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University Daily Kansan Wednesday,Dec. 11. 1957
The Crow And The Firecracker: A Modern Fable
Once upon a time there was a very rich and talkative crow named Yank Crow that lived in a forest not far enough away. The crow talked in the daytime and in the nighttime. He talked all the time. In addition to his wealth, he had the biggest set of crow muscles in the woods and he talked about them too.
The crow was always losing friends because of his high-toned ways.
Now there lived in this same forest a chicken hawk named Ivan Chicken Hawk who was the enemy of the crow and when the crow lost friends they would become the chicken hawk's friends. This bothered the crow because he wanted to be well liked but didn't know how. So he hired a starling named John Foster Sillybird to go to all the denizens of the forest and try to buy their friendship.
Mr. Sillybird was quite a sight as he flew all over the giant forest with his fat sack of money. The little animals would take the money, then they would laugh at Mr. Sillybird and draw moustaches on pictures of Mr. Sillybird in magazines. This didn't bother him. He felt they were all dumber than he was and it didn't matter if they laughed. Well, things got progressively worse till Ivan Chicken Hawk was out-thinking and out-propagandizing Yank Crow from dawn to dusk.
One day Yank Crow was moping around trying to figure out how to win back his friends, when he had a brilliant idea. He decided he would build a huge firecracker and invite all the animals to the explosion. He knew it would take him some time to make the firecracker so in the meantime he talked about what an explosion it would be and what a good firecracker maker he was.
Some of the animals thought if Yank Crow spent more time working on the firecracker and less time talking it would be a better forest to live in. But that wasn't Yank's opinion. He talked in the daytime and in the nighttime. He talked all the time.
One day shortly before Yank Crow was due to set off his firecracker he heard a tremendous explosion from over the hill, near Ivan Chicken Hawk's perch house. Soon all the little animals came running back and told Yank Crow that while he had been talking, Ivan Chicken Hawk had built the most fantabulous firecracker ever. Some of the little animals didn't even bother to come and see Yank Crow, they just sniggered.
Well, that didn't bother Yank Crow. He blithely shrugged his shoulders and said it didn't matter, that it was the science of firecracker making that mattered, and anyway, just wait until his went off.
The day arrived when Yank Crow said he would set off the firecracker. All the little animals were listening. Yank Crow had a flair for the dramatic so he sat in the top of the biggest tree in the forest and started what he called the count-off—this was a kind of P. T. Barnum way of saying, "I'm going to light the fuse." Well, the stunt didn't work so well the first day because the wind kept blowing Yank Crow's matches out.
So, not to be outwitted by the weather, Yank Crow said that at exactly such-and-such a time in the near future he would strike a match and all the animals would hear the big bang. Some of the little animals thought this was a dodge and a stall but they decided to listen at such-and-such a time anyway.
Not one to save his breath. Yank Crow ballyhooed the firecracker some more. He talked in the daytime and in the nighttime. He talked all the time.
The big day arrived. The wonderful firecracker was sitting on a big rack and Yank Crow had a pocket full of wind-proof firecracker lighters. All the little animals, and even a few big ones were gathered around waiting for the big bang. Yank lit a wind-proof firecracker lighter and set fire to the long fuse of the beautiful firecracker. The fuse popped and sputtered and everyone got ready for the tremendous bang.
The fuse burned shorter and shorter. Yank Crow was still talking. All the little animals were listening. Pretty soon the fuse burned completely down and everyone, except for a stuttering beaver, put their hands to their ears. They waited and waited. Nothing happened.
Yank Crow began to talk. Everyone said, "I didn't hear nothing nohow." That is, everyone except the stuttering beaver. He said, "I heard it. It went s-s-nap. How's come it didn't go B-B-Baroom?" Yank Crow told him to shut up.
The crowd of little animals began to break up and some left for Ivan Chicken Hawk's perch to tell him about the fiasco. Yank Crow began to talk, but no one was listening to him. So he called in John Foster Sillybird and gave him another sack of money.
Moral: Much outcry, little outcome.
—John Eaton
College Educations Too Specialized?
The college has received a grant of $100,000 from the Carnegie Foundation to establish the courses for a three-year program. Three such courses will be offered. One will be conducted in each of the college's three divisions—the humanities, the social sciences, and the physical sciences.
CLAREMONT, Calif. - (IP) - In answer to the contention that college educations are becoming too specialized, Pomona College has launched an experiment this year with divisional courses for its seniors.
Gettysburg College Adds Honor System
GETTYSBURG, Pa. — (IP)— All examinations, term papers, reports, laboratory work, and homework are included in the newly installed honor system, according to a report by the Gettysburg College honor commission.
Fraternity files will now include only past examinations. The faculty will not proctor any tests unless it is necessary. Professors will make themselves available for any questions at the beginning of the exams and then inform the class where they can be contacted during the exam for questioning. The commission suggests the professor then retire to his office.
The oldest known map is a clay tablet made in Babylonia about 2300 B. C., according to Rand McNally's Atlas of World History.
The first U. S. patent was issued to Samuel Hopkins of Burlington, Vt., July 31, 1790 on a process for making pot and pearl ashes.
Only a senior will be eligible to take one of the courses, and he may take only the course offered in the division in which he is concentrating. The courses will offer three units of credit per semester.
from the 1880's to the 1930's will be considered in the humanities course, "Turning Points of Western Culture." The social science seminar on "The Individual and the New Leviathan," will be devoted to problems of large-scale organization in economics and government and the individual's relationship in the changing society. The natural science course on "Turning Points in Physical Science" will consider the evaluation of scientific theory.
The courses will cross boundaries of academic fields. Instructors of history, English, and art will teach the courses in the humanities division. Economics, government and philosophy faculty will teach the social science course, and philosophy, physics and chemistry teachers will instruct the natural sciences course.
The cultural history of Europe
The courses will concentrate on raising questions in the student's mind, rather than on giving him all the answers. Instructors will insist on making comparisons between fields to challenge beliefs which have been uncritically taken for granted. The courses will emphasize that lines of demarcation between academic fields are tentative and conditional.
University of Kansas student newspaper
1904, trieweekly 1908, daily, Jan. 16, 1912
Dalilu Transan
UNIVERSITY
Extension 251, news room
Extension 376, business office
Member Inland Daily Press Association.
Associated Collegiate Press. Represented
National Advertising Service. Service
Madison Square Garden. New
service: United Press. Mail subscription
rates: $3 a semester or $4.50 a year. Pub-
nishment noon during the University year except
Saturdays and Sundays. University holidays,
and examination periods. Entered
as second-class matter Sept. 17, 1910, at
March 3, 1879.
NEWS DEPARTMENT
Bob Lyle ___ Managing Editor
NEWS DEPARTMENT
Marilyn Mermis, Jim Banman, Richard Brown, Ray Wingerson, Assistant Managing Editors: Bob Hartley, City Editor; Carol Miller, City Editor; Leroy Zimmerman, Telegraph Editor; Nancy Harmon, Assistant Telegraph Editor; George Anthan, Malcolm Applegate, Sports Editors; Mary Bray, Sports Editor; Martha Crossler, Assistant Society Editor.
BUSINESS DEPARTMENT
Harry Turner Business Manager
Keneltz,elz, Advertising Manager; Jere
Glover George Pester, Classified Advertising
Manager; Martha Billingsley, Assistant
Classified Advertising Manager Ted
Winkler Caiman Manager; Steve
Schmidt, Promotion Manager
EDITORIAL DEPARTMENT
Yes, we have a studio where you may make recordings for Christmas Presents.
Larry Boston ... Editorial Editor
Jason Del Haley, Jim Siedd, Ass-
sociate Editors.
Solos or Groups
When You're In Doubt, Try It Out—Kansan Classified Section.
A Hallmark
COLOR MOVIE
"The Art of Gift Wrapping"
will be shown at 4 P.M. AND 7:30 P.M. THURSDAY, DEC.12
Student Union Trophy Room FREE ADMISSION-FREE REFRESHMENTS
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Student Union Ballroom 9-12 Friday, Dec. 13th.
Tickets per Couple
At the Information Booth & Student Union Ticket Office Sponsored by the International Club
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2 Things To Do Before Vacation:
21
Let Morgan-Mack check the brakes on your car. If tightening or relining is needed, our trained mechanics will do the job well.
Let them check the tires for alignment, cuts,and possible breaks. Remember - play it safe on the highway.
MORGAN-MACK
Your Ford Dealer in Lawrence
714 VERMONT DIAL VI 3-3500