NIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Official student paper of the University of Kansas
EDITORIAL
JOHN GLEISNER
Editor-in-Chief
Marco Macchiato
CALVIN LAMARTY
Sport Editor
BUSINESS STAFF
J. W. Dyer, Ph.D. Business Manager
CUSTOMER MANAGEMENT
C.BARB. S. STURTHMAN Advertising Manager
REPORTORIAL STAFF
LION HAMM
HOLLOW
GILBERT CLAUTON
GRAPHIC HEAVY
CHARLES SWEET
STANLEY
RIX MIDLER
RIX MIDLER
FRANK B. HENDERSON
BAYLINES YOUNG
HENRY HATY
JAMIE HAPPEM
M.S. CATT,
S.M. CATT
TETRON
SAM WAHLER
Entered as second class mate matter Sep-
ptember 14, 2014. Keima, under the act of March 3,
2014.
Phone, Bell K. U. 25
Address all communications to
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Lawrence, Kans.
Published in the afternoon five times a week. From the Kansas. From the press of the department.
Subscriptions price $2.50 per year in ad-
audience.com/form, $1.50
The Daily Kosman aims to picture the future of Kuwait as go further than merely printing the news by standing up for its interests and no-fragrants; to be clean; to be cheerful; to charismatic; to solve problems from head to heart, in all, to serve the best of its ability, the students of the day.
WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 30, 1914
WHO WILL BE FIRST?
The Student Council has announced its intention of taking the initiative in the formation of county clubs to boost for the mill tax for state educational institutions. The plan is a good one. Heretofore the organizations have been loose, and have accomplished little. With a good start much may be done.
This is a legislative year; a measure will be introduced to submit the mill tax to the vote of the people for a constitutional amendment. Constitutional amendments are difficult to get, and much work will have to be done.
And by work, wire-pulling is not meant, but publicity and explanation. The measure is beyond doubt a needed one, a good sound means of financing state institutions, that will do away with petty school politics, and will provide an ever-increasing revenue as population increases. A legislature with a policy of retrenchment cannot curtail the educational institutions.
To progress and expand properly a University must make plans for the future. With an uncertain income this cannot be done.
When the call comes for clubs to organize, get busy!
So, if the county clubs will work, there is a great deal that they may do. In other schools in Kansas the students have secured large endowments—but they have worked.
AT THAT PARADE
Your conduct Saturday night may decide whether student government is kept or abolished at the University.
When the pep paraders go down town the temptation to raid stores and picture shows is a big one. Once suggested, it spreads.
The Chancellor has expressed the hope that the students will conduct themselves in a lawful manner—he has also said that student government hangs in the balance. Draw your own deduction.
It cost one merchant last year 50 dollars to treat the students—or rather to agree to their demands.
And if the students do restrain themselves—well, there are plenty of pepful Lawrence merchants who enjoy a parade as much as its participants, and will do the right thing.
AGAIN THE PLACARDS
Although the University has been in session only a little more than a week, the Adams Street approach to the Hill is as littered with papers and dirty posters as any back alley. Multi-colored placards adorn the lamp posts, are stuck on the fence palings, are trampled underfoot along the way.
Since the police last year declared enforcement of the card-tacking ordinance, ways have been sought to gain publicity without disobeying the law. This accounts for the decoration of fences and lamp posts.
Why not keep the approach clean
What's the use of having the prettiest campus in the country, if we can't keep it pretty? Think it over, you who seek publicity through placards.
FRESHMAN "HONOR SYSTEM"
In spite of the fact that the class of '18 went on record as favoring the honor system, (although the resolution did not state just what it considered the honor system to be), Dr. Naismith has been compelled to ask them to refrain from jumping out the window at hygiene class. The number is big, the chance is good, but it's a long, long, way from putting in practice the well-sounding opinions expressed by the class.
Essays Picked Young
THE K. N. G.
The K. N. G. boys are the onl;
fellows in school who get their dress
suits free and do not have to pay
to see the basketball games or football
slaughters. Most of the men are
good looking and when washed and
ironed and in their uniforms, create
about as favorable an impression
a red tie at a Junio Prom. The ma-
cabler is called the "bookies," as they are
cluled in the society behind their
backs, are perfectly harmless,
but they carry big guns and wear a
string around their head to hold
their cages on.
They are extremely useful as ushers, and on occasions have made very successful attacks on Snow Hall. A K U. team recently won a prize for the team's most impressive prizes prefere to shoot off at the mouth, so life for a college soldier is war.
Pity the Librarian
Perhaps the following, taken from "The Secret Book" (MacMillan), by Edmund Laton Pearson, will explain m not constantly laugh and sing:
A few questions a librarian has to face in the course of a day's work. "What is the square of 96?"
At times behind a desk he sits.
"What dictionary is the best?"
"Don't you admire E. Poe?"
"How tall was preset him?"
"How much perfect e. P.e."
“What is a Gorgonzola cheese?”
"You mind if I leave baby here?"
“What is the fare to Kokomo?
At times about the room he flips—
"Have you a life of Sairy Camp?"
Haf you the Der Hohenozellern
"Are oysters good to eat in March?"
matter.
"Can you lend me a postage
buy?"
stamp?
By asking questions such as these:
"How old, I pray," was Sister Ann?"
"Who said. To labor is to pray?"
"What woman first invented
mits?"
"I'll Brunnel wear a satin sirt"
"that book I used o see?"
"I guess you don't remember me?"
'Ouest, mél, la grand Larousse."
"How do you use this catalogue?"
"A red one—can't you find it now?"
`Where shall I put this apple peel?`
"Who ferried souls across the Styx?"
"Are green bananas full of starch?"
starch?"
"What wages do they give you here?"
here.
"Say mister, where's the tele-
phone?"
"What should if cats have fits?"
"Do you say 'two-spot' or 'the dog'?"
"How do you spell 'anaemic, please?"
"Please, which is right? to 'lend' or 'lead.'"
"Come find my book—why make a row?"
"Come find my book—a book called 'Shapes'."
"On, "hear that noise. Is that my dog?"
daniel did. Daniel Lambert
"How much did Daniel Lambert weigh?"
"how much does his hook- why make a
"Have you the rhymes of Edward ear?"
**ROW?**
"Have you a book called 'Shapes of Fent'?"
INTERCOLLEGIATE RELATIONS
Pleasant intercollegiate relations are as important as good Nebraska spirit. A spirit in a University which does not foster the best of relations with other universities is not good spirit. The publication of an accusation against a rival university or do our own body or represent any good and will rancor in the hearts of our competitors.
of fear?"
"Please, which is right? to lend"
From start to finish let every loyal Nebraska remember that he owes to visiting teams the utmost courtesy and fair play. We must uphold the ideals in our athletics that our cultural colleges inspire. Our importance is our identity. If we do not put the underlying principles to practice, we University world. Kansas, Iowa, Ames, Kansas Aggies, Missouri, and all the other institutions of rank in the West, are anxious that we relegate all foolish wrangles to the
In this issue the Kansan begins the publication of favorite stories that have bloomed in K.U. class-rooms for Io, these many years. These anecdotes will be vouched for as authentic, the perennial flowers of professional wit. Refusal to smile at their recital, it is said, has meant funks in some instances, while a chortle of laughter has earned a high mark for many a stude. So read these choice anecdots from famous K.U. funsters and be ready for any emergency. Here's the first:
scrap heap along with the other barbaric elements which have dropped by the wayside--Daily Nebraskan.
Favorite Yarns of Kansas Professors
FOOL'S GOLD
By H. P. Cady,
forum of Chemistry
Professor of
A seedy looking man stole
lessly into a chemist's office
and closed the door softly behind him.
He sounded heart, what I say in
"Kin anybody hear what I say in here?" he asked anxiously. "Not a soul," the chemist assured him.
Whereupon the man produced a package carefully wrapped and handed it to the chemist, with the query: "What is this stuff, anyway?"
After examining the contents, the chemist replied: "Why, that is iron pyrites, commonly known as fool's gold."
"Oh, about three dollars a ton in
'carload lots.'
'What's it worth?" asked the seedy
fly.
"Just my peky luck!" exclaimed the questioner. "Dern if I ain't the biggest fool in the war with a widder's farm an 'went an' married the widder."
HARVARD'S ANTI-CASTE POLICY OPERATIVE
Six hundred or more youths entering Harvard College as freshmen this year will be housed, fed, humanized and educated together in splendid structures owned by the university and specially constructed to provide environment at once more fraternal and paternal (from the college officials' standpoint) than has been seen in Cambridge for many years. From the artist's point of view the completion of this group of buildings fronting on the Charles is an event that brings much satisfaction. The day of individual caprice and wilfulness and "go-as-you-please" in choice of sites and types of architecture apparently has ended, and henceforth the university will take its place with others in forming something like harmony and propriety in external development of the institution.
To a moralist the new plan of enforced residence of all beginners, most of whom are in their teens, in quarters where they can be influenced by ideals of conduct that are not wholly self-derived and contemporary, is significant, indicating a restoration in part of that earlier ideal. His official response to which he had a higher priority which once was presided over all parents and guardians children to college, but which of late years has not always been characteristic of American college practice. Harvard's new president, like Princeton's recent one—Woodrow Wilson—is much concerned over his duties to the freshmen, who are sons away from home and their first break with influencers that have brought them to right places where they need friendly oversight and academic community good will until they stand firmly on their own feet—Christian Science Monitor.
Student Union Barber Shop
Try our hot lunch, chili a specialty,
'california Fruit Stand.' Adv.
Students' Shoe Shop
P. O. Burget, Prop.
1107 Mass. St.
All Standard Tonies 1200 Tenn.
F. M. TIDROW, Prop.
Everything up to Now
LIGGETTS BOSTON CHOCOLATES
As well as Lowneys Always guaranteed Fresh
Good Work a Specialty. Prices right.
We also repair and cover parasols.
McCulloch's Drug Store.
Haskell's Big Home Game
Your only chance to see the Haskell Indians in a real football game on the home grounds will be next Friday when the Redskins clash with "Big Bill" Hargiss' Normalizes.
"The Kansan is all right," said Chancellor Frank Strong, this morning. "It is an unusually good college paper. I am for it. I sincerely hope that the Kansan will allow bi circulation. It certainly seems that a college paper that is one of the best in the United States should have the full support of the University."
CHANCELLOR FRANK STRONG
'INDORSES DAILY KANSAN
We'll Be Glad to Start You a Kansan Right Away
—You have until Nov. 1 to pay—
Don't Be a Sponger Subscribe Today!
Swede Wilson's For Billiards Phones 540
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The University Daily Kansan:
Watkins National Bank Capital $100,000 Surplus & profits $100,000 The Student Depository
A Good Place to Eat at Anderson's Old Stand Johnson & Tuttle Propleiters 715 MASSACHUSETTS STREET
Please put me down for a year's subscription to the University Daily Kansan for which I agree to pay $2.50 before Nov. 1, 1914.
R. E. Protsch
Signed...
Rent a No. 5 Oliver in perfect condition three months for $4.00.
The Oliver Typewriter Company,
Kansas City, Mo. e-o
Give her a good box of chocolates and she will appreciate them. Wilson's Drug Store has a full line of the best makes and kept in a large refrigerator case—always fresh—Adv.
Want Ads
FOR RENT- One double room nicely furnished, also one single room at 1221 Tenn. St. 14-3*
FOR RENT—Rooms and board for girls. 1145 Indiana. Phone Bell 1512. 41-3*
Mail your want ad with 25 cents enclosed to the Daily Kansan-want ads are payable in advance.
WANTED—A student barber at once—Kaw Barber Shop, 910 Mass. St. 7-6
FOR RENT- Two rooms for girls, at 1237 Iodread. BELL 2181W. 11-3
LOST- Brindle bull pup answering to-
name of Juke. White muzzle, feet,
and tip of tail; ears clipped. Missing
since Thursday. Notify Acacia
house, 1541 Tenn., and receive re­
ward. $1.1*$
Address...
DROP IN ANY UNIVERSITY MAIL BOX.
$1.50 up.
are fast in color and steadfast in service.
ARROW SHIRTS
Cluett, Peabody & Co., Inc. Makers
PROFESSIONAL CARDS
W. C. M. CONNELL, Physician and Surgeon. Office, 819 Mass. St. Bell 399, Home 9342, Residence, 1346 Penn. Tenn. Bed 1023, Home 639.
J. F. BROCK, Optometrist and Specialist in Scientific Glass Fitting. Office 802 Mass. St. Bell phone 695.
HARRY REDING, M. D. E., eye ear,
nose and throat. Glasses fitted.
Office. F. A. A. Bldg. Phones, Bell
513, Home 512.
G, A. HAMMAN, M. D. Eye, ear
Satisfaction Gunaranteed. Dick Bldg.
Fax: 516-872-4030.
DR. H. W. HAYNE, Oculist, Lawrence, Kansas.
J. W. O'RYON, Dentist. Over Wilson's Drug Store. Bell Phone 507.
J. R. BECHTEL, M. D., D. O. 833 Massachusetts Street. Both phones, office and residence.
G. W, JONES, A. M, M. D., Diseases of the stomach, surgery and gynecology. Suite 1, F, A. A, Bldg. Residence, 1201 Ohio St. Both phones.
DR. H. T. JONES, Room 12, F. A. A.
Bldg. Residence 1130 Tenn. Phones
211.
DR. H, L. CHAMBERS. Office over
Squire's Studio. Both phones.
S. T. GILLISPIE, M. D. Office corner Vermant_and Warren St. Residence 728 Ind. Phones 596.
Mrs. Emma Brown-
Schulz, Dressmaking and Ladies Tailor-
ing. Suits. Modescoped.
Phone Bell 914. 913
Mass. St. Neck.
next door to Anderson's
Bakery.
CLASSIFIED Ladies Tailor.
Merchants National Bank
ED. W. PARSONS. Engraver, Watchmaker and Jeweler. Diamonds and Jewelry. Bell Phone 717. 717 Mass.
Jewelers
MRS ELLISON, Dressmaking and Ladies' Tailoring. Evening gowns a speciality, 1032 Vermont. Phone Bell 2411 West.
MEALS and SHORT ORDERS
Dinners Sunday in a Special
Ice Cream Confectioner
Mrs. M. Brockelsby-Wilson, Kierster College of ladies tailoring and dressmaking. Over 909 Mass. St. Bell 2109.
MORGAN'S
SPECIAL MEAL TICKETS
1345 Mass. St. Bell 262
Subscribe now for the Daily Kansan.
Subscribe now for the Daily Kansan.
Plumbers
PHONE KENNEDY PLUMBING
KENNEDY AZADA lampsa.
807 Masa KONAMI 658.
807 Masa KONAMI 658.
Hair Dressers
HAIRDRESSING, shampooing, scalp and facial massage, shampooing, hair goods, "Marinello" toilet preparations. For appointments call Bell 1372. Home 51. The Select Hair Dressing Shop, 927 Mass. St.
Barber Shops
Go where they all go
J. C. HOUCK
913 Mass.
GO WHERE you get the Best. Bob Stewart's Barber Shop, 838 Mass. St.
Cafes
For a good clean place to eat, where you don't get "gipped" go to the MARKET CAFE, Room 1, Perkins Building.
Millinery
WANTED -Ladies to call at Mrs. McCormick's up-to-date millinery parlorts to inspect our new line of hats. 831 Mass St.
Shoe Shop
FORNEY SHOE SHOP, 1017 Mass.
St. Don't make a mistake. All work
guaranteed.