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What flavor of smoothie would Kanye West be?
Okay, okay, let me preface this admitted deep dive into lunacy by laying down some knowledge.
You have successfully left your fans - and many Spotify playlists - dying for just a little bit of Yeezus.
It's been a while since we've heard you, Mr. West.
OMAR SANCHEZ
@OhMySanchez
"If Kanye West were a smoothie..."
"G.O.O.D Fridays," as West likes to refer them, is a recent revival of his weekly drops that in 2010 led up to his album "My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy."
It has become a thirst, Mr.West, and that left me with one conclusion. It's probably born of delusion in the current Sahara of a hip-hip industry, but it is an epiphany that struck my mind harder than the jarring intro to "Black Skinhead."
With his soon-to-be released album "Swish," West has brought them back into the fray but this time with a little more panache and a pinch less coherency.
And that pinch, actually, gets right to the core of my quandary.
West, throughout his diverse catalogue of music, has given us an assortment of emotionally-charged "ingredients," and with that, he has allowed his listeners to aggregate a specific palate that in itself warrants its own flavor at The Roasterie.
Still, he is a maestro, so picking him apart to tear him down is not my intention; I don't want to be dropped senseless like Kris Humphries with his little cameo in "Cold," a.k.a. "Theraflu."
But what exactly is in a "Kanye West?" Would it even be good? Would a mere drop to the tongue of this concoction necessitate rehabilitation? If you were to go up tomorrow and order a large "Ye' with warm milk and a booster," what wild, unimaginable components to the juice would be even possible?
Instead, just like how Mr.West shuts himself in a room and cranks out his blissful, primal bellowing... .. I'm going to shut myself in this room and crank out some sweet, rich nectar from the flowers of "The College Dropout" to
"Yeezus" is as out there as you can possibly get in hip-hop. Whether he is truly God's vessel or the next Picasso is still up for debate.
his recent seedlings with his "G.O.O.D Fridays" platform — all in order to dissect just how much of a pumpkin spice latte potential a "Kanye West" really has.
FACTS - Released Jan. 1 Much like the last time we last heard West with his album "Yeezus," "Facts"
— the first track released under the 2016 "G.O.O.D Fridays" umbrella — enjoys a soothing, choir-like loop sprinkled throughout West's bars, something "Bound 2" did with West's 2013 release. However, unlike "Bound 2," which used its airtime to proclaim that West's transition into adult courtship is more than just a fantasy, "Facts" uses a seething vitriol to indict Nike and the Jordan brand for presumably looking over his established name-value.
It has a bravado that, at least for the moment, gives me a gaudy aftertaste similar to his 2006 album release "Late Registration," which in itself broke away from the usual inner-reflection in West's earlier music. However, hints of a thematic underpinned makes it somewhat satisfying as an opening statement to his fans, as the chorus would explain how disgusted he is with all the cheating and stealing going on in his life, something that he will touch on in greater detail later.
This is a track that has all of Havoc, BOI-1da, and Frank Dukes to thank, and it is the sort of exploration into Kanye West's fame that we haven't seen yet — and it's kind of scary.
As such, it is easy to assume that powdered ginger is a crucial element to constructing the perfect "Kanye West." Not only will the juice wake you up with a little spicy kick, but it also manages to make you feel like you were just hit with one of those patented Kanye death glares.
ILLUSTRATION BY JAKE KAUFMANN/KANSAN
Unapologetically, it includes thick, chewy rhymes about a cousin that stole his laptop, a digestible beat that comes and goes with ease, and it has hip-hop artist Ty Dolla Sign answering seemingly-rhetorical questions from Kanye during the hook.
If "FACTS" is the ginger to the essential "Kanye West," then the second track from "G.O.O.D Fridays," "Real Friends," can rightfully be the bacon bits.
Just imagine the first
"Real Friends," for all of those vegetarian listeners out there, might be one you stay away from.
time you watched one of those documentaries that explained what disgusting and putrid conditions major food companies make their meat in.
"Real Friends" plays out just like that. It exposes you to things you've never wanted to see, made you want to cry a few times and maybe even kept you vegan for a couple days.
But, just like Kanye West gifts, meat is just too good. The latest installment of "G.O.O.D Fridays," as was teased at the end of "Real Friends" the week before, is his duo track with Kendrick Lamar, "No More Parties in L.A."
And man, this immediately-enshrined banger in my Spotify playlist is some of the rarest cookie dough I have ever seen.
Starting with a sample of Johnny "Guitar" Watson's 1977 ballad "Give Me My Love," this hyper-stimulating journey through the seemingly-lavish life a Hollywood persona is excellently splattered across the wall with honest retellings of drawbacks and inherent fiascos that comes with the business — an anguish that finally forces West to plead for no more parties in L.A. towards the last hook.
The song in a way invites you to bake something delicious with it, to glean some of its lyrics and to make what your heart desires.
And there you have it: three secret ingredients that go into making a quenching "Kanye West" smoothie.
However, don't let the absurdity of these components fool you. Just like West's music, if you take time to strip away the slight bit of insanity, there is a sweet center that satisfies even the most particular of senses.
- Edited by Kate Miller
Also, there is still a lot more to uncover — more "G.O.O.D Fridays" coming up to try to decipher.
So, I'm leaving those duties up to you. I don't know exactly what's next in store for "Swish" or Kanye in general, but there's a good possibility this verse from "No Parties in LA" will get you going:
"MAKE ME GET
SPIRITUAL / MAKE ME
BELIEVE IN MIRACLES /
BUDDHIST MONKS AND
CAP'N CRUNCH CEREAL."
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