University Daily Kansan / Tuesday, November 6. 1990
5
President should try 'garbage'
President Bush is peeed at Democrats in Congress for misleading U.S. citizens about taxes and saying he is a pal of the rich
He says, "they've been getting away with this tax-the rich class warfare kind of garbage that they always resurrect at election."
Well, of course they have. But as a politician, President Bush should recognize it might be just garbage, but it might also be garbage. And it almost never fails.
Even now, with the new budget nicely bleated, Rep. Dawn Rostenkowski is still aiming his beady eyes at the television cameras and vowing to stay on the heels of the well-heeled. It's about "fairness," he says with a straight face. Then he goes off to tee it up with his rich buddies, who forgive him because they know it's all part of his political con.
What else would President Bush have Democrats like Robenkosenk do — tell voters the truth? That would be exciting, but so is watching someone threatening to jump from a 10th-floor window ledge.
How would it sound if Rostenkowski went on a television show with this routine?
"Congressperson, as head of Congress' top money-grabbing committee, how much are you going to soak the rich this time?"
"We're not. The rich already are being thoroughly soaked."
"That's right. Don't you media types ever read the tax revenue statistics?"
"No, we only read our TelePromp Ters."
"Then you should. It says right here that less than 1 percent of all tax returns come from people in the $200,000-plus bracket. But that tiny minority is kicking in more than 15 percent of all revenue. Seems more than enough to me. Especially when you consider how little the lower brackets pay."
Mike Royko Syndicated columnist
"How little? Everyone knows that the poor hand-to-mouth taxpayer gets gauged worse than anyone."
"Hah, that's the line we always fed you, but I didn't think you were really dumb enough to believe it."
"You mean the hard-up aren't being clipped?"
"Of course not. Look at the stats. About 60 percent of all tax returns are from people earning between zich and $30,000. That's a lot of people. But they are paying only 21 percent of all taxes. And those under $10,000, about 30 percent of all the returns, are paying just about nothing. So if less than 1 percent of all taxes are paying almost as much in taxes as almost 70 percent of the taxpayers, that seems fair to me."
"Yes, but the rich must be getting away with something sneaky. What about all their tax shelterers, those sly loopholes we heard so much about?"
"Ancient history. We killed most of the tax shelters back when we changed the brackets. And we're now getting rid of the few that remain. No, ladies and gents of the media, we're squeezing the rich pretty hard. In fact, if we take much more, it will be less rich. The rich are really a tiny minority. And we democrat believe in being kind to minorities."
"But don't you realize that most U.S. citizens want you to soak the rich more and more?" They would be thrilled if you stripped them of every nickel they have and sent them on out street corners with tins to buses.
"That's what they did in Russia and China and Cuba and Albania. What are you, a bunch of commies?"
"No, but how do you think most voters will react to what you're saying?"
"A good question. The answer is that as a result of my saying these true but shocking things, my political career is now over. Which is why I take back everything I just said and will贴 temporary insanity."
And he would be doomed and would face a life of poverty. Well, not exactly, since Rostenkowski still could legally shift his $1 million political war chest to personal use. And he'd have a lifetime $70,000 payment from him to $33,000 if he waits until 93 to return. Congress doesn't suik itself.)
If Bush were smart, he wouldn't carp about how Rostenkowski is misleading (polite word for lying to the voters. He'd get out there and engage in boob-rousing, class warfare himself.
Don't Republicans know how to do simple math? If less than 1 percent of taxpayers are in the top bracket, they don't represent enough votes to elect a town constable. Ah, but these $30,000 and under, they almost 70 percent. You can get a landscape out of them.
So Bush should wise up. Months ago, he could have gone on television and said: "I am horrified to find that a man making $500,000 a year pays only $150,000 of that in taxes. So I'm going to propose to Congress that they take everything away from the money grabbing swine except a few dollars to feed his pampered family. That would save her home, our country club membership and dress him in rags. And I going to give it all to those of you who, because of this insensitive, insulting society, are not rich."
Try it, Mr. President, and watch those approval ratings so in the polls. And don't worry, your golf will not understand. Rostenkorn's 8.06
Mike Royko is a syndicated columnist with the Chicago Tribune.
Other Voices
Backward revelation
C. B. Scott Jones, an aide to Sen Claiborne Pell of Rhode Island, recently wrote Defense Secretary Richard Cheney with a startling revelation: When tapes of speeches Secretary of State James Baker and Bush are played backward, the word "simone" can be heard.
Jones alerted Secretary Cheney to his discovery because he feared that "smine" might be a "code language" used in the national interest to be known."
Let's hear more about this new technology.
If, for example, we played Bush's famous "No new taxes" campaign speech backward, might we not hear the spectral words,
"I'm lying, I'm lying?" And those pious speeches by congressmen calling for fiscal restraint — wouldn't the reverse speech techni-que reveal a voice whimpering, "Let me keep my pay raise."
No wonder we've had such trouble reading their lips!
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