NOTICE
wescoe wit lol.
PROFESSOR:
I love creepy. Creepy dying scenes
are the best
GIRL 1: I shrunk my sweater on accident.
GIRL 2: OMG, it is so small now.
**GIRL 1:** Yeah like now it will only fit baby
ehms
GIRL 2: Ew, that sucks.
GIRL: I mean, It's not like the drug will cause anything deadly like brain hemorrhoids.
PROFESSOR:
It's called 'deontology,' not to be confused with Deon Sanders.
GIRL 1: Sometimes I will sit and try to find what is hidden in the box of coals.
GIRL 2: What? You mean the display box of coats in Anschutz?
GIRL 1: Yeah. I just wonder if anyone has found what is hidden among the coals yet.
GIRL 2: It is a display of coals to show what the library will ruh on ...
GIRL 1: Oh, shoot. I have been wasting a lot of time then.
GUY (SINGING):
So I put my hands up; they're playing my song, I know I'm gonna be okay Yeeeessaaah, it's a party in the U.S.A.
GIRL (ON THE PHONE):
I don't know. I roiled over this morning and the guy had a beard like Kenny Loggins. I left shortly after.
// HANNAH DECLERK
celebritweets // DANE COOK (danecook) Twitter musings of the rich and/or famous.
Is Jon Bon Jovi capable of singing without spreading his arms like a condor?
Hey Jovi..decent show..great wingspan!
4:00 PM Oct 5th
I don't like the word whore. I prefer the term penis enthusiast. 5:13 PM Oct 4th
Here's 1 4 UrbanDictionary. Twitturd: Nobody retweets your tweet. It's a dud.
U want 2 delete it in shame because u suck. #Twitturd
8:04 PM Oct 3rd
Wikipedia blows dead dicks. I'd rather get information from a liar. Do me a favor update this on it.' Wiki, where maybe is definitely!
10:42 PM Sep 30th
I've mixedup the words cadaver & godiva 4 years. Thought they were cadaver chocolates or a rotting godiva was found in the woods.
7:39 PM Sep 19th
When a girl rejects me sexually I don't get blue balls. I get red balls. I get blue balls when I'm listening 2 whales sing. #MoodBalls 6:22 PM Sep 18th
Kanye did something incredible tonight. He made me like country music. Kanye is now a Kanyunt.
7:47 PM Sep 13th
// TAKEN FROM TWITTER.COM BY HANNNAH DECLERK
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SATURDAY OCT. 31ST: EOTO
TUESDAY, NOV. 3RD: EVERGREEN TERRACE
WEDNESDAY, NOV. 4TH: EMILIE AUTUMN
THURSDAY, NOV. 5TH: PINBACK
FRIDAY, NOV. 6TH JOSHUA RADIN
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