THU 11 THE BUILDERS AND THE BUTCHERS
AMPLE BRANCHES • ORMUS GOLD
FRI 12 THE NIGHT MARCHERS
COLOUR REVOLT • MEMBERS OF DRIVE LIKE JEHU
SAT 13 FEARBEFORETHEMARCHOFFLAMES
DAMERIA 1 AM THE OCEAN/ ALL AGES 8PM
SUN 14 RARARIOT
WALTER MEEGÝ·PEPI GINSBERG·LETTER DIVISION
MON 15  IMPAILED
PHOBIA ILLOGICIST-MARUTA-ARES KINGDOM
PHOBIA ILLOGICIST-MARUTA-ARES KINGDOM
TUE 16 YOOD FREE FLOW!
PSYCH-ROCKIN BABIS FROM TEL-AVIV!
THU 18 BOUNCE;KJHK LIVE BROADCAST
RARE SOUL / RB/ 9PM
THU 11 FROMANHOLE
THE DACTYLS
FRI 12 LAWRENCE SOUL CLUB ON THE MATTE
SAT 13 VAMPIRE HANDS
JUICEBOOK*HAIY BELAFONTE*DJ ROBERT MOORE
SUN 14 WINFIELD WARMUP 6PM
THE CALAMITY CUBES J.R. & THE JUNIORS
BILLY THE SQUIRREL WISEACRES
SUN 14 OXFORD COLLAPSE LOVE AS LAUGHER: ROOFTOP VIGILANTES
TUE 16 NICK JAINA HIDDEN PICTURES
I like women in their 30s and 40s. Where's a good place in Lawrence to go "cougar" hunting? John, senior
Francesca: The problem with finding an older, single woman in Lawrence is that she's probably affiliated with the University of Kansas in some way. Few singles stay in Lawrence after graduation because it's not exactly exploding with jobs. Those who do stay get jobs at the University. And, last time I checked, student-teacher relationships were frowned upon.And by browned upon, I mean that's the face you'll be making when she
gets fired and you get kicked out.
But if you like living on the wild side—and it seems like you do—then the best place to find cougars is indeed right here at the University. I know several, single, hot KU staff members who are looking! One of them told me that KU football games are another great place to meet cougars because drunk alumnae won't realize you're a college student if you simply don't sit in the student section.
Outside of the University, your best bet is at the bars. Not at Jet Lag or Abe and Jake's, however, but at more obscure, quiet bars that drunk, immature college freshmen are unlikely to go to, such as Crimson & Brews, 925 Iowa St., or the Eighth Street Tap Room, 801 New Hampshire St. With a name that features the word tap, I don't think you'll have any problems finding a cougar there. The bar also boasts a jukebox and an incredible collection of vinyl records—two things I know older women can't stay away from.
In all seriousness, though, don't count out the lesser-known bars on Mass. Street. I know at least one cougar at the University who frequents Mass. Street bars.
Matt: On game days, as Fran mentioned, the streets near the stadium (Mississippi, Illinois, Alabama and Missouri streets) are crawling with cougars just waiting to pounce on the next young man they see.
I suggest nonchalantly meandering into a large cookout outside the stadium and looking for the woman who brought the desserts. Ignore the woman who brought apple pie, and focus on the vixens who brought the chocolate brownies smothered in even more chocolate. Those are the women who like to live on the wild side.
ried women. I wouldn't want to see you pummeled by a husband already hopped up on football-induced adrenaline when you attempt to make a move on his wife.
Be warned, though. It will probably take months—maybe even years—to decipher between cougars and attractive older, mar-
My girlfriend got a vibrator. I don't understand. Am I not enough for her?
—Eric, senior
Francesca: The problem may not lie in your lovemaking abilities. A 2007 study by Paula England, a sociology professor at Stanford University, found that only 19 percent of college women orgasm during sex, compared with 44 percent of college men. Women have a hard time orgasming during sex because most sexual positions do not stimulate the clitoris, whereas vibrators are created for that specific purpose.
Not to mention that sex is time-consuming. Your girlfriend may not have time to hop on you every time she needs to get off. Opposing class and work schedules—as well as imposing roommates—also make it hard to have sex as often as your girlfriend would probably like.
In addition, girls can only have so much sex before they begin to dry up down there. I can personally say that chafing can halt sexual activities for days.
If you want to maximize your sex life and minimize her use of the vibrator; start focusing more on pleasing her clitoris during sex. And, on the bright side, at least the something else your girlfriend turned to was not someone else!
Matt: Your girlfriend is attempting to reach out to you in some way considering you know about the vibrator and women usually do everything in their power to hide those types of toys.
It's rough not being enough for your significant other.Yes, as Fran mentioned, the penis isn't always as stimulating as a vibrator, but sex can go beyond a physical feeling.You may have chemistry exploding outside the bedroom, but sometimes it doesn't carry over when you cross the bedroom threshold.
I'm guessing this is the first sex-related toy she's purchased because you seem shocked by this news. She is attempting to find her sexual identity, and maybe you should get started on doing that for yourself, too. Missionary position and the routine blow job get old after awhile. It's time to mix it up.
Thinking about your girlfriend being pleasured by something other than you can be disheartening, so I would talk to your girlfriend and see if there's something you can do in bed to out-sex the vibrator. After all, batteries die.And if you get good enough in the bedroom, you can keep going and going and going and going...
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Send us your sex and relationship questions at bitchandmoan@kansan.com.
September 11,2008