THE KANSAN
The official paper of the University of Kansas.
JOSHEN MORGANI OMNIALISY
JOSHEN MORGANI
CUBERY
Editor-in-Chief
EARL FRECHER
Managing Editor
EDITORIAL STAFF:
BUSINESS STAFF:
HOMER BERGER - - Business Manager
CLARK WALLACE - Ass't Bus. Mgr
HENRY F. DEAPER - - Treasurer
J. E. MILLER - - Circulation Mgr
MEMBERS OF BOARD.
LOUIS LACOSS CARL CANNON
WILLIAM E. HAMNER
Entered as second-class mail matter September 30, 1904, at the Lawrence, Kansas, Postoffice under the act of Congress, March 3, 1879.
Published every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday of the school year, by the Kansas University Publishing Association.
Address all business communications to Homer Berger Business Manager, 1406 Tennessee street, Lawrence, Kan; all other communications to Joseph W. Murray, 1120 Louisiana street, Lawrence, Kansas.
Subscription price, $1.50 per year, in advance; one term, 75c; time subscriptions, $1.75 per year.
Office in Basement of Fraser Hall. Phone, Bell. K U 25.
TUESDAY. MARCH 8, 1910.
In the matter of student self government there is little doubt that the women have far outstriped the men at the University of Kansas. The Women's Student Government association has done two things this year which go a long way toward fixing the position of the organization as a useful and important factor in the University life. The first is the establishment of "district meetings," in which the young women of the University are brought together in a social way. The service rendered by these meetings has been to break down harmful barriers of caste and clique and to put the relations of the women of the University or a truly democratic basis. That is work in the direction of Western ideals. The second achievement of the women's association has been the establishment of a scholarship. That is a good thing not only because it will render a service to some deserving student but because it helps to bind the members of the association to gether in the pursuit of a worthy purpose. It is even a better thing than it appears on the surface. The men's association as yet has no such really important achievement to its credit as either of the two cited above. It is true that the laws of the women's association have broken down in some particulars. For instance, the mid-week date rule is almost dead letter; but this minor failure is easily offset by the fact that the first of March is sometime past and the freshmen have not yet blossomed out in their class caps as provided for by solemn enactment of the Men's Student Government association.
There seems to be some uncertainty as to where "Puny" Bluck, the football star, who was lately suspended from the University of Missouri, will bestow his athletic talents next year. Some say he will go to Princeton. "Mark my word," said a Kansas City man to a University of Kansas student the other day, "Bluck will play on the Missouri team next year." If Black tries to, some exciting events may be looked for in Missouri Valley gridiron circles next year.
John Parker and Archie Beard spent Saturday and Sunday in Kansas City at the home of Parker's parents.
STAGES DRAMA OF REAL LIFE
CENTERS AROUND FOOT
BALL PROSPECTS.
Scene Is Laid in Down-Town Dental Office, Where Tragedy Is Put on Daily.
There is one short, usually jovial person at the University who is worried. Not only that, he looks it and admits it. His cares usually seem to be of small concern to him, but at present they are causing him to star in the character of "Chronic Grouch" in a play of that name.
The chief interest in this absorbing tragedy centers around the poor prospects for a championship football team in 1910. The two points in the play which give it its strength are its singleness of character (there being but one person in the cast) and the persistency of its morose tone. This latter gives the audience a leaden feeling in the pit of the stomach which lasts to the end of the third act and later.
The production is staged in the Head Grouch's down-town dental office, whenever a willing audience assembles—which assemblage convenes daily.
The Kansans prints below an epitome of the play, which bids fair to have a long and successful run unless something happens right away.
ACT I.
Enter the daily audience into the waiting room. Audience takes off its hat, "rings" a prong of the hall tree at a distance of sight feet with it, occupies the easiest chair in sight, and the short but sour drama of real life begins.
(From inner office emanate various crunching sounds, indicating removal of an adult size molar from the jaw of some unfortunate. Shuffling of feet toward door of waiting room. Enter entire cats, a pair of villainous-looking forceps in hand Paces floor.)
"Never saw such doin's in my life. Looks to me like everybody at the University is trying his best to give the dear old game of football the blow that killed father. It seems to be a contest between 'em to see who's got the best punch. If somebody doesn't step in pretty soon, they're going to do something really harmful.
(Confidentially) "Do, you know what all this squabble over the game has done to the prospects for next year? Well, I'll tell you. It's ruined them, that's all. It's driven a lot of good football men out of school, who would have stayed otherwise. They all told me, when they left that they didn't enjoy ping-pong nor tiddle-de-winks, so they thought they would attend a school where gentler games were encouraged. What do you suppose the good people of Kansas will say when they learn how their University abolishes the healthier games and demands that its young men risk their lives over the ping-pong table and the tiddle-de-winks board?" (This with inexpressible sarcastm.)
(Lays forceps on the table and sits down beside audience, who looks expectant.)
(Groans from inner office announce recovery of consciousness by him of the extracted molar Cast retires to administer chloroform to above mentioned patient, thus concluding first act.
ACT II.
(Enter villain, commedian and hero, owes in uno.) "There's one more thing about the acts of the Regents which looks muttish to me. They say that football is damaging to scholarship. Now if you will notice closely, you'll find that the class standing of football men is better than the majority of other students. This is shown by the Registrar's records. The football men keep up their work because they have to; they are given some incentive to work, whereas others are not. Now if that isn't a benefit, then I can't recognize one; but the Regents can't see it."
(Gasoline torch explodes in back office, and second act closes with a bang.)
(Enter entire company, frowning.)
ACT III.
"To be plain about it, the 1910 team is going to be punk rotten, the slowest we ever had, and—well, I can't think of anything else adequate to express it just now, but I'll think up a few choice appellations by the time the season opens next fall.
"There isn't a good man coming from this year's freshman team, and the remains of the Varsity will be pickin' for every team they meet next year."
"If I am offered the job of coaching for 1910, I have a notion to turn it down. What they need here is a tiddle-de-winks coach; and do you think I am base enough to lead promising young manhood into the horrible deaths and suffering which await
All signs for Spring point to the greatest "gray craze" in the history of Men's Clothes. It is really astonishing to behold the endless number of entirely new effects that have been worked up in this popular color. You'll find it well worth your while to see our display of these new grays, especially the excellent Suit values we're featuring at
Gray Holds Sway!
$15, $20 and $25
Pound Stationery
35c to 60c
ROWLANDS' College Book Store
the dare-devil participants of that bloody game? No! Daily tooth-pulling and infliction of torture in other forms may have slightly dulled my fine sensibilities, but I won' coach tiddle-dewinks."
(Company glares a moment at audience, who grins exasperatingly; then retires to call a cab for the patient.)
Curtain.
UNIVERSITY NOTICES.
The Masque club will hold an important business meeting next Thursday evening at 7:15 in Fraser hall.
The Student Council will meet tomorrow evening at 7 o'clock in Freser hall.
Dr. Washington Gladden's subject for his lecture tomorrow afternoon at 4:30 will be "Where Are We, in Democracy" The subject of his Thursday afternoon lecture will be, "Where Are We, in Social Morality?"
H. B. McFarland of the Santa Fe railroad will lecture on "Boiler Tests" to the Mechanical Engineering society Thursday evening, at 1301 Ohio street.
Ira Hedrick will lecture to the Civil Engineering society in Blake hal, Thursday evening.
All girls of the University are cordially invited to the second Y. W. C. A. matinee, which will be held on Saturday afternoon at 3 o'clock at the Chi Omega house, 1541 Kentucky.
Tickets for the Y. W. C. A. banquet Saturday evening, March 12, in Snow hall, can be procured either at the Rest room every day between 10 and 11 o'clock, or from the membership committee, of which Fern Cramer is the chair man.
GIRLS DANCE WITH GIRLS.
'Co.Eds Lead as Well as Men,' the Verdict.
The girls of Hannah Mitchell's district of the Women's Student Council gave a party in Robinson gymnasium Saturday night. Each girl of the district brought a girl from some other district as her guest for the evening, which was spent in dancing.
Programs were given out and the "leading ladies" were much interested in filling them.
Some of the girls say that Coeds lead as well as men and it is more fun to dance with them.
Mesdames Templin and MeFarland and Miss Corbin were the patronesses and guests of the district.
Shorthand & Typewriting Practical accounting. Enter at any time.
LAWRENCE Business College Lawrence, Kansas.
LAWRENCE
Protsch Spring Suiting
The Watkins National Bank.
Capital $100,000
Surplus $50,000
Undivided profits $20,000
J. B. Watkins, Pres. C. A. Hill, V. P.
C. H. Tucker, cashier.
W. E. Hazen, assistant cashier.
Commencement Invitations
and Programs
A. G. ALRICH.
Printed or Engraved. Thesis bind-
Bell Phone 288. 744 Mass. St.
GENERAL PRACTICE.
G.W.JONES, A.M., M.D.
Special attention to diseases of the stomach, surgery, and gynecology. Suite No. I, F. A. A. Bldg. Residence Lawrence Hospital and Training School. 1201 Ohio St. Both Phones No. 35.
DR. H. W. HAYNE
OCULIST
EYE WORK ONLY
713 Mass, St.
First-class Work. Prompt Delivery
LawrenceSteam Laundry
MOON & JOSTE, K. U
Agents
SPECIAL WORK
Bell Phone 1962-455
Home Phone 3992
Wilder Brothers Custom Laundry
Carpenter & Arnold, Agents Bell 1546, Home 895, Laundry Phone 67
Special attention given to Ladies' work
PIPER BROS. PANATORIUM 9 presses for a dollar. Home Ph. 140 730 MASS. LAWRENCE, KAN.
937 Mass. Jackson Bl'k
Phone 936 Bell Hours 9 to 5
H. E. ROBERTS DENTIST
Take 'em down to
Those Shoes you want repaired
MARTIN'S STEAM LAUNDRY
The Students, Gorsuch and Mayer,
agents. Either Phone 498
HEADOUARTERS 1108 KY. ST.
SMITH HALL
635 MASS. ST.
G. W. Smith.
Thoroughly Remodeled; Excellent Spring Floor; accommodates 75 couples easily. Call Bell Phone 1705.
GO TO
Ed. Anderson's RESTAURANT FOR YOUR Oysters, Cigars and Candies.
Aldeich Butterfield
Foreign Tours sails from New York June 2-11-21. $325 to $800.
Experienced conductors and best steamships. Address.
1407 Buchanan St., Topeka, Ks.
and the Ara-Notch
ARROW COLLAR
15c, 2 for 25c. Chatt, Peabody & Co., Makern
ARROW CUTS 25 cents a pair
We do particular cleaning and pressing for particular people The Lawrence Pantatorium. 12 West Warren street. Phones 506.