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Thursday Features
University Daily Kansan
Thursday, Sept. 26, 1985
Single parents balance family, school, social life
By Susie Bishop Of the Kansan staff
Of the Kansan staff
School pressures - balancing
students' stress and anxiety
school pressures — balancing studies, social life and private time can be overwhelming for any student. It can be particularly difficult for a special group of students: single parents.
The problems of being a student and a parent can never be the same among two people. Patti Hackney, Lawrence third-year law student, and Charlene May, Lawrence doctoral candidate, are two students who have faced the problems of being a single parent.
Patti Hackney, law student, shares a laugh with her daughter, Sunni, 11, at their home at 2210 Pennsylvania St. Hackney has been divorced for eight years, except for a brief second marriage, and has assumed the role of both mother and student during that time.
"There's a lot of guilt involved," Hackney said recently. "Am I being selfish? I want to further my career, but at some level I know that I'm hurting my child."
With the exception of a brief second marriage, Hackney has been a single mother and a student for nine years, since her daughter, Sunni, was 2
"It's much easier now that my daughter is older," Hackney said. "You need backup, someone to pick her up from the baby sitter or to stay with her when she's sick. It's really not a bad idea if other parent to share responsibilities."
She said the rewards that came with being a single parent helped her survive the hard times and strengthened the bond between her daughter and herself.
"My daughter and I are very close," Hackney said. "We are careful about scheduling time together.
"In law school everything is very intense. I'm forced to temper that with reality. I can't sit at the law school and study all night. I have to go home and make dinner."
Hackney said her experience as a single parent and student has made her more sympathetic to other people.
"I'm less quick to judge a person because of what they have or have not accomplished," she said. "It's very difficult to judge from a distance that pressures someone may be under."
The time when the pressures were the greatest was when her child was small. Hackney said.
"I didn't have a car, so I had to walk my daughter to and from
'I want to further my career, but at some level I know that I'm hurting my child.'
student
—Patti Hackney Lawrence third-year law student
pre-school," she said. "It's hard to concentrate when you have a child who is crying, a child who wants to eat, a child who wants and needs attention.
"Now that she's older, she's a great help to me. She's learned the filing system at the law library and will pull volumes for me."
Hackney's desire to further her education stemmed from her need to
"I wanted my daughter to see what women can do," Backney said.
"I'd hate to use the word success, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel," she said. "It is a success in the way that I have a degree and that
I have a good relationship with my daughter."
Hackney said when she saw people with small children, she realized that, because she made the choice to be a student and a mother, she missed sharing important moments in her daughter's childhood.
May said being single, a mother and a student was a different experience for women and their children in the late 1960s.
In 1968, after completing her undergraduate studies at Eastern Michigan University, Ypsilanti, Mich., May came to the University of Kansas as a graduate student and a single mother of an 8-year-old boy and a 7-year-old girl.
"I never thought of myself as a gady woman, or as incredible." May said. "I looked at it as a necessity.
"I was divorced. My job didn't pay enough. I needed to go back to school to support the children."
Any guilt feelings about leaving her children alone during the day while she attended the University, May said, were tempered with the realization that she needed more education to support her family. If she couldn't spend more time with her children, at least she could be the breadwinner, May said.
"There were times when I was very, very selfish. And then there were the days when it was just the three of us." May said. "I'd take a year or two off to get the money or to get my head together. There were lots of times when I felt like quitting. I lived moment by moment."
May said money was hard to come by. She provided for her family by working as a teaching assistant or at one or more part-time jobs.
poor, but I don't," May said. "I was accepted where I was, but they weren't. They felt like second-class citizens. It was really hard for kids who didn't have a father at home.
"My kids remember that we were
"The kids' big night out during the week was a trip to McDonald's. Their best meal during the day was the hot school lunch."
Today there are organizations designed to help the single parent
KU Parents Group, organized by Sara Martin, assistant director of the Student Assistance Center, offers a baby-sitting network and an informational newsletter to all student parents, single or married. Martin said that the criteria for becoming a member of the group are simple — a
person must be a student and a parent.
The Bert Nash Community Mental Health Center, 336 Missouri St., offers programs to help families deal with the pressures of being alone.
Proposed album warning labels receive mixed reviews
By Susie Bishop Of the Kansan staff
It may only be rock 'n' roll, but some people don't like it. Enough, in fact, to keep their children and others from listening to it.
A group of Congressmen's wives is trying to get legislation passed to place warning labels on records containing lyrics with specific references to sex, violence, drugs or occultism.
However, no legislation has been introduced since a Senate Commerce Committee hearing Sept. 19.
Some KU students, however, disagree with these groups and the movement they support.
The movement to place the warning labels on records also has been endorsed by the National Parent Teachers Association, who feel children need to be shielded from some of today's music.
"I don't think it is turning his brain into kep, He doesn't take it seriously." Scott Stites, Dexter, Mo. sophomore, said about his 13-year-old brother who is going through the heavy metal stage.
"Maybe something as discreet as a rating would be OK, but it needs to be a voluntary thing."
"I am opposed to any legislation that would put an age requirement on purchasing records," Sites said.
Stites said he thought that it was the music that drew the listening audience and not the lyrics.
He added that if there were such a law, he would consider purchasing an album for someone under age.
Pucka Osoba, Prairie Village
junior, agreed in part with Stites' views.
"I don't think that records should have warning labels because it is a private industry," Osoba said. "You choose what you want to buy. It doesn't hurt the private citizen at all."
Osoba said that broadcasting of sexually explicit and vulgar material should be a concern to a citizen, but that radio stations already changed words that they felt were extremely offensive or chose not to air the song.
"It a song that I was embassarded about came on the radio, I would turn it down if my mom was around. Even now if my mom is in the car with me and a rude song comes on the air, I will change the station," she said.
Other students said they felt some songs were offensive and agreed that record labeling was needed.
Tina Erland, Lawrence sophomore, said she would favor governmental legislation that would help control the lyrical content of music.
"I think warning labels should be put on," Erland said. "It's sickening what kids can be exposed to through music."
Lee Shaver, Prairie Village freshman, said though he disagreed with any sort of censorship, a warning on the album wouldn't bother him. He said he thought such a label would have no effect.
Shaver said that today's lyrics didn't seem to have much of an effect on his 13-year-old brother.
"I'm sure he is learning words and things, but that is part of growing up." Shaver said.
Fowler Jones, Fairway junior and disc jockey at KJIK, said, "Music is art, and that should be free expression. It's outrageous. What good will labels do, except get parents all riled up."
cations Commission guidelines would not allow radio stations to play recordings that had obscene words in them before midnight.
Steve Wilson, manager of Kief's Discount Records and Stereo Supply, 2100 W. 25th St., said he had a variety on the topic of censoring and labeling.
He said he thought that most people were prevented to something that would be forbidden.
Jones said that Federal Communi-
"The most compelling word in the English language is the word 'no'," *Walter*
Wilson said he thought labeling records was a backdoor approach to censorship.
"Personally and legally, I stand behind the First Amendment," Wilson said. "The less we mess with it, the better.
"There are a lot of rock lyrics that are offensive to me. I don't have to listen to them or buy them."
Body builders pump up for weekend competition
By Theresa Scott Of the Kansan staff
Burly, bodies are bursting with brawn after months of preparation for Saturday's Kansas Body Building Championships in Wichita.
about 20 Lawrence body builders who will comete in Wichita.
To prepare for this meet, Servello said, he has worked out twice a day for the last three weeks — an hour before going to class and an hour after class — to tone and balance his physique.
Servello said Tuesday that he began pumping iron for competition two years ago. He competes in the lightweight division and has entered only two competitions before this season, where he won Lawrence competition last spring and placed fifth in a national meet in Hutchinson this summer.
In an attempt to lose weight, he has eaten yogurt and Fruit for lunch and a can of tuna for dinner during the past six weeks. So far he has lost nine pounds but he said he wanted to lose
Vince Servello, Tonganoxie junior,
and Byron Howard, a graduate of the
University of Kansas, are two of
five more to weigh 164 pounds at the competition.
Howard, 27, who also is following a strict diet before the competition, said he ate a lot of carbohydrates before a meet. He said his diet had been successful because he had lost 26 pounds since February. The
"I have no body fat, or very little," Servello said, "so it's hard for me to lose weight."
6-foot-3-inch hulk now weighs 230 pounds. Howard competes in the heavyweight division.
"The disciplined workout and diet take a lot of power," Howard said. "A lot of people can't handle it."
The tournament this weekend will be Howard's first and will be the realization of one of his goals in life, he said.
Students put grocery shopping in the bag
Photo Illustration by Steve Minola/KANSAM
And although grocery shopping is pretty much the same everywhere, students have their own methods of getting the food from those shelves to the pantry.
By Bonnie Snyder Of the Kansan staff
The sacks of vegetables, cookies and frozen pizzas that Mom and Dad bought when classes started more than a month ago looked as if they'd last forever.
According to some KU students. Saturday can be the best and the worst day to go grocery shopping.
Not so. Now all those groceries have somehow disappeared, and it's time once again to visit an oasis of the 28 grocery stores in Lawrence.
Some students avoid the controversy by shopping during the week. Tummy Dowers, Hutchinson freshmen, said they ripe for shopping on Wednesdays.
Doris Saltkill, Wichita junior,
disagreed. She said that Saturday
was by far the worst day to go to the
stores because they were so crowded.
Jean Madsen, Lawrence graduate student, said last week that Saturday morning was absolutely the best time to hit the grocery store.
Marvin Hauschild, manager of Rusty's at 23rd and Louisiana streets, said he thought that Thursday was the best day to shop because stores were ready for weekend shoppers and sales had begun.
"No one is there and the doughnuts are fresh," she said.
"People don't get paid until Friday, so it's not crowded and it's stocked well," Dawers said.
And while no consensus was reached as to what day was best to restock the refrigerator, neither was there agreement about the number of companions to take.
Derek Myers, Overland Park sophomore, said that his roommates came in handy while shopping. He said that they often helped him resist the temptation to buy unnecessary items — but not always.
Some students said they shopping alone, and others said they took their roommates.
Bill Helling, Kansas City, Mo,
graduate student, said his 3 %-yearold
son helped him with the shopping.
we talk each other into buying things we don't even want." Myers said.
"He looks for the bargains," Heiling said.
Kathy Boyle, Fairway senior, said she goes to Food Barn, 1900 W. 23rd St.
"It's cheaper and I know where everything is," she said.
Earl Hutchens, manager of Food Earn, said he stocked up on pop, beer and chips during the school year.
"Quick-to-fix stuff seems to be real popular with the kids," said Hutchens, whose store carries everything from apples to zucchini.
Hutchens said that many customers preferred to bag their own groceries.
"That way when they get it home they know how they should put it
However, Lisa Anderson, Dunlap, Iowa, freshman, said she didn't like to bag her own groceries.
"I'm afraid I'm going to break
something," she said.
Anthony Mulvey, Harrisonville, Mo., sophomore, agreed with Anderson.
"I always smash everything," he said.
Tom Kunkel, Dharan, Saudi Arabia sophomore, said he didn't mind bazzing his purchases.
"It just takes common sense," he said. "You don't put the potatoes on top of the eggs."
Although some students said that they didn't have any particular brands that they always bought, others said that they couldn't live without their favorites.
Liz Doty, Chicago sophomore, said,
I just read labels and buy the ones
that I need.
Kristin Carper, Newton senior, said, "I'm really loyal to brands, usually the most expensive My boyfriend's philosophy is that if it's more expensive, it has to taste better."
Dowers said she had to have Keebler cookies and Jif peanut butter.
Saltkill simply said, "Diet Pepsi is god."
Dowera said, "I see people from my dorm that I usually don't talk to."
However, Myers said that he wasn't interested in meeting people with disabilities.
"Junk food is more of a distraction than a girl," he said.
Some students said local supermarkets also could be a place for
Wilson said he thought today's music was bereft of poetic language and if there had to be restriction, it might force the artist to use creative lyrics to communicate to his audience.
But Wilson said he also had to look at the issue as a businessman.
"Libraries and bookseellers aren't real crazy about having what they offer censored and neither am I," Wilson said.
Wilson said he wouldn't stock an album he considered to be extremely offensive, but if it was mildly offensive he would carry it but not display it prominently.
The labeling would also have an economic effect. Record companies would have to hire someone to listen to all the music and place a warning label on the record, which would cause the price of albums and tapes to rise, he said.
On Tap
Nancy Haney
Peggy Helsel
CONCERTS:
Common Ground will perform reggae music at 8:30 p.m. today at the Jazhauz, 92%1² Massachusetts St. Private Parts, featuring Dwayne Bailey, lead guitarist for Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band. There is a 9:30 a.m. row and Saturday. There is a $3 cover charge.
Ropeburn, a local variety band, will play at 9 p.m. today at Johnny's Tavern, 401 N. Second St.
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Brett Hodges will play at 10 p.m.
tomorrow and Saturday at Up and
Under. 403 N. Second St.
图
Metropolitan Opera soprano Benita Valente will perform with the Guarneri String Quartet at 8 p.m. Oct. 3 in Crafton-Preyer Theatre in Murphy Hall. The performance will open the 1985-86 Chamber Music Series. Tickets are $5.50 and $4.50 for KU students, $11 and $9 for the public, and $10 and $8 for senior citizens and other students. All tickets are reserved and can be bought at the Murphy Hall box office.
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Valentine & The Wealthy will perform for the second concert of the Burge Bandstand Series at 9 p.m. Oct. 4 in the Party Room of the Burge Union. The concert is free and is sponsored by SUA.
PLAYS:
The play, "Twelve Angry Men," will open the 1985-86 University of Kansas William Inge Memorial Theatre Series at 8 p.m. Oct. 2 to Oct 6 at the Inge Theatre in Murphy Hall. Tickets are $1.50 for UB students, $3 for the public, and $2 for senior citizens and other students. All tickets are general admission and may be purchased at the Murphy Hall box office.