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[Oh, you guys say some of the darndest things.]
Not to make you all scared, but we're eavesdropping on your conversations. Yes, we hear everything. And then we print it. But don't worry if you say something stupid, we won't identify you — unless you owe us money or beer.
Guy 1: I had the best nap EVER yesterday.
Guy 2: Yeah, naps are funny. You're sleeping in the day and the dreams get all fucked up.
Guy 1: Yeah, for sure.
Guy 2: Yeah.
**Guy:** (whispering in his girlfriend's ear)
**Girl:** He-he, that was fun.
**Guy:** (whispering)
**Girl:** Uh-huh. But don't do that with your teeth anymore, OK?
**Guy:** Hey, that looks like Padgett (former Kansas basketball player) over there.
**Guy 2:** It does. Huh.
Guy 3: Guys, Padgett goes to North Carolina now, remember?
Guy 1: Oh, yea. But he sure is tall.
Guy 3: (Shakes his head in apparent embarrassment)
Editor's Note: Dave Padgett plays for the Louisville Cardinals, not the North Carolina Tar Heels.
— Samia Khan
5ive questions
One KU "famous," one KU not (yet) famous
Kevin Ward KU Men's golfer
Brian Kueffer
Overland Park
freshman
1) Who is your favorite college mascot, beaded the Jayhawk?
Kueffer: The Virginia Tech Hokie, that's a good one.
Ward: I'd say the Florida Gator, it's intimidating.
2) If you and a group of friends were starving, would you volunteer yourself to be eaten?
Ward: I would hope it never came to that, but no, probably not.
Kueffer: Well, if that's what it came to,
sure, I guess.
3) Who would win in a fight, Laura Bush or Theresa Heinz-Kerry? Kueffer: Probably Laura Bush, she has the Texas advantage. Everything's bigger in Texas.
Ward: It would be a draw. They're both pretty tough ladies.
4) What's your favorite kind of cheese?
Kueffer: Well, I'm not much of a cheese person, but I make grilled cheese with American.
Ward: American, but I get pepper-jack once and a while to spice things up a bit.
5) What is the last song you sang karaoke to?
Keuffer: "Life's been good to me" by Joe Walsh. That was funny.
Ward: I saw someone sing, "You lost that loving feeling" from Top Gun once, that was great. But can't remember the last time I sang karaoke.
Erik Johnson
By Jessi Crowder and Chris Tackett
[Lust is the best deadly sin.]
I cheated on my boyfriend a while back. Since then we've gotten back together, but I'm feeling tinges of jealousy when it comes to him and other girls. Do I have any right to jealousy?
Jessi: I tend to believe jealousy is a useless emotion, though I think we all encounter it at some point. We feel jealous when we feel entitled to someone or something. In that regard, we really don't have the right. Instill a sense of trust in him, and more than likely, he won't let you down if he knows the ball's in his court (and his pants.) Also, your insecurities might also be some leftover guilt from when you screwed around. Get over what you did, and focus in on what he didn't.
Chris: Ah sweetie, so you mean you're a little worried the person you're in a committed relationship with is going to mess around with someone else? How devastating! You should be jealous. Oh wait, you mean you cheated on him first? Slut.
My long-time partner is pressuring me to move in with him. I care about him very much, but I'm not sure if I'm ready. What should I tell him?
-Kalen, Junior
Chris: Moving in with a loved one is a pretty serious act. I've never considered doing that and I don't know what I'd do in your situation. But I think a good open conversation on the issue is your best bet. Tell him it's too soon, his apartment sucks, whatever, but don't move in unless you're ready, because packing sucks.
Jessi: That you're not ready to live with him yet.
Got a burning question for us?
Well, then send your questions to bitch@kansan.com. We'll soothe those flare-ups for ya. Kind of like Preperation H without the check-out counter awkwardness.
10.7.04 Jayplay
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