Bitch moan&
With Brian Bratichak and Jessica Crowder
Please send your questions to udk_bitch@kansan.edu
I got out of a relationship a while back and ever since I've been having random one-night stands. I really want to stop, but I don't know how. The sex is addictive. Help! What do I do?
- Taryn, Sophomore
Jessica: Two words. Metal underwear, Just kidding! Why not throw that pack of condoms into your paper shredder? That way you won't think twice about bagging that "butter face" from the bar who's probably just a walking STD. TD hang out in more group settings and
spending one-on-one time with people who don't pose any temptation or who are already in a faithful relationship. It's also wise to have a sober friend around to make sure you go home alone at the end of the night.
Brian: Last week Jessica and I talked about getting an STD test. This is something you need to have done yesterday. You are putting yourself in a strong position to contract a disease. One way to stop with these one-night stands is to have some self-control. While it's definitely easy to sleep with someone with no strings attached, you need to put your health before your libido. Another way to stem your sexual drive would be to take a personal trip to Priscilla's. I'm sure there will be something you could find there to keep you entertained.
I met a cute guy at a different school through Facebook.com and our online talks have become very intimate recently. I want to take our relationship a step further and I'm thinking about sending him a naked picture of me. Do you think this will help our relationship? - Jenny, Junior
Jessica: Totally! If by "helping your relationship" you mean objectify yourself! We're always complaining about men seeing us as pieces of meat. Why not present yourself as a respectable girl and you won't have that problem? This means no, Jenny. No nakey pictures.
Brian: Oh Facebook.com, is there anything you can't do? Yes, Jenny, sending him that picture could help your relationship and end up with you two living happily ever after with two kids, a house in the suburbs and the white picket fence. It could also end up with
your picture on a website and all of his friends knowing you as that easy girl from Kansas. As much as you might want to turn him on, you have to realize that you don't know everything about him. Maybe he does this with lots of girls. Maybe he just collects pictures of naked girls. Maybe he's actually a 40-year-old alumnus who preys on vulnerable college girls. For your safety, keep your clothes on and your camera off.
I'm from out-of-state and I'm still dating my girlfriend from back home. I want to become friends with girls here at KU, but don't want them thinking that I want more. What should I do to make my intentions clear?
- Patrick, Freshman
Brian:The easiest way to not give any girls the wrong idea:DON'T LEADTHEM ON!!! Stay away from the sexual talk,the playful touching, and closed space areas. Keep referencing little facts about your girlfriend and emphasize how much you miss her Unless the girls you are befriending have no morals,they will take the hint.Also,pay attention to your male intuition. If you have any doubts about whether or not you can just be friends with a girl,then you probably shouldn't be friends with her.
Jessica: Go buy a honkin' fake ring at Wal-Mart and put it in a pretty box. Explain to them that this will be your "wifey's" ring. Hopefully then you'll make friends with the opposite sex without them thinking you want to do them. Or, you know, you could always be sly and allude to her by saying something like, "gee, I wonder what I should get my girlfriend for our upcoming anniversary." Easy does it.
How we met
Couple: Scott & Leanne
Leanne Breiby, Olathe senior, and Scott Mayo Lenexa senior, have a relationship that is literally based on a lie.
They first met because Leanne was good friends with Scott's younger sister in high school. Although they both claim there was an initial attraction, neither one made a move. Their friends decided to take action. One friend went to Leanne to tell her that Scott had confessed his interest. The other went to Scott and told him the same about Leanne, although neither had said anything.
On their first group date, Leanne smoothly laid down the line, "So you like me, huh." To which Scott replied, "So, you like me, too." And that's where it all started.
More than two years later, the two happily admit that their union is the result of a couple of little white lies. Leanne loves that Scott can always make her laugh and Scott grins as he tells of his favorite feature about Leanne. "I like her sexy butt," Scott says.
- Katie Moyer