UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
DECEMBER 31, 1918.
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Official student paper of the University
EDITORIAL STAFF
Editor in chief ... Helen Puffer
News Editor ... Lathar Hangen
P. T. Editor ... Jesse Wyatt
Sports Editor ... Melissa Watson
Sports Editor ... Edgar Hollis
BUSINESS STAFF
Adv. Manager ... Lucele McNaughton
Civilization Mgr. ... Guy W. Fraser
KANSAN BOARD MEMBERS
Moore South Fred Rigby
Marlboro Violet Matthews
Geneva Hunter Violet Matthews
Brooklyn Charles Slawson
Bea Shores Charles Slawson
Subscription price $2.00 in advance for the first nine months of the academic year; $1.00 for a term of three months; $10 cents a month; 10 cents a month.
Entered as second-class mail notice
from New York, N.Y., under the act of
Surrender. Johanna, under
Published in the afternoon five times a week, by students in the Department of Journalism from the University of Kansas, from the press of the Department of Journalism.
Address all communications to
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Lawrence, Kansas
Phones, BK. K. 12 and 65.
The Daily Kansan aims to picture the undergraduate life of students, further than merely printing the news on paper, and by providing a University holds to play no far-off role to be clean; to be cheerful; to be charitable; to be courageous; to be honest; to be wise; to wiser heeds; in all, to serve the students of the University.
TUESDAY, DECEMBER 31, 1918.
To spend New Year's Day going to class will be something new, but it will also be something in the way of a celebration. It is about the first time you have had a chance to go to class freely and uninterruptedly, isn't it?
AFTER THE WAR—WHAT?
The time has come—the good old days are here again. There is no more war, or influenza, or S. A. T. C., or sitting around waiting to be called, or K. P., or being marched to educational movies, or complaining about the food, or orating about the unrest that is everywhere. The excitement is over, and every one can settle down to the ante bellum monotony for which he has mourned the past two years.
The day of the alibi has passed, too. The main thing in the University this quarter is the pursuit of knowledge. Military duties will no longer serve as a valid excuse to get students out of things they should do. The students who did not care for the regular academic activity of the University have not come back. With the comparatively small enrollment this quarter, there will be fewer interruptions and less confusion in the arrangement of class work than ever before. The men and women who are on the Hill this quarter are here because they want to go on with their regular college work, or have come back in order to complete it. With a student personnel of this sort, real work and interest in academic affairs should be evidenced.
The calm, uncrowded atmosphere of this quarter's enrollment marked the beginning of the reign of peace at K. U. There is nothing to get excited about, and nothing to complain about. The side shows have closed down, and all the attention may now be given to the main performance.
TALKING ABOUT THE WEATHER
There has been an impression for a long time that the weather is democratic—treats everybody alike. You know. When it's sunny, why it's sunny.
Then there's rain. When it rains, it isn't any wetter for an Ounty Belle who grumbles because her clothes get wet than it is for the millionaire's daughter who hates to get her pink satin slippers damp.
Don't let them fool you though! The weather is not democratic. The weather is very partial to some people and treats others like a very much abused 'stephild.'
For instance, take the case of the two girls who last summer marched forth into the fields to help shock wheat. No doubt they did shock it, but that is neither here or there. The point is that those girls went out on the same day and in the same place;
they worked the same number of hours in the same weather. But did the weather treat them alike? It did not!
It never does! Nellie appeared the next week with a healthy tan that was the envy of all her friends who had been longing for a vacation on the sea shore, and Irene had to spend the rest of her summer using freckle cream and skin lotion so that she could appear once more in the society of people, who read advertisements about the "skin you love to touch."
Have I proved my point? No?
Well then, take the case of the man who could not make up his mind between two beautiful girls, both of whom desired to work for him for life.
One day, quite by chance, they both cornered him, and also quite by chance a rain came up and then came down upon them without the siligest notice, and before the young men could summon a taxi.
Now rain is a part of the weather but did it treat these two young ladies alike? No, it did not! One young lady right, and there "cinched" the young man with the help of the weather. The other young lady, due to the same weather conditions, was doomed to remain single for life- or look farther for a husband, to speak more correctly.
The weather, the undemocratic weather, I say, took the beautiful waves out of the one young lady's hair and pasted damp locks in the most unbecoming places on her face and neck, streaked her complexion, ruined her silk hat, made it all droopy, and cheerless looking as if a young nippopotamus had sat on it in several places, and in short, ruined every prospect the young lady (who by the way was in the beauty contest) hat for getting first place.
What did this tricky instrument of the weather do to the other compulsion of the young man? Her hair commenced to curl up in what Robert W. Chambers describes as "adorable little ringlets," her cheeks grew "red as a bright apple," the rain dripped on her mannish little hat merely freshening it up a bit. And the young girl smiled which settled the young man entirely.
The moral of all this is, don't ever be deceived into thinking that the weather is democratic, or in other words, if you are undecided as to whether a girl is beautiful or not, cave it to the weather.
The well-known student who tried to shove by his place in the line was not so noticeable at Monday's registration as he has been formerly. One earns to stand in line in the army.
Wouldn't it be a good idea for every student to make a New Year's resolution, to do his or her best to restores former K. U. pep at the University"
BETTER SKIP THIS ONE
"If you are looking for trouble, meet it half way." The individual who first promulgated this old adage is no longer present to defend it. He found what he was looking for.
Quite recently someone attempted to describe Lawrence as being downright inhospitable.
"It is the most gloomy place I have ever visited," said this individual. "I have roamed the streets for an hour and haven't met a smile."
"And what do you do?" asked the Lawrence man?
"So?" queried a Lawrence stand-patter in a tone that sounded the death knel of the complainer's plaint
"That's probably what the rest of the town is doing—scowling back," retorted the Lawrence gentleman.
"Do?!" said the down and outer, "I scowl back."
"The point is, don't try to kid the other fellow by scowling," he advised. "Get his pick by smiling. Or in other words, if you must make a New Year's resolution, swear to smile and stick to it."
"Yes," continued the disappointed visitor, "everyone I meet scowls at me."
Readable Verse
Discovered by Readers of the University DOLLY KENSON
If we have but brief repost Let us make the best of it.
MAKE THE MOST OF IT
Talk not of your weary woes
Troubles are the rest of it;
Life is but a fleeting dream;
Care destroys the best of it;
Swift it glides like a stream.
If your friend has got a heart:
Be yourself, not like them.
Mind you make the best of it Talk not of your weary woes.
Swift it glides like a stream.
Mind you make the best of it
Talk out of your weary nose.
Cast away my marker part.
Cling to what's devine in him.
Friendship is our best relief,
Make do heartless test of it
Make no heartless jest of it
It will brighten every grief
If we make the heat of it
There is something in him.
Cast away his darker part.
Worn shoes washed in big steam-
roller tubs the same as your collars
are washed back home, and puncture
and badly-wounded rubber boots
patched and vulcanized by the methods
the tire man uses in the garage—
these are two of the hurry-up ways
in which the Army salvage plant at
Blois is cutting time and labor in
making old shoes and boots into new.
SHOES ARE WASHED
"Ah said fohty cents," replied Ras-
Minneapolis Journal.
Rastus, awakened by reville, got up and, stretching himself, remarked "Man, ah feel like fohty cents this mawin."
In repairing rubber boots, big-scale operations have produced more novel methods. For instance, there's the drying of boots after they have been thoroughly washed. The boots are placed, soles down, over hollow tubes out of which rush continuous blasts of hot air.
No other shoe plant in the world washes shoes in a laundry machine, the salvage men say. Soaking hard-wearing shoes in oil vats is another new feature.
After all the torn parts have been cut away and the edges cleaned—perhaps the whole heel and half of the sole must be taken off—the boot is shoved in an iron last of exact size. Expert tire repair men then build up new fabric in the holes, using strips of thick material necessary. Then the boot is clamped in a steam-frame and baked until the new parts are as solid as the old.
Shoes that can't be repaired are not the upsets. French girls shred the uppers, making shoe strings, each makes a matte look or more strings.
-Stars and Stripes.
The most frequently misspelled words in the newspapers are, according to a sharp, patient watcher: "Haled," as in the sentence "haled into court"—it is often spelled "halled"; and "identify," which curiously enough enought in instance after inference. The word "estacy" is often spelled "estacy," which is often spelled "ectacy" or "cestacy."—Ladies Home Journal.
The Goddess of Liberty is French not American, as so many think. The phrase was given historical importance on October 5, 1789, when a starving mob of female furies, with canon, guns and pistols and horses rushed out of Paris to Versailles and charged the palace where Louis XVI and the members of his court were roeyestering and feasting. A deputation of twelve women was selected to present the appeal of the people, and this group in turn set forth the demands they gained for her beauty, as the leader of the delegation. As this revolutionary Joan of Arc approached the king she fainted, but when she recovered she won the good will of Louis. She obtained his promise of relief for the poor, and the king there upon bedecked her with flowers and hailed her as "the Goddess of Liberty."—Ladies Home Journal
Our boys in France are no longer called "Doughboys". They have earned the name "Dutch Cleansers."—Silver and Gold.
Clever Science Freshman: Oh, yes,
'yknow, they make almost all our
books now out of wood pulp.
Merely Mental Lapses Jokes and Alleged Jokes
R. V. C. "19": "Yes, logbooks, I suppose."-Mcdill Daily
"What you mean? " asked Moss
you mean thirty cents?
"Cant you tell me?" cried Ras
Robert had a new brother about 3 weeks old.
POINTS OF SIMILARITY
Whom does your little brother look like? " asked one of the neighbors. " I don't know that he looks much like anybody," replied Robert. "He looks a little like President Taft in the back of his neck." Dallas News
IN THESE TIMES
You remember William Hohencolzer. He's the chap who wasn't going to stand for any foolishness from the United States, "after the war." He'lliot he called upon to endure any 'foolishment.'"
tus, "don't forget to add that wah tax."
touch of a few trinkets, bobby
Private Jones: "Say, man! All I've
got that looks like money is my identification tag!" - Judge.
Private Smith: "Any chance for a touch of a few frances. Buddy?"
"William," snapp the dear old lady, viciously, "didn't I hear the clock strike two as you came in?"
THOUGHTFUL WILLIAM
ALMOST BROKE
NO EXPERIENCE
"You did, my dear. I started to steal ten, but I stopt to keep it from them."
"No," said the captain: "I never shipped on a whaler."
"Did you catch any whales?" asked the little boy.
"Was you ever shipwrecked?"
"No."
"Never cast on a desert island?" "No."
"Never been torpedoed?" "N."
"I did," replied the young man.
"And did you tell father you wanted to marry me?" asked the sweet young woman.
"H-m! you might as well have on land."- Pearson's Weekly.
HE WAS
"What did he say?"
"Nothing."
Our idea of a soft snap would be the position of road overseer of the proposed aerial routes—Minneapolis (Kan.) Messenger.
"Did he seem terribly put out?" "I think so; but I know for a certainty that I was."—Yonkers Statesman.
"Don't you thing prohibition has improved the town?"
"Are they seasoned troops?"
"They ought to be. They were first mustered in by their officers and then peppered by the enemy."—Baltimore American.
"Yep," replied Three Finger Sam. "Crimson Gulch is some uplifted. People now show the mayor and the superintendent of schools as much power as he did to show the bartender that did a credit business."-Washington Star.
Airplanes of less wing-spread than some of the largest abstrata of the South Seas are being produced in England, according to Popular Mechanics (Chicago, November). Says this magazine
DEFERENCE_TRANSFERRED
"The wings of these tiny machines extend only 15 feet, while albatross have been known to measure 17 and 18 feet from tip to tip. It is considered likely that aircraft of this type will prove valuable to the aerial mail service after the war is won. Large machines will no doubt be used for long non-stop flights, but for maintaining interurban service the small, less expensive planes quite probably will be employed, at least in England, it is contended. The artist's drawing presented herewis intended chiefly for comparative purposes. It shows one of the small airplanes taking on fuel in a village street, while a mAIL-bearing parachute floats earthward from a large "through express" flying aloft. One is struck by the thought that a 15-foot airplane would occupy no more space in a village street than some farmer's hayrack, although it is hoped that airmen will not get in the habit of alighting in such places."—Literary Digest.
Bismark: Above all, you must insist on the inhabitants of invaded towns the maximum of suffering. You must leave the people through whom you march nothing but their eyes to ween with.
MAXIMS OF FRIGHTFULNESS
Frederick the Great: Stripping your neighbors is only to take away from them the means of doing you a mischief.
General von Bissing: The innocent must suffer with the guilty. All that is as nothing compared with the life of a single German soldier.
Hindenburg: The more unmerciful the conduct of war the more merciful in reality, for the war is thereby sooner ended.
German War Book: International law (German version) is by no means opposed to the exploitation of the crimes of third parties (assassination, incendiarism, robbery and the like) to the prejudice of the enemy.
Wilhelm II: Create examples which by their frightfulness will be a warning to the whole country—Minneapolis Journal.
January Clearance
Of Women's and Misses Ready to Wear Garments
And Pre.Inventory Sale
OPENING THURSDAY MORNING
Continuing One Week
In announcing this sale we will not attempt detail of price reductions.
THE MARK DOWN FIGURES IN BLUE PENCIL will tell the story of your saving on
SERGE DRESSSES, SILK DRESSES, JERSEY
DRESSSES, SILK SKIRTS, WOOL SKIRTS,
TAILORED SUITS, CLOTH COATS, PLUSH
COATS, SWEATERS, SILK BLOUSES.
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS
For Rent
For Sale
Lost
Found
Help Wanted
Help Wanted
Telephone K. U. 66
Or call at Daily Kansas Business Office.
Minimum charge, one insertion 25c. Up to fifteen words, two insertions five insertions 50c. Fifteen to twenty-five insertion 35c; three insertions 55c; five insertions up one cent wenty-five insertion up one cent one-cent first insertion one-half cent a week's card insertion. Classified card -rates given upon application.
Classified Advertising Rates
WANT ADS
PROFESSIONAL
LAWRENCE OPTICAL CO. (Exclusive)
(803) 479-1250, (803) 479-1251, former examined
glassen is available.
G. W. JONES, A. M. M. D., Diseases of the stomach surgery and gynecology Suite 1, F. A. U. Bldg. Residence and Apartment 1019 Ohio St. Bck phone, 35.
FOR RENT—Desirable south room for girl, 1340 Tenn. 45-5-54
KEELEER'S BOOK & FORE - Quiz books
artistic make-up drawing supplies
Pictures and picture Training, Agency
Typewriters. 939 Mass
Street.
J. R. BECHTEL, M. D. Rooms 3 and 4 over Mccollachi 874 Mass. 4
G. E. OGLELL-Eye, Jeez, Noose, and
Special attention given to tonsils and
Special attention given to tonsils and
DR. H. REDING — F. A. U. Bids, Eye
drone, nose and throat. Glasses attached.
Gloves.
JOB PRINTING—B. H. Dale, 1027 Mass.
St. Phone, 2283.
DR. H. G. CABBELL, Physician and surgeon. Telephone 1284. 745 Mass. St.
Central Educational Bureau 610 Metropolitan Bldg. Saint Louis, Mo.
In these war times this Bureau can
In these war times this Bureau can offer available teachers more remunerative positions than they may secure for themselves.
Write for registration blank.
W. J. HAWKINS,
Manager
Hotel Kupper
Kansas City, Mo.
Convenient to the shopping and Theatre District —especially handy for ladies. being at Eleventh and McGee. Cafe in connection paying special attention to banquets.
WALTER S. MARS, Mgr.
Everything in University
CARTER'S
Supplies
Repairing and engraving diamonds, watches and cut glass.
ED. W. PARSONS
Jeweler 725 Mass. St.
1025 Mass. St. Phone 1051
HAN work of all kinds.
MRS. C. H. SANDER$
SHAMPOOING
Rates 35c to 75c
Hair work of all kinds.
MRS. C. H. SANDERS
1316 Tenn. St.  Phone 1036
Bought, sold, rented repaired, exchanged
Finest Breads and Pastries
Prompt Auto Delivery
TYPEWRITERS
MORRISON & BLIESNER
707 Mass. St. Phone 164
BRINKMAN'S BAKERY
816 Mass. St. Phone 501
TAXI 68
The College Tailor 833 Mass. St.
E. F. WIRTH
At Hatfield's Confectionery
709 Mass. St.
HOTEL SAVOY
Kansas City, Mo.
Kansas City, Mo.
Absolutely clean
Convenient location
Good Cafes, moderate prices
EVERYTHING
IN FANCY GROCERIES
Strong's Grocery
1021 Mass Phone 212
Conklin and L. E. Waterman Fountain Pens COLLOCH'S DRUG STORE 847 Mass.
SUITING YOU is my business
SCHULZ the TAILOR
917 Mass. St. Phone 914
Taxi 148
Calls Answered early or late.
Moak & Hardtarfer
.