UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN Official student paper of the Univer- EDITORIAL STAFF Wilbur Fischer. . . . . . Editor-In-Chief Chas Survantavec. . . . . . Associate Editor James Hammers. . . . . . Associate Editor Zetha Hammer. . . . . . News Editor Miles Vaughn. . . . . . Assistant Alexander Warnock. . . . . . Assistant BUSINESS STAFF William Cady...Business Manager Hana, Suaventu...Adv. Marcus...Mgr. REPORTORIAL Paul Rinald Jon Glasser Lieferlapper Don Davis Halp Elsa Ellen Johnson John Gloasner STAFF Harry Morgan Guy Serviller Charles Sweet Charles Sweet Glenm Swogger Lloyd Whiteside Subscription price $3.00 per year in advance; one term, $1.75. Entered as, second-class mail mat- ten to office of Lawrence, Kansas, under the office at Lawrences. Published in, the afternoon two versities of Kansas, from the press of Kansas. Address a. communications to UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN Lawrence, Kansas Phone, Bell K. U. 25. Th• Daily Kansan aims to picture the understated of Kansas; to go further than merely printing the text on Kansas; to go further than the University holds; to play no favorites; to be clean; to be cheerful; to be charitable; to be honest; to solve serious problems to wiser heads, in all, to serve the students; to identify the university of the University. TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 29, 1916 Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar Mark Twain THOSE SHOWERS AGAIN Adam and Eve had many adventures that one was that they escaped teething. THESE SHOWS HAVE "It isn't my fault." "I wasn't officially notified." "It's up to the other fellow." These are the remarks one hears when he inquires why students are subjected to a stream of boiling hot—or freezing cold—water in Robinson Gymnasium. Many complaints have been heard from the men students, yet nothing has been done. Many masculine voices have been heard in the gymnasium, exclaiming, "We want water!" The proper authorities should take note of these "little" things whether officially notified or not. THAT WATER QUESTION It would be interesting to know just how many people voted to keep the chapel hour at eight o'clock, in order to avoid eight o'clock classes next semester. The question as to whether or not it is best for the City of Lawrence to buy the water system at the price of $175,000 is one that many of the voters of the city are asking. Many think that the plant in its present condition is not worth the price in spite of the fact that several competent engineers say that it is. It is a fact that the standpipe, settling basins and some of the machinery of the company is useless for a well improved system, and the company is selling this dead material to the city at a rather high figure. Others think that the company will sell in a few years at a much lower figure than $175,000. Others doubt this, for very few men are willing to give away their stocks and bonds until it is absolutely necessary. The stock and bonds amount to $240,000. One thing is certain—the city of Lawrence is not protected from large fires. Under the present system, the company can not throw more than four large streams of water fifty feet high. All who know, agree that this would not control a large fire. Not only this, but a flood such as the one in 1903 or in 1908 would leave the city for weeks without any protection at all, because the pumping plant would be under water and totally crippled. A city with a tax valuation of more than $13,000,000 can not afford to permit such a condition to exist. Nearly every city in Kansas that has tried to install a competing plant has failed to get the desired results and eventually had to buy out the private company. The Lawrence company is not living up to its part of the franchise, but in order to get action on it the city has to go through a long term of court. That means time and money. Something ought to be done at once and, according to the best authority, 'he surest, quickest and cheapest way is for the city to purchase the present company and install a system that will protect the city from dangerous fires. The predicament of the present senior class, which finds itself near the end of its last year without one-half of its memorial fund collected, should serve as an example to the first and second year classes and the classes that are to come. The senior memorial fund at present consists of about $200 and to buy the sort of gift for the University which the class feels it should, will require at least $400. This means that in approximately two months the class must raise what it should have done in three years, and that the memorial, which has not yet been decided upon, will have to be rushed to completion as soon as the money is raised—if it is raised. BEGIN MEMORIALS EARLY The hole in which the class finds itself is another shining example of the inefficiency of University politics. The chairman of the memorial committee last year did not collect a single penny. He got his job because he supported the man who was president of last year's class, and not because he wanted it, or because he was the best fitted in his class to hold the place. In the sophomore year the chairman did slightly better and collected $20. So far this year about $180 have been raised and if the class is to reach the $400 mark which it has set for itself, Chairman Harold Mack will have to step lively in the next few weeks. The memorial fund should be complete by the end of the first semester and the majority of it should be collected during the first three years of the life of the class. If the chairman of the committee does not work he should be fired and the job given to somebody who will conscientiously do the work. WHAT OTHERS SAY WE ALL DO IT "Hey, take the Gym towel out of your pocket!" "Ob, ha-ha!" Thought it was my handkerchief." The Yale Record WILL K. U. PROFESSORS KINDLY NOTE? "Gentlemen, in closing my lecture, I wish once more to deplore the fact that so little time at Yale is given to the priceless art of leisure and conversation. Our next lesson will be from page 143 to page 372 of the text; also the posted collateral reading. Let me remind you that essays are due Tuesday." Isn't that conclusive proof that profs are the same the whole world round? An Arab stood on a weighing machine At the end of a lingering day; A counterfeit penny he dropped in the slot "My love," said the beaver, passionately, "come and live in my newly built house in the stream." For a moment the beaver maid was silent, then, coily slapping her tail on the bank, she whispered: "Then you do give a dam for me after all."—California Polican. The Yale Record. And silently stole a-weigh. —The Yale Record. "That's the way I intended to look, Jack—"Tiger. "Yes Jones is a prominent member of our fraternity." "My dear, you look sweet enough to kiss." "What do you charge for your rooms?" LIGHTS OUT "What is his official capacity?" "Oh, several gallons."-Siren. "Then it's five dollars down."— Cornell Widow. "Five dollars up." "But I'm a student—" Send the Daily Kansas home to the folks. "But I'm a student—" PROM.—Tune Pantoum. "Another?" How nice! Number nine! "My goodness, just look at my hair!" "Yes." "My, what is a wonderful floor!" she said, "I have no idea, me." "I've never been up here, before?" she continued. "It must be a new floor." Prom. talk is certainly Art! Or "I'll just go out to do the door!" "Of course Jones may have part?" "Oh, that's right." The orchestra's perfectly fine. "You say, those are Freshmen up you?" Second and third score two mile walk through city parks. The senior class of Washburn College is considering the raising of an endowment fund toward which each student will pledge $100. on say "those are freshmen up" "What is that?" Is that the Yale shell? "My goodness, just look at my hair!" "I'm having the 'of' my I." "My godresses, just look at my hair!" "You say those are Freshmen, un "That thing?" Is that the Yale shell? "I thinkige boys must have such harks!" Two girls' debates have been arranged between the Indians and DePauw University. "I hear you get wonderful marks." "You college boys must have such laks." An old timer, who spins yarns in a down town barber shop, is responsible for this bit of information. "Keeping your boots blacked don't pay," he says, "because you can use them for six months and it wore out fifteen minutes before the other one." "Of course Mr. Jones may have part." Nevertheless along about this time of year those "fusser"们 hibernate during the winter aren't even satisfied with home-made shines. On the eve of an engagement at the movies ("date") is now becoming a normal sum, he will borrow forty-five cents and "shag" down to one of those parlors where they rub shinola on your shoes for a nickle. But woe to the fellow who drops into a shine-while-you-wait "joint" laterly come to town with its brass drummed up. The result could best be presented by a "one real" tracedly. The title of this shoe shining scene is buried deep in the action of the film. At the present time its brief form is, "Says he, because don't you future shows are so treason and,Oh," just look at the wonderful moon. So we're again passing through the siege of a beauty contest, one of those short, sweet drawnout sieges when beauty is put upon the block at a penny a vote and sold to the highest bidder. WILL WE GROW UP? e Daily Kansan: "Tulip Time in Holland," wafted to ears of passing stude. Enters. Dark follow with big bushy head of hair strides rapidly forward. Student reads several evening papers for suitable joke to spring on co-ed. Shoe manicurist opens up second can of blackening and gives worn out shoes sixth coat. Student looks at scruff, while wearing a cap and ejects corn. Refects on price of shinola and becomes ashamed to give man five cent piece. Decides to herd date by sweet shop. Shinola Sam puts hand over shoulder to scolle the "America I Love You." Student's heart throb with emotion. Descendent of Demosthenes gives shoes final touch and painfully brushes crumbs from glances at "kicks," apparently new, and is overcome with gratitude. Greek looks into student's watery eyes with a "so help me God expression." The knowledge absorber chases down the student's scribbles says, "Keep the change, I was poor once myself." CAMPUS OPENING Community members are invited to a evidence of good faith but names will not be published. A registration form will be available online at www.campus.org. WHILE MOON AND BOOTS SHINE Scene one: Prom talk is certainly Art. -Yale Record. "I hear you get wonderful marks." CAMPUS OPINION The University of Kansas in her fiftieth year should be striving to take on the appearance of being down customers that she would be glad in the years to come to honor as traditions. Yet we find the holders of the purse strings for many high school girls to the time honored high-school custom of holding a beauty contest. It's the wise press agent that knows what will arouse the interest of the readers by his notes he pipes through the byways and highways and because he picks upon the popular strings of the vanities of humanity his following is large; and being large he shakes the coffers of his following and grows fat with money. Tell a woman she's beautiful, and she will look twice in her mirror. The managers of the Senior Book are telling the twenty-six "Kansas Beauties" that they are beautiful and that their friends should make every effort to help them be the most beautiful. If the contest is a good thing, why not give every student a chance to determine Orend's most beautiful? If merely a business proposition, extend the contest to cover the handsome man, the student, the hardie, the hardiest working "boy," etc. "Let the work go on." Did You Take advantage of the suggestions made in the "Tomorrow's Best Bargain" column in the Kansan of yestrday? Look at it today and see where you can purchase both necessities and luxuries at a lower cost. The articles mentioned are for your benefit and you are the loser if you don't take advantage of the prices offered. The copy for the Gustafson Ad Prize Contest must be in the office of the Daily Kansan before Wednesday noon, March 1. There's $5.00 in trade for the winner. Look at the Good "Buys" for Tomorrow WANT ADS FOR RENT—Nice large furnished room for boys. $12.00 per month for two. Call Bell 9653. 97-5. WANTED -Young man or woman with teaching experience to do educational work during their vacation. Salary paid. Address W. M. Hughes. 28 Columbian Building, Topeka, Kansas. 100-3 FOR RENT-A 13 room furnished fraternity house; close to University and down town. South and East from front office location. Call 1466W 102-3* LOST — A bunch of keys some place near Gymnasium last Thursday night. Fred Pausch, 745 Louisiana. Phone 444. FOUND—A Conklin fountain pen. Owner may redeem same by calling at the Kansan office and paying for this notice. 103-3 EXPERT BARBERS STUDENTS SHOE SHOP 1107 Mass. St., Lawrence, Kansas. Work and Prices Always Right We also Repair and Cover Parasols R. O. BURGERT, Prop. At Your Service College Inn Barber Shop BURT WADHAMS, Prop. FOR SHINES THAT LAST GUARANTEED HAT WORK Try the New Shoe Shining Parlor & Hat Works At 833 Mass. St. Corona and Fox Typewriters are sold exclusively in Lawrence by F. I. Carter, 1025 Mass. St. We have machines for rent and a full line of supplies. University Girls Send the Daily Kansan home to the fclks. We repair and remodel coats, furs and party dresses. This work is done in a special department installed in reception with our millinery business. MRS. J. R. McCORMICK, 831 Mass. eof-tf A. C. GIBSON Coal Coal Coal Both Phones 23. Deliveries LAWRENCE PANTATORIUM Tel. 506 Bell. 12 W. Warren. For the latest in commercial and society printing call on A. G. Alrich A. G. Alrich 743 Mass. St. Watkins National Bank Capital $100,000 Surplus and Profits $100,000 The Student Depository PROTSCH Johnson & Tuttle The College Tailor A Good Place to Eat Anderson's Old Stand 715 MASSACHUSETTS STREET Book Store CLASSIFIED KEELEER'S BOOK STORE, 293 Mass. St. Typewriters for sale or rent. Used for office supplies. Paper by the pound. Quokka book, 10c. Pictures and Picture framing. Jewelers ED, W. PAIRSOM, Engraver, Watch- tore, Bell phone 711. 717 MASS. Phone 711. 717 MASS. MISS ESTELLA NORFURPE, PHONE MISS ESTELLA NORFURPE, PHONE MISS ESTELLA NORFURPE, PHONE MISS ESTELLA NORFURPE, PHONE MISS ESTELLA NORFURPE, PHONE Shoe Shop Plumbers K. U. SHOE SHOP and Pantatorium is the best place for best results 1242 Ohio PHONE KENNER PLUMBING CO. 852-731-4000 MASSA Maxda Lamps. 852-731-4000 Massa. Phone 852-731-4000 Printing B. H. DALLE, Artistic Job Printing. Both phones 228, 1027 Mass. FORNERY SHOE SHOP. 1017 Mass. St. of a mistake. All work guaranteed. MUNS A., MA. MORGAN H321 *Tennessee*, A. MORGAN, H321 *Tennessee* *turingKing*, *pervious*, very reasonable *turingKing*. PROFESSIONAL CARDS DR. H. L. CHAMBERS. Office over Squires' studio. Both phones. HARRY REIDING, M. D. Eye, Eyes, Nose, Tongue, Ears, Hands, Face, Nose, Eyes, Hands, G. W. JONES, A. M. M. D. D. Disease Bachelor's degree in Public Health, 1891 Ohio 6th St. Kiel- sau. Phone: 814-754-3000 J. R. BECHTER, M. D. D. O. 832 Maxs Both phones use real and de- real. C. WILSON, Attorney at law 743 Mass. St. Lawrence, Kansas. DR. H. W. HUTCHNSON, Dentist. 3081 Perkins Bldg. Lawrence, Kansas. C. O'REILLY M.P. D. D.ick Bldr. Eyes B. O'REILLY M.P. D. D.ick Bldr. Eyes Granted, guaranteed. Successor to D. Harman Send the Daily Kansan home. Conklin Fountain Pens Non-Leakable and Self-Filling F. B. McColloch's Drug Store 847 Mass, St. See Griffin Coal Company for Fuel.