UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN The official student paper of the University of Kansas. EDITORIAL STAFF HEBBERT FLUNT JOE C. MADDEN EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Managing Editor BUSINESS SCHOOL HARRY W. SWINDLE BUSINESS MANAGER RAY EUDRIDGE Circulation Manager EDWINA ABRELA Advertising ANA PALMER Advertising JAM BROWN Advertising REPORTORIAL STAFF REPORTER LUCY RANGER HARland HUTCHINS LANDON LAIRD GLENDON ALLVINE JOHN MALOY HARLAND HUTCHINS JOHN GLISBERRAN EARL HUTCHINS BREATHFUL HORTONSTEIN KANDOPHE KENNEDY Entered as second-class mail matter September 17, 1910, an in office at Lawrence, Kansas, under the act of March 3, 18. subscription price $2.50 per year, in advance; one term, dilimbed in the afternoon five times a week, by students of the university of Kuznech, from the press of the faculty of economics. advantage, one $1.50 Phone, Bell K. U. 25. Phone, Bell K. U. 25. Address all communications to UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN, Lawrence. The Daily Klausan aims to picture the undergraduate life of the University of Kansas; to go further than students stand, to learn more about what they do and play no fantasies, to be cheerful; to be charitable; to be courageous; to leave more serious problems to other students; in all, to serve to the best or to enable them. TUESDAY, OCTOBER 14, 1913. THE HYGIENIC HORSE (Doctor Crumbine Please Note.) When the steward had nobly sped him, And the stableman had fed him, To the drinking trough he led him, But he coaxed to no avail; For the horse replied with hauteur, "You may lead me to the water, But to make me drink, you'd oughether Have an individual paul." —Life FALSE CLASS PRIDE The senior class in voting on the Jayhawk proposition last Friday showed good "horse sense" when it voted down the $7 plan in favor of a more modest $5 plan. The last two annuals have failed all the way from $500 to $700. Manifestly, then, we have been putting out books hardly justified by the high cost of living; in striving to surpass all other classes before, we have published beyond our means. It begins to look as if class pride of the sort that fosters extravagance is not only poor business, but poor sentiment. The class of 1914 will do well to consider long the matter of putting out a book as costly as last year's unless every cent is in sight before the operation is begun. Let's don't have any false class pride. To be born with a silver spoon in your mouth is a subtle indication that your parents had rather careless table manners. -Life. MODEST ACHIEVEMENT Although Mrs. Margaret Hill McCarter in a recent chapel speech remarked that "Kansas is fond of the limelight and limelight is fond of Kansas," there is at least one person in Kansas of whom that cannot be said, and that is Professor Preyer of the University Fine Arts Department, who played in chapel this morning. Like the prophet in his own country, Professor Prayer has no standing so far as publicity is concerned; but every student who failed to hear him in chapel this morning missed something which needs no advertising, asks no publicity—actual performance, demonstrated ability. It is a remarkable tribute to both the ability and modesty of Professor Preyer that he is better known away from here than he is here. As a composer his reputation is established all over the country and in Europe, but as an individual performer he rarely appears. And it might be well to remember that no man is any better than he should be. We know some men who seem to know everything that isn't worth knowing. —Penitentiary Bulletin. SPEAKING OF AGED PINEAPPLES The news story that a pineapple older than Mt. Oread was found in western Kansas this summer by Cursor Martin of the University paleontology department may sound freakish, but it a reminder to University students that might well be followed up. Kansas has a historical display in its museum that is hardly equalled anywhere in the United States, New York not excepted. It has taken years to gather that collection, largely by such painstaking work as that of Curator Martin, who searched a whole summer and feels highly rewarded by finding one lone specimen. Students will do well to take another look at the Museum's displays; they are unique. Chilon being asked what were the most difficult things replied, "To keep secrets, to make a good use of leisure, and to bear being wronged." USELESS COMMENT These are the days when the editor feels himself more than ever completely worthless when asked to comment on the football score rolled up Saturday against Washington. What's the use? No comment is necessary. If we have any to make it would be in looking ahead a month to Nebraska and Missouri, praying that if we get to our final game without a single defeat, we'll not be overconfident as we were in 1909—to our sorrow. Unfamiliar Verses DIE UMCHUNG Waer' ich nur ein kleines Bluemchen, Das bei im garten blüht Koennt' ich glucklich jedes Stuendchen Wie ich wuerde immer wuenschen Sehen ganz durch dein Gemuet! DIE UNMOEGLICHKEIT. Waer' ich nur ein gruuen Reben Windand sich so sorgenfrei Dir am筷 Dam, wuerd 'das Leben, Und das in die Hoche Streben, Süssen sein, waerst der nar dabei! -Adella M. Pepper Press Comment NO HICCOUGHS HERE YET "It makes the authorities of the University of Kansas mad to call it 'Kansas University,' yet these same esteem ed educators continue to call it K. U. for short," clamors an exchange. "If you want to do that then call it 'U. of K.' and everyone will be offering you a cup of water to take ten tips to cure your hiccups."—Fort Scott Tribune. Kansas University is having trouble with the tango. The best way to dispose of it would be to make it a required study - Little Rock, Ark, Gazette. Harry Kemp, the tramp poet and ex-Kansas University student, is to be deported from England. The English never would take a joke—Minneapolis Better Way. We see no reason why there should be such a hue and cry raised over the adoption of the Tango dance by the foppish 400 at K. U. There are doubtless students in that institution with no capacity for anything else, and there should be provisions for developing the talents of all. Downs News. BELIEVES IN VARIED COURSES Light. He was seated in the parlor And he said unto the light, "Either you or I, old fellow, Will be turned down tonight." Cornell Widow. The Kind You Have Always Bought The Kind You Have Always Book. The Kalamazoo Bread Co has purchased several carloads of hay which they are putting in their barns for winter use. - Kalamazoo Telegraph-Press. 'Because I'm Married! Of all the unique methods of evading "Gym," today's registration developed something really new. A big, healthy freshman steadfastly demurred, and when finally asked why he objected so seriously replied, blushingly, "I'm married." Daily Texan. Easily Pleased. Gabe. "What is an optimist?" Steve—"An optimist is a cross-eyed man who is thankful that he isn't bow-legged." —Cincinnati Enquirer. Fishing Fishing Jack—Claire dropped me a line yesterday. Stack—Look out, old fellow! She's trying to hook you. Dartmouth Jack o' Lantern. Legal Procedure The Sinner had been weighed in the balance and found wapling. wanting. Whereupon the attorneys for the Sinner filed a motion for a new trial on the ground that the scales were out of order. No person having once tried one of these coffins will ever use any other. HUMOR IN ADVERTISING Wanted—A young man to take care of a pair of mules of a Christian disposition. Cincinnati Enquirer. For Sale—A bulldog. Will eat anything. Very fond of children. Wanted—A boy to open oysters 15 years old Lost—Near Tipperery, on or about Tuesday morning last, a large pig. Had no marks on his ears except a short tail, and a slight limp in one leg. STICKS: OLD SOL GOES ON RAMPAGE "The "sticking" spirit was rampant at yesterday's game. With few exceptions the crowd remained to the end of the combat and several were compelled to scale the walls by the light of the moon. After ye author had been pulled away, there remained one fair damsel awaiting her gallant escort, who had gone for a block and tackle to start her on her homeward way. FOOTBALL CROWD STICKS: OLD SOL GOES ON DAMAGE The reason is well known. Old Sol, in his delight that Michigan had stopped up with Case, beamed a warm smile to Ferry field and the resinous substance oozed forth to gaze for the first and last time upon their shadows. Result: The crowd stuck to the end and to the boards. boards. For this reason, the assemblage did not arise en masse when the fifth, sixth, and seventh touchdowns were scored. If they had, the fundamental law of physics would have been overturned and the stands pulled from their foundations—Michigan Daily. J. F. BRICK, Optometris and Specialist Office 802 Masson, Phone 801 655-7141 W. C. M'CONNELLE, Physician and Hospice Director, Incidence 1346 Tenn. Hum. Hosp. Ia. 1029 W. C. M'CONNELLE, Physician and Hospice Director, Incidence 1346 Tenn. Hum. Hosp. Ia. 1029 HARRY REDING. M. D Eye, ear, nose bladder. Beds 143, Beds 152. Pictures. Bed 113, Bed 114. PROFESSIONAL CARDS G. A HAMMAN M. D. E eye ear, and Sallection Guaranteed Dick Building DR. H. W. HAYNE, Oculist, Lawrence, Kansas Kansas W. O'BRYAN, Denise Over Wilson's Ball Real Badger 407 J. R. BRECHTEL, M. D. D. O. 833 Mass Street. Both phones, office and residence G. Y, DENES, A. M., M. D., Diseases of the stomach, surgery, and gynecology. Suite 1, F. A. A. Bldg. Residence, 1201 Ohio St. Both phones, 35. DK, H T JONES, Room 12 F. A, F. Raise Residence 1150 Series. Phones 211. DAVID B. H. I. L. CHAMBERS. Office over Southern Studio. Both phones. DR BURT R. WHITE Osteopath. Phones, Bell 398, Home 257, Office, 745 Mass. St. CLASSIFIED Barbers Frank Hill's Barber Shop. 1025 Mass. Two good barbers. Satisfaction assured. J. C Rook's Barber Shop 913 Moss Chairs have linen, chairs never have to walk. Razor honors. Plumbers Phone Kennedy Plumbing Co., for gas phones. FM 658, Mazda lamps. 917-346- Mass. Ladies Tailors Mrs. Ellison, Dressmaking and Ladies Phones in Mount Vernon, Phones 211, over Johnson & Cartlard Ladies Tailoring and Dressmaking. Gowns for all occaions. All work guaranteed. Mrs. T. B. Daily. 914 Mass. sanitary establishment in connection. Phone 432 Bold. Lawrence Sewing School. Ladies' tailoring and dressmaking. swelling school 814 Mass. Phones 559. Miss Powers; Miss C. MeClarney. Hairdressing, shampooing, scalp and facial massage; shampooing, hair-goods; "Marriott touches" for men. For the boutique call Bell 1872, Home 41. The Select Hair Dress Shop, 927 Mass St. Sporting Goods D & M sporting goods and athletic supplies Kennedy & Ernst, $20 mass. St. Phones Sophia Ed. W. Parsons, Engraver, Watchmaker and Jeweler. Diamonds and jewelry. Bell Phone 717. 717 Mass. Queen City College. System and sewing taught. Dress-making in connection with school. Mrs. G. Mark Brown, 834 Ky. Bell. K7 1648. FALL OPENING LAWRENCE Business College Lawrence, Kansas ENTER AND MONDAY Violet Dulc Talcum Flesh and White 25c cans. Sold only at McCOLLACH'S Drug Store. The Rexall Store Lawrence Sewing School Ladies Tailoring and Dressmaking. * Sewing School. Miss Powers Mary C. McClarney 814 Maas. Phone 550. A Complete Assortment of Perfumes and Toilet Articles. RAYMONDS DRUG STORE, 831 Mass. 831 Mass. HAS THE NEW MULTIPLEX Hammond Typewriter Been Demonstrated to You? We wish to inform our many users in Lawrence that your M. J. A. Keeler, 39 Mass. Street, will represent THE HAMMOND TYPEWRITER COMPANY in your city. This wonderful (MULTIPLEX WRITER), with complete line of supplies can be had at Mr. Keeler's Store. We would be pleased to have you call and examine this Machine. Come on Down to JIM'S Tonight 1101 Mass. St Eldridge House Stable W. E. MOAK. Prop. Taxicabs, Hacks, Livery Baggage Haul Both Phones 148 The styles in Regal Shoes to-day are those you will see to-morrow in other Shoes. The case and saftness of the fashionable "English suits" are perfectly matched and mated in fashionable' Regal Shoes with their sloping toes, wide shanks, flat treads and low "block heels." $3.50 to $5.00 Peckham's Authorized Regal Agents. Crispin Model, provided in Black and Russet Call. Price $4.50 Fairfax Hotel and Dining Room Large Cool Comfortable Dining Room with prompt service. Special rates to club "feeds." Buy a commutation ticket. O. E. LEARNARD Manager 708-710 Mass. BIGGER THAN EVER The out put of Made-in-Lawrence Suits and Overcoats. Why? Because the men are learning that it pays financially and every other way to wear TAILOR MADE CLOTHES All seasonable flowers of the worth-while kind at All seasonable flowers of the worth-while kind at The Flower Shop Mr. and Mrs. George Ecke Leading Florists 825 1-2 Massachusetts Phones 621 The WATKINS NATIONAL BANK Capital $100,000 Surplus $100,000 Corner Mass. and Quincy Sts. Issues its own Letters of Credit and Travelers Checks. The only way to carry your money in safety. Banking of all kinds solicited.