Opinion
HE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
United States First Amendment
United States First Amendment Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 10,2009
Bornstein: 1,138 reasons to legalize gay marriage
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--our society.
My heart is broken and I have poop in my pants.
--our society.
I'm 21 years old and I just lost my last baby tooth. Do you think the tooth fairy pays interest?
If you say your favorite movie is "Top Gun," I say you're a tool.
I'm watching Clint Eastwood in "The Outlaw Josey Wales" and I just saw a Kansas Jayhawk reference. Rock chalk Jayhawk, go KU!
I sleep real good cause I ain't got no warrants!
All my friends shunned me for not being Greek.
--our society.
I can do anything. Just take a look, it's in a book, the "Reading Rainbow."
--our society.
I'm 20 years old and I pee in the shower. So what?
--our society.
I want to know Big Jay's views on gay marriage.
--our society.
Big Jay is probably more concerned with his own species' issues than he is with ours. For example: Why he has such a hard time finding ANY mate
--our society.
Marriage is a sacred institution only for those who are mascots. Not being a mascot is immoral and evil, and one day, non-mascotality will corrupt the very fabric of our society
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--to the point where she requires medical attention, the significant other will only be charged with a misdemeanor. Chances are, that person will not even spend more than 48 hours in jail for the first offense. Of course, there are counseling programs designed to help the abuser learn not to abuse again, but Kemple has her doubts about the effectiveness of these programs. And rightfully so, seeing as she sees more than half of the abusers she prosecutes again.
Wait, so Taylor Swift hosted SNL this weekend and the KU student population didn't shit a collective brick? Impressive.
You know what will never stop being awesome? Frostys.
FFA, you're more dependable than friends. I can always count on you to help me procrastinate.
--to the point where she requires medical attention, the significant other will only be charged with a misdemeanor. Chances are, that person will not even spend more than 48 hours in jail for the first offense. Of course, there are counseling programs designed to help the abuser learn not to abuse again, but Kemple has her doubts about the effectiveness of these programs. And rightfully so, seeing as she sees more than half of the abusers she prosecutes again.
--to the point where she requires medical attention, the significant other will only be charged with a misdemeanor. Chances are, that person will not even spend more than 48 hours in jail for the first offense. Of course, there are counseling programs designed to help the abuser learn not to abuse again, but Kemple has her doubts about the effectiveness of these programs. And rightfully so, seeing as she sees more than half of the abusers she prosecutes again.
Am I the only one who secretly has a bit of a thing for the girl from the "Education Connection" commercials?
I just had amazing sex. Homework? What homework?
It's really sad when I see a boy wearing the same pants as me, and his butt looks better than mine
--to the point where she requires medical attention, the significant other will only be charged with a misdemeanor. Chances are, that person will not even spend more than 48 hours in jail for the first offense. Of course, there are counseling programs designed to help the abuser learn not to abuse again, but Kemple has her doubts about the effectiveness of these programs. And rightfully so, seeing as she sees more than half of the abusers she prosecutes again.
Either women on campus are becoming less attractive or I'm becoming less of an alcoholic.
POLITICALLY CORRECT President Obama's report card
It was a little more than a year ago when Barack Obama was elected president. The initial excitement of this historic election was quickly overshadowed by the many critical issues facing America. Though there remain many challenges — including Afghanistan and health care reform — this week three of our political columns take a look at the Obama presidency.
Obama has brought the hope of a more inclusive culture by changing employers' abilities to deny equal pay to people based on gender. He's also set in motion the closing of the Guantanamo Bay prison in an attempt to remind the world that America isn't a collective jerk. And then there's changing American health care so that everyone can, you know, have it.
Last week's round of special elections were supposedly a referendum on the president's performance. Even taking those elections into account, President Obama has been off to a good start. The Nobel Prize was surprising, but exciting, and health care reform passed in the House of Representatives last weekend.
I'd grade the President a "Ba" right now. The only thing keeping him from earning an "A" is that he set expectations so high last year that people have grown restless basically because he hasn't turned the Rocky Mountains into gold (yet).
- Cohen is a Topeka senior in political science.
A year after Obama's election and nine months after taking office, the economy is a mixed bag, the fate of the war in Afghanistan remains in limbo and slow progress on health care reform has so far yielded only an imperfect victory in the House.
The counterfactual is always difficult to assess, but it remains clear that had the U.S. government not taken decisive action in those worst days of the financial crisis, things would be a whole lot worse, and the Obama administration has maintained an even keel through the worst recession since the Great Depression. In these tough times, that is precisely what the President needs to do. I give him a B+
But keep in mind that we have just marked another auspicious anniversary, the collapse of Lehman Brothers, which should remind us that there is only so much that even the president can do, given the sheer size and scope of the problems we face.
— Thompson is a Topeka senior in economics.
One year ago. President-elect Obama was hailed as a "dazzling unifier" who transcended "politics as usual."
He promised hope, change, bi-partisanship and transparency. He promised to allow five days of public comment before signing bills. He promised to negotiate health care reform in public sessions televised on CSPAN.
Instead, the health care bill (in the House) was made behind closed doors and without Republicans present. Virtually no time was given to read the 1,990-page bill and it was passed in the wee hours of the night on a Saturday in a strict partyline vote.
Obama set the bar high as he made his bold promises. Failing to deliver on those promises and lacking any serious accomplishments, his approval rating is falling hard and fast. If actions speak louder than words and results mean more than intentions, it is hard to give this president anything but a failing grade so far.
Compton is a Wichita senior in political science.
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HUMAN RIGHTS
Domestic violence laws considered inconsistent
A few weeks ago, I read a couple of articles published in The Economist that enlightened me on unjust sex laws. One told the story of a woman who, when she was 17, was arrested for performing oral sex on a classmate "three weeks shy of his 16th birthday." She now will be labeled as a sex offender for the rest of her life
During Domestic Violence Awareness Week, Eve Kemple, the assistant district attorney for Douglas County, and Attorney Kenzie Singleton spoke about what they viewed as inconsistencies in domestic violence laws.
Conviction because of a verbal threat — for example, "Get away from me or I'll kill you" — incurs harsher punishment than a domestic battery charge, Singleton said. This is because the threat is charged as a felony whereas domestic battery is only a misdemeanor crime.
Kemple said that when prosecuting a stalking incident, it is often better to prosecute for a "higher level" crime — for example, if the stalker broke into the victim's home — than simply a stalking misdemeanor.
So, if a woman (or man's) significant other punches her
domestic adversity in Kansas does.
In Kansas, urinating in public also qualifies as a sexual offense.
So, all of you college boys have another reason to be careful when you're out at the bars on the weekend. Even if you're completely safe, if you make the mistake of peeing into a bush, your life could be changed forever. I'm sure you never realized you could be forced to live outside a 100-yard radius of a school for the rest of your life because of that silly decision. You probably didn't think it would cause other parents to warn their kids to stay away from you because you're on a list with sexual predators and child molesters.
This also means that the woman who consented to a suggestion by her classmate that she perform oral sex on him received harsher punishment than a domestic abuser in Kansas does.
I am highly in favor of rehabilitating abusers so they can overcome the psychological issues that cause them to be violent or emotionally abusive to a friend or loved one. But I also think we need to re-evaluate our justice system.
The more atrocious crimes should receive the harsher punishment. Rehabilitation programs and legal procedures should meet necessary standards instead of providing habitual abusers a "map" of ways to get around the system.
This issue affects every citizen in Kansas — students included. It should be a high priority of our legislators.
Cosby is an Overland Park sophomore in journalism and political science.
BLOG: GREEN MY GUY
My boyfriend Austin and I hiked with a friend of ours in a nearby old-growth forest one afternoon last week to escape the stresses of school, work and other responsibilities. Walking amongst those tall, silent giants, a sense of peace and calm overcame the three of us, who only hours before were jittery with anxiety and stress.
Man versus wild
I felt like a hobbit in Fangorn Forest — minus the ears and hairy feet of course.
Hours later, forced by the setting sun to leave, we headed back to "civilization." As we drove into town, I wondered how we've become so separated from our
After all, we are still members of a food web — though one we control to a great extent. We still drink water from the same rivers and breathe the air as other living things. And after we die, we become part of the same earth once more. So why is there this distinction between "man" and "nature?"
natural environment.
— Janie Chen is a junior from Oatle.
Her sustainability blog can be read at
greenmeyguy.worldpress.com.
Much of our mental and emotional disconnect comes from a physical disconnect. We get our water from faucets, our energy from sockets and our food from grocery stores. Nature no longer feels like a part of who we are, but has become some faraway, outdoor "thing."
This disconnect keeps us from
realizing how dependent we are on the balanced life processes on earth. We need clean water to drink, clean air to breathe and a variety of food to eat so that we don't just survive, but live. Yet we continue to dump chemicals into our rivers, send greenhouse gases into our atmosphere and build monocultures of crops.
This week I simply urge you to reconnect with Mother Earth a little bit. Take a walk, lie under a leafy tree or chase squirrels like Austin does. How are you connected to the earth?
MARIAM SAIFAN
Proper etiquette in the modern world
Somewhere between the rise of the reality TV star and "sexting," the etiquette book genre gave up.
This is unfortunate. Without books to explain the protocol for delicate social situations, we are left to guess what is appropriate. This doesn't just leave room for error — it all but guarantees complete social ruin.
I've actually seen the inside of one of these books. Inside the dusty covers I found sketches of women in skirts large enough to hide a mini fridge and up to three human adults (for entirely genteel reasons, I'm sure).
The book provided instructions on how to "mix" at social functions. It said not to bore people by talking only about myself. Good advice for any era.
I've decided to devote this week's column to picking up where those earnest old books left off with the following examples:
Situation One: You are in a hotel in Kansas City, having stayed there the night before the Border Showdown, waiting for an elevator to arrive. Through a complex chain of events, you happen to be holding a plastic laundry bag filled with your own vomit, which you mean to dispose of in the hotel dumpster. You hope for an empty elevator, but when the bell dings and the elevator doors open, you look inside at a smiling mother, father and two teenage children, all dressed in Mizzou sweatshirts.
What do you do? Etiquette protocol calls for you to decline the elevator ride and take the stairs, right? No! These are Mizzou fans, remember. Toss the contents of your bag into the elevator, aim for their
Well, the skirts have gotten infinitesimally smaller since that book was written, and life has gotten more complex — but no less awkward.
Situation Two: You are on a date and enjoying a drink in a murkily lit bar when you notice that this highly intelligent, achingly attractive person you are with has a dead or nearly dead gnat on their cheek.
sweatshirts and shout, "Rock Chalk!" at the family. Then run, being sure to raise your knees up high to show your cultivation and grace.
However, you cannot be sure that it is, in fact, a dead gnat. What if it's a mole you haven't noticed until now? Your date would likely be sensitive about it and you should be, too.
You have two etiquette options here: (a) Glance furtively at the object throughout the night. Move in closer to get a better view. Your date will notice the increased intimacy between you two. When you start squinting at the object, your date should start scratching at that part of his or her face self-consciously. The object, if it's extraneous, will be removed in time.
You can also: (b) Lean in seductively toward your date and start blowing their cheek so as to remove the object yourself. Let your date think this blowing is a creative kind of foreplay, but be sure the stream of air is powerful. You don't want to leave a wing still stuck to the skin.
That's all we have time for this week. Follow these instructions and you will thrive in today's complex social climate.
Unglesbee is an Overland Park senior in creative writing and economics.
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