UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
The official student paper of the University of Kansas.
EDITORIAL STAFF
OMAR HITE.  Editor-in-Chief
JAMES HOUGHTON. Associate Editor
HERBERT FLINT. Managing Editor
BUSINESS STAFF
JAMES LEIDHUR . . . . . . . Adv. Mg
JOHN C. MADDEN . . . Circulation Mg
KANSAN BOARD
EDWARD HOFMAN LANDON LAIRD
FRANK HENDERSON LELAND THOMPSON
LUCY BARGER JOHN GEISNER
H. B. HUTCHESNISS LESLIE E. EDMOND
Published in the afternoon five times a week, by students of the University of Kansas, from the press of the department of journalism.
Entered as second-class mail matter September 17, 1900, at the postoffice at Lawrence, Kansas, under the act of March 3, 1879.
Subscription price $2.00 per year, in advance; one term, $1.00; time subscriptions, $2.50 per year; one term, $1.25.
Phone, Bell K. U. 25.
TUESDAY, MAY 27, 1913.
Editorial page today in charge of JOHN C. MADDEN
Unpopularity is utterly worthless as a test of manhood's value. Robertson.
We all believe that knocks are bad, and say so with sincerity. But here's a knock which makes us glad—the knock of opportunity.
A CONDITION—
As a sophomore he joins an organization or two and the number of his acquaintances is increased by, say, twenty-four.
When a junior his attention is fixed on his particular line of work and new friends are made slowly, or rather, more slowly.
At commencement time he is introduced, think of it, is introduced, to not more than fifty-three seniors from the other schools. The odd hundred or so of his "classmates" remain unknown—inhabitants of another globe.
That's a condition.
—AND A REMEDY
Boost.
Two hundred University men might meet for an hour every evening, talk class politics, plot against the professors, borrow each other's tobacco and play a game of billiards —provided we had a Men's Student Union Building. Those temporary quarters that the Student Council is talking about would be a starter.
The University women might get together to hold their class meetings, plan their May Fetes and talk about the horrid quizzes—provided they had a meeting place. The Woman's Dormitory movement is not dead.
Push.
Some would take it to K. C. and "leave it here," others say.
Since we cannot all agree, let's beat Mizzoo at Holiday.
STICK AROUND
You will sell just as many books or have just as good a time during vacation if you don't hurry off so fast after that last quiz. The University always has an affair called commencement week just after examinations and there is a faint possibility that you would enjoy it.
It is reported that the alumni, seniors, and students have a high old time during the festivities. Better not wait to attend until time to get your own degree because only students with 120 hours credit are allowed to graduate and you may never be that lucky.
What's your hurry?
The student danced in fliendish glee and shouted "Hip Hooray, my dear! Another Prof has gone," said he, "there may be none at all next year."
OUR PLEA.
Ah, dear professors, gaze hitherward, lend us your ears, a petition is about to be presented.
Flunk if you must these lowly studies. Begin to look happy as quiz week approaches. Glory in our ignorance, impress us by your wisdom. But one thing, oh professors, refrain from one thing. As the hour for the preparation of the final examination questions draws nearer and nearer, as the temptation to delive into those unimportant, unfair, and unremembered details grows greater and greater, grant us one last request, oh members of our honored but underpaid faculty—one little favor do we beseach of you:
Do not ask specific questions.
We have a little word to say, it is a sad confession. If quizzes do not come our way we'll stay for Summer Session.
What did it mean, that head which was seen which told about "students who graft their way through?" Was it talking so rash about slingers of hash or that roommate who "borrows" a notebook or two?
MEMORIALS AND "PEP"
After we leave the University nine-tenths of us will remember the illa hedge longer than the sun dial. And thereby hangs a suggestion.
Fifty seniors with shovels and "pep" could plant a memorial hedge between the gymnasium and the engineering building that would be a constant source of joy to students out professors for years to come.
The cost would be trifling. There is a healthy suspicion abroad however, that University "pep" is reserved exclusively for football games.
"Umpty Ump" is bad enough in Daily Kansan heads. Yet—other things are worse than tough, for instance, "Umpty Umplette."
"Did you hear the freshman green who rent the air with loud guffaws? The Kansan's ancient joke was seen—that headline, "Art Exhibit Draws."
SOMETHING TO DO.
Resolve now, juniors:
To leave a memorial at the University; to publish an annual that is worthy of the class and fully paid for; to give a senior play; to have a permanent class organization.
The officers for this year will be doing the class a real service if they succeed in starting some of these things yet this spring.
HERES' ENCOURAGEMENT
Lawrence is making a great fast because so many K. U. teachers are accepting positions there, often here. This is rare. No college can exert the power to hold teachers simply by boosting salaries. Each department has but one head man and when others in a faculty become competent to lead, they simply go where there is such a vacancy. K. U. should feel like congratulating herself that she has men who have enough ability to be called away—Baldwin Ledger.
HERE'S ENCOURAGEMENT
OLD FRIENDS IN VERSE
"That fellow is a finished actor." "Did the audience do it?"
Alast they had been friends in youth. But whispering tongues can poison truth:
The Daily Kansan will publish in this space favorite verses of its readers. Contributions welcome... The Editor.
Punch Bowl.
And contинуacy lives in realms above;
And life is thorny, and joy is vain;
And to be wrought with one we love.
Dath work like muddens on the brain
And to be worn with on the neck.
Doth work like madness on the brain
WHY I NEVER SHAVE By Dr. R. L. Moody
Long years ago when I was a student I gathered vertebrate specimens for the University on the plains of western Kansas. One evening, while on such an expedition, I lay in my tent sleeping. Little did I dream of the impending danger. It was a dark and stormy night. The wind whistled through the pine trees. The camp fire burned low. My beard had not been shaved weeks and my beautiful brown belt.
FOR THE SHORT AND UGLY CLASS
Suddenly I awoke. I seemed feel the presence of other human beings in my tent. Several minutes passed but before I had time to move a muscle a huge Sioux warrior flashed his cigar lighter and held the little blue flame not more than three inches from my face.
My friends, for the first time in my life I knew the meaning of the word fright. My whiskers fairly gripped. But my lifelong life was paired.
The bloodthirsty savage took one look at my features and hissed to a companion. "We were folled. The hay for me." The hay the hay for his horse remained.
My trusty whiskers had saved me.
Then and there I resolved never
again to clip a single whisker. Can
you blame me?
WITH OUR OWN BUDDING BYRONS
By H. F
With a horrible three hour quiz.
THE STUDE'S LAMENT
I'd rather break rock for the county
Or buck the worst game that there is,
Than be left all alone in the class-
"Why do they call it short cake?"
The hungry freshman queries.
"Because," the senior answers,
"It's mostly short on berries."
A NEW JOKE
POOR TENNYSON!
Sunset and evening star.
And one clear call for me;
But that clear call, these days. alas
Is the class of the senior fee.
POOR TENNYSON!
A WISH
Profs are leaving, papers say,
Wish they all leave 'for' quiz day
WHAT TO DO?
What would I do with a million?
Don't ask that question of me!
I'd bribe the Board and the Chan
cellor And take the game back to K. C.
The Daily Kansan's Punk they say,
It is as pank as punk can be.
But you come in and try yourself
And see how better it will be.
A CHALLENGE.
In the past, members of the freshman class have each been assigned to some member of the faculty who has acted as his advisor during the college year. A new system proposes to choose these advisors from the senior class. The plan closely follows that which is already in use in a given country throughout the country, and it is a plan which has without exception prayed to 'be satisfactory'.
The new system of advisors would be advisable for a number of reasons. In the first place it would relieve the members of the faculty from a tremendous amount of labor and time, more precise in their roles within the pale of more nuanced activities. It would place in the hands of senior students a responsibility for the guidance of underclassmen that could not but bring results. The students themselves are a little more closely in touch with extra-curriculum affairs and conditions incident to a course of study than the members of the faculty can be. They could, in addition, advise with the perspective of a more recent experience, to better prepare advisors not but bring the best results. Students so chosen could rightly consider themselves highly honored, to be thus selected among the freshman advisors.
The new system would be of inestimable benefit to the incoming freshmen. Student advisors would invariably be more freely consulted than faculty advisors. It is common knowledge that some students go through college without knowing who they will be and that this system would be almost impossible. We believe that the adoption of the system of the system of senior advisors for freshmen would be for the best interests of all concerned—Minnesota Daily.
U. of K.CALENDAR
10:00 Chapel.
Tuesday
10:30 Chap. 2:30 Entomological club (Mu.)
230 Chancellor's open hour to faculty.
3:30 Economies Seminar, (Lib.)
8:15 Recrian. Miss s. fraser hall.)
Baseball: K. U. vs. St.
Marys, at St. Marys.
Kan. Pharmacy Ass'n Con-
ference.
0:00 Chapel.
4:30 Mining Journal.
4.106 Mining & Construction
Kan, Pharmacy Ass'n Con-
dential
12:00 Luncheon: Pharmacy Ass'n.
(B Robinson Gym.)
Thursday
0:00 Chapel: Prof. W. H. Carruth.
1:15 Concert: Mandolin club.
Kan. Pharmacy Ass'n Conference, continued.
Art Exhibit.
Friday
Legal holiday.
Saturday
Art Exhibit.
Missouri Valley Conference truck meet at St. Louis.
Examination Schedule
EXAMINATION
Classes meeting at 8:00 will be examined Saturday p. m., May 31.
Classes meeting at 2:30 will be examined Monday a. m., June 2nd.
Classes meeting at 9:00 will be examined Tuesday a. m., June 3rd.
Classes meeting at 3:30 will be examined Tuesday p. m., June 3rd.
Classes meeting at 10:15 will be examined Wednesday a. m., June 4th.
Classes meeting at 11:15 will be examined Thursday a. m., June 5th.
Classes meeting at 1:30 will be examined Friday a. m., June 6th.
Classes meeting at 4:30 will be exam-
Classes meeting at 4:30 will be examined Saturday a. m., June 7th.
Future Events
May 27 Recital: Lucy Parrott.
May 27 Pharmacy Ass'n Con.
May 31 Pharmacy Ass'n Con.
May 28 Pharmacy Ass'n Con.
May 29 Pharmacy Ass'n Con.
May 31 Mo. V. Con. track meet at St. Louis.
June 3 Fine Arts Commencement Concert.
June 7 Western Con. Games at Chicago.
June 8 Baccalaureate service.
June 9 Regatta, Potter Lake.
Band Concert.
Organ Recital.
June 10 Baseball: Alumni vs. University Seniors.
Band Concert.
Give words,ception.
Cantonment, OH
June 11
Commitment Address:
Philander P. Claxton, U.
S. Commissioner of Education
Commencement dinner.
June 12 Summer School opens.
May 27 Baseball. St. Marys vs. K.
Athletic Schedule.
May 31 Mo. Val. Con. track meet,
St. Louis.
THE SAD, SAD GRIND OF OUR COLLEGE LIFE
U. at St. Marys.
June 7 Western Con. games, at Chicago.
Pat (as the alarm clock went off)
—I fooled ye that time, I wasn't even asleep.
He—I hear there are some sanitary engineers in your bacteriology chass.
She—Good Heavens! I never saw one.
Jack—Tom is as honest a fellow as old Diogenes ever wanted.
Will—How's that?
Jack—Why, he wouldn't even take hint from anybody.
Minister—Spell kitten for me.
Oh, let her forth.
—Widow.
Minister—So you are going to school now, are you, Bobbie? Are you going to school now?
Mishaheed. Bobby—Oh, I'm further advances than that. Try me on cat. —Everybody's.
Here's the Coupon
Summer Session Kansan FREE!
No Cash In Advance
Subscribe now at the $2.50 rate and read the Summer Session Kansan.
The University Daily Kansan.
Signed
Summer Address
Please put me down for a year's subscription to the University Daily Kansan and the Summer Session Kansan for which I agree to pay $2.50 before November 1, 1913.
I will notify you in September if I desire to have the address changed for the Daily.
THE GREAT SHIP SEEANDBEE
The largest and most equally major staterun in history of the world. In June July 1972, Magnificent Steamers SEAANDBEK, City of Eic and City of Belfalf, Magnificent Steamers SEAANDBEK, City of Eic and City of Belfalf opened their inaugural port on the North Shore of New Jersey.
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H. T. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness,
D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness,
D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness,
D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness, D. H. M. H. Ness,
D. H. M. H. Ness,
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