Opinion
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY Kansan
Published daily since 1912
Spencer Duncan, Editor
Lindsey Henry, Managing editor
Andrea Albright, Managing editor
Tom Eblen, General manager, news adviser
Sarah Scherwinki, Business manager Brian Pagel, Retail sales manager Dan Simon, Sales and marketing adviser Justin Knupp, Technology coordinator
Thursday, October 9, 1997
Signe / PMILADEPHIA DAILY NEWS
Raving
Columnist gets holy feeling after Brother Jim's preaching
Formicators, masturbators and even a few school administrators gathered Tuesday afternoon for some old fashion' Bible bashin' with the good Brother, Jim Gilles and his trusty sidekick Brother
Brian
For most of the day, these two siblings of the holy scripture took turns saving souls and dueling demons in front of a large crowd of certified sinners.
For those who missed it, let me summarize: I'm going to hell, you're going to hell, we're all going to hell — unless, of course, your name happens to be Brother Jim.
Brother Jim, you see, is a born-again Christian, which means he gave up his former life of pleasure-seeking, indulgence and general sin for one of attention-seeking, intolerance and general obnoxiousness.
Jeff Mudrick
opinion@kansan.com
Sinners beware.
Brother Jim is on a mission to purge your campus of oral sex, anal sex, premarital sex and every other kind of sex he has not had the opportunity to experience.
About anal sex, he noted, "My six-year old son has better sense than to stick items of large circumference up his rectum," and demonstrated with a broad, sweeping motion of the arm with finger extended.
About oral sex, Jim said, "Come on, would you stick pizza up your nose?" (I didn't get it either).
And about bisexuality, he explained, "They're so desperate, they'll take anything they can get."
Of course, the most amazing talent all born-again Christians possess is their uncanny ability to determine another person's eternal fate. Then again, there are only two possibilities — heaven or hell — and they always choose the latter, so maybe it's not so amazing.
But still, what impressed me about Brother Jin in particular was the effort he put forth to assess each person's heaven/hell status on an individual basis before reaching the inevitable conclusion of eternal damnation.
For example, one sinner expressed hope for heaven, noting that he was still a virgin.
“Well, let me ask you this,” Jim said, and then fired off the following questions in quick succession. “Are you a Ho-Mo-Sexual? Have you had oral sex? Do you masturbate?”
To each, the young reprobate answered no. But Jim was
unfazed and continued to drv.
"Have you ever pulled down your girlfriend's underwear? Have you ever looked at her nude? Have you ever fondled her breasts?" Jim asked, sounding more like a perverted obscene caller than a good Christian.
"Uhhh ..." the guy stammered.
"Ah hah!" Jim velled triumphantly. "Burn baby, burn!"
Amn! Jim yelled triumphantly. Burt baby, burn!
See, it turns out, as Brother Jim later explained, that the young miscreant in question may have technically or even physically been a virgin, but he was not a mental virgin — thus his downfall.
Thank God somebody made the distinction. We almost let one slip.
But the obvious question remains.
The reason is that we can still be saved, and by saving us, they can accumulate more points toward that free toaster oven.
If we are all destined for hell, why must Brother Jim and others like him persist in their annoying behavior? Why can't they go sulk and complain in private instead of forcing themselves on the public?
Believe it or not, Brother Jim himself is a former sinner. (Of course, back then he was referred simply as "Jim," or more often, "jerkoff.")
His life was a downward spiral, and eventually hit rock bottom when he realized, "Now my hot rod needed gas, I needed drugs and booze, and my girlfriend needed a pizza."
In his pamphlet, "From Running With the Devil to Walking With Jesus," Brother Jim describes his past experimentation with drugs and alcohol; his obsession with rock-roll, hot rods and racing bikes; and that fateful night when "timet a wicked woman who had a silly mother."
To make a long story short, Brother Jim finally made the tough decision to declare himself better than others and to commit himself to never having to work a real job again. In other words, he became a born-again Christian.
The moral of this story is that any one of us could be the next Brother Jim. (With the exception, Jim says, of homosexuals, Jews, women, minorities, midgets, etc.)
For a moment, I thought it might be me, as I stood listening to the Crazy Christian Jim Gilles, and thought I felt the spirit kickin' and 'a churnin' within me. However, just as I was about to sing my praises, the churning feeling moved up my throat and escaped as a belch.
Oh well. hell it is.
Kansan staff
Bradley Brooks ... Editorial
Jason Strait ... Editorial
Jodie Chester ... News
Jen Smith ... News
Adam Darby ... News
Charity Jeffries ... Online
Kristie Blasi ... Sports
Tommy Gallagher ... Associate Sports
Dave Morantz ... Campus
Eric Weslander ... Campus
Ashleigh Roberts ... Features
Steve Puppe ... Photo
Bryan Volk ... Design, graphics
Mitch Lucas ... Illustrations
Mark McMaster ... Wire
Ann Marchand ... Special sections
Lachelle Rhoades ... News clerk
Mudrick is a Topeka junior in biology.
News editors
Broadon your mind: Today's quote
"A pen is certainly an excellent instrument to fix a man's attention and to inflame his ambition."
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-John Adams, diarv entre of Nov. 14. 1760
Letters: Should be double-spaced typed and fewer than 200 words. Letters must include the author's signature, name, address and telephone number plus class and home-town if a University student. Faculty or staff must identify their positions.
How to submit letters and guest columns
Guest columns: Should be double-spaced typed with fewer than 700 words. The writer must be willing to be photographed for the column to run.
All letters and guest columns should be submitted to the Kansan newsroom, 111 Staffer-Flint Hall. The Kansan reserves the right to edit, cut to length or reject all submissions. For any questions, call Bradley Brooks (brooks@kansan.com) or Jason Strait (jstrait@kansan.com) at 864-4810. If you have general questions or comments, e-mail the page staff (opinion@kansan.com) or call 864-4810.
Feedback
Brooks' column had good points
This may not be what you are expecting, but I understand the stance that Bradley Brooks is coming from. Although his argument was not based on complete knowledge of the facts, he was right in saying that we need to have more of a community in the residence halls.
The way in which Bradley Brooks structured his argument showed that he was saying that we are all at fault, not the residents of 3E. He pointed out that he would not have checked on the person either, just would have rolled over and gone back to sleep. He also related it back to a friend of his who had died the previous summer.
The presentation of his opinion could have been handled in a better way, but the message is correct. We do need to check on each other, regardless of whether or not the person said to leave them alone or not. I would probably tell my neighbors (who are my close friends) to just let me sleep, but if they had continued to hear me, they would have checked on me repeatedly throughout the night.
We are alone up here on campus (no parents) for one of the first times since we were born, and when we are sick is when we need the support of our friends the most. I am not trying to say that the residents of 3E were in the wrong, but rather the entire University needs to be a little more concerned with its neighbors in order for something like this not to happen again. If we all make an attempt now to learn from what happened, we might be able to prevent this from happening to anyone else.
The "Kansan" might have been little more considerate to the residents as to the time at which the column was printed, but being a former newspaper staffer, I know that you must print a story when it is relevant or not at all. A little consideration might have been put into effect and the column delayed a day or two to allow more of a grieving time.
Other than that, I think that Bradley Brooks made a valid point.
Deborah Colston Lansing freshman
It is Oct. 6 and I just got around to reading Bradley Brooks' article. Not tough, considering it is posted in every bathroom in Ellsworth Hall talking about his arrival at 3E on Wednesday.
This is my second year in dealing with these halls and many strange things have happened in Ellsworth. The death of this woman is by far the strangest.
I don't see where people get-off criticizing his article. I think it makes many great points. The last paragraph was especially powerful.
Those who are mad seem to be for no reason. It's like they read the article selectively and only pointed out the things that made them mad. That just isn't fair to anyone — especially a journalist who plans to make a living out of his opinion.
You did the right thing by writing that article because that was what needed to be said.
I would be willing to bet that half of the campus was thinking the exact same thing. I know that I was.
Steven Dale Dallas sophomore
Column damaging to students on floor
My husband and I were appalled by your editorial in the Oct. 3 edition of the "Kansan." We are the parents of a daughter who resides on the 10th floor of Ellsworth
Hall. She called home last Friday morning to share this editorial with me. She was very upset by your words, to put it mildly. It is my understanding that journalists strive for the truth before an article goes to print. Your editorial seems to be written without regard for the facts, the truth or the feelings of some very vulnerable new KU students. Because you were not living on that floor, I don't see how you can know what did or what did not take place there. The autopsy results have not been released so there is no possible way for you to know why Ms. Angie Griffin died or whether her death was preventable. Your article implies to me that the students on her floor did not care about Ms. Griffin's condition and did nothing to assist her. This is absolutely not the case.
The teens on this floor are all freshmen who had been away from home for only six weeks when this tragedy occurred. Within this short time they had, indeed spent much time together and become close. They were aware than Angie Griffin was ill. They had been looking out for her. They had checked on her and helped her. They knew that she had sought medical help. They are now feeling overwhelming sadness and a variety of other emotions. They should not be feeling a truckload of guilt. As a parent, your statement concerns me a great deal. I feel it is very irresponsible of you to judge these young students and to imply that they should feel guilty.
The printed word is a powerful thing. Much damage has been done by your hurtful and judgmental editorial. I hope that you are honorable enough to learn the true facts in this situation and print a retraction. I feel an apology from you is due to each and every student on the 3E floor in Ellsworth Hall. This tragedy has changed these young people forever. I would hope that your newspaper and the University of Kansas will deal promptly and positively with this. The lives and emotional health of these students should be the primary consideration here. No purpose was served by such accusatory words. I feel this article has done anything but "help avoid as world of hurt," as you stated in your column.
I hope that time will bring healing for the residents of 10th floor. The memory of Angie Griffin will always stay with them. I think it is important that they strive to move forward in their lives. They face a difficult challenge to be successful students with all the negative things they have experienced. I am personally concerned about the effect your words have had on our daughter. One week prior to Angie's death she lost a high school classmate in an auto accident. She did not need or deserve the pain your editorial caused her. In the future, I hope that you will consider the repercussions your words may have on your fellow KU students.
Lynne Baker Topeka resident
Obermueller does his job,hits targets
I just couldn't resist writing. I never fail to get a chuckle out of Andy Obermueller's columns and the squeals of protest they draw.
He certainly must be doing something right — he seems to draw a nasty response from someone with nearly every column. The lunatic fringe addedt to sucking up student fee money must still be seething from your common sense on financing from the Student Senate.
And you are correct, Andy. While we should encourage participation as best we reasonably can, voting is in fact a privilege, not a right. It is granted to members of the polity who qualify. Nothing draws blood on a sacred cow like a dose of reality and common sense, does it?
As long as the targets keep screaming, you must be hitting the mark. I'll start to worry when you adopt the milk-toast approach and attempt to please everyone. Anything worth saying is going to infuriate someone. Just keep up the target practice.
James Watts Lawrence Law Student
Director honored by those he helped
Gerald Harris' death last Wednesday was the first sad news for me since I arrived at the University in early August. It surprised me a great deal.
Only seven weeks ago, at the opening ceremony of the international student's orientation, he could still speak to us lively and energetically.
I remember some advice he gave to us: Because the fee for replacing the I-90 (white card) was much higher than that of the I-20, "if you really want to lose one of these forms, lose the I-20," he said. We burst out laughing.
I remember that night at the welcome party he took every chance he had to talk to the new international students. I talked to him for a while. His easygoing and warm character gave me a feeling that seemed not that of a director of the International Student Services, but of a father of the international students.
He cared about our interests, and assured us that the ISS was ready to help us. I remember the solemn but heartening scene when he led his staff members in singing the national anthem of the U.S.
I remember him. With autumn approaching, the weather sunny, warm and breezy, everything under the light blue sky is shining. He is not here anymore.
Lai Yung Kwok Hong Kong freshman
Political correctness taken too far
I've never written to a paper before, but I just can't hold this in any longer.
I don't know why I continue to read the "Feedback" letters everyday, knowing they are going to infuriate me and make me embarassed for a large group of "women." These sorority girls have way too much time on their hands to whine and bitch about every little thing that doesn't amount to anything. First it was the "quit picking on the Greeks" for the stripper incident, the serenading thing and now this "sexual harassment" nonsense for the melon caption. Grow up girls, and focus on real issues. And, yeah, I would tell my mom, "nice melons," anytime I thought it would make a funny pun and we would laugh about it together.
If the greeks want to quit getting bad press they should quit making it happen in the first place. If the girls wanted to be considered real women and mature adults, they should learn to laugh at life instead of getting their white cotton briefs in a bunch.
I think "Kansan" has had great stories and fun headlines/captions. I've also heard this mentioned by other people who read the paper. Good for you! That's what college life and "real life" should be about, finding the humor in our lives and hardships. There's no time for prudishness. I learned that from my great-grandmother who lived life to the fullest with a strong will and big smile.
Christi Barb Wichita resident and KU alumna
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