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I walked into the house less than 15 seconds ago and already my Dad has handed me a stack of extensive "research" on law schools. He thinks that Googling a law school gives him makes him an expert on the subject. I can't help but roll my eyes and sigh heavily.
"I'm just applying to different places, Dad, not making a final decision. I've been researching schools for hours. Please just drop it."
"Do you know how much tuition costs at Iowa? It's over $42,000 a year. KU is the logical choice. It doesn't make sense for you to apply ..."
Suddenly, I can't take anymore of his "logic." I can feel my face flush and the anger rise up my throat and spill out of my mouth. I'm screaming now. "How dare you even imply I'm not taking this seriously! It literally consumes my thoughts! You just can't handle even the idea of me leaving you! That's all this is!"
The rest of the confrontation is a blur as we hurl accusations back and forth and the insults intensify. I make it a point to slam the door as hard as I can as I storm out of the house. What a lovely visit home.
That was the typical outcome of conversations — or rather screaming matches — with my Dad as I was applying for law school. Deciding a future life path is complicated enough without having a meddling father. You see, I'm an only child. I didn't have the experience of deciding where to go for college. It was pretty much predetermined before my birth that I would follow in my parents' footsteps and become a Jayhawk. So potentially leaving home was a whole new frontier for me.
My Dad and I are two very different people. I love traveling and don't get homesick, one of the reasons exploring law schools away from home was an attractive option. He couldn't understand that. He's someone who stayed within 30 miles of where he was born and he never intends to leave. Even though I'm only 30 minutes away, my Dad still misses me intensely. Imagine what hours would do to him.
As I applied to law schools other than KU, my Dad's idea of KU Law as the best, and only, option intensified. His "research" of schools consisted of biased Google searches that only explored the pitfalls of all other schools. KU stood alone as the most logical, convenient, and of course, cheapest choice.
I'd excitedly tell my Dad about ways I'd learned to defray the high tuition rates at Iowa, or about the school in California where I'd gotten a hefty scholarship. His response was silence, then a grunt.
"Hmm."
"Isn't that exciting, Dad?
"I had no idea you had gotten a scholarship there."
"Dad, that's not true. I told you about it the other day."
"Well I don't know anything about it!
It was evident that there was more going on than just an aversion to high costs. I asked my mom one day why he couldn't support my decision.
"As a parent, from day one you're preparing your kids to leave the nest," she said. "You have to prepare them, and yourself, for when they inevitably start their own life. Your Dad hasn't come to terms with you leaving yet."
And so the dilemma. As I tried to make this decision for myself, my Dad pressured me to decide on KU not simply for his aforementioned "logical" reasoning, but because he was afraid. He was afraid of losing his little girl.
This fear had manifested itself in ugly fights and lackluster responses at the news of my acceptance at other schools. It wasn't that my Dad wasn't proud of me, or didn't have faith that I could make the decision on my own. He was simply clinging onto his daughter. With a clearer understanding of where he was coming from, I asked him one day about why he was pressuring me to choose KU.
"Dad, all logical reasoning aside, do you think you might be favoring KU because it's the closest school?"
A long pause. "I think that's certainly a possi- bility, yes."
"I need you to understand that this is ultimately my life and my decision. I just want your support, but I honestly don't feel I have it unless I choose KU."
Another prolonged silence. "I'll try my hardest to have an open mind."
And there it was; the subtle admission I had been waiting for. We had tentatively climbed onto the elephant in the room. It was the first conversation we'd about law school that didn't involve yelling. After that, my Dad made a conscious effort to temper his enthusiasm for KU. He let me do my own research and visit other schools. Most importantly, he listened when I talked.
After a too-good-to-be-true scholarship offer from KU, my Dad got his wish and I enrolled at KU Law. But I didn't make the decision for him. I made it because it was the best choice for me.
THE TIES THAT BIND
LIVING, LOVING AND LEAVING THE NEST
Contributed photo
There's no manual for making the transition from child to adult. There's not a formula telling you the sudden instant you — not your parents — have control over your life. It's an individual process and it's clear that my Dad and I have a slower pace.
But maybe now we'll have a better understanding of each other and my Dad can start to let go. I realize now that instead of severing the ties — or rather the rope — that binds us together, I'm going to have to cut it one string at a time. After all, I am an only child and my Daddy's only little girl.
Becky Howlett
University to institute wireless improvements
BOBBY BURCH
bburch@kansan.com
As students settle in for the new academic year, the University of Kansas' department of Information and Technology is busy improving services and telecommunication around campus.
After meeting with student body President Libby Johnson and Vice President Gabe Bliss, University IT began a project to expand wireless internet to frequently used areas of campus. The wireless expansion, which will continue throughout the fall semester, will eventually reach areas including Jayhawk Boulevard, Wescoe beach and Potter Lake.
However, as IT expands wireless to new areas of campus, some students have expressed concerns about the University's existing Wi-Fi internet access.
Ann Erickson, a senior from Tonganoxie, replied to a University Daily Kansan inquiry on student wireless experience so far this year.
"It's terrible," Erickson wrote. "From experience, it only works in certain areas and even then it's slow and cuts out."
Patrick Henke, a senior from Olathe, expressed similar concerns about KU's wireless reliability.
"We have problems in our room where it cuts in and out," Henke said.
Julie Loats, director of Enterprise Applications and Services for University IT, said that the merger of University IT and IDS will help
In an effort to provide better service and more efficient technology support, University IT hired the Huron Consulting Group Inc., to review its technology services around campus in the summer of 2010. The group's report outlined that:
The University is behind the curve in terms of supporting technology-enhanced teaching in the classroom.
In an email notifying University deans, directors and department chairs of the new changes, Diane Goddard, Vice Provost for Administration and Finance, wrote that: "By fall 2011, we hope that the plan for increased academic technology support will be well on its way to filling the gap at KU."
Classroom standards have not been set, resulting in variable capabilities.
Overall need for more consistent consulting-level support for faculty and students related to technologies.
Following Huron's recommendations, the University's Instructional Development Services (IDS) merged its operations with the IT department, taking effect last spring.
Loats said that University IT hopes to further its service efforts by offering Blackboard technology support to students.
"It brings all of those staff together so it can be a more focused and holistic approach to classroom support," Loats said.
"One of the things we heard last spring loud and clear was that students didn't feel they had a place to go if they needed help with blackboard," Loats said. "With this merger wlde like to be able to provide more support for students."
provide comprehensive technology support for students and faculty.
Edited by Jayson Jenks
CHECK OUT THE UPCOMING WIRELESS LOCATIONS
http://udkne.ws/qmL96
CLASSIFIEDS 10 CRYPTOQUIPS 4 SPORTS 12
CROSSWORD 6 OPINION 7 SUPOKU 4
all contents, unless stated otherwise. © 2011 The University Daily Kansan
Don't forget
Today's weather
It's library card sign-up month. To check out books from any of KU's libraries, just flash a KU ID!
Forecasts done by University students. For a more detailed forecast see page 2A.
HI: 74
LO: 48
Perfect!
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