Section B · Page 4
The University Daily Kansan
Thursday, December 3, 1998
Holiday blues can make December depressing
Range of pressures contribute to sadness
By Amber Stuever Special to the Kansan
Special to the Kansan
It's a season known for family gatherers, warmth and good cheer, but many students dealing with a range of pressures during the holidays know that the season dubbed as the most wonderful time of the year quickly quickly turn sour.
The holiday blues, or in worse cases, seasonal depression, can make December the most depressing time of the year.
"The depression and suicidal thinking are particularly high," said Frank DeSalvo Jr., director of Counseling and Psychological Services at Watkins Health Center. "It's related to our culture's unrealistic expectations that people will be at peace and happy at that time. In reality, people are so far from that, they feel bad for thinking differently."
The holly hanging from doorways and the Christmas lights decorating houses won't eliminate problems
that exist for the other 11 months of the year, DelSalvo said. And, in a culture that harps on the joy of the holidays, the good cheer for some may be spread thin.
"Difficulties don't just go away because it' s Dec. 25, " DeSalvo said.
The causes of the holiday blues are numerous and range from dealing with final exam stress and homesickness, to fatigue and money problems.
Bren Bloomquist, Lindsborg sophomore, said that she felt the blues as a result of being far from her family over the holidays.
"Everything I see and hear reminds me of home, whether I see people out shopping with their parents or putting up Christmas lights," she said. "I count down the days until I can go home and see my family."
For some students, however, the idea of returning home does little to contribute to the joy of the Christmas season. Students going home to family problems would rather avoid being home for the holidays, especially when surrounded by other students who look forward to
"There's no magic about the holiday season making unhappy families happy, but that's the culture's expectation," DeSalvo said.
returning to families.
Clare Fuchs, Overland Park sophomore, said problems with family stemmed from differing expectations when returning home for the long Christmas break.
"I get down over the holidays because I'm used to having total freedom," Fuchs said. "Once you get home it's hard for your parents to tell you what to do again because you consider yourself past that. It feels like I'm regressing."
For those experiencing their first Christmas without a family member, the traditional Christmas may be a shattered memory.
"Both of my grandparents passed away recently," said Derek Hall, Kansas City, Mo., junior. "It's going to be something different to deal with. Certain people who have always been there during the holidays all of a sudden won't be there, and that'll definitely be something different."
DeSalvo said that while our cul-
HOW TO DEAL WITH BLUES
Plan ahead and anticipate problems to avoid unrealistic expectations for the holidays.
Don't spend too much time and energy planning for just one day of the year, no matter
how perfect society says Dec. 25 should be.
*Remember that the holiday season doesn't magically make all your problems go away. It's OK to feel sad or lonely any time.*
away. It's OK to feel sad or lonely any time, and Christmas is no exception.
Take care of yourself. Eat right, get enough sleep and limit your alcohol intake. Alcohol is a depressant, and it will only make you feel worse.
If you think you could use professional help to deal with depression during the holidays, call Counseling and Psychological Services at 864-2277.
ture perceives the mood of the holidays in one way, students may feel very differently during the Christmas season.
"Our culture has the expectation that people will be happy and at peace during that time and for students it's a very hectic time and it's anything but relaxing," DeSalvo said.
The holiday season can lead to depression for many people, especially those unable to see relatives. Photo illustration by Matt J. Dougherty/KANSAN
Worries, caution accompany students home during break
By Kylie Colgan and Matt Merkel-Ness
Special to the Kansan
It's what some University of Kansas students face as the school semester winds down, and it's not just the dreaded final exams.
The adjustment to living with parents and family during the winter break can be difficult or easy for an individual.
Matt Ku, Overland Park freshman, said he knew he wouldn't be able to retain college freedoms such as the absence of a curfew, parental guidance and household chores.
"College freedoms are not enjoyed at my home. I still have to abide by my parents' curfew and keep them informed about all my social activities."
"When I come home, my parents' expectations and curfew will stay the same as before I left for college," Ku said.
Abiding by curfews is just one of many issues students face when returning home. Disputes arise when students accustomed to total freedom must face authority again.
"College freedoms are not enjoyed at my home," said Sonya Mohseni, Philadelphia junior. "I still have to abide by my parents' curfew and keep them informed about all my social activities."
Ashley Eis, Winfield sophomore, agreed that winter break is a return to a precollege lifestyle.
Sonya Mohseni Philadelphia junior
"It's a lot different," Eis said. "It feels like I'm in high school again."
The six-week length of winter break is another issue for students accustomed to a month-long break. Melissa Thomson, Lenexa sophomore, said she thought the length was appropriate.
"It's about right," Thomson said. "You have a month to go on vacation, work, relax and be away from the stresses of school."
Tony Svoboda, Overland Park sophomore, said he thought the present length of the winter break was perfect.
"I think it's a good amount of time because you don't fall out of your routine and at the same time get a break from
Other students, such as Mohsen, thought that the winter break was too long.
"By the time I get back, I'm not in the school mode because I've forgotten what it's like to study and go to classes," Mohsen said. "I think if it was shorter, the problem could be alleviated."
Winter break can be painful for the students who don't enjoy spending time with their family.
"My family is great individually, but when they get together, they fight," said Greg Smith, Overland Park junior. "I hate it."
Smith said he only visits home once or twice a month. Visiting at holidays can be even worse, he said.
"I don't mind going home, but I don't like going home when most of my family is
there." Smith said.
Nathan Judd, Tecumseh sophomore, said he isn't looking forward to extended family time over the holidays.
"My family makes me mad," Judd said. "We don't get together very often, but when we do, there is some pointless argument that stops the whole progression of the festivities for the evening."
A decision on how to cope with family issues during holiday break is made by most college students ahead of time. Thomson said she will stay in her home in Lawrence when she needs a break from parents and family during holiday break.
"Basically I know if I get sick of them, I can leave and to go my place here for a break away." Thomson said.
Sarah Portwood, Leawood sophomore, plans to use a similar tactic at home during the holidays.
"I just ask on working so I have time out of the house," she said. "I also come up to Lawrence to get together with friends whenever I can."
The holidays aren't a painful time for everyone. Chris Eckert, Topeka sophomore, will return home for the entire break
for the first time since he began college. His family moved to New Jersey at the end of his sophomore year of high school, and he returned to Topeka for his senior year. Since then, he hasn't spent much time with his family, returning home for only eight days this past summer and nine days over winter break last year.
"Every time I go back, it's a scramble to see all of my relatives," Eckert said. "I'll do that the first week back, and after that I'll have time to relax."
Mohseni will return to Philadelphia for winter break. She said she looks forward to the shopping trips with her mother, picking out the Christmas tree with her dad and taking her younger sister to see Santa Claus.
"I fall back into typical family traditions, and we spend time together," Mohseni said. "I get extra attention being the college girl at home."
Diana Bradbury, Wichita junior, is looking forward to the chance to spend time with her family and see her younger brother again.
"It's more than celebration; it's just a time to go home," Bradbury said.
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