UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Official student paper of the Univer- city of Kansas
Today's number edited by students of the department of journalism.
Gilbert Clayton . . . Editor-in-Chief
Earl Crable . . . Managing Editor
Subscription price $2.60 per year in advance; one term, $1.50.
Entered as second-class mail matter September 17, 1910, at the post office at Lawrence, Kansas, under the act of March 3, 1879.
Published in the afternoon five times a week, by students of the University of Kansas, from the press of the Department of Journalism.
Address all communications to
UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS
Lawrence, Kansas.
Phone, Bell K. U. 25,
TUESDAY, MARCH 30, 1915.
And one of the scribes came, and heard them questioning together, and knowing that he had answered them well, so he said, "I shall command it." A fleet of all?"
Jesus answered, "The first is, 'Hear O Israel; The Lord our God, the Lord is one; and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength." The second is, "There is nothing greater than thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these."
And the scribe said unto him, "Of a truth, Teacher, thou hast well said that he is one: and there is none other but he; he and to love him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength, and to love his neighbor as himself, is much more than all who burnt-offruits and sacrifices.
And when Jesus saw that he answered discreetly, he said unto him, "Thou art not far from the kingdom of God." CONVINCATION 1915 YEARS AGO TODAY.
ON RECENT HOSPITALITY
University of Kansas, congratulations!
You served the people of your state right well Friday and Saturday when it sent it high school boys and girls to Lawrence. You entertained forty-eight basketball teams from Kansas high schools; you took an interest in the games and stood on the side lines and encouraged somebody to win; you told the visitors about the University and made them feel at home. You did this because you grew up here because your part was that of host. When the visitors and their forty-eight teams tell of "Impressions at K. U." in high school chapels this week University stock is bound to go up.
* * *
If any group is to be singled out for special felicitations it is the Big Sisters. They did not permit a high school girl to be left alone long enough to come home. The Big Sisters proved themselves hospitable daughters of K. U.
. . . .
High school boys and girls, you came—forty-eight teams of you—but only two of you conquered; that's the way it had to be. Only two teams carried away the title, "ever victorious." But all of you, every last one, took back to your separate high schools the good will and continued interestedness of the men and women of your University. You played your part well; you won or lost, as the case may have been as an audience team to win or lose—with good grace always. The message K. U. wants you to turn in at the announcement desk is this, "Another team to K. U. next year." For yourselves, come again, always you are welcome.
A "ONE" GUARANTEED
Realizing our own desperate pligh and desiring, as usual, to be of service to our readers, we make public today a guaranteed prescription for the passing of any and all college examination. We have operated upon rules for years and have found them infallible. Here they are:
1. Sit in the front row and listen hungrily to his wonderful lectures.
2. Disagree judiciously; be even more careful to agree with discrimination.
3. Confess your life ambition is to follow in his line of work.
4. On the last day, buzz up and teach her "how much you've enjoyed the meal."
5. Confer with him constantly before and after class. Time yourself if possible so as to walk part of the way to the Hill with him.
6. If he is a more instructor al-
one unconsciously address him as
"Professor."
7. Express surprise that his hobby will be the same as yours. Then "could you help me?"
8. if all ends in disaster and you
o take the "ex," write confidently,
toss up an eraser on dubious optional
items and just "ream" out your stuff.
9. After the test discuss "intelligently" the examination questions
and insidiously implant the seeds of your own ideas in his puny brain.
PURPOSE OF COLLEGE LIFE
President Hadley of Yale has uttered recently some pregnant words on college men and college women. He says: "A boy goes to college not wholly for the sake of pursuing certain studies but for certain traditional rewards of undergraduate life, of entering societies that his father has chosen, or of being the successors of certain men, whom his father has met. Such an atmosphere, and such intangible opportunities cannot be created in a day."
A FABLE
Once upon a time there was a Student who didn't take much Interest in Anything. He didn't go to the Basketball Games or the Baseball Games, he didn't care for Football Games and Track Meet, he didn't read the Daily Kansan, he didn't care to join any Clubs, he didn't do anything he didn't have to do. One day as he was walking through the Park, a little red Squirrel saw him. The Squirrel sat up on its hammers and looked at him. Then he asked, "How tall are you? It followed him for a hundred yards or so. The Student turned around, saw the Squirrel and Blushed. Then he grew very Angry, and threw a Stone at it. But the Stone throwing Stunt did not Fool the Squirrel.
Moral: How wonderful is electricity!
The University Oklahoman remarks that the University of Kansas seems to have the jinx on basketball as does Nebraska on football. "Wit-ness" pushes the champion up for the against time," remarks the Sooner player.
According to Morris Patton, the foot and mouth disease is bad enough, but it is nothing in comparison with the other diseases. It is driving most people these days.
PERSONAL—If the young man a
PERSONAL—If the young man at the corner of Tennessee and Adams who practises the cornet at six in the morning will call at the Daily Kansas office he will learn something to his advantage. 3-29-tf.
If you don't play baseball or tennis,
or do not enjoy spring poetry, or find
yourself unable to get a date for a
party, don't be surprised if the rise
to inquire, is there left to do?
The Indiana election judges who let one negro vote ten times on the same day cannot be accused of race discrimination.
We are of the opinion that whatever the "findings" are of the Citizen Committee on Lawrence water, they won't be clear.
The Child Welfare Institute has endorsed college athletes. Wonder what its opinion is on pensions for superannuated pastors!
D. Drurt. says that "Play is the Key to Real Scholarship." If that is so then it must be that the lock's rusty at K. U.
Certain classes of people are especially proficient at making mistakes. The medics, for example, pull a lot of bones.
. Did you ever take your girl to a basketball game and stand next to some fellow she had known back home?
Just because some other fellow is enrolling in a snap course, is no reason you should. He may be encoring in it.
College students are constantly pulling off some kid stunts. Lately they have been having the numps.
A Port William colored women who has weak eyes says she is going to "insult an toplist."
Paradoxical as it may seem the bar-flies are glad the anti-screen law failed to pass the Missouri legislature.
The milk of human kindness can not be had for a nickel at a dairy lunch.
It is quite true that a rounder is seldom square.
Slavs to Polish Heights—Headline With Dutch Cleaner, maybe?
Those who say "may" to everything
do not necessarily have horse sense
FOR A NICHE IN MEMORY
What-so-ever you think in the heart of you
I have been watching the war map
in front of the newspaper offi-
cies.
Will be written in every part of you
in your hands, in your feet, in your
body.
Birds of a feather flunk together.
In its deepest depths, in its innost parts
BUTTONS
Buttons—red and yellow backs—blue
and buttons are showed back
A laughing young man, sunny with freckl:s.
Will be written that whoso runs may read—
And follow the yellow button with a black button one inch west.
Clinch a ladder, yells a joke to somebody in the crowd.
read
Then to the heart of you, take heed.
And then fixes a yellow button one inch west
(Fen thousand men and boys twist on their bodies in a red soak along a wall)
tire cap.
Give him a wounds, calling for water,
gone rattling death in their throats).
Who but Christ would once what it cost to unvee two buttons one inch on the war map in front of the newspaper office where the freckle-faced young man is laughing at us?—CARL. SANDBURG.
Undergraduate Reactions
A school janitor threw up his job the other day. When asked the trouble, he said, "I'm honest and I won't stand being slurred. If I find a pencil or a handkerchief about the school board, I'll just up. Well, a little while ago I seen wrote on the board, 'Find the least common multiple.' Well, I looked from cellar to garret for that thing, and I wouldn't know the thing if I met it on the street. Last night, in big black jeans, the greatest blackboard, 'Find the classmate,' divisor.' Well, I says to myself, 'both of them things are lost now; and I'll be accused of takin', 'em,' so I quit!'—Daily Nebraskan.
"You know," said the amateur farmer, "we tried half the night recently to set a hen on some eggs and put them into a chicken in question was a rooster."
NOTHING LIKE THIS AT K. U
"Kather illegal use of the mail wasn't it?" commented his friend—Cash. "You're sh*t."
Medic — What makes you think so? M. F, O.—I” overheard Jack say the Thursday night you opened the kitty for five dollars.“Minnesota Minnehaha.
Medic's Fair One—"I didn't know you got paid for your vivisection work, Jim."
I possess a social roommate
Who is rather long and tall,
He acquired gym credit last week
Without any work at all,
All着全 the dumb bells
At the deaf mutes' ball.-Corne
Widow
Al—I'm going to see a swell Jane this evening.
Dell--Couldn't you dig up one for me?
Al—Wouldn't you just as soon have a live one? —Michigan Gargoyle.
She (at the cat hospital)—How much do she charge to treat cats? $10.00
She—Ten dollars what?
He—Purr.—Penn State Froth.
Fresh—When they buried D Sota in the river what did they do with Mimin?
Puzzled Prof- Minnie--?
Voice-haha! - The Ohio Wesleyan.
Peewed One—(after several collisions with inebriated party on the ballroom floor)—Hey, quit running in front of me, quit. I'm a salad? Cowlern Widow.
Ich bin Deutschland von Haus aus but since I am also an American I think there is justice in my protest against treatment accorded the Tatuns at K U. Just because some Germans are getting in bad across the pond does not right the injuries they receive here.
Mixed drinks, like friends, should be few and well chosen.—Pennsylvania Punch Bowl,
American Girl (flustered)—No Wellesley—Dartmouth Jack O'Lanter
Waiter (in German restaurant)—Wasser?
Abertrury meets a teacher
One morning as me and Backing-
skimmer sauntered into the office,
we met on our out of office
grub, we met an easy-looking fellow
with a bright eye and a pipe in his
mouth, coming out. We found Abertrury looking like he'd been caught
a mile from home in a wet shower.
COMMUNICATIONS
OUT O' THE LIBRARY
Editor Daily Kansan,
"I don't either," says Atterbury, wiping off his head: "but I'll bet enough God's Bonds to paper a cell in him." He that's "he a newspaper reporter."
Atterbury Meets a Reporter
"Know that man?" he asked us. We said we didn't.
But if you treated the French auch so, I wouldn't open my Maul about it. However they study in luxury, only they don't but could if they would for they have a nice comparatively clean room which they keep locked.
Hulver Danny Kansan
My dear Freund—
Figuratively she aprechend, they can't lick us so they act like the pigmy who put poison in the broodingnagian's which has not been scrubbed since the thirty years war and is swept only to give the germs due exercise. Consequently it es dresckling. The books are dusty, the man will so nice obsolete. To but add insult to injury they filled the place with second hand chairs from a French restaurant's kitchen. I forgot ventilation but anyhow there isn't any.
"What did he want??" asks Buck, "information," says our president. "Said he was thinking of buying some stock. He asked me about nine hundred questions, and every one of 'em hit some sore place in the clothes." You can't fool me. You see a man about half shabby, with an eye like a gimlet, smoking cut plug, with dandruff on his coat collar, and knowing more than J. P. Morgan and Shakespeare put together—if that isn't a reporter I never saw one"一From O. Henry's "The Gentle Grafter."
I beg you to comment, is this fair? Should not you the Kaiser's and Gotts' own be given a square? In the name of accuracy and Accuracy Bureau I ask you this.
Deine Dichliebende Schonste des Vaterlands.
To the Editor of the Daily Kansas:
Some months ago you printed a story: "The students will get hooks for their wraps in the Administration Building next week." As I still sit on my coat and lay my hat on the floor, I guess the students got the hooks all right, all right
D. I. S. Gusted.
To the Editor of the Daily Kansas:
I am a senior in the College and will be graduated with a major in economics this spring. In justice to the students who are now enrolled, and to the future followers of Adam Smith at K. U., I would like to air a few of my opinions.
By the time a student has put in three, or possibly four, years, in getting what has been advertised as a "Business Man's Education," it appears to me as though he should be familiar at least with the fundamental principles and rules of the business man's game. But on being graduated the student finds his inventory of economic knowledge lacking in the things that will stand the test of application.
DON'T STOP!
And how they will clothes and feed you,
If you stop to find out what your wages will be
Willie, my son, never go to the Sea.
For the sea will never need you.
If you ask for the reason of every command
And argue with people about you,
Willie, my son, don't you go to the Land
For the land will do better without
you
If you stop to consider the work you have done
And to boost what the labor is worth dear,
Angels may come for you Willie, my son
But you'll never be wanted on Earth dear! —Ridyard Klipling
He knows who Adams Smith, Ricardo and a few others were, how much a slave was worth on April Fool's day, 1854, how the steel corporation was formed, how much we lose by poor administration in our tax system; but at the same time he must professional ignorance on such subjects law, the most critical of business law, the most important of a business, shop administration, method of determining costs, and many other practical points.
All these things cannot be incorporated into the department in one year, but a course in business law and finance may be added to the step in that direction. Undoubtedly the need of such a course would be determined by a large enrollment.
Just because the co-eds are called belles is no sign a sorority dance should be called a "bell-hop." -California Pelican.
Vocational.
Tango-"Here's a good story I heard yesterday."
Maxine "Lower" your voice.
Taylor "Dedh us mind." -Dartmouth
Jock O'Lanter
Mrs. Goodwun: "I wish to select a Christmas present for my husband and I can't think of anything. He wishes to think nor go out ughts or play cards."
The salesperson: "Is he fond of fancy work?" Louisiana Giggler.
SNAPPY SPRING SUITINGS
Schulz 913 MASS. ST.
FINE MILLINERY Mrs. Myers STUBB'S BUILDING
BOARD
Box Stationery All Grades-All Prices McColloch's DrugStore
Try our meals; you'll [like them. Give us a trial.
We can save you money on each week's board with our combination meal tickets.
CITY CAFE
906 MASS. ST.
LAWRENCE Business College
LaWrence, Kansas,
Larger and best equipped business college
Kansas,
the Lawrence Bank building. We teach STENO-
nology. We also offer a sample of Stenotype notewa-
ble a catalog
WATKINS'
NATIONAL BANK
Capital $100,000
Surplus and Profits $100,000
The Student Depository.
Allegretti's original chocolate cream, exclusive agency., 65 cents the pound, Carroll's.-Adv.
The Factory Behind the Shoe
The Four Regal Factories Have a Weekly Capacity of 36,000 Pairs
THE millions of people who choose Regals over all other makes have built this organization. The only reason for this volume of sales is Regal supremacy in style, fit and quality. A business is only what the public makes it.
We are proud to be the exclusive Regal agents for Lawrence.
We know that we can give our customers more real shoe values in
Regal Shoes than in any other shoe at Regal prices.
We should like to have you look at the
"RITZ" Rubber Sole Oxford, $4.50
Made of pliable Russet Calf. Narrow, though easy-fitting, toe. Pure Para Rubber Sole and Heel. Suitable for week-end or all-week wear.
PECKHAM'S