Volume 124 Issue 37
kansan.com
Thursday, October 13, 2011
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CONTACT
KANSAS IN HEAT // EXTERIOR EXPLORATION
> Tackling the sticky world of relationships.
KJHK caller asks:
My girlfriend likes it when I tickle or gently stroke her back side, but she's not sure about anal sex. Do I continue with the tickling or would it be OK try something more? I really don't want to get a slap upside my head, but would like to explore all sexual possibilities with her. Any advice would be helpful. Thanks!
Michelle answers:
The introduction of a "taboo" sex act like anal sex can be tricky. But anal play can be very pleasurable for both parties involved. Remember, men can enjoy anal play just as much as women - but we'll save that for another column!
I always say, "Try it! If you don't like it, then you don't have to do it again!" Every partner is different. The same sex play you did not enjoy before may be
extremely satisfying with a new partner! If your girlfriend is interested in trying something more than tickling or stroking, try these tips:
2) Create a calm and relaxed environment. Use various extended foreplay techniques: bathing together, erotic massage, oral sex, or stroking, caressing and licking the backside.
1) Discuss and gauge her interest level. If she is doing it just to please you, the experience may not be enjoyable for either party. Enthusiasm is a key ingredient in sexual satisfaction!
3) Begin exploration with sex toys designed especially for anal play. These can include vibrators, beads or dilators. Introduce the play slowly with plenty of lubrication. As some of these toys have multiple uses (both anal and vaginal), remember to always thoroughly clean the
toy after use in each area.
4) Always have on hand a variety of lubrication! Try water based and silicone lubrication. Silicone lubrication will not absorb as easily into the skin and is ideal for anal sex play. However, never use silicone lubrication with silicone sex toys! This combination will destroy your toys!
5) If you try everything and she does not respond positively, don't continue to pressure her! Anal play is only one aspect of sexual exploration. Use this experience as a springboard for even more exploration and satisfaction.
Michelle MacBain is a graduate student from Kansas City. She studied sexuality, psychology and communication studies at KU and The University of Amsterdam.
Contributed Photo
CATCH OF THE WEEK // TED MCNULTY > A weekly peek at a fish in the KU sea.
> A weekly peek at a fish in the KU sea.
Contributed photo
YEAR: Senior
HOMETOWN: Iowa City, Iowa
MAJOR: Communications
INTERESTED IN: Women
HOBBIES: Napping on the couch, practicing karate in the garage and putt-putt golfing. I'm a pretty fun guy.
TURN-DNS. Someone with a good smile, great childbearing hips and lower back dimples.
Those are sexy. And someone who can make me laugh, play sports and is athletic.
IF THE COULD BE ANY CANTOON
CHARACTER, HE WOULD BE: Crimson Chin
from "The Fairly OddParents." I too fight
crime with my sexy butt chin...in spandex.
TURN-OFFS: Girls that are stuck up, have cankles and don't laugh at my jokes.
IF HE COULD BE ANY CARTOON
HIS GUILTY PLEASURE: Watching crappy reality television, like "Real World," "Teen Mom" and "Jersey Shore." It's fun to be able to watch somebody else do something you would never want to be doing.
BEST PRANK HE'S EVER PULLED: I saran-
wrapped my friend's toilet below the seat,
but his mom was the one who ended up
using it first!
FAVORITE SONG TO KARAOKE: I can't choose one. Either "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred, Ja Rule and Ashanti duets with my best friend Tim or the classics like "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey and "I Want You Back" by *NSync.
CHRISTINE CURTIN
HOW WE MET // KRISTAN TINOCO AND DAMIAN MORA > All great relationships had to start somewhere.
Twelve-year-old kids often act like they're too cool for just about anything, which is exactly how Damian Mora, a senior from Kansas City, reacted when he met Kristan Tinoco, also a senior from Kansas City.
Kristan and Damian first met in seventh grade while at a Bishop Miege High School football game. Although they went to different schools, they had mutual friends and ended up approaching each other at the game.
"I had a crush on him initially, but he wasn't having it at first," Kristan says. "He was being kind of stupid because we were in seventh grade and he was trying to be cool around his friends."
Damian even admits that although he knew Kristan liked him, he didn't really want anything to do with it. "I talked to her for about five seconds and then went back to my friends and said, 'No, I don't like her,'" Damian says.
But that wasn't the end of it. Damian and Kristan saw each other at dance mixers for their two schools, and eventually started having more friendly conversations. They started dating shortly after.
Now that Damian and Kristan have been dating for eight years, it's safe to say he isn't too cool anymore to admit he likes her.
CHRISTINE CURTIN
The one thing working in Gill's favor right now is his contract, which doesn't include a buyout. If he was fired, he would receive the remaining salary left on his five-year deal. At $2 million per year, he is set to receive $6 million more after this season.
Contributed photo
Playing It Cool: Damian acted like he didn't want anything to do with Kristan when they met in seventh grade.
It's common knowledge that most college football coaches need at least three seasons to get their affairs in order, and besides that, it's highly unlikely KU Athletic Director Sheahon Zenger has the resources to shell out around $10 million to dismiss Gill and his assistants as well as hire a completely new staff. But if enough angry, big-money donors bang on Zenger's door and open up their checkbooks — and that's a big 'if' — things could change quickly.
From what I witnessed first-hand last year and have heard this season, players love playing for Gill they just haven't been able to win for him. Barring any monumental upsets, Gill will have six wins or fewer after two years on the job.
a stand-up guy and a successful football coach don't always go hand in hand.
Sophomore cornerback Tyler Patton pulls an Oklahoma State ball carrier to the ground near midfield during the first quarter of Saturday night's game at Boone Pickens Stadium. Patton had four tackles against OSU along with a defensive pass interference while in the end zone during the second quarter.
CHRIS NEAL/KANSAN
Yes, it was against a mix of first, second and third string defenders that the Kansas offense faced in the fourth quarter, but the 14 points Kansas scored at the end of the game Saturday showed that the offense is resilient. The 28 total points Kansas scored helps put in perspective just how poorly this Kansas defense has been playing.
stayed for the final act of the Jayhawks' blowout loss to the Cowboys watched their team get out-scored in the fourth quarter to Kansas.
— Edited by Jonathan Shorman
Scoring 28 points against the 6. team in the nation, is no small accomplishment. Scoring 28 points would've been good enough to win 11 FBS games last week and tie two of them. Instead of being the 12th winning team in college football with 28-points or fewer, the Jayhawks lost by 42.
Kansas actually scored one more point than Oklahoma State has allowed on average all season. The biggest margin of victory the Cowboys had before
have put Kansas on track to win 20 games that week. Of every team that scored more than 34 points and lost in week five of the college football season, Kansas had the largest deficit, falling by 11 points.
Following the Oklahoma State game, coach Turner Gill broke down the defensive woes into two simple categories: "Our guys did not tackle quite as well, as far as early on," Gill said. "And the second thing is the guys were not doing what they were told to do in some cases."
It's a combination of a lack of athleticism, play-making and tackling that have led to the team's struggles, Gill said.
Sophomore cornerback Tyler Patmon suggested Wednesday that there is only one way to fix the defenses' problem: practice.
By admitting that some players are not following their coaches' instructions on the field, Gill helps shed some light on the defense, which ranks 34 yards worse than any other FBS team.
"When it comes down to it, it's
It appears that the Jayhawks got the message. Freshman linebacker Ben Heeney said a few of the players asked their teammates to pick up their performance on the practice field.
consistency," Patmon said. "We have to go hard in practice no matter what."
"The past two days, our
Volu
defensive practices have been 100-fold better than what it's been," Heeney said. "I just think we look a lot better even from last week to this week."
Gill said the team has practiced with more focus and energy the past two days. He said there is urgency with the team in practice, because they know
4
they have to be on all cylinders against No. 3 Oklahoma this Saturday.
If the play in practice has improved, the Jayhawks' defensive performance this season has served as a wake up call.
— Edited by Alexandra Esposito