Volume 124 Issue 31
kansan.com
Monday, October 3, 2011
Jayhawks have third-quarter blues Three interceptions blow a 20-0 lead PAGES 6-7
RETWEET
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LAWRENCE
SPEAK
last chance
An out-of-body experience gave this writer a final goodbye TAYLOR LEWIS
The phone rang around 2 a.m. on September 25, 2008. I awoke with a jolt. My heart pounded as I strained to hear my mom's muffled words. Seconds later, she silently tiptoed into my room and gently shook me awake, even though I was alert and bracing myself for what was coming. "That was Research Hospital. Uncle Walter was admitted earlier today, and I'm going to run down there." I relaxed slightly. Although unfortunate, I had gotten used to Uncle Walter's ailments through the years.
I can't remember exactly when my uncle was diagnosed with kidney disease; I was too young to understand the significance. Even though I only saw him sporadically through the year, I knew that he was on dialysis three times per week. Other than that, everything was pretty much the same. Recently, he'd been
more tired than normal and had lost a substantial amount of weight, but nothing had really changed.
He was still the man who wasn't afraid to speak his mind. I know this because he, a KU journalism graduate, practically threatened me with sudden death if I even considered attending Mizzou.
He was still the man who racked up a repertoire of stories that were immortalized in family history, perhaps the most famous being when he was 3-years-old and crept out of bed during one of my grandparents' notorious cocktail parties. He answered the door and kindly offered the arriving guests a glass of scotch.
He was still the man who was strong and determined. His tough exterior and tough loving was nothing but a faade; anyone who
knew him understood just how much he cared for his loved ones.
Yes, he was ill, but he always pulled through. "Besides," I thought. "I'm pretty sure that this isn't the first time Mom has left to be with him at the hospital."
As my mom rushed out of the house, I rolled over and tried to sleep. But for an hour, I tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable. I finally turned to face my dresser and nodded off.
After what felt like only seconds, I awoke again. But the thing is, I didn't actually wake up. My body was still unconscious, but my mind was awake. While my body was lying limly in bed, my eyes were staring at my dresser. My head was swimming with repressed worry for Uncle Walter. My ears were filled with the silence of the night. Until that silence was broken.
I saw a burst of light and Uncle Walter's voice filled my room. I couldn't see him, but I could hear him. I felt his presence occupy the narrow space between my bed and my dresser. I could sense that he was in a hurry. I could almost feel a force rushing him, and my mind knew that he didn't have a lot of time to spend with me.
His words were indecipherable, though. He was speaking rapidly, desperately trying to tell me something. I couldn't understand a word; all I could gather was that he was scared. His strong voice was wavering, laced with fear, and he sounded terrified.
I interrupted him. "Uncle Walter," I calmly said. "You have to slow down. I can't understand anything that you're saying." But as soon as the words left my mouth, I could feel him turn sharply to his right, looking in the direction opposite of where he had come. He paused, and I froze. I felt him look at me. And in a much calmer voice, he simply said, "I have to go now." And then I felt him really look at me as he said, "I love you."
Seconds passed and I didn't say anything, I knew that as soon as I uttered those words, that would be it and Uncle Walter would be gone. I put off saying anything for as long as possible. But finally, neither he – nor I – could wait any longer. It was now or never. "I love you, too."
But unlike the rest of our conversation, I actually spoke those four words aloud and woke my body up. This time, it was my own voice that broke the silence of the night. Everything was back to normal. I was awake and could no longer feel Uncle Walter's presence.
I tried my hardest to write off the experience as an odd dream. I wanted to convince myself that my visit with Uncle Walter meant nothing, that Mom would come home, assure me everything was OK, and return to bed herself. I refused to believe that this experience had any significance at all. I returned to my fitful sleep.
A few minutes later, I heard my dog bark - my mom was home. I called downstairs, desperately seeking the reassurance that I needed. "Mom! What happened at the hospital?" After an elongated pause, her voice wafted into my room. "I'll tell you when I get upstairs."
Pretty soon, I heard footsteps. Again, she tipted into my room and sat down on my bed. I immediately knew something had changed; this wasn't normal. "Taylor," she calmly said in the same voice that I had used with Uncle Walter only an hour before. "Uncle Walter died."
For months, I refused to think of that night. I didn't tell anyone about it for a year, and I pushed it to the farthest corners of my memory. Had I dreamt it or did it really happen? I didn't know what to make of my experience, and I was leery to share it with anyone - who would believe me? I hardly believed it myself.
The tears didn't come immediately. I was in shock. Neither the "dream" nor the news itself felt real. The whole night seemed like a movie scene. I wasn't sure what to make of my late-night vision; all I knew was the Uncle Walter was gone.
It wasn't until the anniversary of his death that the whole night came rushing back to me, and I suddenly couldn't hold it in any longer. I called my mom and recounted every detail to her. I told her how he rushed into my room and spoke a mile a minute. I remembered how I felt his presence. I remembered just how strong, determined and loving he was. How he always said what he needed to say. And how he gave me one last story to tell.
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Student authors offer insight, advice on amateur publishing
KELSEY CIPOLLA
kcipolla@kansan.com
While some students refused to shave or looked forward to celebrating the holidays last November, Jason Held, a senior from Minneapolis, wrote a novel. For writers across the country November is National Novel Writing Month, an online contest that challenges participants to write 50,000 words in 30 days.
Held initially had no intention of participating, but other members of the Jayhawk-Writers on Campus group, or J-WOC, convinced him to participate in the arduous contest.
His book, "The Write Message," follows a 15-year-old boy who hires a literary agent and pursues a publishing deal while trying to balance high school, the challenges of the industry and familial loss. Select chapters of the protagonist's own writing are also included.
"You have to go in there knowing what your book is going to be about," Held said. "I didn't have a complete outline for it, but I knew what it was about."
J-WOC teamed up with KU
"We teamed up with Hewlett-Packard a year ago to start this project and they gave us grant money to come up with ideas to encourage printing on campus," said Rachel Barnes, the KU Bookstores custom material specialist. "What we came up with was the book contest."
After months of editing and revising, Held's book was finally ready for publication. The Print-
Bookstores to incentivize competing in the contest. Participants who met the 50,000 word minimum would have a chance to publish their book.
"We were serving as a small scale publisher for him," said Barnes. The bookstore also coordinated selling the book in the store and through Amazon.
Julie Honn, outreach and communications officer for J-WOC and a senior from Lenexa, said Held's success is encouraging to other student writers.
On-Demand center, which allows students, faculty, and community members to print and bind their own works, helped produce "The Write Message."
"It shows that it's achievable, to achieve that balance and achieve
CLASSIFIEDS 11
CROSSWORD 4
Although the novel was published last April, Held is still shocked to have actually published a book.
"It's a really strange feeling," he said. "I almost couldn't believe it, but I knew it was my story, I knew I wrote it. I had spent months on it."
Held will discuss his book today at 5 p.m. at Jayhawk Ink inside the Kansas Union. There will also be a panel discussion with other
CRYPTOQUIPS 4
OPINION 5
SPORTS 12
SUDOKU 4
that dream" Honn said. "That's what everybody who writes does it for, that I hope somebody reads it someday."
student writers about students' writing experiences.
Edited by Josh Kantor
All contents, unless stated otherwise, © 2011 The University Daily Kansan
Student Author Reading
Jasen field will read from
and discuss his new novel
"The Write Message."
Monday October 3, 201
5:00pm - 6:30pm
Ticket Cost: Free
Don't forget
Don't forget to floss! October is National Dental Hygiene Month.
Today's weather
Forecasts done by University students. For a more detailed forecast, see page 2A.
HI: 85
L0: 43
Last call for jean shorts.