s ar g
bearing it all for a Brazilian
by Jacky Carter Think you know pain? Try having all your pubic hair ripped out.
My nether region is not happy.
She is scared and on display and not looking forward to what's about to happen.
I'm scared too. I'm waiting on a table with a small hand towel barely concealing my girl parts. From the waist up, I'm fully dressed. I actually look like I could be going to work — I'm wearing a green button down shirt and a white cardigan — but I'm in a salon, horizontal, waiting to be stripped of all my public hair. The woman I've entrusted to do this,
Alex, left the room for me to take off my pants and underwear so I'm just lying on the table, staring at the ceiling, wondering what I've gotten myself into.
I have never had any waxing — Brazilian or otherwise — so leaving such a delicate area in the hands of a stranger makes me nervous. I clutch the sides of the table for support. Alex comes over to my side, stirs the soy-based wax and prepares the strips. She moves calmly, and as we talk, her soothing voice slows my racing heart. In linen pants and flip flops, she exudes comfort. Just as I stop freaking out, Alex positions a lamp over my vagina, looking at the job before her.
of a heart or a star seems silly. And the "landing strip," made famous in Playboy, which leaves a vertical strip of hair, just doesn't seem right either.
Take it all off, I say.
And thus begins one of the most painful experiences of my life.
Do you want to remove everything or leave a little, she asks.
I contemplate my options. If I'm getting a wax, I might as well have her remove everything. Some people opt for shapes, but having a patch of pubic hair in the shape
You can't tell from our conversation that I'm battling extreme anguish. Do you go to school here? What is your major? How old are you?
AND AS MUCH AS YOU'RE GONNA SAY YOU DON'T HAVE HAIR THERE, FACE IT. YOU DO.
As I discuss my December
graduation and plans to enter the magazine world, Alex has me position my legs in the shape of the number four. My left leg is straight and my right leg
bends and touches my left knee.
She starts by my leg sockets. I hadn't considered that this was the least sensitive spot to wax and that it would only get worse. Alex applies the wax — it is warm and feels good. Mid-conversation, before I realize what's happening, she pulls off the wax strip.
OK. Not too bad, I think to myself.
I can do this.
After she strips sections, Alex uses tweezers to remove any stray hairs. Then she gently applies tea tree oil.The natural antiseptic helps prevent bumps and infections from having open hair follicles.
Our conversation about East coast versus West coast and living in Europe almost distracts me from what is going on down below. Lest I forget, my new friend is staring at my vagina the entire time.
So far, the pain isn't bad and the
situation of exposing my private parts to someone I've known five minutes isn't awkward. I think of her like a gynecologist — she has looked between the legs of so many women that she's used to it.
For nearly 30 minutes, Alex efficiently and thoroughly strips away my pubic hair. Sometimes the little pricks don't hurt. But as she moves closer toward my labia, the pain becomes more intense. Sometimes it hurts so bad I have flashbacks to the waxing scene in The 40-Year-Old Virgin. Sometimes I have to pause the conversation when she rips off my hair because I can't think about anything but the pain. And sometimes, my whole lower half jolts a few inches off the table in shock.
Oh no, my vagina is certainly not happy.
But for some reason, women endure the pain of Brazilian waxing, some as often as every four to six weeks, in order to be hair-free. The Brazilian wax differs from other waxing, like bikini waxing, because it also removes hair from your ass crack. And as much as you're gonna say you don't have hair there, face it. You do.
The technique originated in — you guessed it — Brazil. Women's bathing suits were becoming more revealing in the '70s (think thong bottoms) and the standard bikini wax wasn't cutting it anymore.
Brazilian waxes didn't really find a following in the United States until the early '90s. They didn't become popular until recently — thanks to celebrities, including Scarlett Johannson, Gywneth Paltrow and characters on Sex & the City. The first American Pie movie even has a scene where one of the characters is so turned on by seeing his first Brazilian wax that can't maintain control of his bodily functions.
Before you make an appointment with a waxer, it's important to go in for a consult first, says Starr Ottlinger, a licensed cosmetologist at Strands Salon & Day Spa. Some women can't handle having their upper lip waxed, and that's completely different from the Brazilian area.
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she says. Ottlinger has had clients come in for a Brazilian wax but couldn't make it past the bikini area.
Ifyoudecidetogettheprocedure done, make an appointment. Don't expect same-day service. The waxer cleanses the area before applying wax, but Ottinger recommends that the client wash herself before the appointment. You also need to make sure that the person performing the wax washes her hands and only dips a stick into the wax one time. Dipping
a used stick back into the pot can contaminate the wax and cause infections.
A l thoug Hottlering performs Brazilians, she says she also discourages them. "The hair is there for a purpose," she says. People read about Brazilians and think they're cool, she says, but waxing can also cause infections and ingrown hairs. The Hair Facts Web site, www.hairfacts.com/medpubs/waxmed.html, includes cases of medical complications from waxing. Whether you're having a Brazilian wax or just a bikini, make sure to use aloe, vitamin E or tea tree oil to soothe the skin and prevent infections.
Katie Johnson, Overland Park senior, has only
recently started getting Brazilian waxes, but she's hooked."The very first time was the worst pain in my entire life," she says. "I wanted to cry, but it hurt too bad."The waxes still hurt, but not nearly as bad as the first one, she says.
Johnson goes for a wax every
TAKE IT OFF Places in Lawrence that offer full Brazilian waxes
four or five weeks. The benefits of a Brazilian overshadow the pain, she says. It takes longer for her hair to grow back, and when it does, it's thinner and not spiky, she says. "You'll love it, but you have to do it again after the first time," she says. "It's amazing." She also says she feels cleaner and isn't bothered by shaving all the time anymore.
Just when I think Alex is finished, she asks me to bend my legs, pull them up to my chest and hold them there. This is when she gets to work on part of the process
Beauty Brands Salon Spa Super Center $65 and up 3514 Clinton Parkway (785)749-2510
Images Salon & Day Spa
$65
511 W. Ninth St.
(785) 843-2138
Lada Salon & Spa
855
4931 W. Sixth St., #116
(785) 842-5232
Rejuvene Salon & Day Spa
$85 (modified prices for partial
Brazilians)
2108 W. 27 St.
(785) 865-4372
Salon di Marco and Day Spa
$40 and up
733 Massachusetts St.
(785) 843-0044
Strands Salon & Day Spa
$60
708 W. Ninth St.
(785) 832-9890
get little red bumps, similar to those from shaving, but using tea tree oil helps calm the skin.
Two weeks later, my girl part isn't mad at me anymore. After a day, she's used to her makeover, and I won't rule out a return visit in four to six weeks quite yet.
My crotch feets like it has been punched, and for another hour, I have to be careful how I sit. The next morning, my skin is still red, but Alex had warned me that redness is normal and canlast from a few hours until the next day. Sometimes you
exclusive to the Brazilian — ripping out all the hair I'm convinced isn't hiding between my butt cheeks.
Once Alex finishes and I can finally close my legs, she asks me to take a look. I don't really know what to say, as the pain resonating from my lower half has consumed my focus. "Oh, it looks nice," I tell her. I'm not in the habit of commenting on my vagina's appearance, but I figure a response is necessary in this situation.
ALTERNATIVES TO WAXING Sugaring
Similar to wax although not as popular, sugar waxing involves applying a sugary substance on hair. Just like waxing, this process uses a strip to adhere to the sug and rip out the hair. Sugar waxin isn't as messy as waxing because the substance is more water soluable.