who are any place by kicking.
The price of board is going up.
Each wee kit waxes steeper.
A dozen stains lose their jobs.
A dozen stewards lose their jobs,
The task they cannot keeper.
The 'later-cakes have smaller grown.
The steaks begin to shrivel;
the meat is tender.
The boarders use a microscope. They need it like the "divil."
"I see Jitney is taking a course in type-setting."
"Well he is sure the type for setting."
Business of scouring out the hearse.
Chemist in earnest conversation:
"Is there alcohol in cider?"
Co-eed, passing by: "You horrid men."
Ad. in the movie show: "Have You a Child in Your Home and a Five Dollar Bill in Your Pocket?"
Students in a chorus: "Neither."
It is entirely fitting that "The Citizen" newspaper at the close of the Mott campaign.
Chasing the Glooms
"Quill *cab* to initiate." Wonder if anyone has to *lab* a porcupine?
"Bombard Antivari." How shockingly bad. Did they bombard Antivari hard?
A freshman offers the timid suggestion that if the state cannot furnish the board he is sure the sophomores can.
"Have you moved?" asks the managing editor on his pages. Goodness you aren't paralyzed, are you?
That back-to-the-farm movement got some backers at the end of last semester.
Pandora's Box
Maria Gugenheim belongs to this species. She has just been to a wonderful lecture by one of the biggest men of the country. "I was so disappointed in Monsieur L'Broine," she will whine at you, if you ask her how she liked the talk. "You know, I wish I weren't such a criterion on who should go to work terribly to have him say 'don't for doesn't.' I kept waiting in anxiety for fear he would say it, and he always did."
Don't you hate the little, insignificant brains, talentless man or woman who takes a special delight in tearing to pieces some big, broad-thinking, large-principled person? A person who could, figuratively speaking, fairly crush the stinging little insect between a thumb and finger of his wide hand! They are absolutely wrong. They don'tognats in the world—and can do more trouble than a whole swarm of real flies.
Why, she gave herself right away in her last sentence! If she was no bigger than to look for a little mistake in grammar in a speech which dealt with the biggest things in the universe, of course she was too small to be gripped by the breadth of the lecture.
Jim Downs went up to a violin concert. He had just begun to take lessons, and his mother wanted him to hear the big musician. "Aw, I didn't much like him," Jim growled after the concert. "You could hardly play the guitar well at all." My teacher makes me play it loud." And Jim fatters himself that he has passed a very clever criticism on Mischa Elman.
"I don't see why every one likes Agnes Green so well," Flosse will pout. Of course she is bright and handsome, but Betsa Kappe and her sides is the most popular, all around girl in school, but I can't stand the way she speaks to people. She makes me feel so little. Of course she's still beautiful because a mole hill never has and never will loom up very large next to a mountain.
UNDERWOOD
Holder of all World's Records for Typewriter Speed and Accuracy.
Holder of the Elliott Cresson Medal for Superiority of Mechanical Construction.
The Machine That Broke all Records in Mechanical History for Rapid Growth in Output.
912 Grand Avenue
Applied Poetry A Fine Art Course
"The Machine You Will Eventually Buy"
When Prof's last lecture is given (Swiped from Kipling and Smeared) When prof's last lecture is given, and his throat is acrid and dried.
When the poorest books are graded,
and the biggest staller has lied,
We shall work, for, latish, we shall have to work for a dollar or two. With the mind we have trained in college seeing this life anew.
Kansas City, Missouri
And those who work hard shall be
happy; they shall sit in an office
which is clean.
They shall eat from a silver platter a sirliin cooked quite rare;
Used by all World's Champions and Successful Speed Operators.
They shall smoke real black "two
and mild;" they shall make whole,
they shall make whole.
He is still on the line but the new sphere of women lets him average higher.
Send the Daily Kansan home.
But still the public shall praise them
And still the public shall blame
What has become of the o. f. youma
man who used to monopolize the tele-
phone line for 45 minutes talking to
her boss, a former golfer at the other
end I—Columbia State.
If they work only for money, or if they work only for fame,
But if they fight well for bigger things, and win, although not a blemish.
"When lo the sheriff campt at the front door of the shop and swipeth up his substance in a night and a Missouri mule haulet off the rear window. The auto is a mocker and the touring car is a rager and whose is deceived thereby should soak his noodle in lye. Vessels of wrath fitted into destruction are the devil-carts that eat the meat on a table in the end turn over" in a ditch and make his family into hamburger steaks. Woe is his name who dallies with them; even pants is he called in the market place who twists the wheel and winketh with the other eye at fate."—Empriorna Gazette.
Speaking the Kansas Language
their work shall count toward dей
the God of the Things
as They Are
THE AUTO
"The automobile is a fine bird, but it sucks blood. It has a song that lures men to destruction and women to vain pride that corrodes their happiness. Look not upon the buzz-cart when it is red and giveth stink to the evening breeze; for it chawthw also mazuma and sesterces, and rocks and dough, it lappet up like a house afre. When the devil-wagon champet and snortelt, flee to the mountains of the Hepsidam and crawl into a hole, or the old boy will get you and carry you to the poor house. Man goeth forth in the morning; chugging and shaking with pride; a wrench you life to you and a wreath; he pattent his belly with pride, saith he I am a six-cylinder brute, even a hallapla'oolam am I in my pride.
UNIFORMITY IN ENGLISH PRO NUNCIATION.
A scant 5,000,000 persons in the year 1500 used the English language. Now there are said to be 125,000,000 users of the tongue of Chaucer, Shakespeare, Milton and Tennyson, with another medium the intercommunication among Europeans, Americans, Australians, Asiatics and Africans there are but few differences. Of varieties of pronunciation there are more, and of intonation a yet number of numbers and variables are often compared with the points of agreement; and wide distribution of literature throughout the whole area of the English reading constituency and increasing travel of persons conversing in English are together fostering the development of spelling and of speech that in time will induce virtual uniformity. Hence formal propaganda efforts bring about this end are quite needless, as a contributor to the March Atlantic Monthly points out. It will be enough without quotation by champions of linguistic unity and concord.
Once let the passion for standardizing pronunciation and intonation take institutional and progaganda form and at once an issue will arise which it might be difficult to meet without development of some friction. The word *progaganda* is terminated by the practice of the men bred in universities and living somewhat apart from the great tides of human experiences or by the likings of the multitude for words, whenever found, that stand for insights and perceptible in the older terminology? On lines of this sort will men divide?
The difficulty of developing respect for authority, once it is agreed who or what shall be authoritative is especially obvious in modern society, and notably in matters of national identity, whether spoken or written. Such agreement as finally comes is usually a slow growth, informal rather than formal in type, and compassed by indirect rather than direct means. Nevertheless it also remains true that authors should also point to any due recognition by the English-peaking peoples that style in spoken speech is as important as it is in a book, and that no changed conditions of society on its political, economic or moral sides can be assumed without recognizing the niceties, perfections and achievements of linguistic commerce.—C. S. Monitor.
We need over two hundred teachers today for good positions. Science, language, mathematics, principals, lines of work. We placed scores of K. U. grads last year. No registration fee necessary. Write at once for particulars. Western Reference & pond Assm., 604 Scarritt Building, Bristol. Send Billman, Hotel Eldridge, Thursday p. m. 1 to 4—Adv.
Teachers Wanted!
Do you drink milk chocolate? Have you tried ours?—Wiedemann's. —Adv.
Something she will appreciate. A box of the world's best.-Allegretti's chocolates.-Carroll's.-Adv.
ARROW SHIRTS
are fast in color and steadfast in service.
$1.50 up.
150 up.
Cluett, Peabody & Co., inc. Makers
Students!
Fine Candies Toilet Articles Kodaks and Supplies Stationery to suit USE OUR PHONE ANY TIME Raymond Drug Store 819 Mass St.
C. W. STEEPER
Cleaning. Pressing and Remodeling Club For up-to-date men and women 10 years K. U.-Satisfactory results.
Satisfaction Guaranteed
A. H. Jenkins, K. J. Wilhelmsen Agsa.
Bell 1434
Laurel 1244
SHUBERT Matinees
Wed., Sat.
Nights and Saturday Matinees, 25c to $1.00
Wednesday Matinee, best seats, $1.00
Peg o' My Heart With Elsa Ryan and an Excellent Company NEXT—THE DUMMY
The University of Chicago
HOME in addition to resident
workers offers also instruction
by correspondence.
STUDY For detailed information address
22nd Year U, of C., Div, H, Chicago, III
Business College
Larvest and best equipped business college Kansas. School occupies 2 floors Lawsland TYPE or shoreband by machine. Write for sample of Stenotype notesand a catalog
PROTSCH
"The Tallor"
SPRING SUITING
Want Ads
WANTED—Work. Students wish work to help defray expenses. Not particular about kind of work. Bell 942W.
LOST—Gold watch between Gym and 1128 Ohio St. last night. Reward for return. 106-3
FOR RENТ-Front room upstairs,
1947. Phone 147.843. 107-38-
1947. Phone 147.843. 107-38-
Send the Daily Kansan home.
Allegretti's chocolates, the finest made, sold exclusively by Carroll.—Adv.
Box Stationery
All Grades—All Prices
McColloch's DrugStore
STUDENTS' SHOE SHOP
R. O. FURGERT, Prop.
1107 Mass. St.
Satisfaction Guaranteed
A Good Place To Eat At Anderson's Old Stand Johnson & Tuttle, Proprietors 715 Massachusetts Street
A. G. ALRICH PRINTING
A. G. ALRICH
PRINTING
Binding, Copper Plate Printing,
Rubber Stamps, Engraving, Steel
Die Embossing, Seals, Badges.
744 Mass. Street.
WATKINS'
NATIONAL BANK
Capital $100,000
Surplus and Profits $100,000
The Student Depository.
FRANK KOCH
Professional Cards
J. F. BROCK, Optometrist and Specialist
@ 802 375 1045. St. Bell Phone 695.
@ 802 375 1045. St. Bell Phone 695.
"THE TAILOR"
Full Line of Spring Suitings
STUDENT HEADQUARTERS
HARRY REDING. M. D. Eye, ear, nose and throat. Glasses fitted. Office, F. A. A. Bldg. Phones. Bell 513. Home 512.
J. R. BECHTEL M. D. D. D. O. $223
street. Both phones, office and
resident.
G. W, JONES, A. M, M. D., Diseases of the stomach, surgery and gynecology. Suite 1, F. A, A. Bldg. Residence. 1201 Ohio St. Both phones. 35.
DR. H. L. CHAMBERS. Office over Squire's Studio. Both phones.
A. J. ANDERSON, M. D., Office 715 Vt.
St. Phones 124.
DR. PETER D. PAULS, Osteopath.
Office and
practice, 7½ East 7th
practice, Both phones $51.
Hours 2 to 9, 2 to 5, and 7 to 8 by
appointment.
Dit. N. HAYES, 292 Mass. St. General.
N. HAYES. Also treat the eye and fita
disease.
Classified Jewelers
ED. W. PARSONS, Engraver. Watch-
Horses. Bell Phone 711, 717 Mass.
Bell. Phone 711, 717 Mass.
Plumbers
PHONE KENNEDY PLUMBING CO.
Mesa. Phones. Mazda lamps. Mesa.
Phones. Mazda lamps.
Barber Shops
Go where they all go
J. C. HOUGK.
913 Mass.
Insurance
FIRE INSUFFACIUM, LOANS, and ab-
sorption services. 20th Ave.
Building. Bldg 186; Home 2899.
FRANK E. BANGS, Ins., and abrogates of Title. Room 1. F. A. A. Bulldog.