THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
OPINION
WWW.KANSAN.COM
FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 16, 2005
Racism or bad service?
Dear Editor,
I am writing in response to Gina Ford's opinion column, "On the Street Where You Live." I completely agree that racial issues are as important today as because equal opportunity for all people is not yet fully realized in this country. I know that individuals of all minorities still experience prejudice in their daily lives. I've seen it firsthand, read and heard personal accounts.
PAGE 7A
What I have to say is in no way meant to invalidate the experiences of certain columnists, or any other individuals. I merely wish to augment these accounts with some of my own personal experiences.
ences.
I believe that all people, no matter what race, nationality, faith, sexual orientation, etc., deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. I try to, therefore, treat everyone with the same respect and kindness.
Sometimes I encounter individuals who are quick to assume that I wish the worst for them or that I am treating them unfairly. When I used to work as a server in a restaurant, I would from time to time be seated with African-Amer-
ed by s and insan
ican guests who treated me as if I had acted in a racist way towards them.
them. I do not mean to say that all African-American guests acted in this way, merely that certain guests who were African-American attributed their under-par experience to racism and directed resentment and hostility towards me.
American girl.
In times like these, I was often met with mistrust, anger or rudeness. And I understand why, because if someone believes that one has been treated unfairly because of race, nationality, religion, etc., it is natural to feel upset. It is natural to feel angry.
and hostages.
Sometimes this was due to something like waiting a long time for their food, something I had little control over when the cooks were running a little behind. Sometimes this was due to something I had personally done, such as accidentally set their place with a dirty piece of silverware, something that was definitely due to my lack of diligence, but certainly not intentional and not something which only happened to African-American guests.
But what I would like to know is where does one make the distinction between a racist act and just bad circumstances or coincidences? What I mean to say is, bad things happen to people regardless of race or any other characteristic.
Ford writes in her column that there are some "acts of racism" which are "unintentional." What does this mean?
does this mean
That the intentions of a person have no bearing on whether he or she acts in a racist manner? That all unfortunate events that befall a person of a "racial minority," whether they happen intentionally or unintentionally, are racist acts?
As I mentioned previously, I in no way mean to discredit any individuals' experiences, as I do understand that racist acts happen everyday. And most certainly, something needs to be done about these issues.
It seems to me that occasionally certain experiences attributed to racism, though they are unpleasant and unfortunate, have little or nothing to do with racism.
Caitlin Johnson Overland Park sophomore
Don't forget your handcuffs
This past spring break, I had the opportunity to spend a week in London. While there, one of my fellow students proved to be quite curious about the basics of BDSM.
I quickly spent time thinking of lists of possible activities that one could involve in a BDSM relationship, but never actually presented any information about the practice and how to decide if further consideration was warranted for that individual.
Throughout the next few months, remembering that my column is every other Friday, I will explore the topic of BDSM and fetishes. I do not do this to shock or push limits.
struck or punish me. There are many students on this campus who have engaged in light bondage, possibly involving handcuffs, and equally light discipline, including OTK (over the knee) spanking. Esteemed psychologist, Alfred Kinsey, found that there was nothing normal or average about human sexuality and it was with that in mind that I present my introduction to BDSM.
This is the most important thing to keep in mind. With this in mind, there is need to define a few other terms. The Dominant (commonly spelled with an uppercase "D") also known as a Top, Master, Mistress, Dom (male), or Domme (female), is the partner who gains enjoyment from a partner's "surrender of control," according to
"BDSM" is a combination of the following: "B&D" (Bondage & Discipline), "Ds" (Dominance & Submission), and "S&M" (sadomasochism). While different people incorporate diverse aspects into sexual play, consent is obviously a must in all encounters. It is consent that separates BDSM from rape and abuse.
JAMIE EPSTEIN acaster@kansan.com
www.sensuoussadie.com. At times the Dominant is also referred to as a Sadist (someone who derives pleasure from causing another pain), but does not have to be one in the same.
A submissive (or sub or bottom) is the Dominant's counterpart, or one who gains enjoyment from surrendering control (to some degree), and is often considered to be a masochist (someone who derives pleasure from pain), but does not have to be.
While simply put, a slave is a type of submissive, that does not fully encompass the definition. While there is much debate about the differences between a slave and a submissive, I shall try to explain it as I have understood it myself, but remember that many writers on the subject have different variations and that you should feel free to find what works best for you.
There are two other common categories of roles within the BDSM community. The first is the switch. The switch is drawn to find excitement as both a Dominant as well as a submissive. The slave is another role that has some contention behind it's meaning.
That being said, a submissive still retains some rights and power over one's self, especially because they have not given themselves up to another to be owned as property. Slaves are "owned", having entered a contract of their own free will to such and having given personal power over to a Master
or Mistress. Again, I feel the need to stress consent, and also point out that any contract between a Dominant and submissive should be considered only based off the type of relationship sought, and that like any relationship should not be rushed into.
The last two terms that are in need of definition are "bondage" and "discipline." As stated in the beginning, these are the two aspects of BDSM most explored by the average person and can range from fairly vanilla (which by the way refers to someone/thing not of the BDSM community) to intense.
Discipline can involve anything from OTK spanking, to being forced to stand in a corner, or some more severe example. Often this is used by a Dom to train or punish a sub for behavior previously determined as inappropriate.
nity) to increase Sexuality.org's BDSM Handbook says that sociologist Charles Moser estimates that "erotic restraint" has been used by 10 percent of the population at a minimum.
And yet again, I stress the importance of consent in these situations and that if there is a question as to whether an action is BDSM or abuse, one should discuss with one's partner to see how each person views this action so that no one suffers from actual physical or emotional mistreatment.
This information, while new to some, and yet a review to others, will hopefully provide hours of enjoyment for those who choose to utilize it. May all your sexual encounters be "safe, sane and consensual." Enjoy, and have fun.
$ \◆ $ Epstein is a Lenexa sophomore in political science.
Austin Caster, editor
864-4845 or acaster @kensn.com
Austin Caster, editor
TALK TO US
Jonathan Kealing, managing editor
864-4854 or jealting kansan.com
Matthew Ssvak, opinion editor
864-4924 or msevak@tansan.com
John Morgan, sales director 864-4462 or addirector@kansan.com
SUBMISSIONS
Sarah Connelly, business manager 864-4014 or adddirector@kansan.com
Malcolm Gibson, general manager,
news adviser
864-1667 or mgibson@kansan.com
Jennifer Weaver, sales and marketing adviser 884-7666 or iweaver@kansan.com
The Kansan reserves the right to edit, cut to length, or reject all submissions. For any questions, call Austin Caster at 864-4810 or e-mail opinion@kansan.com.
The Kansan welcomes letters to the editors and guest columns submitted by students, faculty and alumni.
LETTER GUIDELINES
Maximum Length: 650 word limit
Include: Author's name; class, home-
student (student); position (faculty
member); phone number (will not be
published)
number will not print
General questions should be directed to the editor at editor@kansan.com
GUEST COLUMN GUIDELINES
Also: The Kansaan will not print guest columns that attack another columnist.
Maximum Length: 200 word limit
Include: Author's name and telephone number; class, hometown (student); position (faculty member); phone number (will not be published)
EDITORIAL BOARD
Ellis Ford, Vanting Wang, Julia Melin Coito, Dan Haven, Ann Wattner, Jane Pailan, Nathan McGinnia, Joah Goetting, Sara Garlick, Chase Edgerton, Rw Wittinger, David Archer
Who can respect someone who calls a number to purely make cynical comments? Fraternities are not for everyone, but they are for some.
SUBMIT TO
Kansas in newsroom
111 Stauffer-Flint Hall
1435 Jayhawk Blvd.
Lawrence, KS 68045
(786) 864-4891 opinion@kansas.com
I personally guarantee that if you saw a fraternity guy walking down the street, you would not say these comments to his face. So, if you cannot say it to a person's face, then it does not need to be said at all.
There is no need to be hateful. At least they're a part of something. What are you apart of? The loser hotline?
THE MAX FACTOR
Every time I read the Free for All, someone is given space to make comments about a fictitious greek house called "Rhombus." This someone most likely has no life or nothing better to do.
Next time you try to blast a group of people, at least have the guts put your name behind it.
What's worse is that this person is blasting something that they probably have never been a part of and most likely know nothing about.
P. S. I expect you guys to say something in the Free for All tomorrow about me, but just stand up for what you got to say and I will respect that.
ing better to do.
Whoever it is trying to blast
the greek community.
Bringin' down the house
LETTER TO THE EDITOR
I was a member of the greek community for two years and then last year decided to get out. I did not fit in with the majority of the whole fraternity people: an upper class white male, which wears collared shirts and drinks beer.
Do not be a little coward and call Free for All and try to act funny, because you are no Dave Chapelle. Honestly, no one cares what you have to say. Listen to the T.I. song, "Stand Up," and then get back to me.
I am from Chicago Heights, my father is a retired firefighter and my mom works at a hospital in Englewood, for all you who don't know, that is housing project.
My family is not wealthy. I don't wear collared shirts, and I'm know I won't be rich unless I earn it for myself.
But I still refrain from making negative comments about fraternities, and yes, I said
fraternities, not frats, because that word has a negative connotation.
One day,you are going to realize it is more important to be respected than liked.
notation.
Some of my best friends are in fraternity chapters and I have the utmost respect for all of them. Their lifestyle does not harm anyone.
FREE FOR ALL
- "Don't be square, rush Rhombus!" (9/6)
+ "You know what's cooler than a DU pre-party? A Rhombus pre-party! "Rhombus giggling" (9/6)
♦ "To the men of Delta Chi,
I know who slashed your tires.
It was Rhombus House" (9/9)
- "I heard Bill Braskey was in Rhombus House."(9/12)
♪ "I heard Sigma Nu was moving out, and Rhombus house was moving in." (9/13)
Joel Simone Chicago Heights
6
Call 864-0500
Free for All
Free for All callers have 20 seconds to speak about any topic they wish. Kansas editors reserve the right to omit comments. Slanderous and obscene statements will not be printed. Phone numbers of all incoming calls are recorded.
Frank Tankard is my friend and roommate, and he didn't write "quers" in there. The editor did. You don't know him! You don't know him! So just back off!
For serious, what's with all these abortion call-ins to the Free for All?
Anschutz library makes me horny.
When the mountain lion comes from the graveyard, we're going to watch him maul the smokers at McCollum, and then rub his belly.
I'm going to push a hoop with a stick down a dirt road!
Who would win in a fight, John Cornish or Mike Ditka?
The new supernatural show on the WB is set in Lawrence, Kansas.
I'm not really sure what this whole Sex on the Hill thing is, but as long as I can look at half-naked people in the fountain, it makes my day. I didn't know the University had its own porn industry.
My roommate is in his underwear in the living room, listening to Jock Jams. I need a new roommate.
Whoever lost your car key in Hayworth on Sept. 13th, don't worry, I've got it.
Hey, Jorgensen, want to go to the Pants Party with me?
Oh, Free for All, what has happened to my whistle. I miss it so. Telling me when I get out of class and stuff. Can we get it back? Every other Wednesday?
I voted for KUnited, and all I got was this lousy bus system.
Josh Goetting needs to set himself straight because... yeah.
I am in love with my psychology 104 teacher.
Do Jayhawks have large talons?
Free for All, listen. People need to go out on weekdays. Who cares about class?
I just want to say the ice bar at Quinton's is awesome.
Free for All, I watching slug-sex. Slug-sex!
Is this Safe Ride? I need some guys to pick me up and take me to McDonald's.
There's some girls who just mooned McColum, and we just wanted to say that they should work on their glutes.
When did flag football turn in to the NFL? Seriously, who takes stats for flag football?
✨
Hi, I went to give the bouncer at Quinton's a high-five, but he hugged me so hard I think he broke my neck.
I can call Free for All as many times as I want, because I'm hammered and it's my birthday.
Free for All is so much better than facebook.com.
I want my MTV back, mid-90s style. Screw Laguna Beach, and those who like it.
+
This is for the person who called in about abortions Where exactly did you get your resources?
Kanye West is not an idiot. Maybe you'd know if you were a black person growing up in America.
Hey fellow Jayhawks! On Saturday it's bring a buck day at the stadium. Don't forget!
On a scale from disappointing to good, it's good.
My hat's off to Eric Jorgensen. That man is a living legend.
Eric Jorgensen and Matt Sevcik: brilliant!
So, I just lost my Free for All virginity, and it was way better than losing my real virginity.
Beware the fifth year seniors searching for girls on facebook.com.
So why isn't everybody on campus voting for Big Jay in the mascot challenge?
+
Whatever happened to Big League Chew?
I'm only calling in because everyone else on campus is on their phone and I felt a little left out.