Monday; August 17, 1998
The University Daily Kansan
Section D · Page 11
College introduces unfamiliar pressures
Students advised to seek support
By Both Janes
Kansan staff writer
When John Peckham first came to the University of Kansas, he thought life would be one big party.
"I started going out every weekend and after about a month got all stressed out because classes were a lot harder than I thought," the Lyons senior said. "I flunked the first round of tests in all my classes and just started flipping out."
For Peckham, talking with his older sister and re-evaluating his priorities remedied the situation.
Adjusting to University life can be difficult. Although some students adapt easily, others may need extra help. For those students, several services are available.
Counseling and Psychological Services, located on the second floor of Watkins Memorial Health Center, offers individual and group counseling sessions.
"Our purpose is to help students deal with problems we know are going to come up and deal with them in a way that they don't have to miss school," said Frank DeSalvo, psychologist and CAPS director. "That means early intervention and providing these services on campus at a price students can afford."
DeSalvo said that many of the students who visited the office were depressed or anxious because of academic, financial or relationship difficulties.
"Most students have some adjustment issues but just because you have them doesn't mean you need counseling," he said. "If, as a result of dealing with those issues, symptoms arise lasting longer than two
weeks, that indicates you might need to talk to somebody."
DeSalvo said that common symptoms were changes in sleeping patterns or appetite, a significant loss or gain of weight and decreased energy or motivation.
Deciding on a career or field of study can be a major source of stress, DeSalvo said. CAPS provides a career counseling and planning service. Various career-assessment tests, in which counselors talk students through the results, can help with decision-making.
"Not nearly as many students take advantage of this as we would hope. Many come in their junior or senior year, when they have wasted a lot of time," DeSalvo said. "We're working to alert students that it is important to talk about, and it's OK to have questions. Almost everybody struggles through this at one point."
Students also can find help with academic or personal challenges at the Student Development Center, 22 Strong Hall. The center sponsors workshops on study skills, test taking and time management, among others.
Mary Ann Rasnak, director of the center, said the program focused on two areas. General-system navigation helps students intimidated by the University to find direction. Learning assessments help students adjust to college academics.
"We would help somebody study smarter," Rasnak said. "The expectations on the part of teachers is very different than what many students experienced in high school. They are now responsible for being independent learners."
"There are different things competing for time and studying may not come out on top. We try to remind students to take time and study."
Rasnak said that if the Student
STUDY GUIDES
Student Development Center Workshops, Fall 1998
All workshops last one hour. Admission is free.
Getting a Grip on Time and Priority Management
2 p.m., Tuesday at Alderson Auditorium in the Kresge Union
7 p.m., Sept. 15 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
tortium in the Kansas Union
7 p.m. Seat 15 at the Pioneer
4 p.m., Nov. 3 at the Pine Room in the Kansas University
Bureaucracy 101 - Getting Around in the KU System
6 p.m., Sept. 10 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
4 p.m. Oct. 13 at the Pine Room in the Kansas Union
Being Strategic - Reading and Listening for Learning
Development Center staff could not help someone they would make a referral.
"There are a lot of people who are here to help, but students just need
4 p.m., Sept. 23 at the Pine Room in the Kansas Union
7 p.m., Oct. 6 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
7 p.m., Oct. 27 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
4 p.m., Sept. 30 at the Pine Room in the Kings Union
4 p.m., Dec. 1 at the Pine Room in the Kansas Union
Beyond Guesswork - Studying for and Taking Exams
7 p.m., Dec. 1 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
Sweaty Palms No More - Man-
6 p.m., Oct. 20 at the Pioneer Room in the Burge Union
6 p.m. December 13th
Room in the Burge Union
Room in the Burge Snork
6 p.m., Dec. 2 at the Pioneer
to approach them," she said. "My advice is to get help when you need it before the problems sneak up on you. No one drowns without yelling for help."
Tough love: Long-distance dating causes close-to-home challenges
By Liz Wristen Kansan staff writer
Living hundreds of miles from a boyfriend or girlfriend is a way of life that many students at the University of Kansas have endured.
Kelly Prince and Kara Donohoe are currently in long-distance relationships.
Prince, Shawnee senior, and Donhooe, Harrisonville, Mo., junior, are both dating men who attend schools in other states.
Prince's boyfriend Jeremy is a senior at Gustavus Adolphus College in Saint Peter, Minn. Prince met him in 1994 at a debate camp. They became friends and promised to write to each other after the camp ended.
"He didn't write, but I got a call from him the day I moved to college." Prince said. "After that we e-mailed on and off for the next couple of years and then we started dating last February."
The couple began dating after they attended a sorority formal dance. They have dated for five months and see each other once every six weeks, Prince said.
Donohoe's boyfriend J.D. isn't quite so far away. He attends the University of Missouri-Columbia. The two met in 1995 through a friend and attended junior prom together, Donohoe said. They dated for two years before college.
"Once we got to college, we decided to do our own thing for awhile," Donohoe said. "We broke up for a year and didn't talk for six months, but then when we finally started talking again, my friends set him up with me for a date party."
The two began dating after the party. They have been together for seven months and see each other every two to three weeks, Donohoe said.
Students in long-distance relationships should become
involved in University activities, said Frank DeSalvo, director of Counseling and Psychological Services.
"It's also important for both people in the relationship to be honest and let each other know what they have been doing to keep busy while the other person is away," he said.
Both Prince and Donohoe said they tried to stay busy while apart from their boyfriends.
Prince is a full-time student, works 25 hours a week, holds an office in her sorority, volunteers at Colonial Manor Nursing Home and spends time with friends.
"Jeremy and I both understand that friends are important," Prince said. "We were friends
"I don't think that students should look at long-distance relationships as a negative thing. You can do your own thing, hang out with your friends, have time to study and do extracurricular activities,and just live your own life without constantly having the other person around you."
Studies also are important for Donohoe, who spends many hours studying for her classes. Extracurricular activities and spending time with friends keep her on a tight schedule.
Harrisonville, Mo., junior
for so long before we started dating, so we know that friendship is important."
Communication — whether by e-mail, telephone or other creative means — is important in maintaining a long-distance relationship, said Linda L. Keeler, psychiatrist at Counseling and Psychological Services.,
"Couples don't necessarily need to have daily contact. Instead, they need to keep them
selves busy with other activities," she said.
Shorter conversations may prevent isolation from peers who are not in relationships, Keeler said.
Prince and Donohoe said they talked with their boyfriends four to five nights a week. Those nightly calls cost Prince about $70 a month.
"You've got to be interested in what the other person does on a
day-to-day basis", Prince said. "So our phone conversations kind of become like dates for us."
For Donohoe, life apart from her bovrier has its benefits.
"I don't think that students should look at long-distance relationships as a negative thing." Donohoe said. "You can do your own thing, hang out with your friends, have time to study and do extracurricular activities, and just live your own life without constantly having the other person around you."
It gives me time to catch up with my boyfriend on weekends," she said. "It makes the time we spend together even more beneficial than if we were together all the time."
Keeler said that students having difficulties with long-distance relationships should contact Counseling and Psychological Services at 864-2277.
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