NOTICE
wescoe wit
lol.
PROFESSOR:
You can tell your daddy, 'The more skin showing, the better.'
**GIRL:** It was so weird — I walked into this party and she was there. I was like, 'Hey, Mom. What's up?'
GUY (shouting):
I've always wanted a car made of gold!
**GUY 1:** What's the difference between a blue book and a green book?
GIRL 1: Oh my god! You got your hair blonded!
The moonlight is the reflection of the sun.
PROFESSOR:
GUY 2: Green books are for people with a guilty conscience.
GIRL: And that's exactly why vampires aren't real.
PROFESSOR:
If I seem a little loopy today, it's the drugs.
// VALERIE SKUBAL
celebritweets // SARAH SILVERMAN (SarahKSilverman) Twitter musings of the rich and/or famous.
I know it's sexist but I think it's kind of gross when women talk about masturbating. That's why I'm not going to talk about it.
4:16 PM Oct 28th
Hello New York City. You're looking well. I'm very happy to be in you.
4:41 PM Oct 26th
It's funny that big muscle guys work out with kettlebells because separately you really can't find gayer words than "kettle" or "bell." 7:03 PM Oct 19th
I am wearing a dress. 12:52 AM Oct 18th
Tomorrow I'm getting my teeth cleaned. I'm gonna sit down & say "clean my teeth, Stupid." Then I'll open my mouth really wide & just wait 11:23 PM Oct 12th
last row of the plane, against out of order lavatory&in the middle of two strangers. Should anything happen know I died w very little hope.
7:51 PM Oct 11th
I feel pretty lucky. Thousands of people die every day and it's never me.
11:53 PM Sep 27th
Um, my boobs are down here.
1:25 AM Sep 26th
// TAKEN FROM TWITTER.COM BY VALERIE SKUBAL
tomorrow's news // PSSSSST
Rinse, lather, repeat. Rinse, lather, repeat. Shampooing your hair can get so boring. But there's an easier way.
Although it resembles a can of hair spray, Pssssst Instant Spray Shampoo makes shampooing so last week. Psssssst works by absorbing the oil in your hair, making it feel and look clean.
Not only is it great for a quick hair fix, but it's also recommended for use during camping trips, when ill, and after playing sports. Because who wants to shower after playing a long, sweaty, contact sport? Way too much effort.
There is one problem, though. If used too often, the spray will cause a white buildup on the hair. Lauren Precopia, Dallas senior, says she has unfortunately experienced the problem. "It's great if you want to use it in-between washes," she says. "But if you use it too much, it turns your roots a powdery white."
So, if you're sick of your grease-ball hair, or just hate showering, this product could be perfect for you. A can costs about $6, and you can find it at most drugstores. And no worries, the product lives up to its name: When sprayed, it does sound like "Psssst." Crazy, isn't it?
// HANNAH DECLERK
Photo by Hannah DeClerk
Spray away your troubles: Passssst Instant Spray
Shampoo saves you from the rinse-lather-repeat
routine by giving your hair an between-wash
freshen-up.
tomorrow's news // NOOK
just call us Cleo.
Nook, the new digital reader from Barnes and Noble, just may change the way you read.
For $259 you get access to more than one million eBooks, magazines and newspapers via a 3G wireless connection. Most new release and best-selling books are sold for $9.99. Nook has a library of 2GB, which translates into 17,500 titles, including pictures and music.
For those who like to scribble and jot notes in their novels, Nook offers the ability to bookmark and highlight passages. You can also enlarge the font without a glare or backlight on the 8-by-5-inch display.
Brian Miller, Shawnee junior, says Nook could be beneficial because it provides reading material without carrying any books. "It would be worth it if you could get textbooks," he says.
And just in case you want to stylishly protect your e-reader, covers are available from designers including Kate Spade and Jonathan Adler.
Creasing pages have become a thing of the past, so grab a cup of coffee and cuddle up with a Nook.
// KELCI SHIPLEY
Contributed photo
Nice and cozy: Barnes and Noble's 'Nook' digital reader claims to be the book of the future. The competitor to Amazon's 'Kindle' reader, the Nook has a 2GB memory, allowing for about 17,500 downloaded fulltext books, pictures and songs.
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