THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, 2006
SEX ON THE HILL
BOOK REVIEW
7C
'Slipped bare' explores the SECRET LIFE OF WOMEN
BY JODI ANN HOLOPIREK
"An erotically charged tale of tragic warning [that] lingers in memory like one of those heart-stopping dreams filled with eerily familiar strangers" — Boston Herald
That quote, the raw and unexpected rush of it, compelled me to read this story of a woman laid bare by her thoughts and dreams: "The Bride Stripped Bare" by Nikki Gemmell, which was first published anonymously, shows the day-to-day thoughts of a newly married housewife in the form of a diary. Gemmell, who has garnered attention in her native Australia, and London, her home, chose to publish "Bride" anonymously because she "... wanted to strip bare the secret life of an everyday woman, and be utterly ruthless about that. I wanted to reveal the complex underbelly of her sexuality, in all its beauty and ugliness." Gemmell believed the only way for her to do that and not worry about family constricting her candid thoughts was to publish anonymously. However, news reporters discovered her name not long after the book was in stores.
In every way, the form of this book adds new meaning to what is being said. Gemmell uses three forms rarely used by writers in "Bride." She wrote it using the second person narrative, she never uses quotes to signify when someone is speaking and she doesn't give the protagonist a name. This makes for a more challenging read at first, but after the reader adapts to Gemmell's style, it has a way of making the reader feel as if she is the protagonist, right in the middle of everything going on.
In an interview with Peter Babiak, which first appeared in "SubTerrain" magazine, Gemmell said, "... I wanted 'The Bride Stripped Bare' to be about every woman and any woman in a sense. I hated the idea of my own name — any individual's name — being attached to it. For it becomes much easier then to dismiss the book as 'just so-and-so's thoughts'. ... Some people have said of my unnamed bride that it was like 'reading her brain, being in her headspace,' which was exactly the effect I was aiming for."
In the book, each chapter opens with a credo for how to be a good housewife, such as "modesty is holy and good" and "the chief causes of the weak health of women are silence, stillness and stays; therefore learn to sing and dance and never wear tight stays." As you read on though, you discover that She, the protagonist, is anything but just a simple housewife.
"Bride" opens with Cole and Her on their honeymoon in Marrakech, Morocco. After four months, they've finally scheduled in the time to take it. While the love is still new and fascinating. She already knows what She likes and dislikes about her husband and has settled for what will never be better between them, like the sex, as shown in the following brief snippets.
"Your relationship works delightfully, easily, in so many ways, except for the sex. ... One thing you could never tell your husband is that his coming takes too long. And that his penis seems bent, and often goes soft in you, as if it's thinking of something else. ... He's never given you an orgasm. He assumes he has."
Almost as fast as the honeymoon begins, it ends. Cole gets caught talking to Her best friend on the phone in a sweet, flirty voice. From there, all hell breaks loose in the marriage.
Throughout the rest of the book, She learns how to hold on to her sanity with a deceptive husband and best friend. She learns how to navigate her marriage's disappointments (Cole being unwilling to have sex during her pregnancy) and triumphs (Her first orgasm with her husband). She learns what She should expect from herself. And She learns how to indulge her fantasies without looking back.
She becomes acquainted with a man at a cafe She frequents and soon they're meeting secretly, enjoying the seductiveness of keeping what they have just
the details
Author: Nikki Gemmel
Year Published: 2004
Publisher: Harper Collins
Price: $13.95
On the Web: http://www.
nikkigemmel.com/bride.php.
between them. With this man. She breaks free of the prison her husband's affair has put her in, both emotionally and physically.
In the process, She becomes two people, developing a persona for the outside world, and one for the secret fantasies She allows herself to experience. By the end of the book, the reader is applauding Her for what She's been through, but wondering how She can still hold her head up with dignity, especially when looking at her husband.
At times, the reader wants to be the protagonist's best friend; but then he or she will flip the page and want to slap Her silly for what She has done to herself, to her husband, to her lover. This book delves deep into the psyche of a woman and her sexuality, the beauty of it, the ugliness of it, the barren truth of it.
As a woman, "The Bride Stripped Bare" is a must read. You'll find Her mimicking the thoughts you have hidden from the people near you. As a man, you'll be astonished to discover how base, how brazen, how bold women can be when left to their imaginations.
Kansan copy chief Jodi Ann Holopirek can be contacted at jholopirek@kansan.com.
Edited by Jonathan Kealing
An accepting town
LGBT community receives tolerance asks for more
BY ZACH RAINEY
A national publication for members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community has included Lawrence among the top 100 college campuses in the country in terms of its friendliness to members of the LGBT community.
"I believe there is a strong tolerance for queer people on this campus, but that [some students] are afraid to fully accept queer couples as a part of the KU culture," said Jonathan Pryor, Columbus, Ohio, senior and director of KU Queers & Allies. "We are very much a well-known subculture that gets some attention and tolerance, but not always the supporting acceptance that Queens & Allies strives to attain."
"I believe Lawrence is very tolerant of the queer community and we have grown strong because of a lot of support from them," Pryor said. "However, I believe there is a strong force of non-acceptance for the queer community" in Lawrence.
Pryor, who is in a relationship with David Ta, Wichita senior, said they hadn't had to face any challenges as a couple. The only challenge they expect to face in the future is a legal one dealing with gay marriage. They do, however, say they feel a lack of acceptance from their fellow students on campus.
"Homophobia is gay," Pryor said. "Your actions and words can forever scar a trust between two people — just because you made it apparent that if they were queer you would not accept and love them."
Ta had advice for LGBT couples struggling with the fear of
not being accepted.
"You can let people who have not had exposure to any queer life put you down, but at the same time you should not be outright mean to them," Ta said. "In my experience, with confidence and niceness, people will have a hard time being mean, and you can start reconciling some differences or answer some questions they may have regarding sexual orientation."
The lack of acceptance, some students say, comes from not understanding the difference and similarities.
"LGBT people are members of the human race," said Crystal Hong, Rose Hill sophomore. "We have two eyes and 10 toes. We think with our brains, pump blood with our hearts and breathe oxygen with our lungs. What you think, I think. What you say, I say. What you do, I do. And, most of all, what you deserve, I deserve."
Hong's partner, Seantella Cottner of Derby, is a junior at Kansas State University. Her message to all students struggling with their sexuality is to "be who you are and don't allow other people's opinions to affect that, because if the world isn't exposed to homosexuality, it will never get used to it and grow to accept it."
grow to accept "Love is not gender-based. When you are asked, 'Why do you love him/her?' your first response is never, 'Because he's male' or 'Because she's female.' It's something like, 'He makes me laugh' (or) 'She has a great smile', or 'I can't imagine life without him/her,'." Hong said. "Once this basic concept of love is fully grasped, the world will be capable of acceptance and understanding."
Kansan correspondent Zach Rainey can be contacted at editor@kansan.com
Edited by Brett Bolton
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