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Friday, November 20, 1987 / University Daily Kansan
Opinion
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
Misdirected opportunity
The term "opportunity" has long been an ambiguous one in this country. Just what it means and who is entitled to it are questions that have fueled some of our nation's fiercest internal battles, from the Civil War to the Civil Rights Act of 1964.
Now, the term is being borrowed by some who want to cloak less-than-fair policies in the appearance of legitimacy. In Wisconsin, an experimental new program has been inaugurated that will cut the welfare subsidy of families as a penalty for dependent children dropping out of school.
"It gives them an opportunity they wouldn't have by dropping out of school," says Gov. Tommy Thompson, the creator of the "learnfare" program. "It's a win for the state, it's a win for the families. It's a win for the kids."
Thompson seems to be overly optimistic about the probable effects of his plan. The bottom line is that families will be penalized for the behavior of unruly teen-agers, perhaps depriving parents of their only opportunity to provide adequately for dependent children. A likely scenario is that kids who drop out of school will also be forced out of the family unit by economic pressures.
Moreover, once out of the household, the chances of a teen-ager returning to school are smaller yet, since he or she must work to eat. But, as Thompson himself points out, employment prospects for dropouts are very poor indeed. The end result therefore may be that only the nature of society's burden, and not the existence of the burden, will change.
Enhancing opportunities for education is a commendable objective. But surely there is a better way to keep kids in school than this. After all, even dropouts need family support; even the illiterate need to eat.
Raised evebrows
A pay raise is hard to refuse.
That is why Congress has an obligation to change its methods of giving pay raises to members.
One method of increasing their pay now is through a commission that periodically recommends salary increases for certain government employees, including members of the House and Senate. Unless Congress rejects the increases within 30 days, they automatically go into effect.
So Congress received a 15.6 percent pay increase in February because it did not refuse it a $12,100 increase in annual salary.
As if that weren't enough, the House voted recently to increase the salaries of Congress 3 percent more, which would be a $2,700 raise in yearly salary
The measure was part of a deficit-reduction bill, of all things. So if he Senate approves the proposal, Congress will have received a $14.800 nav raise.
Some members of Congress from Kansas complained that they didn't realize that this measure was attached.
But it's their job to know what they are voting for
The only method that Congress should be able to grant itself pay raises, especially now in trying to cut the deficit, is to bring a specific proposal to the floor and to vote yes or no.
And members will always have responsibility for their votes.
Editorials in this column are the opinions of the editorial board.
News staff
Jennifer Benjamin ... Editor
Juli Warren ... Managing editor
John Benner ... News editor
Beth Copeland ... Editorial editor
Sally Streff ... Campus editor
Brian Kablerline ... Sports editor
Dian Ruettlimann ... Photo editor
Bill Skeet ... Graphics editor
Tom Ebien ... General manager, news adviser
Business staff
Bonnie J. Hardy...Business manager
Robert Hughes...Advertising manager
Kelly Scherer...Retail sales manager
Kurt Messersmith...Campus sales manager
Greg Knipp...Production manager
David Dordrecht...National sales
Angela Clark...Classified manager
Ron Weems...Director of marketing
Jeanne Hines...Sales and marketing adviser
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MIXNEELY Thiagolirubine
Lonely hearts ride on love boat
The other day while flipping through TV channels, I came across a program titled "Love Connection." My first impulse was to keep on searching, but just then I heard the announcer say:
"Wow!" You won't believe the sex we have got for you! Today our single and sexy female contestant from Akron, Ohio, Earline Podstein, 27, will tell us all about her pre-arranged date with Frank Helman, 29, a mortician from Phoenix. Ariz.
My curiosity got the best of me. The studio audience roared its approval as I grabbed a bag of potato chips and raced to the couch.
The drama unfolded like a soap opera as Earline described in great detail the enchantment of the big date. Frank had taken her to a Chinese drive-thru restaurant and then to his favorite movie "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid."
Later in the evening, they toured the local laudromat. It was there, by the light of a 60-watt灯 bulb, that the two realized an overwhelming love for one another and kissed passionately while a chorus of washing machines began spin cycles.
Host Chuck Woolery was at a loss for words. So was I. The studio audience "ooohed" and "aahed" as a large digital screen displayed the scores, which indicated that Earlline and Frank were indeed a perfect match.
This meant the happy twosome were granted another all-expense-paid date if they so wished. They did. Then Chuck predicted marriage and a large family for them and announced that time had run out for the day. I was amazed. How could this all happen so fast and easy? But before I had a chance to catch my breath, the Naming Dating Game" flashed upon my screen.
Another host immediately began to run down the list of eligible bachelors, and I readied myself in a new position on the couch.
Bachelor No. 1 was named Sean. He enjoyed jogging, reading poetry and listening to the masters of classical music. Sean was looking for that special woman with whom he could share his morning breath. His best line for picking up girls was, "Hey, babe, is that your real hair?"
Bachelor No. 2 was George, "The Terminator." He sang and played oboe in a rock group called "The Noxious Tunes." Some of George's other hobbies included destroying small appliances and revolting noises with his armpit. He said he needed a woman who wouldn't mind playing the harmonica in his band. Later on in the show, George disgusted the studio audience by belching his hello to the bachelorette.
hobbies included shopping, playing cards, watching roller derby matches, shopping, water aerobics and shopping.
By the way, the bachelorette's name was Sandy. Sandy was a 25-year-old born-again shopper and part-time beauty consultant. Her
After Sandy's short question-and answer session with the eager men, I bet my roommate a pizza that she would pick bachelor No. 3. Just then, Sandy chose Thorton. I spat out a mouthful of chips and scoffed, "What kind of a fool are you? Just wait until you see him and then tell me I didn't warn you!"
Bachelor No. 3 was probably best described by bachelor No. 2 as being a cross between Mr. Rogers and Mr. Potato Head. His name was Thornton. Thornton didn't have any hobbies and wasn't sure why he was there. When asked to say hello to the bachelorette, he forgot the question.
But when Sandy's and Thoront's eyes met I knew I had misjudged the pair. I could actually see the electricity between them. Later I found out that Thornton had accidentally dragged his feet across the carpet on the stage. Their exciting dream date was a trip to the fabulous town of . . . Las Vegas, Nev.
"Whooopie!" exclaimed Sandy as she gave Thoron a pignon-back ride off the stage. The runners-up received a one-year supply of Jiffy popcorn and active length Lee press-on nailers.
In the meantime, I sat dumbbounded in my mess of chips. I wondered whether there was any way that I could get out of my bet I wondered whether love could be cultivated on shows such as the ones I had just seen. I wondered whether this would change mankind as we know it and put Ann Landers and Dr. Ruth out of business.
Lyle Hoopingarner is a Manter sophomore majoring in journalism.
I stopped wondering and glanced at the television screen. There I once again saw Sandy and Thornton, but this time they were with Jane and Frank on the set of "Divore Court."
Clean house
K·A·N·S·A·N
MAILBOX
It seems to me from the story on housing by David Silverman, that the house I live in is a disingustingly unlightly dump; however, 1319 Tennessee contains some very nice apartments.
mine included. I have high ceilings, my plumbing and electricity work, and I have never seen a pigeon even near the roof. I also have a leaded cabinet, a huge kitchen, and a nice-sized bathroom.
The fact that Brandon Whitehead lives in the attic is no reason to stereotype the entire dwelling. No one forced him to rent or live up there; he chose to do so. I am appalled that the picture in the paper was taken of a room he uses for storage. I don't live in my closet and would not want it perceived that I do. Maybe Whitehead was misrepresented, as I was.
I like where I live and I resent it being
depicted as a slum for bats. I suggest that an article be run showing some of the nice apartments in the old houses of the Oread neighborhood. I know some of the tenants in this house have helped paint and repair it. We like it here and have worked hard to make the outside look as nice as we've worked to make our apartments look on the inside.
Kristen Noves, house manager of 1319 Tennessee,
St., and Kansas City, Mo., junior
BLOOM COUNTY
by Berke Breathed