UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN Official student paper of the University of Kansas. EDITORIAL STAFF Maximus - upper Marcus - lower Michael - middle William Cady - Exchange Editor BUSINESS STAFF Business Manager Chas. Sturtevant... Advertising Mgr REPORTORIA Vernon John M. Gleissner J. M. Miller J. Michael McCann Carolyn McNutt Jonathan Morgan Harry Morgan Fred Bowen Richard Kerman Zetha Hammer Jason Heller Guy Servrier Charles Sweet Kevin Glendon Alvine Robert Chester Chester Fatterson Ames Rogers John Cargill Sproull Subscription price $3.00 per year in advance; one term, $1.75. Entered as second-elast. mail mnt- tle to: 518-200-3750, office of lawsuits, Kansas, under the Attorney General's supervision. Published in, the afternoon, two yesterday. Kansas from the press of the New York Times. Kansas from the press of the New York Times. Address all communications to UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN Lawrence, Kansas. Phone. Bell K. U. 25. The Daily Kansan aims to picture the undergraduate students to go further than merely printing the news, and to provide University faculty to play no favorites; to be clean; to be cheerful; to be courageous; to have more serious problems to wiser heads, in all, to face them; to help the students of the University. WEDNESDAY, SEPT. 22, 1915. With temperance, health, cheerfulness, friends, a chosen task, one pays the cheapest fees for living and may well dispense with other physicians.—A Bronson Acott. FRESHMAN DISCIPLINE Freshmen are beginning to be initiated into the rites of the infant clan. Worthy agitation has been started to prevent their making dates for football games. Freshmen mean well enough in making dates for football games, but the trouble is that they have been feasted and courted for a week and it is only natural that they should begin to consider themselves competent to manage their own social affairs. This of course is an unwarranted assertion as any upperclassman will readily admit. Freshmen need someone to hold them down in the matter of making dates. If it were not for such activity as this anti-date propargana, freshmen would be making dates for the night-shirt parade. So the fatherly upper-classman, who never, never take a date to a football game, have to warn their freshmen to lead the simple life. TO BEAT MISSOURI For the benefit of those who are new among us let it be understood that this is the year that K. U. is going to make Missouri sick of football. Those who are returning need scarcely be reminded of that fact. Of course the exact score cannot be determined at this time but the thing that can be, in fact has been, determined is that the "Tiger" will spend the Thanksgiving recess nursing a twisted and knotted tail. Of course there is a joker in every deck and therefore there is a provision to the above. If you want said defeat administered to the old gold and black get out and watch the practice. That's the big thing now. Let the fellows out on the gridiron know that the rest of the school is out there watching them and pulling for them to do their best. No secret practice now. You Mr. Student are welcome to watch at any time. Do it! Know every man out there and where he plays. Don't wait until the first game and then ask your neighbor. Be down there every afternoon so that the squad will know that the student body is behind them and will be there all the time until the final whistle ends the Missouri game and a victorious season. "I don't like New York and I do like Kansas—that's why I came here," said Coach Olcott in an interview. That one statement has already caused the student body to want to do something for him. "I never saw such a man as you are. I really believe you hate yourself." "Well, why shouldn't I? My mother is English and my father is German." -Puck. STUDENT OPINION HEARS K. U. CRITICIZED Editor Daily Kansas; Is K. U. pepless? Is K. U. cold and unsociable, and lastly, is she controlled by a factional element? That is what many people are saying and consequently scores from Kansas City and other towns just beyond the University of Missouri this year. An Old Grad from Kansas City is on this week and brings this on until You know we don't believe this, but it would be a good idea to keep in mind what others think of us, and we must do everything to be an undesirable one try and change it. The Old Grad says he has heard K. U. "raked over the coals" for the past two or three years and he wants to know if we, here at school, are the real cause of it. He says the high school graduates have been told that what little student activities were not suppressed by the faculty, the other part is controlled by cliques and crooked political gangs. Old Grad says these things hurt, of course, but he incidentally mentioned that M. U.'s idea of advertising also had much to do in pulling students. Most every year either the Missouri band or glee club, or both, visit the Kansas City schools and give a short concert which is always followed by a glowing tribute to the school. "Just this kind of a program takes the eyes of the ordinary high school senior," concluded the Old Grad. "But please don't forget that false idea that is gradually growing up in Kansas City and other border cities about this grand old school. I believe it is up to the students themselves to see that this school is girded in the light that it should be." P E P APPROVES HOSPITAL FEE Editor Daily Kansan: The state Board of Administration will find the student body for it in its action on the new hospital plan. New students take the fee as a matter of course and old students must become accustomed to it. Those that have been half cared for in their rooms during sickness in previous years are willing to call the two dollars the minimum. Two dollars is less than the average doctor's bill per student for the school year and at the same time insures against any higher bills and gives us the best medical attention. The fee came unexpectedly and of course canned a comment. Whether it was a legal question, but outside of the irritated home physicians I think it has found but little bitter criticism and has almost unanimously been received warmly by the students. Satisfied. Expert dental work at cost prices may be secured by students at the Infirmary beginning today. The plan provides that students having work done shall pay for materials used in the work and a flat time rate to cover salaries and overhead expenses. Appointments for work may be made at any time at the office of the Infirmary. Hours from 9 to 5 p.m. daily except Sunday—University Californian. FREE DENTAL WORK AT CALI FORNIA U. Hezekiah Mirschbaum says that the woman who talks incessantly about "touring the country in our house" is a husband whose firm owns a Ford. He—What makes that fellow glare at me so? She-'We're sitting on his ice cream.-Yale Record. Stranger—Is your local paper read? Citizen—No, it's a typical yellow journal. THE VISIONARY Engaged along the border. —Cornelil Widow. Professor—Can you name a liquid which won't freeze? Now that the war started Silent is the house; all are laid naise One is the door; o'er the snow Wreaths dreal, they say the 'French and German They say the 'French and German Stewed—Hot water, sir—Cornel Widow. wreaths deep. Watching every cloud, d-eading every Cheerful is the hearth, soft the matted floor; That whirls the wildering drift an bends the groaning trees. Not on delivering gust creeps through, wane or door. The little lamp burns straight; it rays shoot short and far; it pane or door; the little lamb burns straight; its I trim it well, to be the wanderer's guilding star, guilding star, siren of fire; siren Of my Frown, my haughty, sir! Chide, ma angry dame; Set your slaves to spy; threaten ma with shame; But neither sire nor dame nor prying soft shall know **serf shall know** What angel night tracks that waste their breath. What angel nightly tracks that waste What I love shall come like visitant What I love shall come like visitant of air Safety power from lurking human snare? What loves me no word of mine shall Though for faith unstained my life Burn, little lamp; gilmore strut, little lamp; Hush! a rustling wing stirrs, methinks For he whom I wait, thus ever comes Strange Power! I trust thy might; Strange Power! Flotsam and Jetsam OUR BOW trust thou my constancy. Emily Bronte. "Gondal Ballads." With some trepidation we approach the task of inaugurating a "columny," the like of which "never was on land or sea." We are keenly aware of the responsibility devolving upon those who would stir the riabilities of their fellow beings and we at the first suggestion of the thing to be done must be that of certain letters dissipated our reluctance. With the exception of two of the following these commendations are unsolicited. Editor. Flotsam and Jetsam; Washington, D. C. Dear Sir; With extreme gratification we in the White House heard of your intention to start a column in the Daily Kansan. It will be watched with interest here. Please send a marked copy to Herr von Jagow, Berlin, occasionally. Perhaps it will make his notes to us lively in tone. The White House, Washington, D. C. am and Jetsam. Woodrow Wilson. Yours, Oyster Bay, New York. Editor, Flotsam and Jetsam: Dear Sir: It is as refreshing as a shower in August to read now and then in time of great national stress a column such as yours will doubless be. I would like to impress upon every American citizen the fact that the bungling work of the present administration in regard to Mexican — as I started to say, I shall look eagerly for the column each day. Yours for a larger army and an efficient navy, Theodore Roosevelt. On The Eastern Front, Editor, Flotsam and Jetsam: Dear Sir: Having pursued the Russians the daily forty miles we have entrenched for the night and I take this opportunity to thank you for the promised feature in your estimable journal. You may address our copies after Oct. 1 to Petrograd. A long line of students in front on the Registrar's office last Thursday gave rise to the rumor that they were waiting to subscribe to the Students' email list. They were an astounded even that their purpose was to pay laboratory fees. The hegira of students to Lawrence last week was noted joyfully by the "embattled farmers" of the state. They will not be able to farm without having impressed upon them daily the senses, views, nooks, maps, aluminum ware, enlarged pictures, life insurance and magazines. Von Hindenburg. "My work will not bother me this winter as I studied a great deal this summer and am in shape to plug pretty hard." "Yes, father's new car is a twelve cvilinder." "I cleaned up $500" this summer song (pipans, pain relief, picture frame) For the Tired Feeling Half Truths or Less *Add ciphers in proportion to the credulity of the other party to the conversation. L, E, S. "Three (fraternities, sororites) "he's been after me but I refused them" *all* "I prefer a hard course as one doesn't have a much time to loak." 'Ha, I will fool the bloodhounds yet," cried the fugitive heartily and slipping on a pair of rubbets, he erased his tracks—Yale Record. '18- Do you believe in infant damnation, Professor? Married Prof.-Only at night.— Penn. Punch Bowl. First old friend—Steerage—Har ard Lampoon. Second old friend—First class, how are you? On Shipboard First Old Friend—Hello, old cajn how are you? Hotel Clerk—Do you want a single voom? Country Jay—Gosh all Hemlock, are even the rooms married in the city? —Summer Session Californian. She—What did the gypsy tell you about your fortune? He—She took it and never mentioned the fact.—Summer Session Californian. "It itedn't make you so grumpy because you swallowed an ant and spit jam on your trousers and sat on a bumblebee. Good heavens! A picnic's a picnic, you know."-Iife. Your father's a Southern planter, isn't he? Yes, he's an undertaker in Mississippi—Stanford Chaparral. There was a bird (A warbler, a thrush, a robin or a jay). And soft he sang A tune, a lilt, a song or roundeiay). (The dell, the copse, the valley, date or brush) His wife replied And o'er the hill (A warbler or a robin, jay or thrush).—Harvard Lampoon. Every time Cupid aims a dart he Mrs. it—Columbia Jester. "Anhow, there's one advantage in being a wooden leg," said the vetman. "What's that?" asked his friend. "You can hold your socks up with thumb tacks."—Columbia Jester. She-I burned my fingers when I tried to put that light out. He—Well, I'll try the old-fashioned remedy of kissing it and making it kiss She (demurely) — I tried to blow it out, too. — Michigan Gargoyle. The Oral Examiner—Read those four lines. The victim—What four? The Cannibal—Because I tell you to—Harvari Lampoon. Jim—What is Bill doing now? James—He's a Post Impressionist. William—How? James-No; he's got a job with the Western Union branding numbers on the telegraph poles.—Dartmouth Jack o' Lantern. "Hello Bill what are you taking this year?" "Oh I'm taking medicine." "Why I didn't know you were even sick." - Minnesota Minnehah, WANT ADS FOR RENT-Two good rooms left for rent at 1290 Tann, street, at $8 and $10 a month. Phone 2516J. 441 Get your safety razor blades sharp ened at Evans Drug Store—Adv. LOST—Kappa Sigma fraternity pin Finder please return to Kansan office. FOR RENT-Three modern light housekeeping rooms at 1622 N. H 6-3 EARNEST REESER desires a room- mate. Call at Professor Downing's residence. 946 La. 6-3 FOR RENT—Fine upstairs rooms, suitable for light housekeeping or for single rooms for boys. House new and modern. Phone 2615 W. Bell. FOR RENT-Large front room for two boys. Call Bell 914. FOR RENT-A furnished room for boys; electric light and furnace heat. Mrs. Dean, 1331 Ky. 2568 B. PROFESSIONAL CARDS Harry Reding, M. D. Eye, ear, nose and throat. Glasses fitted. Office. F. A. U. Bldg. Phones, Bell 513; Home 512. G. A. Hammam, M. D. Dick Building- Eye, ear and throat specialist. Glasses fitted. Satisfaction guar- uated. CLASSIFIED Jewelers Ed. W. Parsons, Engraver, Watchman and Jeweler. Diamonds and Jewelry. Bell phone 717. 717 Mass. Street. A. G. ALRICH PRINTING Plumbers Phone Kennedy Plumbing Co., for gas goods and Mazda Lamps. 937 Mass. Phones 658. Binding, Copper Plate Printing, Rubber Stamps, Engraving, Steel Die Embossing, Seals, Badges. 744 MASS, STREET PRINTING Mrs. Emma D. Schulz Ladies Tailoring and Dress Making Alternations of all Descriptions 13 Mass. St. Bell Phone 914 FRITH COLUMBUS GOOD FOR PRESSING F. A. OWEN & SON 105 MANST ST. Sacramento TN Bollighouse Cleaning House Address Good For PRESSING ONLY GOOD FOR PRESSING ONLY A Good Place to Eat Johnson & Tuttle Watkins National Bank Capital $100,000 Surplus and Profits $100,000 The Student Depository Anderson's Old Stand -715 MASSACHUSETTS STREET F. R. OWEN & SON CLEANING and PRESSING 1024 Mass. Phones 510 These coupons issued to students at the following prices: CLARK LEANS LOTHES Phone 355 Book of 10 presses $1.00 Book of 35 presses 3.00 Book of 75 presses 6.00 Discount to clubs of five or more PUNCH $1.50 TEN TICKET PRESSES CLARK LEANS LOTHES CLARK LEANS LOTHES All Pressing Done by Hand 730 Mass. St. CLARK LEANS LOTHES Honestly, Now— As one student to another. Wouldn't the folks at home appreciate your thoughtfulness if you would arrange with us to mail them a Daily Kansan each day? Wouldn't they grow more and more interested in K. U. if they received the daily letter? Ask any one of the hundred who sent the Kansan home last year. It's a good invsetment. - - - - -