Memo to Monotony
By Ramona Rush
Page 3
WHY NOT... put shoes on wrong feet so two different directions can be gone at once, thereby helping the activity-minded student maintain a high grade average.
ROUND-UP . . .
the remaining true beatniks to serve as guest lecturers on space study.
CHECK . . .
the backgrounds of all KU campus dogs to establish whether or not parents are alumni.
CONDUCT . . .
a study on the pulse beat variation of Strong
Hall coffee drinkers.
ADMINISTER . . .
intelligence tests to graduate students.
EQUIP . . .
with the latest safety football pads the policeman who directs traffic at the congested Oread intersection.
University Daily Kansan
FACE . . .
the fact that men remove their hats when eating not because they are polite but for the simple reason the hatbands hurt their temple muscles when they chew.
RE-EDUCATE . . .
the thinking student who believes in a Jonathan
Edwards-type grading system — "all is given
through the grace of God."
REALIZE . . .
that even though your own classic beauty isn't appreciated in our culture, it may be "reflished" in another, such as a cannibal kingdom.
DOWN WITH . . .
disagreeing masses.
UP WITH . . .
agreeing individuals.
INDICATE . . .
"muscles in the head" by butting a wall instead of going around it.
A SLOP . . .
is a wet slob.
DEVELOP . . .
a sense of inadequacy by running, not walking,
up three flights of stairs.
EXPERIENCE . . .
a traumatic situation when on the night before
an exam, lecture notes are not to be found.
END . . .
a memo with a period ●
From the Magazine Rack
"Copeland's scholarship as an undergraduate was no more distinguished than it was when he became a college teacher. His colleagues were to say of him that he was an extremly well-read man, but not truly a scholar. He was impatient with the burrowing of candidates for the Ph.D. degree in English, which he was never tempted to try for. He liked to speak of the 'Ph.D. death-rattle,' and when the president of Bryn Mawr, Miss Carey Thomas, asked him to suggest some promising young man whom he thought eligible for her English staff, making the proviso that they have their doctorates, Copeland sarcastically replied that it was unfortunate she could not avail herself of the services of such men as George Lyman Kittredge, Barrett Wendell, Bliss Perry, and 'your humble servant,' none of whom had slaved over a thesis on the use of the conjunction 'and' in Chaucer. The outburst was typical of a man who, although always an inveterate reader, was proud of having once remarked, 'A man is always better than a book.'...
Copey of Harvard
"ONE OF THE most persistent of the legends which grew up about Copeland was that he was one of the laziest of men. It is a charge that needs examination. Throughout his life he was a procrastinator in the matter of authorship; every editor who engaged his services came to the point of desperation; always Copeland was pleading for more time, whether the manuscript was a book or an article. Indeed, the book which he talked so much of writing in his later years, and which he had promised to do for Maxwell Perkins of Scribner's, was never committed to paper. The only trace of it among his papers was part of an introduction amounting to two hundred words. The story told of him by Kenneth Maegowan, who was one of his student secretaries, is typical of his failing in this respect. Two former students had found several unpublished stories by Kipling in an Indian periodical, and asked Copeland to do an introduction. He consented, and wrote half of it, then went to New York for the Christmas holidays. There he received a wire which Macgowan had forwarded to him: "We go to press. Where is the rest of your copy?" The answer was definite and laconic: 'Go to press. C.T.C.'...
"HE WAS MADE an assistant professor in 1910, associate professor in 1917, and eight years later succeeded Dean Briggs in the historic Boylston Professorship of Rhetoric and Oratory . . . It had been a long wait for Copeland. First, there had been President Eliot's disapproval, and then the attitude held by most of the senior members of the English department, whose committee made recommendations for advancement to the Faculty, the President, and the Corporation. In the light of professional academic standards, it is not hard to see why he had been passed over time and again. True, he had been an extremely popular and effective teacher, attracting year after year a growing number of students. But he had made no contributions to scholarship or to graduate teaching, and his publications were meager. There were other men who had worked harder as professional scholars; were they to be denied advancement in his favor? This was the point of view held by his classmate Kittredge and others. On the other hand, men like Briggs and Bliss Perry felt that Copeland had made a unique contribution to Harvard teaching and, finally, aided by pressure brought to bear by a group of influential alumni who were members of the Copeland Association, their point of view prevailed, and even Kittredge was wor over."
(Excerpted from the book "Copey cf Harvard," by J. Donald Adams, published by Houghton Mifflin Co.)
Friday. Oct. 7, 1960
AUSTIN, Tex. — (UPI) — Standing as a shrine near the University of Texas campus is an oil rig known as Santa Rita, the symbol of the school's source of wealth.
Backyard Oil Helps Support Texas U.
The Santa Rita well blew in on May 23, 1923, to supply the first of the university's oil money. Since that day, West Texas oil lands have provided more than $300 million to the University Fund.
The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.-F. Scott Fitzgerald
By Calder M. Pickett Associate Professor of Journalism
THE HOUSE OF THE DEAD, by Fyodor Dostoyevsky. Dell Laurel Books, 50 cents.
Though a lesser-known work of Dostoyevsky, "The House of the Dead" is important to understand fully this complex and great novelist. Though Dostoyevsky adopts the pose of using the manuscript of another man, the book is an autobiographical depiction of his imprisonment in Siberia.
As such, it is a foreshadowing of the psychological penetration which would mark the later great works. In its own right it is a dramatic, detailed and brooding story.
As a story of prison life it serves as a model which Belbenoit may have used for "Dry Guillotine" and Cummings for "The Enormous Room." It is no condemnation of imprisonment, however, for Dostoyevsky indicates, as later in "Crime and Punishment," that man gains spiritually from his oppressions.
As the fetters fall off the convict author at the conclusion of the book, he writes, "Freedom, new life, resurrection from the dead... What a glorious moment!"
Here is another in the Laurel paperback series, which more than either Signet or Bantam appears to be bringing not just the familiar titles but titles which provide a wider understanding of the important writers.
Castro's 'Rumple' Is 'Tailor Made'
NEW YORK — (UPI) — That rumpled look beneath Cuban Premier Fidel Castro's beard strictly is tailor made, says one New York haberdasher.
Peter F. Lynch, president of A Sulka & Co., said he's been advised that Castro's casually worn army fatigues actually are custom made.
A poet can survive everything but a misprint. —Oscar Wilde
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