SUMMER SESSION KANSAN
The SUMMER SESSION KANSAN
The Official Paper of The University of Kansas Summer Session.
Published in the afternoon of Tuesday and Friday by students in the Department of Journalism, from the press of the Department of Journalism.
Entered as second-class mail mast
ter September 17, 1910, at the post-
office at Lawrence, Kansas, under
the act of March 3, 1879.
Subscription price twenty-five cents
for the six weeks' session.
Phones: Bell K. U, 25 and 150.
Address all communications to The Summer Session Kansan, Lawrence, Kansas.
Advertising Mgr. .. H. W. Swingt
Circulation Mgr. .. Earl Potter
The Editor-in-Chief and News Editor will be appointed for each issue.
THURSDAY, JULY 3, 1913.
This issue in charge of Glendon Allvine.
THE MYTH OF INDEPENDENCE DAY
Tomorrow is the Fourth of July—Independence Day—the day on which we used to celebrate our freedom. But now, since the advent of muckrakers, mollycoddles, and reformers, we have neither freedom nor celebration.
A few years ago this day in July was the most important date on the calendar. It was a day for which young America began saving his pep and pennies months in advance. It was a day of cannon crackers, skyrockets, dynamite canes, Roman candles, cap pistols, nigger-chasers, torpedoes, and toy cannons. It was a day of unrestrained joy, a day set apart for the releasing of all the pent-up enthusiasm of a whole year. Little we cared if a premature explosion burned our hand or blew off a finger. Those were noble scars and small indeed in comparison with the wounds of those who fought for the freedom we then enjoyed.
Long live the dog with the fire crackers tied to his tail!
We want to suggest to the Summer Session profs that tey make their talks as breezy as possible.
Those days, alas, have passed. The law, closing in upon the railroads, the corporations and the malefactors of great wealth, has not forgotten the small boy. The law now dictates that his forty-five cents saved for fireworks, be spent for ice cream cones, soda pop, hot dogs, and flags. The country is going to the bow-
Why fret at the heat? That only makes it worse.
A CHEER SONG
Lose that grouch and forget that you feel peeved because Mary or John are travelling in cool lands and residing at summer resorts, while you worry and stew over a dry book. They are probably sleeping on springless beds, haunted by the wild noises of the "quiet country," and longing for the sight of a porcelain washbowl or electric lights.
So, come, good friend, let's all be happy, throw away our thermometers, and give heat thoughts the absent treatment. Just think how lucky it is that the sun is ninety-three million miles away!
GRAMMATICAL POLICEMEN
It would not, perhaps, be discourteous to call to the attention of our schoolmen and women the miserable English which too many of our students use. The fault of course lies with the user, but the teacher, by constant hammering away at the pupil, can do much to remedy this fault.
It is, indeed a serious fault com-
those in the high school and grades,
those in to high school and grades.
Repeated use of ungrammatical
language and words not in good use
by a student in any educational
institution leaves a bad impression
upon outsiders, many of whom seize
the opportunity to knock the whole
school system We have known
teachers in history and mathematics
classes who pay no attention to the
English in a student's recitation.
This is wrong. We believe that every
schoolman should be a grammatical
policeman, preserving order in the
English language.
The University of Kansas gives credit in rhetoric provisionally, withdrawing that credit if the student is found guilty of repeated use of bad English. Some such measure might be found effective in the high schools. The subject is, at any rate, worthy of the consideration of our schoolmen and women.
POPULAR SUMMER FICTION
Snow Hall.
Panama Hat.
Palm Beach Suit.
Summer Session Belles.
Best Boarding Club in Town.
No, I didn't flunk. I'm staying to make some extra credits.
OUR HOLE IN THE GROUND
Construction work on the new Administration building will shortly cease. The piers, footings and basement floor of the central section are completed but no further work will be done for two years. Contrary to the prevailing impression, no serious damage will result, we are told, from exposure and weathering to this costly hole in the ground. Indeed, we confess to disappointment when upon visiting the site after the last rains, expecting to find a first class swimming pool, we discovered that every precaution had been taken to drain and protect the work.
We are sorry that the work must stop. We enjoyed the chug-chug of the engine and the sound of blasts; we loved to watch our schoolhouse grow. But the strong box is empty and last year's freshmen will be seniors before it can be filled again. This unfinished building is no pretty sight. In fact, it wears the melancholy aspect of an abandoned enterprise, a busted boom-town, like worthy enthusiasm petered out, or good resolutions forgotten. But in spite of the mocking sympathy of endowed institutions who call us poor and try to entice our instructors away, K U. goes ahead preparing for the day when the new building will be completed and will be found too small for the intellectual activities of that husky youngster, the growing Kansas Student Body.
IN SEASON
See little Annabelle Spot,
The cunning, adorable tot.
What is she doing?
Flies she is shooting;
Hark to her swaity, swat, a
It has been suggested that the student who was fined five dollars for having a man's head in his back yard would be the logical man to organize a new secret society here to be known as "Skull and Bones."
A SONG
I. The College girl in 1907 sang:
II. The same girl in 1913 sang:
"All that I ask is love."
3. Three machines (not the sewne kind)
6. Season box at the opera
"All that I ask is love and—
2. A city home
5. A steam yacht
1. A country estate
1. A victroia
4. Fourteen servants
9. A villa in France
19. Furs, etc., etc., etc."
III. (P. S.—The girl is still sing-
8. A Pianola
9. A willow Bora
8. A Pianola
-Chaparral.
9. A. Diaphragm
THE OREAD ORACLE
What, oh, what can I do to keep cool. I am almost crazy with the heat. I am fleshy, and weight is such an impatient to one in the summertime. I can't sleep nights, and I continually have that tired feeling.
Dear Oracle:
I hesitate to mention the thought, dear oracle, but would it be possible for me to get a gentleman friend to fan me? Here again, I fear, my weight will baffle my plan. Can't you advise me of some relief?
All of Oracle's heart goes out to you. She too was once overly fleshy, but now thanks to the so-called food of Lawrence boarding houses she is fast losing weight. In regard to the gentleman friend idea, a baseball fan might help some. Oracle would suggest that you read the description of Mount Oread in the summer session catalogue, that's about as cool a piece of fiction as we know of. Try correcting some misstatement of one of the professors. This will cause a coolness on his part that will enable you to skate home.
Torrid One.
THE SAD, SAD GRIND OF OUR COLLEGE LIFE
A CUBIST POEM
Why should the Cubists have the art field all to themselves Why not do the same thing in literature?
Bang Pst Cataramaran Soup Explosion
This is a typographical impression of a nude woman falling down a well on the Fourth of July.
Translucent Beams falling aslant
Hoop Pistache ashes Bang Bang
Bang
It's Human
du de dhe de dupheph
Bungy de bang Mian Softly
Softly
Tell a man that there are 270,169,
325,481 stars and he will believe you.
But if a sign says Fresh Paint, he
has to make a personal investigation.
C. O. D.
—Life.
"I feel that I have an important message for the world," declared the
"Send it collect," advised the practical friend.
Buffalo Express.
After several earnest appeals from J. William Jones, Jr., aged 7. J. William, Senior, was persuaded to take his son to Percy Field to see a ball game. J. Williams, Jr., was much impressed, but had little to say about it. That evening when Willett preparatory to issuing his evening statement, he surprised his mamma with the following:
"God bless papa!
God bless Mahma!
God bless Willie!
Rah' Rah' Rah'
Amen! Amen!"
Cornell Widow.
The Rexall Store
Demand AUG. J. PIERSON Brands of Cigars
Diseases of the Stomach,
Surgery and
Gymeology.
Residence, 1201 Ohio Street
Suite 1, F.A.A. Bldg. Both Phones 35
G.W. Jones, A.M., M.D.
F. B. McCulloch 847 Massachusetts Srteet.
Robert Hudson Black Seal Pierson's Hand Made Manufactured at 902 Mars Street
For Summer Tan
MARLBOROUGH COLD CREAM
Softens, Whitens, and Belaches.
Sold in 25c Jars at
MCOLLOSCH DRUG STORE
Manufactured at 902 Mass. Street
For Summer Tan
Read the Summer Session Kansan
2015 Cents
Cluett, Peabody & Co. Arrow Shirts
Students
Sick Headache and nervous condition.
I can cure that
Burt R. White
THE OSTEOPATH.
Bell 939, Home 257,
745 Massachusetts
Gillham's
SANITARY BAKERY
412 W. Warren St.
Nothing but the best
one in and see the shop
Linn's Cleaning Plant
Clothing Cleaned, Pressed, and Repaired. Goods Called for and
Teter's
Delivered
LADIES' WORK A SPECIALTY Bell 1099 Home 1107
1017 Mass.
Cash
1053 Mass.
THE PLACE FOR GOOD THINGS
Grocery
SCHULZ
Phone 666
Eat
Your Meals
Anderson's Old Stand
Plumbers
715 Massachusetts Street
Call
Kennedy Plumbing Co.,
Gas and Flatfed S
937 Mass.
For Gas and Electric Supplies.
Call
Phones 658
FORNEY Repairs Shoes 1017 Mass. Try Him
HARRY REDING, M. D.
Eye, Ear, Nose, Throat
Glasses Fitted.
F. A. A. Building.
phones: Bell 120-745
A E. Thomas, a summer student, will spend the fourth at his home in Carbondale.
Read the Summer Session Kansan
SPECIAL SALE
Shirt Waists 98c
10 dozen new white and white with colored embroidery, waists that we bought from the manufacturers at a big reduction. These are all new styles and are worth $1.25 and $1.50
is a mighty good place
- TO EAT -
The Fairfax Hotel
ware.
Special 98c
WEAVER'S
Sheet Metal-Workers. Pumps and
Pump Repairing. Van's Cistern
Hardware, Cutlery, Stoves and Tin
That's what University boys say
708 Mass.
Filters.
O'Brien & Co.
Phones 664 621 Mass. St.
Francisco & Co.
812 Vermont Phonus 139
Livery, Hacks and Garage
LARK, C. M.
LEANS
LOTHES
ALL Bell 355. Home 150.
730 Mass. St.
Eye, Ear, Nose and Throat Specialist
Glasses Fitted, Satisfaction Guaranteed
Phone Bell 1700 Dick Building
G. A. HAMMAN, M. D.
LAWRENCE PANTATORIUM 12 W. Warren. Both Phones 506 Particular Cleaning and Pressing For Particular People.
We have the Kodak Line and Supplies
Raymond's Drug Store
Bell 190
College Inn Barber
BERT WADHAMS
Will Work Through Summer School.
Hours 7 to 1. 3:30 to 6:30.
Cigars and Tobacco.
At the foot of the hill on Adams.
J. W. O'BRYON,
DENTIST.
Best Laundry Work In Town
Over Wilson's Drug Store.
Bell Phone 507.
Model Steam Laundry
11-13 W. Warren Bell 156
G. W. BROWN, Mgr.
C. Edward Hubach
Head of Voice Department will be in Lawrence every Tuesday and Thursday morning during the summer for student who wish to consult him. Bell phone K. U. 67. Residence phone, Bell 372.
J. R. Bechtel,
M. D., D. O.
833 Massachusetts Street
Both Phones 343
We Clean, Press, Dye, and Repair
Clothes.
"CALLED FOR AND DELIVERED" Hats Cleaned and Blocked
K. U. PANTATORIUM,
JACK FULLERTON, Prop.
1400 La. Bell 1400:
Read the Summer Session Kansan
Dancing in the Pavilion at Woodland
It's Always Cool
Make your date and come out